by Shauna Allen
“Daddy! Let’s go. I’m hungry.”
Ryder’s whining from the other room snapped me out of my funk. I opened my door and made a running tackle from the hallway, flinging him over my shoulder, making him squeal. “Let’s go. Maybe Uncle Blake will let me throw you on the grill. I’ll bet you’re tasty.”
Ry giggled and flailed in my arms as I locked up and hefted him to the car. We rolled the windows down and sang along with Metallica (yeah, I’d raised my kid right) as we drove to Tori’s.
She met us in the parking lot, a big smile on her face. Today it was awesomely curve-hugging black shorts and a plain white T-shirt, little white tennis shoes, a headband, and big sunglasses.
She opened the car door before I could get there and poked her head inside. “Hi, guys.”
“Hi, Miss Waters,” Ryder answered from the backseat.
She slid inside, bringing her sinfully sweet scent with her, and dropped her gigantic bag on the floor between her feet. “You can call me Tori when we’re not at school if you want.” She smiled at me. “You, too.”
“Okay. Ready, Tori?”
“Definitely.”
Once we were on our way, I checked the rearview mirror to make sure Ry was occupied then I leaned over and squeezed her knee, whispering, “Bikinis, boy shorts, or thong?”
Confused, she stared at me. Then, a mischievous smile spread her kissable, glossed lips. “Commando.”
“Wha . . . ?” I sputtered when she laughed. “Jeez. Nearly gave me a heart attack there.”
“Well, some things a girl needs to keep to herself.”
“Color?” I prodded, now desperate to know about her panties.
She eyed me up and down. “Pink.”
“Lacy? Cotton?”
She shook her head and glanced back at Ryder. “Silk.”
I swallowed. That was probably enough of this particular game. “Thanks for coming with us tonight. I hear Blake has ribs on the grill and Rachel’s made some kind of super special dessert or something.”
Her timid smile melted my heart. “Thanks for inviting me. I don’t get out too much.”
I tilted my head in question, but she didn’t elaborate. I had gathered over the course of our . . . friendship/friends-with-kissing-benefits relationship . . . that she’d had a pretty lonely childhood and had spent nearly all of her adult life pulling herself out of poverty and trying to earn a future for herself. I admired her for it, but also wondered if she’d ever outrun whatever was pushing her so hard. But, whatever her reasons, I was glad she was making exceptions for me.
We pulled up in front of the Travers’ house and I parked behind Jesse’s Charger. Micah’s Jeep and a few other cars I didn’t recognize were lined up down the street.
I helped Ry out of his booster and he scampered between me and Tori, grabbing both of our hands so we made a three man chain. I caught Tori’s eyes. She seemed as surprised as I was, but I gave a small shrug and decided to roll with it.
I rang the doorbell and after a minute, Delilah’s cousin, Jewel answered. “Hi!” She said, wiping her hands on her jeans and stepping back. “Come on in. Blake’s out back and I’m helping Delilah finish up in the kitchen.”
We entered and it was immediately obvious that this was more than a small get-together. Micah was in Blake’s recliner, Blake’s baby girl, Molly, in his lap. I saw the back of Jesse’s blond head as the back screen door closed behind him as he carried out a plate of meat. His entire family—mother, father, sister, Leta, brother, Dwayne, and his entire brood of six—were all scattered around the living and dining room. Delilah’s younger sister, Danielle, who I’d heard was in her last year of law school, was perched on a dining room chair, cutting up tomatoes. There were also a few people I’d never met before. A woman roughly my mom’s age came out of the kitchen with a bowl of potato salad, a teenage girl with bright red hair hot on her heels with another bowl of what smelled like baked beans.
Ryder ran off to play with some of Dwayne’s kids in the back bedroom and I glanced down at Tori. She was a bit wide-eyed, and I couldn’t blame her. I linked our fingers, getting her attention with an encouraging smile. “Let’s go find something to drink.”
After a moment, she nodded. “Sure. It smells great in here, doesn’t it?”
“Sure does.” I inhaled and made out the scents of barbecue and baking bread and one of Delilah’s sweet candles that was burning in the corner.
