I knew he referred to Giovanni nervousness the day we took nude pictures in Chad’s room. “He’s changed.” I bit my lip, but I couldn’t reveal something very personal for Giovanni. “Never mind.”
“You guys OK?” Giovanni called from the other side of the door. Then he opened it and froze for a few seconds. “Uh... Something I should know about?”
“No.” Chad took a deep breath. “She’s trying to make me feel like I’m not an asshole for what I did last night. I can’t say I’m sorry enough.” He gently pushed me away. “It won’t happen again.”
Giovanni nodded. “I know. Just drop it. A few things happened last night I’d like to forget.” There was regret in his eyes. “You feel a’right though, Chad?”
“I’m fine.” Chad stretched. “I might be able to eat now.” He stepped forward.
His eyes filled with concern, Giovanni moved toward Chad then briefly hugged him. “We’re here for you.” I was glad I wasn’t the only one who saw the sadness.
The rest of dinner was quiet. Afterward, the three of us cleaned up as a unit. Chad still seemed down. We moved into the living room, and I sat between them.
“You should go for a ride,” Giovanni suggested. “Always clears my head.”
Chad shrugged. “Driving don’t do that for me.”
“No. I mean on my bike.” Giovanni grabbed my hand and squeezed. He was obviously unsure about someone else on his bike. “Take her out for a while.”
Chad hesitated. That told me he wanted to accept. “That's your baby. I can't.” He stared at his hands. “It’s cold out anyway.”
To encourage him, I patted Chad’s thigh. “How about just around the corner?”
After a shake of his head, Chad turned to me. “Maybe in the spring.”
Silence fell over the room for a minute. Then Giovanni spoke up, “I was talking to Phil the other day. He thinks we should get a trailer and just take one van. It’ll save on gas.”
“But both of ours only seat three.” Chad looked up, deep in thought for a few seconds. “Guess we could get a bench seat and throw it in back.” He leaned over me so he could see Giovanni. “I been thinking of buying a new van anyway. Mine’s getting old. You should sell yours too. Then we could get something bigger.”
Giovanni’s eyes opened wide. “I can't.” His voice softened. “It’s the last thing I have from my dad.”
“Sorry.” Chad frowned. “Didn’t think of that.”
I leaned on Giovanni’s chest and hugged him. “You don’t have to hide your feelings around me.”
“I’m OK,” Giovanni whispered. Then he ran his fingers through my hair. “If you buy a new van, it’ll get better gas mileage.” He pulled me onto his lap, to allow me to see Chad again.
“True.” Chad smiled. “We could get an airbed for the back. It might be cramped, but we’ll figure it out.” He cocked an eyebrow. “I should ask Jon if they have room for our stuff on one of their trucks.”
Giovanni nodded. “Yeah. Good idea.”
I put my arm over Giovanni’s shoulder. “See. It’s working out beautifully.”
Chapter 6
The Friday before the tour started, we were set to play at Bay Ridge High School, in Brooklyn. I stood just backstage with James Keloha. He and I had spoken several times in the last week, which allowed me to be comfortable with him.
“It’ll be like practice for next Friday.” He smiled at me.
My hands shook as I looked out at the auditorium, filled with about three thousand. “I don’t get why we’re at a school.” He had only told me they wanted us to join them for an acoustic show as an opening act.
“The second band goes to school here. They won a citywide Battle of the Bands contest we sponsored.” He put his strong hands on my shoulders. “They’re gonna love you guys. Did you know I went to this school too?”
I smiled and looked back at him. “Really?”
“Yeah, some of my old teachers are still here. My band teacher was shocked when I walked in his class this afternoon. And the kids were flippin’ out!” He laughed and squeezed my shoulders. “I feel like a kid again.”
Then I heard Tyler Gunn’s voice come over the speakers. “We wanna start the show with somethin’ special.” There were cheers in return.
“Hey, baby. You ready?”
I looked up at Chad. “I guess. There’s a lotta people out there.”
“I know. So cool. Not as many as in Michigan though.”
