“First you’d better remove those shoes of yours. Not really beachwear.”
“I see your point,” she said, kicking them off and leaving them on the deck near the stairs.
They went down the stairs onto the sand, linked hands and began their walk toward the shaft of moonlight playing on the water. “This is so awesome,” she said as they strolled together, moving slowly now, feeling the cool breeze off the water. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a beautiful sight. The coastline near Seattle is pretty nice, but this place...”
Eager to show her more of the beach, he pulled her along. When he got near the spot where he knew there was a dip in the sand hiding them from the restaurant, he stopped. “This place is one of the reasons I couldn’t live anywhere else but Maine. I couldn’t leave this place for Texas.” Unable to resist her nearness, he put his arm around her shoulder.
“I could stand here forever, just like this, just the two of us,” he said, startled by the rush of emotion his words had created in him. He’d meant every one of them. That was the really scary part. He meant them.
“So exactly how many women have you brought here on a date?” she asked, looking up into his eyes.
“Truth?” he asked, wanting this moment to last.
“Of course.”
Her upturned face glowed in the moonlight. The warmth of her smile blocked all rational thought. “None...until now.”
“I’m flattered.”
“You should be. I have plans to start picking women up off the street and bringing them here any day now,” he said, keeping the mood light.
She chuckled, a wonderfully melodious sound. “You have an answer for everything.”
“Ah, that’s where you’re wrong,” he said, shifting his gaze to the shoreline, watching the dark water roil and roar over the stones along the edge. “If I had the answer to everything, I’d know what you were thinking.”
“That’s easy. I’m thinking I haven’t had such an enjoyable evening in a long time.”
“My pleasure,” he said, pulling her close again. He tipped her chin up and kissed her, slowly at first, tasting, waiting...
She slid her hands up over his chest, around his neck, her body capturing his. He held her and kissed her, his body hard against hers. He held her tighter, his need for her growing stronger.
Her breath came in short gasps. With her body pressed to his, she whispered, “Make love to me.”
He almost began to unbutton her top, only to have a thought invade his mind. Peggy wasn’t the kind of person who went in for casual sex. She’d said as much. If she really wanted him to make love to her, it would mean something special, some sort of commitment, that, however fleeting at first, could turn into more than he was ready for. Yet he couldn’t help but want this. Now was all that mattered. Besides, his fingers were doing his thinking for him as they began a slow caress of her body.
She leaned into him, her breath coming quickly, hot against his neck. She looked up into his face, her eyes dark, her lips parted. “Is this what you want?” he whispered, drawing her closer.
“Yes.”
* * *
PEGGY KNEW THIS was crazy—they were on the beach, mere yards from the restaurant—but she didn’t care. Yet when she thought of the incision on her breast, she cringed and pulled back. Would it be too much reality for him? “I’m just a little anxious.” She let her arms come to rest against his chest, easing his hands away from her. Pushing a man as warm and sexy as Rory away was the last thing she’d ever imagined doing.
“Oh! I’m sorry! Did I hurt you?” he asked, stepping back.
“No. Really.”
He opened his arms. “Then come here. I want to hold you.” He caressed her arms, making them tingle. His hands cupped her shoulders as he pulled her closer, his lips touching hers in a gentle kiss that made her head swim.
She moved into his arms once more, her fingers working up his muscled chest. “I haven’t been with a man for a very long time,” she said, her body trembling with excitement.
He pulled her closer and picked her up in his arms. “One evening when I was down on this beach, I found a great spot just a little farther along.” He smiled down into her face, his eyes dark, his body hugging hers. “And, no, I wasn’t here with another woman.”
“Thanks for that. Your confession of not womanizing put my mind at ease,” she said, intentionally aiming for a light tone while her body ached with need.
He carried her down the beach to the spot and eased her down along his body until she was standing on the cool sand. “I’ve never known anyone like you,” he said, his hands working their magic through her hair, massaging her skin as his lips found hers again. With one easy movement, he slid to the ground, pulling her with him as he deepened the kiss.
With a deep groan of pleasure, she wrapped her arms around his neck and returned his kiss, her lips parted, her tongue tangling with his.
“I want you,” he said, his voice a rasp as his hands explored her body. She was excited, anxious and eager. She wanted him, too. More than anyone she’d ever been with. Suddenly she didn’t care about anything other than this man.
Out of nowhere laughter rang out. Voices competed with each other under the light of the moon. Embarrassment flooded down her body like a bucket of cold water. “We have company,” she moaned, her heart skipping several beats.
Rory pulled her close, nestled her next to him, his grip solid and reassuring. “It would seem we do.” He waved at the two couples laughing their way up the beach to where they lay semi-sprawled in the sand. “Nice evening.”
The four people hooted. “It is. Looks like you two are making the best of it,” one of the men said. As they drew abreast of where Peggy and Rory now sat, one of the men leaned toward them. “Well, hello, Peggy. Nice to see you somewhere other than at the blood lab.”
Peggy stared up into the man’s face. “Peter Sherwood.”