We strolled into the kitchen, where Delilah, Rachel, and Jewel were sprinkling cupcakes with glittery candy dots.
“Hey, guys!” Delilah put her pink cake down and rushed over. “I’m so glad you came.” She hugged me like she hadn’t just seen me last week then collected Tori into a warm hug of welcome as though they were long lost friends.
“Hey.” Rachel hugged Tori, too, then drew her over to the desserts they were working on with a pointed glance in my direction.
Girl time. Got it.
With one final check that Tori was all good, I grabbed a beer and made my way to the backyard where Blake, Jesse, and some tall dude with coppery hair that looked vaguely familiar were huddled over the grill in mumbled conversation.
Blake noticed me first. “Hey, dude.”
I tipped my head, my eyes tracking to the newcomer. “What’s up?”
Jesse grinned and gave me a quick shake. “Trace, this is my brother-in-law, West Chaseman.”
“Oh. Right.” I held my hand out to Rachel’s brother. “We met briefly at the wedding. Nice to see you again.”
He accepted my shake. “Same here.” He was a serious one with wary eyes and a tight, stoic expression.
I took a breath, sipped my beer, and relished the familiarity of being with my friends. “So, what’s with Micah being inside on baby duty?”
Blake laughed. “Dee wrangled him into it so we could finish the food. He didn’t really have a choice.” He flipped a rack of ribs and some hotdogs, making the meat sizzle. “Between us, I think he likes it. He’s been pretty goo-goo over Molly since she was born though he hides it well.”
“Now he just needs a woman and he can have one of his own,” Jesse added.
“Fat chance,” I said with a wry laugh. “How’s he gonna get a girl if he won’t ever speak to one?”
“He talks to Dee and Rach,” Blake said.
“Only when he has to.”
West’s cell phone buzzed impatiently. “Sorry, guys. Gotta take this.” He strolled in the direction of the front yard, his phone pressed to his ear.
Jesse caught my puzzled frown. “He’s cool, man. Just quiet. He flew in from Wyoming for the weekend because Rach asked him to, but he’s a big shot architect and I think he’s dealing with some client drama.”
“Ah.” I plopped into one of the deck chairs. “So, what’s with all the people? Not that I’m complaining, I just thought you said a few friends, meat, and beer.”
Blake shrugged as he leaned against the table and sipped his drink. “Rachel and Dee cooked all this up. Guess they wanted a family and friends thing to celebrate the end of summer. They even bought sparklers.”
Jesse shook his head and drained his Budweiser. “I’m just excited about the cupcakes. She hasn’t let me anywhere near them since she started baking this morning.”
“You and sugar, man, I swear.”
Jesse nudged me with his foot. “Fuck off.”
I laughed. “I don’t blame you. It smelled fucking fantastic in there.”
“You bring Tori with you?” Blake asked, tongs back in hand as he yanked a rack off the grill.
I stifled my urge to clam up. It was all casual. No big deal. “I did.”
He glanced up at me. “I’m glad. As far as I can tell, you guys have been drooling over each other for months.”
I did not acknowledge that, but it was kinda nice to think the drooling might not have been one-sided.
Delilah poked her head out the back door. “Is the meat almost done? We’re all set in here and we’ve got some hung
ry kids.”
“Yeah.” Blake handed her the plate of hotdogs with a kiss to her cheek.
The door tapped behind her as she took them inside and I caught sight of Tori laying out a package of hotdog buns, her smiling face bent toward one of Dwayne’s little guys. I shifted away and finished off my beer, slightly uncomfortable with how attached I was getting to her. I’d kept women at a distance most of my life, but especially after Kristi. I’ve always been content to sail along, having fun, no strings, nothing serious. Then I got tied down with the most serious of relationships . . . not to complain. Ry was my life. Just me and him against the world. We didn’t need anything else.
Then why did I feel Tori stealthily slipping behind my barriers?
Ry came barreling out the door, two of Dwayne’s kids hot on his heels.
“Whoa, there, hot rod.” I grabbed his shirt sleeve and brought him to a quick halt. “Where are you going? Dinner’s ready.”
His face fell. “Can we eat later?”