“That was terrifying.” I recalled the slight stage fright when I first stepped onto that stage.
Giovanni appeared on my other side. “Um… what am I supposed to do? You told me not to bring my drums.”
James stepped away from me and said something to a roadie. Then he handed Giovanni a set of odd drumsticks. “There’s a scaled down set on the stage. Use these and don’t bang too hard or you’ll break ’em.”
Giovanni laughed as he held up the rods. “I seen these in the store a few weeks ago. Never thought I’d be using ’em.”
“You’ll do more acoustic shows as you get bigger. You’ll see.”
I smiled. We were lucky our very first CD sold so well. Not many new bands were as popular as we were.
“You’re up,” James said just as Chris came to us.
Giovanni picked up my hand, and the four of us walked onto the stage. The crowd erupted right away, and I smiled up at him. “You’ll do fine. Relax.” He kissed my forehead then left me to sit behind the small drum kit.
Phil handed me my guitar then picked up his. He had had learned Tommy’s piece to my song, “Trapped in the Middle” and would play with us for just that song. He sat next to Chad, with a huge smile on his face.
I sat on Chad’s other side. As I shielded my eyes, I looked out at the audience. They continued to clap and whistle. The lights were so bright it was hard to see much beyond a few rows of seats. That was good for my nerves.
I closed my eyes and played the opening notes to my song. After Chad came in with the rhythm, Giovanni and Phil joined. With Chris’ first words, the reason I wrote the song filled my mind. Thankfully, the sad memories did not affect me enough to show, but a few tears did fall. The month that I lived with Tommy was filled with such confusion.
After the last note, the crowd cheered. I looked up, shocked. I had not expected that reaction. However, it made me smile. Giovanni started the intro to “You Can’t Change Me.” Then I was back to five strings, like my custom bass.
Since we played acoustic, we kept to our softer songs mostly. The next one we did was “Why Can’t You Love Me?” Chad had written it before I got together with Giovanni. Then it didn’t seem like a big deal to put on the album, but it was slightly awkward to perform.
Chad had a sad look in his eyes. How emotional the songs we chose were, had not occurred to me until that moment. It was difficult to control my own feelings. After I took a deep breath, I laid my head on Chad’s shoulder for a while.
He sighed and whispered, “Thank you, baby.”
The performance ended with “I’m Nothing Without You.” Chad tried to hide his tears from everyone, but I noticed. When it was over, I hugged him tightly. That song told the world how much it hurt to lose me.
“I love you,” I quietly told him.
His body shuddered. “It’s not the same, baby.” Then he pulled away and went backstage.
Giovanni, Chris, Phil and I sat on the sidelines as we watched the band that won the contest. They were a seven-piece band, which was unusual. Their music was even more unique. It was a mix of rap and rock. Besides a drummer, two guitarists and bass player, they had a keyboard player and someone on turntables. They had a lot of energy. I was sure James would tell Jon about them as soon as he could.
“I never heard anything like them,” Giovanni whispered when their set was over. He wrapped his arms around me from behind. “Maybe we should add a keyboard.”
I leaned back on him. “When we get back from the tour we can look for somebody.�
��
“What d’ ya think of them?” James asked from behind us.
Giovanni turned us around somewhat. “Good choice. Jon’ll love these guys. Unless you have plans to start your own label.”
“Nah.” James laughed. “I still party too much to start one. I seen all the hard work Jon and Tommy put into Demonfire. They signed us not long after they started it. So we got to watch them grow. Was pretty cool.”
Craig and Tyler came to us. Craig winked at me before he said, “There’s a party afterward, so hang around.”
I turned to the stage. Roadies set up Brass Monkey’s equipment. “I haven’t seen you guys in concert for like two years. So I’m not going anywhere.” I was curious how they would play their very heavy music acoustically.
Craig leaned toward us. “Maybe later we can have our own party.” Then he walked onto the stage.
