“Easy for you to say,” she muttered, wrenching her gaze from his. “You don’t understand.”
“I do. I was there for my mother. I do understand. I just don’t believe that worrying solves anything.”
“Have you ever been in my position, waiting to know the outcome of a biopsy that has you terrified?” she demanded, her voice rising at each word she uttered.
“No. I haven’t. I understand you’re upset and need time to figure this all out.”
“Meaning?”
“Think positive. Don’t worry so much,” he said soothingly, running his fingers along her cheek, which would have made her want him even more if he wasn’t being so insensitive.
She couldn’t cope with her feelings for him and her fear of the biopsy tomorrow all at the same time. She had never felt this confused and mixed-up and scared in her entire life. “It’s been a long day, and I have to be at the hospital early tomorrow for my procedure. I’d like you to go.”
His fingers stilled. A slight frown formed between his electrifying eyes. “Got it,” he said.
She heard disappointment in his voice. But what had he expected? That they’d have sex? That her worry wouldn’t affect the evening? And to think she’d been enjoying her time with him only a few minutes earlier.
She followed him out to the door, admonishing herself for wishing he’d pull her into his arms. Rory was all about Rory, about not getting close enough to support her in the way she needed.
When he got to the door, he turned. “Thank you. I had a great evening.”
Did he really have a great evening, even after she’d told him about her biopsy? “You’re welcome. Thanks for helping with dinner.” She stood perfectly still, waiting for him to leave, wanting him to say something that would make her feel better.
“Next time we’ll do it at my place,” he said.
Before she could respond, he opened the door, walked out to his truck and drove away. She couldn’t believe it. Was she right? Was he running away from her because of her health scare? Had he decided that since she hadn’t invited him to stay the night that he would look elsewhere for female company? After all, it was still early.
Yet he’d been so attentive, so much fun. Or was it all just part of his charm where women were concerned? Could it be that he was simply a charming man who avoided any involvement in a difficult situation such as hers?
CHAPTER FIVE
BILL CASSIDY STARED across his living room at the private detective he’d hired weeks ago. Nate Garrison, a police officer who now worked for community policing, had recommended Peter Leighton as a good person to investigate Bill’s suspicions around Peggy Anderson.
Shortly after she moved to Eden Harbor, he’d met Peggy in the high school, looking at the group photos of the graduates that hung in the halls. Curious, he’d asked her what she was doing. She hedged for a few moments before asking him if he knew which year Ellen Donnelly had graduated and if her photo was here.
He’d been surprised at her question. He hadn’t thought that anyone was interested in Ellen, certainly not anyone he knew in Eden Harbor. And yet this young woman had taken the time to come to the school to find her photo. When he’d asked her why, she’d dropped her gaze and didn’t answer. Having had a difficult day with a couple of his best basketball players and a championship game looming, he’d been very short with her. Rude, in fact. She hadn’t brought the topic up to him again, even though she’d been a regular member of the women’s volleyball team in town for the past year.
From the first practice when Peggy arrived on the volleyball court, there had been something so familiar about her. Because of her skill and her willingness to learn more about the game, they’d formed a close bond. He’d been giving her a little extra instruction on her play around the net when he spotted a birthmark that looked just like Ellen Donnelly’s birthmark. Yet because of his antagonism over Ellen, he’d let it go. Lots of people probably had similar birthmarks. And besides, Peggy Anderson hadn’t said anything about why she was interested in Ellen. But as the months rolled on and he continued to coach every Wednesday night, he’d become determined to satisfy his curiosity about her, which meant that he needed to find a way to go about his inquiry without letting anyone know.
He and Ellen had been in love in high school and had planned to marry. Or so he believed. Until the day he’d come home from college in Bangor to find she’d left Eden Harbor without saying a word to him. He’d tried to locate her, but all her parents would say was that she’d left to live in Boston with relatives. When he’d learned that wasn’t true, he’d been so angry he’d let the whole thing drop. If Ellen didn’t want to see him again, he would accept that.
Call it an aging man’s need to connect with some element of his past, but he couldn’t help wondering if Peggy was related to Ellen. Was Ellen her aunt? Was that why she’d moved to Eden Harbor? None of Ellen’s family lived here anymore, but maybe Peggy simply wanted to live by the ocean. But the birthmark was just like Ellen’s, and he hadn’t been able to quiet the suspicion that maybe Peggy was Ellen’s daughter. Yet his idea seemed so far-fetched he hadn’t dared to share it with anyone. That’s why he’d hired Peter Leighton to investigate for him.
Ellen Donnelly had been someone he couldn’t forget, and if this was her daughter... “So, what do you have to tell me?” he asked.
Peter opened his file and handed Bill a photo of Peggy Anderson, taken a few years ago. “I got this photo off her high school site in Seattle. Peggy is the daughter of Ellen and Marcus Anderson. Her father was a chemical engineer for one of the big oil companies and has worked all over the world. Peggy has lived on virtually every continent, ending up in Seattle her last year in high school. She was in the top ten of her class, excelled at sports and was very popular. She trained to be a phlebotomist at the hospital and worked there for a few years. One day about two years ago, she left and moved to Eden Harbor. The friends of hers that I interviewed said that she decided very suddenly to leave Seattle after her father passed away. Two of her high school friends are still in touch with her, and one suggested that Peggy had had a falling-out with her mother over something. They didn’t know what.”