“That it is.” He continued to stare, and Peggy knew beyond a shadow of any doubt that the minute he got back to his house he would tell his mother, Lisa Sherwood, that he’d seen her here. The woman believed she had something going on with Bill Cassidy, and now she’d have more gossip to share. Peter waited for her to introduce Rory, but she pretended not to understand his knowing glance.
As they moved away, Peggy eased out of Rory’s embrace and hugged her knees, watching the foursome meander along the beach toward the restaurant. “You’ll be the subject of gossip before midnight.”
“What?”
“That was Ned Tompkins’s nephew, also known as Lisa Sherwood’s son. She is always minding other people’s business. Now she’ll be minding yours.”
“Couldn’t care less,” he said, pulling her back toward him, obviously intent on continuing where they’d left off.
“I care.”
“Why?” he asked, his hands beginning their slow slide around her knees.
She tucked her legs under her and stood up, all in one anxious movement. “Because I plan to live here, maybe even grow old here, with people who love and care about me,” she said. “I want to go home.”
“Are you all right?” he asked, standing up and pulling her hand into his.
“Those people...” She stopped. What could she say that wouldn’t sound stupid?
“Hey. Come on. We were going to have a little fun, just the two of us. We can go back to your place...or mine. Although yours is probably cleaner and neater.”
“Be serious for once!” she said, stepping out of his reach.
“I am. I want to make love to you.”
And then what? She wanted to ask, but couldn’t bring herself to push him on it. “I’m not in the mood for a fling with someone like you. Coming down here to the beach was a mistake.”
“You really think that all I care about where you’re concerned is having sex with you?”
“I honestly don’t know,” she said, searching his face in the moonlight.
“How many ways can I
prove it to you? I care about you. No, I can’t read the future, but I would like us to have one.”
“So am I to assume this isn’t casual sex?”
“Hold on. Let’s not start labeling things just yet.” He grimaced. “When it comes to women, I never seem to be able to say it right.”
“Say what right?”
“I want to be with you tonight. But I can’t make a commitment to you. Not tonight for sure, and maybe not for a while, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy one another whenever the mood strikes us.”
“Is that your impetuous self talking?”
“Maybe.”
“And you think I want to weld a ring to your finger before we have sex, is that it?” She was suddenly so mad she could spit.
“Come on. That’s not fair. I never said that.”
“What’s not fair is for you to make me feel like less of a woman than I already feel. Have you forgotten what’s going on with me?”
Even in the subdued light on the beach the shock on his face was evident. He reached for her, folding her against his chest. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I would never make you feel that way. You’re the most gorgeous, sexy woman I’ve ever met. I... I would never hurt you.”
His fingers gently massaging her back was such a turn-on she wanted to wrap her body around his. But he clearly saw tonight differently than she did, which meant that she’d been right to call a halt to things. “Maybe next time? Another moonlit evening?” she asked, hearing the hope in her voice and wishing she could block it. Showing feelings for another person, feelings that weren’t reciprocated, was an exercise in embarrassment.
The silence between them was unnerving. Why didn’t he say something? She supposed she could come up with some sort of face-saving statement, but she suddenly didn’t feel like doing anything but going home. “Let’s call it a night,” she said, escaping his embrace and striding up the beach. Rattled, upset and a little humiliated, she turned back to him. “Either you can drive me home or give me your keys.”
He caught up to her. “You can drive a truck, I assume.”
“I can drive anything,” she said.
CHAPTER SIX
RORY HAD SPENT the night wanting to bang his head into the wall. He settled for spending several sleepless hours on why he’d behaved the way he had during last night’s date. It started with his unwillingness to share with Peggy the reasons why he wasn’t prepared to talk about his experiences in Haiti. Guilt. Guilt stopped him from talking to anyone about his feelings over his time in Haiti.
He’d grown to love the people he’d met there, their enthusiasm for life in spite of overwhelming problems. He felt guilty that he had so much while they had so little. He felt guilty that he couldn’t cope as well as they could, that a part of him feared that he couldn’t truly commit to life there, and guilty that he was so happy and relieved to have escaped.
Yet a part of him desperately needed to return, to make amends to feel alive the way working in Haiti had made him feel. The other part of why he couldn’t go further with Peggy, couldn’t bring himself to take what happened on the beach to its natural conclusion, was his fear that she might read more into a night together than he was ready for. For some reason, he couldn’t share his feelings about Haiti and, until he could, he felt trapped between his feelings for her and his sense of loss over leaving Haiti, especially the two orphaned children he’d been powerless to help.
How could he explain what happened to him there when he didn’t understand it himself? Yet if he loved Peggy, as he was beginning to think he could, he should be able to talk to her about something that mattered a great deal to him. He didn’t have any trouble flirting with her, being with her. So what was the matter with him?
