“I tried them. Twice. They didn’t work.”
Ava’s heart skipped a beat. That was very bad news. Then what hope did they have? Like it or not, there were few ways to stop a hex and that was the only way Ava knew.
“No.” Stefan shook his head. “You mix them, Ava. It has to be you. I just know it, and sometimes, I just know things. That’s part of my power. So does Lawson. It’s how he finds you. He just knows. Psycho-telepathy. I know, you think it doesn’t exist. But it does. We all have it. That’s how we get to be Enforcers. You mix it. The only way it will work if it is comes from you. It might not even then, but Kim won’t be able to do this. If she can’t spell away a hex, she can’t do it.”
She could hardly believe what he’d said but there was no time to argue. Okay, if she had to mix it then she would get it done. She handed the bowl to Kim. “We’ll have to be fast. I’m going to do this. And then that has to be instant. He might fight me.”
Stefan and Kim both knelt down on opposite sides of Lawson. Stefan spoke again, “I won’t let him.”
That would have to do. Lawson’s black eyes seemed to zoom in on her. “Hello, potion maker. It’s too late. He’s dead, and when he’s dead, they’ll never find me. Not ever.” Lawson’s voice used to speak for the hexer made her go cold. She wanted the person doing this to suffer, greatly.
“We’ll see about that.” Ava grabbed her syringe and jammed it straight into Lawson’s heart. Or at least where she was ninety-nine percent sure it was. Gary had told her about this, but she’d never even seen it. He gasped, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, and for a second, she wondered if she’d killed him.
But there was no time to waste, no energy for doubt. “Potion.”
Kim passed it to her, and she started to pour it down his throat. Stefan massaged his throat, and when Lawson grabbed her arm to stop her, Kim yanked him so hard he had no choice but to stop. They were going to save him.
It took time. They couldn’t drown him, which meant stopping to let him gasp for air. And then finally, there was peace.
“It’s off.” Even without being able to see it, Ava would have known that. Lawson’s own control returned. Even with his eyes closed and his body so still except for the gentle inhale and exhale of his breath, she’d known. He was back.
Kim threw her arms around Ava. “I knew you could do it. Gary always said you were the very best.”
Ava felt like she was outside her own body. “What? You knew Gary?” How did Kim know Ava’s mentor?
“Sure. He was an Enforcer. He’d retired when you met him, but he stayed on, consulting. He was the very best.”
That he was. Ava could hardly make sense of what was being said to her. Time was moving, yet she somehow stayed still.
“That’s how Lawson knew,” Stefan explained, “to come get you at the wedding. Gary always said you were the best potion maker he’d ever seen.”
Stefan made sense of things Ava hadn’t understood.
Her heart had gone cold. She couldn’t continue as she had been. It wasn’t fair to Lawson, and she wouldn’t lie about who she had been and what she needed.
“If you take him to his house, I’ll care for him until he’s better. Unless that breaks some rule. Or you know what, I don’t care if it does. I’m taking care of him. I love him. I need to do that.”
Kim nodded. “Of course you can.”
She stood, moving to get a washcloth so she could wipe Lawson’s face off. “If this person got both Kim and Lawson, then doesn’t it make sense that it has to be someone you both encountered? I mean, I realize this isn’t my job, but since I’ve saved two out of three of you, I am going to insert myself before I have Stefan lying here on the ground. With this powerful a hex—and the one on you, Kim—you had to be touched. I imagine you know that. So, who grabbed both of you and…”
Her voice trailed off. Both Stefan and Kim were staring at her. “But then again, you said he expected Kim to be able to save him which meant he knew this would happen. So he planned it. Lawson let himself get hexed so you could all do some process of elimination.”
Stefan rocked back on his heels. “Ava, look…”
Kim held out her hand. “Don’t try to pacify her, honey. She has every right to feel how she’s going to feel about it. Stefan would gladly have done it. But there are too many people he and I see as a couple. We had to see if we were right, and that could only be done by Lawson.”
