The disciple’s eyes widened. “Master, two hundred denarii would not buy enough to feed them all.”
Just then Daniel’s stomach growled and Nathan looked down at the boy.
“Are you hungry?”
“Jesus must be hungry too, sir,” Daniel whispered.
“I’m sure he is, Daniel. We need to find a place to eat our fish and bread, but let’s wait a moment longer. I want to see what Jesus will do.”
Daniel was looking straight at Jesus, who was looking right back at him, a smile playing around his lips. Before Nathan realized what Daniel had in mind, the boy had stepped out of the crowd and was approaching the disciple Jesus had spoken to.
He held out the pouch with their dried fish and bread. “Jesus may have our lunch if he is hungry.”
The smile on the Teacher’s face broadened. “What have we here, Andrew?”
“A boy with some loaves and dried fish, Master.”
Jesus beckoned to Daniel. “Come closer.”
Daniel stepped up next to Jesus, who put an arm around the boy. “Your gift is most welcome, Daniel.”
Daniel gasped. “You know my name?”
Jesus nodded. “You are just in time.” He turned to his disciples. “Have the people sit down in companies of fifty.” Then Jesus took the loaves and fishes and held them up as he looked up to heaven. He blessed the loaves and gave them to his disciples to pass out, then did the same with the fish. The disciples put some of the fish and bread in each of several baskets.
Nathan watched in amazement. While he applauded the boy’s honest offer, there was no way it could feed this vast crowd. Before he could move to retrieve his young helper, a basket was passed to him containing fish and bread. People had been reaching in and taking food from the basket, yet it was still full when it reached Nathan. Startled, he took some bread and fish and passed it on. Everyone was reaching into the baskets and all were finding enough fish and bread for their needs. Nathan wanted to weep and laugh at the same time. The miracle was overwhelming. This teacher was no sorcerer. With sudden clarity, Nathan knew Jesus served the Most High God.
When he had eaten his share of the fish and bread with Daniel, he waited to see if Jesus would continue teaching. Instead Jesus began to walk through the crowd toward the water and a large fishing boat anchored nearby. He touched children on the head as he passed and people reached out to touch his garment, crying out blessings on him.
The disciples followed their master and Nathan suddenly recognized Zebedee’s sons, James and John. They walked protectively around Jesus, but their faces reflected the awe Nathan himself felt. If he had not been here and observed for himself, he wouldn’t have believed what he had seen. Jesus had fed thousands with a boy’s small offering.
The people, their stomachs filled, began to drift in groups back toward the town. Some grumbled about the lateness of the day as they passed Nathan, so soon forgetting what they had seen and heard.
Nathan and Daniel also sought out the local khan, an inn where lodging was provided for strangers at no cost. At least they would have some straw to bed down on.
As they settled for the night in the cubicle assigned to them, Daniel was asleep at once. Nathan listened to the boy’s steady breathing and thought again of the events of the day. Sleep was impossible, for in his head he still heard the words that had been impressed on his mind as Jesus passed by. They were as clear as if Jesus had spoken aloud.
Bring her to me.
22
Mary tossed and turned through the night, calling out for Nathan and her mother, but there was no answer. Then she remembered. Her mother was dead. She would never feel the gentle arms around her and her mother’s voice soothing her. Tears rolled down her cheeks when she remembered she had not even been allowed to follow her mother’s body to the burial site. She had listened to the weeping and wailing of the neighbor women from her room and cried with them.
The voices plagued her again and again as she begged HaShem to stop their torment. In a lucid moment she remembered Keturah and Huldah trying to dress her and how she had fought them. She didn’t want to hurt anyone, but she had no control over some of her actions. Now Nathan had locked her in the room. The forces that ruled her life were strong, and she had beaten herself against the door over and over, but it had remained closed. Her hands were bruised and bloody from pounding on the unyielding barrier.