Brass Monkey was an incredible band, so I was excited to see them live again. I loved how they sang choruses together with such amazing harmony. In addition, the synchronization Craig and Rob had blew my mind. I had never seen two guitarists be in each other’s heads as much as Chad and I had always been when we played together. They sometimes played a solo as one. That took years of practice and a lot of talent.
As we watched their performance, noticed what Tommy told me about them. Their interaction between songs showed how close they were. They seemed like brothers. Moreover, each one seemed to anticipate the other’s next move.
They had changed each song just enough to soften it and played their one ballad. The crowd seemed to love it all. I jumped up and down when they began “The Path to Darkness.” It was my favorite song.
As soon as they said good night, Rob Allen, their lead guitarist, came right to us, his Yankees cap backward, as usual. “There’s a party in the gym. Just follow the signs.” His Brooklyn accent was as strong as the others in the band. “Damn I miss this school.”
“Thanks. We’ll be there,” Chris told him.
A girl threw her arms around Rob. He smiled and kissed her lips. “Hey, sweetie. I missed you.” Then he looked at me. “We’ll see you back there.”
Chris grinned. “They got some hot girls here. Where’s Chad? He needs a good fuck.”
I exhaled loudly and wished he hadn’t said that. “He ran off, and this is a high school. Don’t touch any girl without looking at her driver’s license first.”
“You’re no fun.” Chris smirked. “I’ll find Chad and get him a hot blonde or something.” Chris followed Rob and his girlfriend.
Giovanni put his arms around me from behind and started to walk, as he pushed me along. I couldn’t help but laugh. Then after a while, he lifted me up and tossed me over his shoulder.
“Hey put me down!” I shouted as I still giggled.
He soon walked through the hallway. Students and parents stared at us. I waved at them as we passed.
“Where we going?”
Giovanni smacked my ass. “To the party.” After he opened a door, I heard laughter and music.
“Put me down!”
He ignored me and carried me to the back of the room. There were people everywhere. I recognized a few roadies. Phil and Chris talked to two girls. I didn’t see Chad though.
Slowly, Giovanni set me on the floor, in a corner. Then he pressed me up against the wall. “I have big plans for you tonight,” he whispered then kissed my lips strongly. His arms leaned on either side of my head.
I was shocked by a flash and broke the kiss. A man with a professional camera took shots close by. “It’s gotta wait. There’s kids here.”
Giovanni turned around. “Damn. Yeah. I guess it does, but I can still kiss you. You’re gonna be my wife in a month tomorrow.”
“True.” I had forgotten how close Valentine’s Day was. Then I realized I had not gotten a dress yet and wouldn’t have time to get one before we left for the tour. “I got so much to do for—”
He interrupted me with another kiss. That one was even more passion-filled. I put my arms around him as he leaned his body into mine. When his tongue darted into my mouth, his cock started to harden against my belly.
“I need to get you home and make love to you,” he whispered, breathlessly.
Suddenly, someone cleared their throat. I looked past Giovanni and recognized the principal who had spoken before Tyler did at the show. “None of that here,” he admonished us.
My cheeks turned bright red, and I buried my face in Giovanni’s chest.
He pulled me close. “I feel like a teenager.”
We didn’t move until I lifted my head. “Can we go find, Chad. Please?”
“Sure.”
We walked around the room as we held hands. After almost thirty minutes, I spotted Chad by himself. Then I pulled Giovanni over to him.
“Hey, you OK?” I sat next to Chad.
He shrugged and stared at the cup in his grip.
I ran a hand over his bicep. “Anything I can do?”
He stood up and turned away from me.
“Do you guys want a few minutes alone?” Giovanni asked.
Chad looked up at him but didn’t answer.
I knew that meant yes. “If you don’t mind.” I squeezed Giovanni’s hand.
“I’ll go talk to James. You guys hash this out. OK?”
I smiled as he walked away. Not many men could handle it if their fiancé had a male best friend. Especially not one they had cheated with. I shook the guilty feelings away quickly.
Before I could say anything, Chad hugged me. “I wanna move on. I swear I do, but it’s so hard. Everything reminds me of you.”
