I closed my eyes and let my sword flare even brighter, until it surpassed the sun itself and shone like a collapsing star.
I pulled energies from the ether and gathered them within me then fed it into my projected thoughts.
“Angels of the ninth sphere, hear me!” I pulsed through the ether to the city below. I felt thousands of minds turn their eyes and their attention towards me. Those inside houses and buildings went outside to stare upwards at the blinding light above. Those on the street stared and pointed excitedly. Those in flight stopped and hovered.
I took a deep breath. “I am Sariel, Archangel of our Lord, Torch Bearer of the Holy Twelve. Heed my words! Verily do I say unto you that the day of reckoning is come! Even now, Lucifer gathers his armies to bring war, massacre, and subjugation to the ninth. He will come with his countless legions and his wrath will be terrible.
“But I tell you now that he will be opposed! I tell you now that I, Sariel, Archangel of our Lord, will stand against him with all my heart, my strength, my will, and my faith! I tell you now that God has not forsaken you. He has gathered each one of you here for a purpose and that purpose is to rise up and stand strong, together, and as one against this tide of evil. Our strength will come from our unity, our faith in God, and our purpose that we will not, cannot, let these fallen triumph! I tell you now that the day of reckoning is come but it will not be our reckoning! Nay, it will be Lucifer’s, and those souls who have cast their lot with him!
“I, Sariel, will stand and fight. Now I ask you, Children of the Most High, who will stand and fight with me?”
Silence fell for what seemed like an eternity before I felt a stir in the masses below. A wave of reverence and exultation swept over me and I was nearly buffeted by the sheer force of it. Thousands raised their voices and shouted their assent. I had not expected such a reaction.
It made me sick to my stomach.
My words had been false. I was Archangel no longer and I didn’t believe God was with us. I hoped for it but I didn’t believe it, not sincerely. Nor did I believe we were chosen for this place and time. All that I knew was that I couldn’t defeat Lucifer alone and I needed help.
I demanded it. I would steal it if I must.
Thousands cheered for me.
Thousands did not. Their hearts were filled with fear. They wanted to believe me, I sensed. They wanted it more than anything.
A part of me was relieved that they didn’t fall for my pretty speech. A part of me told me to let them go their way and spare them their lives.
I ignored that part of myself. I wanted them all.
I closed my eyes once again. I pulled from within myself the proper mix of courage and confidence and filled their minds with the possibilities of a ninth without terror. I sent them images of a land without Lucifer, a land of endless peace and harmony.
I gave them hope.
Many embraced that hope, but many more did not. I felt them bend but not far enough. I had yet to sway them. I needed to give them something more.
I reached deep within myself. I reached so deeply I poured every fiber of my existence into that dream of hope.
To my surprise, I found it to be real.
I envisioned a land without fear where one could live with loved ones eternally. I thought of my life, the happiness I once had, my closeness to God, now lost forever.
I thought of my beloved Requel and her sacrifices for others she didn’t even know. I thought of our son whom Lucifer would rob of any future, any life, to sate his own twisted purpose.
I thought of the wingless, the demons, the deluded fallen, and all those that fell victim to Lucifer’s lies. I thought of the steadfast angels who had fought so hard for what they believed in although it cost them their lives.
Then I thought how wonderful it would have been had they succeeded. I dreamt of a return to a land where God lived in our hearts, our minds, and our lives once again. A land replenished with all the beauty, the marvel, the peace and bliss that was lost.
When I was done, I felt hollow inside as if I were an empty husk. I had given far more of myself than I had intended. Whereas moments ago, this was but a charade to win their hearts, it was now real and I gave them everything instead – all my pain, my mistakes, my regrets, my heartfelt longing, my very soul… I exposed myself completely.
I immediately pulled my feelings back from the minds of the masses. I could not bring myself to feel their emotions again. The thought of any scorn to that which was so real and dear to me made me want to flee. My frail and exposed soul could not bear such rejection.