Eliab had entered cautiously with food for her, but even he had difficulty restraining her. He flung her away when she tried to claw him, and she’d crawled under the table and watched him with wary eyes as he tried to gently speak to her. Finally, he left the bread and fruit and closed the door behind him. She heard the bolt slide into place and whimpered in despair.
Everything she could have used to injure herself had been removed. Even her bed was only a pallet. She had tried to kill herself by placing her own hands on her throat, but it didn’t work. How long was she destined to live in the prison of her mind?
She chewed slowly on a piece of bread, remembering the times she had helped her mother bake bread in the mornings. Heavy wooden bars had been installed on her window after the kidnapping years before, to protect her, but now they only reminded her that she was a prisoner in her own room. She stood at the window looking out at the Sea of Galilee in the distance. She imagined the seagulls crying and the fishing boats along the shore, half of which had been built by her father. Would she ever go down to the sea again?
Then her thoughts turned to Nathan. Beloved Nathan. What kind of wife was she to him now? He refused to divorce her, but every time he tried to come close to her, a voice that didn’t even sound like hers cried out, “Leave me alone! Go away!”
She had seen the sadness on his face, yet his kindness to her had not wavered. Why did he stay? Why did he not leave her? At least, here in her room, she couldn’t hear the snickers and whispers of the neighbors and the words “Mad Mary.”
Nathan had gone somewhere. Eliab told her in a calmer moment when she cried for him. Where had he gone? Had he left her as she had begged him to do so many times?
“He is delivering a boat, mistress. It can take many days.”
Then Eliab had slipped out again.
Hours passed, and as the unease came over her again, she approached the door.
“Eliab, are you there? Let me out, dear Eliab. Please let me out.”
There was no answer, but she knew he was there. He was there—every night and most of the day. He was guarding her. Why did he need to guard her? She was mistress of the house. A sly smile formed on her lips. No, Keturah is mistress now. She bakes the bread and feeds the household. Why was it Keturah and not herself? Because you are mad, her mind told her and she heard the faint laughter. Keturah will take care of Nathan. Mary frowned and shook her fist at the door. No, I’m his wife, not her. Keturah had stolen him from her with her soft words. She had a child. Nathan loved children. Now he would have a son to raise. Her lips trembled and the tears began to flow again. No children. She was a barren wife because of her madness. No children for Nathan.
She sank down on her bed, whimpering and letting self-pity run rampant in her mind. What was she good for? Nothing. Nothing at all.
She lay down and pulled the simple rug over her. Mad Mary. Mad Mary. That’s who she was. She lay staring at the ceiling until at last she fell into an exhausted slumber.
24
Nathan ran his hands along the rail of the new boat, feeling its smoothness. This one was going to a young fisherman in Tiberias; it had been paid for by the father to set his son up in business. The father raised sheep and goats, but the boy loved the sea. As Nathan studied the structure of the boat, he remembered his own joy as he sailed out on the blue waters, even just to deliver a boat. He had once been an apprentice like Daniel, but now, thanks to Jared, he owned half of the business.
Deep in thought, Nathan was unaware of Amos until the young man was standing next to him, speaking his name. Amos had become a friend when t
hey worked together, and even though Nathan was now half-owner and his employer, it had not affected their friendship. Amos was one who had sought news of the Teacher.
“You are miles away in your thoughts, my friend.”
Nathan turned and smiled. “That is true. What news do you have for me?” He was aware stories were running rampant through Magdala of the amazing rabbi who could merely touch sick people and they were healed. Never before had there been a leader so powerful that demon spirits fled before him. Neighbor whispered to neighbor of the lame healed and the blind eyes opened. Nathan had watched and listened, considering what would be his best opportunity to bring Mary to Jesus. Word came that Jesus was in Gennesaret, and Nathan wanted to see where the Teacher would go from there.
Amos shrugged. “He travels through much territory. I know this. He angers the scribes and Pharisees. They do not understand him. He breaks tradition. They follow him and condemn his actions, in spite of the miracles he does. The Teacher called them hypocrites, for they honor God with their lips but their hearts are far from him.”