“And her mother? Could you find anything on her?”
“Well, that’s the interesting part. As best as I could determine, Ellen Donnelly Anderson left Eden Harbor—”
Bill’s sudden intake of breath was audible over the detective’s voice. Peter Leighton looked up from his report, surprise evident on his face.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt. Go on.”
“Ellen Donnelly left Eden Harbor. I had a hard time locating where she went after that. There was no record of her in Boston, so I searched for Marcus Anderson. I discovered a marriage record in Virginia Beach. Marcus Anderson married Ellen Donnelly October 15, 1986. There is a birth record also of their daughter, Peggy Mae Anderson, born December 10, 1987. Marcus is on the birth record as the father.”
Bill did a quick calculation. Marcus was certainly not Peggy’s father. Ellen hadn’t left Eden Harbor until September, just after he started his last year of college. Peggy had to be his daughter. Anger burned through him at Ellen’s callous behavior. He had a right to know that he’d fathered a daughter. He had a right to be her father, to be aware that she existed and the chance to know her.
Instead, the woman he loved had gone off and married a man she hardly knew. Had Ellen done it simply to give her child a name? Or had she loved Marcus Anderson? Bill didn’t believe in love at first sight, but maybe it happened. Who was he to know? He’d only ever loved Ellen, and that hadn’t gone well at all. Now, he had proof that she hadn’t loved him nearly as much as she’d pretended. Her lack of caring had left him out of his daughter’s life completely.
He’d waited for twenty-nine years to hear from Ellen, but now he didn’t care if he ever heard from her. A woman who would hurt another person like she had didn’t deserve anyone’s love or respect.
But P
eggy was a different story. He wanted to get to know her, to tell her about her past...that she was his daughter. But how would she react to the news? Bill sighed. Peggy had lived here two years. She had to have known that her mother grew up here when she moved here. Had that been her motivation for coming here? And if so, how had she not known about him? Surely someone would have mentioned something to her.
“That’s the basic facts of my investigation,” Peter Leighton said.
The basic facts that told him the raw truth about the woman he’d loved.
So much for love.
He balled his fingers into fists. “That’s very helpful. I’d like to settle what I owe you.”
The investigator passed an invoice to him. Bill got out his checkbook and wrote out the check, his attention wavering as his thoughts raced. He had a daughter who was twenty-nine years old, a phlebotomist, owned a small horse farm and played volleyball. That’s all he knew about her. He intended to find out more. What her interests were and what mattered to her in life. Had she found someone to love? There had not been anyone waiting for her after their weekly practices or any of the games as far as he could remember.
“Thank you for your business,” Peter Leighton said, breaking into Bill’s thoughts.
“Thank you. You did a good job, and I appreciate it.”
After the investigator left, Bill sat for a long time, remembering how much he’d once loved Peggy’s mother. He couldn’t think of Ellen as anything else but a mother. She sure as hell wasn’t the woman he’d loved. That woman would never have kept his daughter from him. One thing was certain. He would not let this rest until he knew the whole truth. If Peggy was his daughter, he wanted to be part of her life. He ran his fingers over the file and then suddenly opened it to the page with the contact information for Ellen Anderson.
* * *
THE NEXT MORNING Peggy was up early well before her appointment with Dr. Brandon. Gayle had insisted on picking her up and taking her to the hospital for her biopsy. When she pulled into her driveway, Peggy was ready to go. “Good morning,” she said as she climbed in beside Gayle.
“To you, too. How did you sleep?” Gayle asked, turning the car around and going down the driveway.
“I didn’t. When I did I had this really strange dream about my mother calling to me from across a wide room, but I couldn’t make out what she was saying.”
“Ah, honey, you’re missing your mom.”
Without warning, Peggy’s eyes stung with tears. She glanced out the window while she let the wave of loneliness pass. “I’ve never faced any type of surgery without my mom there for me.” She took a deep breath, focusing her attention on the road ahead. “But I’m not a child anymore. I can go through a simple procedure like a biopsy without her being there.”
“But this kind of biopsy?” Gayle asked, her voice gentle as she eased up to a stop sign.
Peggy swallowed against her fear. “I know it’s crazy, but I swear I could feel something this morning when I showered.” Peggy smoothed her hair from her face and wiped the tears perched on her cheeks.
“You’re going to be fine. You know that, don’t you?”
Peggy loved that Gayle was so upbeat, but Gayle didn’t know of her mother’s history with breast cancer. Peggy had never felt the need to talk about her mother very much, much less about her breast cancer. Peggy worried the rest of the drive leading to Eagle Mountain Medical Center.
“Have you heard from Rory?” Gayle asked as they drove into the parking lot.
“He dropped by yesterday.”
“And?”
“He stayed for dinner.”
“Wow. You never have a guy stay for dinner. Is there something you’re not telling me?”