“Tell you what, how about you eat a hotdog and drink some water then you can play until dessert. Deal?”
He glanced at his new friends then reluctantly nodded. “Yes, sir.”
We all tromped back inside and Tori caught my eye. I winked and she smiled. We moved through the crowd around the buffet until we were side by side.
“Hungry?” I asked.
“I am.” She shot a conspiratorial glance to Delilah and Rachel. “Can’t wait for dessert.”
“Uh, okay.” Women. We moved our way through the line after the kids had been served with Dwayne’s family, Micah, and Jewel in front of us, Jesse, Rachel, Blake, and Delilah taking up the rear.
We ate then congregated in the backyard as darkness descended, the kids running and squealing through the grass as Delilah lit mosquito-repellant tiki torches. I inhaled the fading scent of the grill along with the distant ocean breeze and a hint of honeysuckle.
Tori sidled up and looped her arm through mine, snuggling in to my side. “Thanks for bringing me. This is fun.”
I fought the urge to kiss her. “I’m glad you’re having a good time.”
We settled into a couple of deck chairs next to Micah, who was nursing the last of his water bottle, his dark eyes staring into nothingness. “Hey, dude. How’s it goin’?”
He startled as if lost in his own private world and glanced over. “Hey. Good, good. You guys?” He offered Tori a perfunctory smile, but knowing him like I did, I knew it was forced. Sometimes he seems so wounded, it made me wonder what Afghanistan had done to him, but he never spoke of it.
“This is great,” Tori said, smiling genuinely at my friend.
Micah peered around the yard as if seeing it for the first time. “Yeah.”
Tori turned back to me and caught my eye, leaving Micah with his privacy. Together, we watched Ryder run around in the grass like a banshee. He really seemed to be a content, well-adjusted child and I couldn’t help but wonder what meeting his mother for the first time would do to him. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Tori’s soft, dreamy smile and I was slammed by the thought that in another universe, this was how things should’ve been. Ryder should’ve had a woman to watch over him, to love him unconditionally. I should’ve had someone to share the joys and heartaches of raising him.
Tori must’ve felt my eyes. Facing me, her smile dropped a fraction. “What?”
“Nothing.” I glanced back to Ry. “Just thinking.”
“Care to share?”
I mentally shook off my funk and leaned over to kiss her just under her ear. “Not really. It’s all good, babe.”
She looked doubtful, but I was saved from further explanation as Delilah, Jewel, and Rachel swung through the backdoor in a flurry of excitement. Jewel walked into the yard and began wrangling the kids and helping with the sparklers. Ryder’s face glowed as bright as the firework in his hand as he twirled it in circles.
Delilah cleared her throat loudly. “Can I get everyone’s attention?”
Conversation died down as everyone faced her. She shot Tori a quick smile and wink. “It’s time for dessert, but since Rachel worked so hard on it, we thought she should serve Jesse first.”
“Thank God,” Jesse mumbled.
Rachel sauntered over to her husband, platter of cupcakes in hand, and set them in front of him with a flourish as the women began to gather closer. I stood to see what was up, but all I could see were regular ol’ cupcakes.
Grinning, Jesse cupped Rachel around the waist, hugging her close as he examined the dessert. Then his expression changed. The smile fell from his face as he looked closer, then peered up at his wife, question in his eyes. Back to the cupcakes, back to Rachel.
Laughing, she plopped down onto his lap and kissed his cheek, whispering something in his ear.
“You’re serious?” I heard him mumble, shock evident in his voice.
WTF?
I strolled over to stand behind Tori and peeked down at the cupcakes. Slathered in pink and blue frosting, they’d been decorated with sprinkly stuff and big, bold letters . . .
WE’RE PREGNANT
Holy shit. I peered back up at my friend who was now squeezing his wife hard enough to crack a rib, tears streaming down his face. Around me, all the women were in various states of weepiness, Blake was grinning, Rachel and Jesse’s families were beaming, and the kids continued to play, totally oblivious.
Obviously overcome, Tori spun and hurdled herself into my arms. “Isn’t that awesome?”
Catching Jesse’s eye over her head, I tipped my head in silent congrats as I hugged her close. “Very awesome.”