He suddenly realized that his long-ago relationship with a woman he thought he’d been in love with couldn’t compare to his feelings for Peggy. Yet there were similarities that he couldn’t deny. He’d almost married the daughter of his mother’s best friend. They’d dated in high school. She wanted to settle in Bangor without experiencing anything life had to offer outside Maine, while he wanted to be an astronaut. He’d failed college, but it hadn’t changed his belief that there was a whole world waiting to be explored. He’d been working as a carpenter in Bangor when he met Grant Williams. He’d been sitting in a coffee shop on his laptop when Grant sat down across from him. They struck up a conversation, discovered that they both worked in construction, only Grant’s work involved helping others, something that appealed to Rory. When he’d gotten to Haiti and saw how much he was needed, it was as if he hadn’t lived before.
He’d returned, believing that his life in Haiti was over. He wanted Haiti to be over because he felt torn between his life there and living a familiar, predicable life at home. But the longer he was back in the United States, the more he realized how he needed to go back. As much as he enjoyed his life here in Eden Harbor, he couldn’t give up his dream of making a difference in a place like Haiti. He’d felt exhilarated, essential and so involved there. And he couldn’t seem to stop feeling that he’d abandoned them, that he had to go back. So far he hadn’t found a woman who understood those feelings or wanted to be a part of his search for personal fulfillment.
As he finished his coffee and headed out of his apartment to his truck and his workday, he felt a deep sense of having messed up the one relationship that mattered to him. He didn’t know what to do next, but he did have to get to his appointment at the clinic with Dr. Brandon.
Once across town, he drove along the road leading to the clinic that was attached to Eagle Mountain Medical Center. The air was scrubbed clean of any last remnants of fog, the sky seemed bluer today and the trees greener. He loved the pines, the spruce and the maple trees that lined the road, spreading up over the hills that climbed toward the sky. Yeah, he’d picked the right place, he thought as he pulled into the parking lot, got out of his truck and strode toward the entrance.
Once inside, he was tempted to stop by and see Peggy. So tempted he almost turned left toward her department rather than right toward the clinics. Yet he was well aware that until he’d come to terms with his feelings, his worries and his indecision, he had no right to involve her. If Haiti was part of his future, she needed to know that. Asking someone to make that kind of commitment in a relationship was huge.
A few minutes later he checked in at the clinic desk and was immediately escorted into the treatment room. He hadn’t seen either Gayle Sawyer or Sherri Brandon when he arrived, which was probably just as well. Peggy had almost certainly told them about last night.
In a matter of minutes, Neill Brandon appeared. “Good morning. Your blood work came back. All the tests were within normal limits. No worries there. How’s your arm?” he asked, motioning for him to sit up while he washed his hands before opening the suture removal tray.
“It seems to be fine. I put a fresh dressing on it each day, cleaned up the incision like the nurse told me to do. Not too much blood.”
“I take it you’re not crazy about the sight of blood.”
“You could say that,” Rory answered, remembering the day he’d been here getting stitches and how he’d felt. He wouldn’t forget that day.
Neill approached him with a disposable sheet and put it under his arm on the table. “This won’t take long,” he said, removing the bandage and checking the site.
“Did you enjoy the fund-raiser the other night?” Neill asked as he began removing the stitches.
Rory didn’t feel a thing, but that didn’t make him want to look where the doctor was removing the stitches. “It took a little convincing to get Peggy to go, but once we got there, we both enjoyed it. I haven’t danced in years. Good to know I still remember my right foot from my left. What about you?”
Dr. Brandon smiled in understanding. “We had a great time. Brought back a lot of memories for Sherri and me. When we were in high school, we used to go to the dances, where I would routinely tread on her toes. Not much has change
d in the dancing department, but it was fun to try and the meal was great. I’m working on my cooking skills. Someday I hope to be able to cook roast beef as tender as what we had that night.”
“I love beef. I know it’s not the healthiest, but to me it’s perfect.”
“Couldn’t agree more, and I’m a doctor who’s supposed to encourage my patients to watch their fat intake.”
“If you ask me, it’s the fat that gives things flavor.”
Neill grinned. “Amen to that.”
Rory watched each movement Neill Brandon made, wondering all the while why it didn’t hurt. He was relieved there hadn’t been any blood. He didn’t want to wimp out in front of a man who was so at ease around such things.
“I understand from Sherri that you and Peggy have started dating.”
So they’d been talking about him. Did that mean Peggy was interested in him? More than just as a casual date? “Yeah, you could say that.”
“Glad to hear it. Peggy is a wonderful person.” There was a smile on his face when he looked at Rory. “I’m not into matchmaking, but I have a wife who thinks that everyone on the planet is entitled to find the perfect person to share their life with,” he said.
“I’m not very good at relationships,” Rory admitted, sensing that he could talk to Neill, one man to another.
“Same here. I made a huge mess of my relationship with Sherri back when we graduated from high school. Took me years to put things right.”
He was relieved to hear Neill admit that he’d had problems when it came to women. He wondered what else they might have in common. Having been busy getting his business started, Rory hadn’t had time to meet any guy friends. He sighed in resignation. “I’m not sure that I can make a commitment right now, and so I don’t want to lead Peggy to think that I can. But then I don’t want to come across as not interested, because I am. Seriously interested, I mean.”
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