I would let them go, I decided in that moment. I would let them all go. Who was I to force them on a path not of their choosing? Who was I to steal their hearts for my own selfish purposes and demand they risk their lives?
I dimmed the light from my sword. Night enveloped me. The sun had set behind the mountains long since. How long had I let the masses drink from my soul?
I cringed at the thought.
I stared down at the pinpricks of light winking into existence from the city. I was too ashamed to venture there again. But I must, if only to say goodbye to my wife and son.
I would venture forth to meet Lucifer alone, I decided. I would let no other die for my own selfish cause.
The sound of rushing waters reached my ears. I frowned, puzzled. It took me a moment to realize it was the raised voices of many, many thousands. I did not need to reach out with my senses to know the meaning behind it.
It was an outpouring of love such as I had never felt. It swept over me and carried me like a feather in a breeze.
I had them, I realized. I had them all and I had them completely. Their minds, their hearts, their devotion, and their unity.
My heart wanted to reciprocate their love, their trust. But it couldn’t. It was laden and filled with misery.
I had just killed them all.
CHAPTER THIRTY
I descended from the skies with a heavy heart and made my way back to my chambers within Iobel’s tower. Requel would be there. She alone would understand the burden on my soul.
I opened the door quietly and entered our room. She stood by the single window, the shutters open. She leaned against the sill, our son tucked in her arms. The chanting of my name rumbled from outside.
A mixture of shame, embarrassment, and frailty clung to me like spider webs. Exhaling, and with a trepidation I could not shake, I quietly moved to her side and closed the shutters.
She faced me. Her eyes glistened. So she had heard my pitiful plea, as had everyone else in the city.
“Perhaps too much?” I said, feeling naked. A single word of rebuke from her would undo me.
She shook her head. “It was perfect.” She kissed me and laid her head against my chest.
I kissed her hair and stroked it, wanting to weep. She alone understood me. My embarrassment lessened and strength returned to my limbs, my heart. Her presence, her love, was a healing elixir to my soul.
After a long moment, she looked into my eyes. “Do you think we can win?”
I yearned to say yes. I yearned to say it more than anything. “No.”
She did not cringe or falter. She merely nodded, her gaze never leaving mine. She led me to the bed. I lay next to her, my head propped on one arm, our son asleep between us. I felt her outpouring of love. I hoped she felt mine in return.
Quietly we lay thus, speaking little, enjoying the closeness, the intimacy, the warmth of one another. I had never felt so in love as I did in that moment with my Requel and my little boy. We were together. We were safe. It was a perfect moment, perhaps our last.
I wanted it to last forever.
The night slipped by in a heartbeat and the first rays of the sun seeped through the cracks in the shutters. A thought struck me – perhaps we could have the morning together, perhaps even the whole day, if we simply stayed in our room.
A pounding came from the door.
I froze at the sound. Any sense of peace an
d harmony vanished. The pounding came again.
She moved to rise. “I’ll go see who it is.”
“No, please.” I pulled her back. “Ignore it. They’ll leave soon enough.”
“Sariel?” a muffled voice shouted from the other side of the door. “Are you in there?”
I sat up as I recognized the voice and climbed to my feet. “I’ll go.”
“Do you know who he is?” Requel asked.
“Yes. He’s a friend.”
I strode to the door and opened it. Dirael stood framed in the doorway. His face was haggard and drawn as if he had not slept for days. But his bearing and the gleam in his eyes spoke of a strength I had not seen. He laughed and with a whoop, threw his arms around my neck and hugged me fiercely. I found myself embracing him back and grinning.
“I came straight away, Sariel. I flew through the night. I didn’t dare rest until I saw you!”
“Flew from where, Dirael?”
“It wasn’t just me.” He darted into the room and sped towards the window, flinging the shutters open wide. “Look!”
Frowning, I walked to the window. Thousands of angels filled the bright morning sky. I stared in awe. It had been ages since I’ve seen such a gathering. “What is this?”