“Take it slow.” I rubbed his back. “Things’ll fall into place. There’s a girl out there for you.” I closed my eyes to hide the pain of my own words. “You’re gonna be happy sometime soon. I just know it.”
I held him as he shook a bit and tried to keep the tears at bay. He pulled me as close to him as possible. We just stood there, for a really long time, without a word. The pain in his heart was worse than it had ever been before. I was afraid he would throw himself into another addiction to forget again. There had to be something I could do to help.
“Chad!” Chris shouted.
I turned around. Chris walked toward us. Chad let me go and put a hand on my shoulder.
“You gotta do this for me.” Chris was obviously excited. “Dude, this chick wants me to go home with her, but she won’t leave unless you do her twin sister. Damn, they’re so hot.”
“Are you nuts?” Chad replied. “I don’t do one-night stands.” He looked down at me. “Baby, I’m sorry. Chris, how could you ask me in front of her?”
I sighed. “It’s OK.” I took a deep breath and reminded myself he wasn’t mine. “Go have fun.”
“I’m not fucking a stranger.”
Chris looked up at Chad. “She really thinks you’re cute. All you have to do it keep her busy while I nail her sister.”
I shook my head and laughed. “You’re such a whore.”
Chris turned to me. “Call me whatever you want. I get the hottest chicks to do almost anything.” Then he looked at Chad again. “Come on, man. Do it for me. Please.”
“I’m not like you,” Chad told him.
“So what?”
Then Chris turned around and waved at the sisters. Even I thought they were hot, but barely legal I was sure. I could see why Chris was so animated.
Then Giovanni put his arms around me from behind again. “What’s going on?”
“I’m trying to get Chad together with a very eager girl, but he keeps saying no.” Chris was frustrated. “Tell him he needs to get laid.”
Giovanni smiled. “You don’t know Chad, man. He’s like me that way. We never did those kinds of things, even in college.”
“I think you should go.” I surprised even myself with those words.
Chad bent down and whispered, “You sure it wouldn’t bother you?”
“Just go. It’s OK,” I softly lied.
; He sighed. “Well, maybe…”
Chris cut him off and grabbed his arm. “I don’t care if you fuck her or not. Just kiss her a lot or whatever. Tell her you got a disease. Otherwise I get nothing, and I like sex with strangers.”
“Go, Chad,” Giovanni encouraged him. “You never know, man.”
Chris pulled Chad away. He looked back at me, and I smiled as widely as I could. Then Chad pulled his keys out and threw them to Giovanni. “Let Phil drive.”
I watched as the girls basically threw themselves at Chris and Chad. When Chad put his arm around the girl he was dragged over there for, I closed my eyes. It hurt so much more than I thought it should have. Tears welled up.
“I hope he has a good time.” Giovanni startled me. Then he pulled me closer to him. “He does need to get laid.”
I blinked my eyes, to stop the tears. The pain was intense. I couldn’t imagine him with another woman. Could Chad really screw some random girl?
Giovanni backed up then put an arm around my waist. We walked across the room to Phil. “Hey, Chad’s not going home. You drive.” He tossed the keys to him.
Phil smiled. “He went with Chris? Damn, he needs to get laid. He’s been driving me up a wall.” Then he disappeared into the crowd.
I took a deep breath. I couldn’t handle it. “Can we get a drink?”
“I doubt they have alcohol, but I’ll go get you some soda. OK?” Giovanni caressed my cheek. “What’s the matter?”
I turned away. “Nothing important.”
“All your feelings are important to me.”
“It’s nothing. Really.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I wanna just forget it. OK?”
He nodded and headed in the direction of the refreshment table.
I sighed and closed my eyes. After several deep breaths, I cleared my mind then imagined what it would be like to play in front of thousands every night. My stage fright would most likely fade after the first few.
“What you thinkin’ about?” Arms were quickly around my ribs. I knew the voice was Craig’s. “Maybe about my big cock inside you again?” he whispered as he leaned close to my ear. “I know a place where no one’ll find us.”
Dual Desires (Triple Threat Book 3) Page 5