“He has courage, I’ll say that.”
“Courage or he’s foolhardy. He is up against powerful leaders.”
“More powerful than the Most High?”
Amos was thoughtful. “True. If he is indeed the Messiah, they would be protesting against God.”
Nathan pulled on his beard and looked out again toward the sea. “Do you know where the Teacher is headed from Gennesaret?”
“My sources say he is moving in the direction of Tyre and Sidon.”
Nathan’s heart sank. That was far from Magdala.
Seeing the sadness on Nathan’s face, Amos clapped him on the shoulder. “His home is in Capernaum. Surely he will return there soon. Take heart, my friend. There will be the right time.”
“That is the hope I cling to, every day.”
The two men were silent, each with their own thoughts, and finally Nathan shook himself mentally. “We have work to do. The new load of pitch will be delivered this afternoon. Tell the men to prepare the buckets.”
Nathan watched Amos stride away. It was good to have a friend to count on who knew what he was seeking to do. He turned toward the stone building that served as the business center for the yard. Zerah had entered the boatyard a short time ago and gone in to talk to Beriah. Whatever Zerah was up to was usually not good.
As Nathan approached the building, he heard laughter. Was he hearing things? Zerah, laughing with his father? Puzzled, he entered and found his father smiling up at Zerah from the low table where the scrolls were laid out for accounting.
“Nathan, my son. Come and join us.”
He approached, frowning, his mind full of questions.
Zerah came forward. “We were discussing an encounter I had with a Roman soldier while you were gone.”
“You are lucky you escaped. They do not handle encounters with our people well.”
“Ah, this one was drunk.” Zered smiled broadly. “Fortunately, he was more drunk than I, but it caused me to think about some things. I have been too harsh with you. For a successful business, we must work together.”
Nathan stared at his partner, eyebrows raised.
“I am a changed man, Nathan. HaShem spared my life and there was no reason for him to do so. I was unworthy of his mercy.”
Did he see tears in the eyes of this man who had been so harsh and unfeeling? Zerah’s countenance was indeed changed, softened. In his heart Nathan realized the man was telling the truth.
“I am glad to hear that. I have need of your advice and there is work enough to benefit us both.”
Wine was poured all around and they drank to Zerah and the future.
Daniel burst into the yard running toward them and, spying Nathan, made straight for him. “Sir, I have news.”
The men crowded around him.
Nathan gave the boy a chance to catch his breath. “What is it, Daniel?”
“The Teacher. Remember when we saw him feed the crowd in Bethsaida?”
“Yes, over five thousand by my estimate.”
“He did it again. Some say there were more than four thousand this time, on the mountain near Capernaum.”
“Capernaum? He is heading this way?”
Daniel beamed. “HaShem has heard our prayers, sir. The Teacher crossed the Sea near here and has landed in our region.”
Here. Jesus was coming here. Nathan’s heart raced with excitement. “Then he will come to the city.” He pressed a coin into Daniel’s hand. “Go and let me know exactly where the Teacher is. Go quickly.”
Daniel grinned, nodded, and clutching the coin, raced off again.
Zerah had watched this all with his eyes wide and, when the boy was gone, turned to Nathan. “What is this the boy is talking about? The Teacher coming here? Do you mean the Jesus I’ve been hearing about?”
“Yes. He lays hands on the sick and they recover. He has even cast demons out of those afflicted—”
“And you are thinking of Mary?”
Nathan spread his hands. “What other hope do I have for her?”
“Then I will help you. She is my niece and I wish to see her well also. If Jesus comes to Magdala, I will do whatever I can to bring him to her.”
“Thank you, Zerah, your kind words mean a great deal to me at this time.”
Nathan returned home in high spirits and told Eliab of Daniel’s news. A slow smile spread on the dark, wrinkled face of their servant. “It is time then. I have felt it. I must be on my way to my home, but not yet. I will wait.”