It was. Jesse and Rachel deserved every happiness. But why did I suddenly find myself jealous?
Tori
I woke up Sunday morning in the exact same emotional state as I’d gone to sleep. Excited. Nervous. Confused.
It was a deliciously exhilarating combination that had my head spinning, my heart thundering. My concerns about school were quickly diminishing, which should’ve scared me, but my feelings for Trace suddenly scared me more. He was everything I thought he’d be when I first met him and then some, and literally everything I’d ever wanted in a man. The fact he had a son only made me adore him more.
I rolled out of bed and padded to the kitchen. I stood, staring heavy-eyed at the coffeepot as it brewed, wondering what brunch at my mom’s would have in store. What would Trace think of Hope? I’d never opened myself up this way, and as much as I hated to admit it, I really wanted him to be accepting.
After pouring a big mug of my morning fix, I moved back to my room to decide what to wear. What the heck said ‘casual but not too casual’ and ‘Mom, this is my sorta boyfriend and his son, but it’s not serious’?
I finally settled on khaki capris, Chucks, and a salmon colored blouse that hugged my curves.
In the shower, I thought back on Saturday and how easy it’d been with his friends. I’d never felt so comfortable in such an intimate group before. Working with crowds as a waitress in a bar was one thing. Being around people who knew each other so well and shared life’s treasures together, was another. It shocked me that I’d felt part of the group, not just an observer. It probably helped that Delilah, Jewel, Rachel, and even Jesse’s sister, Leta, hadn’t really given me a choice. They treated me like I’d always been there.
And, Trace? Other than a minor blip where he acted a tad preoccupied, he’d been perfect. A gentleman. Funny. Attentive. Sexy.
God, I had it so bad.
After a quick makeup job and blow dry, I was munching a piece of toast when my doorbell rang. Swallowing my last bite, I ran to answer.
“Miss Waters!” Ryder greeted me first with the signature dimpled grin that genetics had gifted him with.
“Hey, you.” I stepped back and ushered them inside.
Trace offered me a smile, but didn’t say much as Ryder took over the room with his abundant energy. “We’re gonna see your mommy and your sister?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Do they like football?”
“Uh . . . I’m not sure. Probably not.”
Ryder rolled his eyes as if to say ‘girls.’ “Video games?”
I shrugged.
Trace cupped his tiny shoulder. “Why don’t we wait until we get there, Son? Then we’ll find out what they like, okay?”
Ryder reluctantly agreed and wandered off to examine the home of his counselor.
“Hi.” Trace leaned in, smelling delicious.
“Hi.” I didn’t hesitate to accept his kiss, brief and warm. A quick hello that hinted at so much more.
We pulled apart when Ryder’s clomping feet started our way again. I quickly grabbed my purse. “Ready?”
I hunted down my keys from the recesses of my bag then locked up behind us. When I paused next to Betsy, Trace simply eyed her with thinly veiled disgust.
“What?” I demanded, feeling a tad defensive.
His mossy eyes met mine. “You drive this?”
I narrowed my eyes at him as Ryder giggled behind us. “What did you think when you saw it in my parking space? It’s a rental cuz my Porsche is in the shop?” My gaze flicked over my car, trying to see it through his eyes. His mechanic’s eyes. Ugh. “She’s not as bad as she looks.”
“Really?” He did not sound convinced.
“Really. She’s been more dependable than any man in my life.”
His eyes lifted to mine and I bit my lip, sorry I’d let that little tidbit slip. Thank God he let it go. “Fine.” He sighed. “But you have mine and my son’s lives in your hands.”
I quirked a sarcastic brow. “Duly noted.”
Luckily, Betsy behaved herself and we arrived at my mom’s without incident. Ryder bounced out of the car like he’d been locked up for days rather than half an hour. I stepped out, stowed my keys in my purse, and inhaled. Even this short distance north had obscured the briny scent of the ocean I was so used to at home. Now, all I smelled was the neighbor’s freshly mowed grass and the promise of rain.
Before we got to the porch, the front door squeaked open and Hope stepped out, her face painted with a bright smile. “Tori!”