“They’ve come from all over. We heard your words and we’re ready to stand with you. We’re here for you, Sariel!”
I shook my head, puzzled. “I don’t understand.”
“Your plea for help. They heard it too,” he said, pointing at the multitudes hovering in the skies. “We all did.”
My eyes widened. “How far away were you?”
“A thousand miles.”
“Holy Father,” I breathed in disbelief.
“I was trying to convince a group of Cherubim to join our cause,” continued Dirael excitedly. “That’s when I heard your voice, felt your thoughts as if they were my own. I felt your dream of peace. We all did. I needed no words to convince them after that. They rose as one and flew straight here.”
My legs buckled and I sat against the sill. A thousand miles? How far had my plea carried? I stared through the window. There were so many.
A hand rested against my shoulder. I looked up. Requel beamed down at me. “Go, beloved. They’re calling for you.”
* * *
I emerged from the door onto the roof of Iobel’s tower. Thousands upon thousands of angels banked and flew in the sky, their bright white wings dancing and flitting like so many snowflakes. I stared in wonder. It was as if I were back in the days before the fall when Michael would gather the hosts in times of celebration.
“I have been a fool, Sariel,” said a voice beside me. I turned. I had not heard Iobel approach.
“How so?”
“Look at them! I have dreamt of this moment, when the angelic orders would stand as one and oppose the fallen. I had lost that dream when last we spoke, I can see that now. Your vision moved me, my friend, and my cowardice shames me. You were right all along. The time for hiding is over. We will confront this abomination once and for all.”
I nodded, saddened. “Very well.”
“Let them know you’re here. Your flock awaits.”
“Not mine, Iobel. They’re yours.”
“Not anymore. You have their loyalty, heart and soul. As you do mine.” He bowed respectfully.
I wanted to vomit.
I strode forward, wanting to tell them to return to their homes, to flee to the higher spheres. This fight cannot be won by those assembled here. It would be like trying to dam a river with a pebble. Instead I raised my hands and reached out with my thoughts.
“I am Sariel, Archangel of our Lord,” I said to each mind. Thunderous cheers erupted in response. “Each one of you gathered here has made a conscious choice to stand against our common foe. Each one of you I call brother or sister, equal in my eyes to any Archangel in the highest heavens. This day will mark the day when we, the righteous, united as one, spoke unto Lucifer in a single voice, ‘No more!’ No more will he take from us our freedoms, our loved ones, and our holy lands. Now say it with me, ‘No More!’” I raised my fist into the air. “No more!”
The chanting boomed across the heavens.
* * *
I stood on the balcony in Iobel’s council chambers, overlooking the city in the early afternoon and the throngs of angels in the skies above. They seemed endless and still they came.
What have I done?
I swallowed hard, fighting back the panic that threatened to overwhelm me. I had made my fight theirs. It troubled me to no end. Guilt weighed me down like an anchor about my neck.
Even this many was pittance against Lucifer’s legions. My selfishness would destroy them.
Was there no limit to the harm I could do? Was there no end to my shame?
“Lord in Heaven, what have I done?” I said aloud to the emptiness.
I exhaled, and closed my eyes. I felt no harmony, no solace in Spirit. Those days were long past. Knowing God’s will escaped me. Indeed, I had failed Him so often I could scarcely determine right from wrong anymore. I felt so hollow inside. So alone.
With all the earnestness in my heart, with all my pathetic strength, I prayed to Lord God for something, anything, that would ease the burden on my soul.
I felt only despair. Had I fallen so far that God would not respond to my forsaken cry? Could I blame him? After all, I knew the stark truth of my plight. God did not abandon me – it was I who abandoned Him. Was it not I who left His side to come to the lower spheres when He told me not to?
Now I set into motion events that put thousands upon thousands of his children in harm’s way. And I would do nothing to stop it.