“I understand, Eliab.” He stood for a moment, noticing there was silence from Mary’s room. “How is Mary?”
“She sleeps now, but do not let the silence fool you. If you enter the room, she will awake and try to attack you. The evil one gives her great strength.”
“But not for long, Eliab, not for long.”
Nathan went to see what Huldah had left for their evening meal. He hated eating alone, and since no one else was around, he convinced Eliab to join him. The servant was reluctant, even after so many years, but gingerly eased himself down at the table. When he saw how it lifted Nathan’s spirits, he relaxed and dipped his bread in the stew.
As Nathan ate, his mind turned and the two men discussed all the possibilities.
“There will be a way, young master. Your God will show you the way.”
Nathan looked at him and said earnestly, “If you saw the miracles he did, and listened to him speak, he would be your God too, Eliab.”
Eliab’s face was passive, but the dark eyes looking back at him held a fire. “The young mistress will be healed and then I will return home.”
Nathan laughed softly. “I could use your confidence, my friend.” Whatever happened, they would get Mary to Jesus if they had to carry her kicking and screaming. He sighed. That might just be what they had to do.
As if reading his thoughts, Eliab nodded. The two men finished their meal. There was nothing to do now but wait.
25
Nathan was aware of a low buzz of excitement stirring through the neighborhoods of Magdala. Word came to him that people were flocking out to the hills where this rabbi named Jesus was teaching. Pushing, shoving, hurrying to be the ones closest to see, they came for the excitement—to see the miracles Jesus performed. Like a sea of hungry children, they murmured among themselves and stretched their necks to watch what the Teacher would do next. Those who were closest passed the word to those behind as the sick were brought and healed. Samuel and Huldah went to hear Jesus and came back changed. They believed he was from God.
That evening, Zerah came to the house and he, Nathan, and Eliab discussed how they might get Mary through the crowds.
Mary’s uncle raised his eyebrows when Eliab slowly came to stand near them. Then with a shrug, he went on dipping his bread in the warm goat meat stew. He chewed thoughtfully as he listened to Nathan’s ideas. Eliab hung back, puzzled, his dark eyes upon the two men. Nathan motioned fo
r him to join them.
“Eliab has been part of the family for many years. He is not a slave.” Nathan knew the old Zerah would have angrily objected. The new Zerah merely nodded and went on eating. Nathan raised his eyebrows at Eliab. In one fluid movement, Eliab sat down beside Nathan and reached for a chunk of warm bread, and for the first time in a long time, Nathan saw Eliab smile.
Nathan, almost too excited to eat, had an idea. He set his cup of wine down on the low table. “What if we put her in a cart?”
Zerah shook his head. “A thought, my friend, but not practical. She could easily climb out and be lost in the crowd. What if we tied a rope around her waist?”
Nathan snorted. “And lead her like a goat?”
Eliab listened to the various suggestions and finally spoke up. “If two were at her side, holding her arms, and I was behind her, could we not guide her to the Teacher?”
“Like a human wall around her?” Nathan nodded. “That might work, Eliab.”
Eliab gathered some grapes, cheese, and bread dipped in the stew from the table and put them on a platter. “She is hungry,” he said simply, and turned toward the house.
Nathan watched him go. “He has a way with her. She lets him in and has not attacked him.” He hung his head. “Such is not the same with me. Why?”
Zerah shook his head slowly. “It is the ones closest to us that the enemy would devastate. She loves you, but the enemy will not let you near her, and that is torture to her soul and to yours.”
He was right, and Nathan knew it, yet now there was hope. His heart burned with the expectancy that something was going to happen that could change their lives. He didn’t know when or how, but he clung to that hope with all his being.
“Stay the night, Zerah. The Teacher is close. Tomorrow is our best opportunity while the Teacher is as close as he will get to us.”
Zerah nodded. “I will stay. Let us both think on what we can do. HaShem will show us the way.”
Mary Magdalene Page 10