Ava had gone cold inside. Did she expect that Lawson’s job was hard? Yes. Had she expected there was danger and that danger could befall him? Yes. Did she expect he would volunteer for it? Well, maybe she should have, but she hadn’t.
And there it was. The thing she wasn’t going to be able to live with. “Pop him home for me, will you? And one of you will have to bring me there, too. As you know, I can’t do things like that.”
Stefan bent over and touched Lawson. They both disappeared from the room. Kim didn’t move. “You do that, explain or apologize for yourself, like you have to always make it okay or get out ahead of the things that don’t work the way they should. But you don’t. What you have twice done now on a moment’s notice? That is strong magic. And maybe it’s not traditional. Maybe you don’t use spells, but the ingredients? They work for you, and they didn’t for me.”
“Kim…” She couldn’t do this right now. “I thank you for that. I really do. But my heart is breaking. Maybe that won’t make sense to you.”
The other woman shook her head. “It does. I wanted to be able to fix this. I wanted to be able to get the hex off him and get him home to you a week ago. I couldn’t, and I knew what that meant. So did he for a little bit. He loves you. This life? I’m not sure I could be with Stefan if I wasn’t doing it, too. I wish I could make you an Enforcer.”
Ava laughed. “I don’t. Dealing with this twice? And the mess with Howard? I don’t want anything to do with what you do.”
“He’s going to recover now. And then, this is going to kill both of you.”
Ava suspected that Kim was right. Once, not so long ago, she’d imagined being left at the altar was the worst she could ever feel. She’d been wrong. Losing Lawson would be her undoing.
Ava had never taken care of anyone when they were sick before. Lawson didn’t require much. She kept him hydrated. He hardly roused at all the first two days, and then after that, only to take sustenance and then back to sleep for two more.
It was on the fifth day he opened his eyes and she knew that he recognized her. “Hey, tiny.”
She smiled at him. They would have time to sort out their stuff and come to their inevitable ending. If she only had days, she wanted them to be nice ones.
“Hey, look who’s up. Come on, sit a bit so I can give you some water.” He did as she asked, groaning through the experience but finally getting upright.
“Remind me to never give anyone trouble about their sick leave after a hexing.”
She blinked. “Don’t give anyone trouble for their sick leave after a hexing.”
Lawson rolled his eyes. “Thanks.”
“Welcome. Here.” She fed him some water, and he let her, which spoke volumes to how he felt right then.
When he was finished, she set the glass aside. “Hungry?”
“Not yet. Hey.” He scratched his head. “I don’t know how I got here. Kim, must have…”
She shook her head, effectively interrupting him. “Not Kim.”
“You, then.” He winced. “I told Stefan not to…”
“I know.” Neither one of them was going to be able to finish a thought. “But he did. You should rest. I’m here if you need me.”
His tired gaze met her own. “Ava.”
“Sleep, Lawson.”
* * *
The next time he roused, he was hungry and she was finally able to feed him something she cooked, even if it was just soup. He ate it, and his color improved. When she came back from putting the dish in the sink, he’d fallen asleep again. Gary had sa
id it could be weeks until someone was really back up to speed after a hexing. She walked over to him and touched his cheek. He’d grown a beard in the time he’d been sick. Stefan had come by every day and set a spell so that Lawson was getting clean even though he couldn’t get out of bed.
She’d have to ask Lawson if he wanted Stefan to add shaving to that routine.
* * *
He surprised her the next morning in the kitchen. She’d been looking at a human recipe when he came through the door, or stumbled through it as the case turned out to be. Ava yelped and then laughed. “What are you doing out of bed, crazy?”
“You weren’t there. I came looking.” He made it to a seat by the kitchen table. “You look tired, Ava. If I’m going to sleep all day, you can get some rest.”