“He arrived unexpectedly. I was feeling pretty awful about my doctor’s appointment. He seemed really nice, very upbeat. I needed that.”
“And?”
“Turned out he was way too upbeat for me. I decided to tell him about my procedure today. He acted like it was no big deal.”
“A good-time-only kind of guy.”
“I guess. Doesn’t matter, though. When I wasn’t all gushy about him hanging around, he left rather abruptly.”
“You are one tough lady when it comes to the men in your life. Do you suppose anyone will ever measure up?”
“What are you saying?” Peggy asked, surprised by Gayle’s comment.
“I mean you expect every man to be perfect like your father. Trust me when I tell you that no man is perfect. Nor is any woman, for that matter.”
Peggy pursed her lips. “I think he’s hiding something.”
“What?” Gayle’s eyes swerved from the road to Peggy and back again.
“I...I’m not sure. It’s just that he’s so self-contained. Whenever you ask him anything he doesn’t want to answer, he turns the conversation back on you. If there’s anything unpleasant or unhappy, he makes light of it. If you ask me, he has some hidden flaw that makes him seem...removed from the normal problems of life.”
“Nice to know, Dr. Peggy,” Gayle teased as she slowed to turn into the hospital parking lot.
They went into the building together to the outpatient check-in. “This is where I leave you,” Gayle said. “Good luck. I’ll pick you up when they discharge you.”
“I really appreciate this. Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
Peggy was shown to a cubicle where she was instructed on what she needed to do. She was told the doctor was on time and everything would be fine. Peggy really wanted to believe that. She wasn’t worried about the procedure itself. She was terrified of the possible results.
The biopsy barely hurt at all, and before she knew it, she was back in her cubicle and ready to go home. Sherri and Gayle arrived together when it was time for her to leave. “So?” Sherri asked.
“Your husband is such a kind doctor, and he made me feel confident that everything would be okay.”
“I’ll tell him that,” Sherri said with pride as she very gently hugged Peggy. “Now all you have to do is enjoy the ride home.”
Peggy wished it were that simple. She was really worried, given her mother’s history, and wished for the second time that morning she could call her. But calling her mom meant being willing to talk about their argument, admitting she’d been wrong to be so upset over learning her dad wasn’t her biological father; that she wasn’t angry with her mom for not telling her the name of her biological father. If she called her mom, they’d have to go back over all these issues, and Peggy couldn’t do that. She couldn’t forgive her mother for not telling her the truth no matter how hard she tried. She needed her mother right now, but getting in touch with her was more than she could handle at the moment. She felt a slow rise of anger.
As she looked from Gayle to Sherri, she realized that although she’d come here searching for her mother’s family, she did have a family of friends. Two women who were more like sisters. “You two are the best friends I could ever ask for.”
They laughed as they linked arms and walked to the clinic entrance.
Gayle drove her home, with the promise to come back and feed the horses for her. Peggy was sure she’d be okay to do it, but it was a lovely gesture. As she entered her house, her thoughts returned to her mother and father.
When Peggy decided to move from Seattle, she’d looked at the lot of properties on the internet but really focused her search on Eden Harbor, where her mother grew up. Whoever her father was, he might have a connection to the place.
If he wasn’t somewhere in or around Eden Harbor, where was he? Why hadn’t he come looking for her years ago? And what if she needed information on him in a health crisis of some sort?
She changed her clothes, donned sweats and a plaid shirt she’d kept of her father’s and settled in to read on the sofa for a while. Even though she felt relaxed and the book she was reading was soothing, she couldn’t seem to sleep despite the mild sedative she’d been given before the procedure.
She touched the small dressing over the incision and once again thought of her mother. Taking a breath, she reached for the phone to call her. As her fingers rested on the keypad, she couldn’t decide what to do. Calling her mother meant listening to her plea that Peggy come to Seattle, that they needed to be together. Her mother would insist that cancer care was better in Seattle...on and on. Yet it might be really helpful to hear more about the circumstances around her mother’s cancer. All Peggy could remember of it was that she’d found a lump that they referred to as encapsulated and removed it.
Her thoughts on her past and her parents’ behavior, she didn’t hear the back door open, only the sudden knocking.
“Anybody home?” a now-familiar voice asked.
“Rory, what are you doing here?”
He stepped inside the door, closing it behind him. “I came by to see if you’re okay.”
He was the last person she expected to see today. “I’m fine. Gayle drove me in and brought me back home.”
“I know. I stopped by and asked her about you.”
“You did?” Despite his kindness, she was reminded of last night and his dismissive attitude toward her situation.
“I also brought a couple of sandwiches from the deli downtown if you’re hungry,” he said, giving her a wide smile.
She looked up into his handsome face, the reassurance in his eyes, and was suddenly so relieved that he was with her. “I’m famished.”
“I’ll be right back,” he said, going out to his truck and returning with a bulging bag.
“That looks like more than sandwiches,” she said, watching him move into her kitchen as he placed the bag on the counter.
“It is. Salad included. Which do you want, pastrami on rye or ham with Swiss cheese?”
“Ham,” she said, reaching with her left arm to get two plates out of the cupboard. “Cola or water?”
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