I clasped my hands together and fell to my knees. “Lord, I know You cannot forgive me,” I prayed deeply. “And I ask nothing of You. I offer something instead, unworthy though I am. I offer You my complete surrender. All is in Your hands now. All that happens from this moment forward is up to You. You know my purpose. You know I will do all that is in my power to stop Lucifer or I will die trying. The outcome is up to You. It always was.”
I climbed unsteadily to my feet and, as I did so, a sense of peace I did not expect settled on me. It calmed me. The peace stemmed from my surrender to God’s will, my acceptance of the inevitable. There was only one way this could end and, to my surprise, the thought of my death did not frighten me.
Any shame or misgivings I harbored faded and hardened into resolve. My course was set. There was no more room for doubt or second thoughts. But I could not shake the guilt and it clung to me.
I turned and walked to the head of the polished table and took my seat. It reminded me of the council chambers so long ago convened in the Causal by my brothers, Michael and Gabriel, on my behalf. I sat in the spot where Michael would have sat. What a poor substitute I made.
The door opened and Iobel and Dirael walked in followed by two others that would make up my war council. I rose to my feet and walked around the table to greet them.
“Sariel, you remember Furmiel, I trust,” said Dirael as he gestured to the stout angel. The grizzled warrior had changed little since I last saw him in Mephistopheles’ fortress.
I reached out and clasped Furmiel’s hand. He took mine warmly. “Well met, Furmiel. I see you’ve risen in the ranks?”
He grinned lopsidedly. “I was there when you beat Mephistopheles. After that, they called me Witness and followed me around and I couldn’t seem to convince them not to. So I was promoted. Fools. I suppose I’m all the more foolish for accepting.”
“And what of Vvael?” I recalled the courageous but reluctant angel. “He was with us as well.”
“Ah, but he’s smarter than I am and ran far, far away.”
“He exaggerates,” said Iobel with a faint grin. “But only partly. I tried to promote him and he threatened to run away if I did. He’s still in the city.”
“Good for him. And who is this?” I asked, turning to the angel I did not recognize.
&nbs
p; “Allow me to introduce Shoel. He is the leader of the Guardian class here in the city.”
I held out my hand. The angel stepped forward and grasped it. He was shorter than Dirael but wider of shoulder. He was armored and appeared capable. “I am honored, my lord.”
“The honor is mine, Shoel.”
“We are waiting on one more to join us then we’ll get started,” said Iobel.
No sooner did we take our seats at the table when a figure walked into the room. “Well, well, I see you’ve finally decided to pay us a visit. It took you long enough,” he said.
“Haniel!” I shouted in disbelief and rose out of my chair. The Seraph was exactly as I remembered. Golden haired, his resplendent white and silver robes seemed to glow. His wings were the gold sparkle of morning sunshine. His pristine blue eyes shone with a depth of spirit I had rarely seen since I left my Causal home.
“It’s good to see you, my old friend,” he said, laughing and clasping me on both shoulders in a warm greeting. Joy filled my heart.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. “Don’t tell me you’re caught up in this mess?”
“Actually, I’m not. I’m here solely as an observer. We Seraphim were told long ago in the Holy City by our illustrious leader, your brother Michael, that we were not to involve ourselves with the conflict in the lower spheres. But lately, when I heard stories of an Archangel that called himself Sariel causing all manner of havoc, I had to come down and see for myself. I brought my two brothers, Jehoel and Zaphiel, with me to examine this most unusual curiosity.”
“I see. So as part of your observation, you’ve been aiding the city and those gathered here?” I asked with a smile.
“My dear Sariel, you wound me,” he said, his eyes twinkling. “As a Seraph, would it not be a dereliction of duty if I did not offer aid when asked by those in need? Besides, I’m of the opinion that the ninth is not part of the lower spheres. Mathematics has not always been my strong point but I’m almost certain that the ninth would be considered the beginning of the upper spheres.”
Heaven's Night Page 27