No way was she going to respond to that. Not since the first night when she’d counted his every breath had she slept next to him. She couldn’t. It was too much pain. Ava decided avoidance was in order. She took a seat across from him. “Do you want Stefan to spell you to not grow hair on your face right now or have it auto off? Whatever he’s able to do?”
Lawson shook his head. “I think I can do it later. I’ll rest for a bit after this great trek across the house, and then I can try and bathe myself and whatnot.”
“Maybe you should wait to try that until Stefan comes. In case you need help. I’m not strong enough.” She didn’t add the bit about not having magic. Lawson knew the circumstances, and Kim was right. Ava had done enough explaining in her life to last several existences.
He nodded. “You’re right.”
“How are you feeling? What can I get you?” She rose. Instead of waiting for him to answer, she poured water and went to the fridge. It was full, thanks to Kim’s spells, and she pulled out some turkey. He probably needed protein and lots of it.
Lawson made a strange sound, and she turned to see him holding his head. She quickly set down the turkey and went back to him. “Not ready to be up yet. I know you want to be tough. You’re already doing better than could be expected. You should be dead. You were all but there. This is a marathon, not a sprint. This time next week, you’ll be sitting at the kitchen table.”
She let him lean on her, and despite the fact she wasn’t that strong, they made it back to the bedroom, and she got him resting in the bed. “I’m going to start to put things in your water. Herbs that I’ve heard are good for this. Stefan says we can’t call the Healer, so you’re stuck with what I know about recovery.”
“I’d hardly call it stuck, love.”
His words panged her heart, and she ignored the sensation. Not yet. She loved this man, she just knew she couldn’t live with his life. A stronger woman could and that was what he deserved.
His sharp gaze followed her movements. “Are you okay? Come lie down with me.”
“I can’t just now.” She adjusted his pillows. “Get some more rest.”
There would only be so long that he would take her avoidance. The second he was back to even half speed, she’d have to start explaining.
* * *
Knowing what was coming and living with it were two different things. She couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, could hardly breathe. She lay on his couch, his bedroom door slightly open so she could hear if he needed her, and listened to the sounds his house made at night.
The door swung open, and he walked, impressively steady this time, to her. He’d bathed. She could smell the soap and his sandalwood scent. She didn’t speak a word, and finally, he sat down on the chair next to the couch.
“Why are you sleeping out here and not with me?” His voice was hard. He might not be one hundred percent yet, but this was the Lawson she knew, and she wouldn’t play games.
She sat up. “Because it would break my heart even worse to do so.”
He snapped his fingers, a sign he was still not whole, and the lights rose in the living room. “Why is that?”
“Because we can’t do this anymore.”
He leaned back in his chair. “Same question.”
“You know why.”
Lawson looked away. “It’s a hard job. Always was, always will be. Sometimes we put our lives on the line. We know it’s one of three people now. Nothing has changed. I shouldn’t even be telling you this. You understood who and what I was.”
“I did and I didn’t. If you want to make this my fault, that is fair. But I could say the same thing to you. Nothing has changed. You knew who I was. That’s why you told Stefan not to get me. I couldn’t live with failing you and it being my fault. Well, I can live with a lot. You were right, not that and not knowing that you would take extreme risks with your own life. Things happening to you? That I can’t control any more than if you got struck by something in the head and died. Or you got sick with an incurable disease. Letting yourself be hexed? On purpose? I’m sorry, I’m weak. It’s too much.” She rose. “I’ll go. Stefan comes by every morning so you’ll only have tonight without someone checking on you.”
Lawson got to his feet. “You will come back around. You need time to process this. I get it. Or I’m trying to. You love me; I can feel it. And you know I love you. People don’t feel this way and not work it out. You’re my girl.”
“Lawson, I can’t be what you need, and I can’t live with this. I’m sorry.”
He clenched his fists. “Ava, don’t do this. Please, love. We don’t have to make heavy proclamations right now.”
“I do love you, Lawson. You won’t believe that, but I do.”
She made it home before she shattered into a million pieces.
Chapter 15
She stocked the shelves. She went home and then went to the store. Over and over. How many days had passed since she’d said goodbye to Lawson? She wasn’t sure anymore. A million times she went to his warehouse to tell him she’d made a mistake, and a million times she decided she had not.
He’d known he was going to get hexed, and he’d thrown himself into it. That was noble, brave, self-sacrificing. And not something she could live with. How hadn’t he understood that she lived and breathed—and would even more so every year that this continued—for him? How had he been fine with that decision?
How would he feel if she’d done the same? Lawson was brave beyond a measure that she could even fathom. She loved him for it. But it would slowly kill her inside. If she was a small-minded, unworthy girlfriend, then at least she had the wherewithal to know she should leave him alone.
She closed her eyes and leaned against the doorway. In two days, she’d be closing the shop for good. Monica was opening her space in Todd’s old store. That wasn’t why Ava was leaving, but it didn’t hurt. Life was moving on. It was time she did the same.
“Ava.” She turned at the sound of her name. It took her a second to place the man in the poorly fitted suit as Ryan, Lawson’s boss.
She’d disliked him immensely, and so had Johanna. What was he doing in her shop? “Ryan. Can I help you?”
“Yes.” He nodded fast. “I think you can.”
She walked toward the counter. “How so?”
“Well, you can die.”
She blinked. “What?”
That was when she finally heard the voice. He’d been deeper when he spoke through the hexing, when he’d taken over first Kim and then Lawson, but it was the same. She sucked in her breath. Ryan was the hexer. What little she knew about any of this, it finally all made sense. Kim had been hexed and so had Lawson. They both knew Ryan. He was probably privy to Lawson’s plans.
She backed up, and he pointed at her, freezing her in place. “Don’t run away now. You’ve been so fearless, so brave. Taking me on not once but twice. We can’t continue to allow that to happen.”
“Why did you do this?” She wasn’t afraid. With Howard there had been real fear that she wouldn’t survive, and she had no death wish now. But facing danger over and over somehow took away the sting. Maybe this was how Lawson did this. He simply developed a resistance to the terror.
“I’ve always done this. For years and years. No one noticed. Just because someone caught on doesn’t mean I have to stop.” He shouted his last word. “You don’t even know the particulars. I want Lawson to know what pain is. I want him to understand what it means. Killing you, hexing you until you’re dead, will mean he finally gets it. Then he’ll stop looking for me.”
She swallowed. “Lawson and I aren’t together anymore.”
“I don’t care.”
A wave of power moved over Ava, and she hit the ground. Her body buzzed. It took her a moment to realize what had happened—Ryan had hexed her.
“Stop.” Lawson popped into the room. “Ryan. You don’t have to do this. Ava just told you. We’re not together anymore.”
Ryan actually cackled. Ava wasn’t sure she’d ever heard that sound before outside of fiction. Her body… itched. She scratched at her skin and then forced herself to stop. She’d been hexed. Ryan was the man who’d done it. Two more pops. Okay, there were people here to deal with him. She’d been the only one to be able to get his hexes off. That probably hadn’t changed.
She turned around. Most people who had been hexed didn’t realize right away. She had an advantage and…
Kim touched her arm. “I can get this off you. It’s weak.”
Ava stared at Kim. When had the other woman arrived? She must have been one of the pops. She nodded. Worst case scenario: it wouldn’t work. Ava would get back to trying to get the hex off herself. Kim stared at her for a moment and then a cool burst of air moved through her. Her knees gave out, and Kim caught her.
“I’ve got you. Phew. I’ve really started to wonder if I’d totally lost my touch.”
“I…”
Kim nodded. “I know, sit down. You only had it a minute and it’s too long. Breathe. It’ll pass.”
The crack she’d heard the time Howard died sounded, deafening her ears again. This time she didn’t faint.
Hexed and Vexed Page 17
