Things were really looking up for me after all the pain that I went through in the previous weeks. I can honestly say things took a turn for the better. I would’ve never thought in a million years that I would be given this grand opportunity.
I had to give it to that Federal Bitch because it was her brilliant idea along with my Hollywood performance. “I swear to you I see an Academy Award in the making. Mrs. Shayna Jackson; best female actress!” I busted out laughing at that. See that bitch saw my husband and I and somehow in that sick head, she felt like she could replace me. Only this time, she fucked the wrong nigga and look at everything that was happening.
I would love to see the look on Alijah’s face when he realized that he fucked up his life over a poor, underprivileged, stinking pussy. I tell you, men never learn. Well no, in his case he learned the hard way. Oh well, life goes on in the free world.
I poured me a glass of wine and cut on the slow jams. I was in the mood to celebrate my new job and my new mission.
“Cheers to me; the baddest bitch that ever walked these streets,” I screamed as I raised my glass.
I drank two more glasses and got into bed. I had a long day ahead of me and I needed all the rest that I can get in.
***
I looked in the mirror at my new appearance. I looked damn good to be a woman in my fifties. That makeup artist was the truth. Somehow my new appearance reminded me of Mrs. Doubtfire, so ironic I thought. That’s my favorite movie that Alijah and I done watched over five times.
I never thought of becoming an actress, but after the way I performed when I applied for the job, I say I could get an award. I was actually sitting across from the whore that broke up my marriage and it tickled me that she had no idea that it was me. She did ask if we met before, that kind of spooked me, but I remained calm, cool and collected. The mother on the other hand was going to be a problem. I saw the way she kept looking at me as I spoke. I thought I was going to lose my cool when she started to question me, but luckily her daughter jumped in. I had a feeling that bitch was not going to let up; however she was in a run for her money because I was that bitch that she didn’t want any kind of trouble with.
I gained Sierra’s trust and before long I was taking care of her child. As I looked in his face, all I could see was Alijah. Our first day alone was very hard, as I held him in my arms, I burst out crying; this was supposed to be Alijah and I baby boy instead he killed mine and now here he was with a baby by another bitch.
There were so many emotions running through me at the time, that I came that close to suffocating the little bastard with his own pillow. Shit I could’ve blamed it on SIDS. I would’ve loved to see the expression on his father’s face when he learned that his baby Jesus had died. I bet money his ass would’ve burst out crying and carrying on just like he did when my baby passed. He had everyone around us fooled like he was mourning. That was all a show. His ass was too selfish to even care. I was buried deep in my thoughts that I didn’t know the grandma was approaching me until it was too late.
“What are you doing with that pillow and why are you standing over my daughter’s baby crying?”
“Ms. Jeanette! You startled me, I am so sorry. I was trying to put the pillow by the side of his crib for support.”
“Yea right and you crying?”
“Yes, I got news earlier that one of my cousin’s in Louisiana passed away.”
“Mmm hmm whatever.” She said while walking away.
I quickly wiped my tears. That was a close call. I straightened up my clothes, and made sure the wire that I was wearing under my clothes was not visible. I left the room and went downstairs. That woman was becoming a nuisance and I hadh to get rid of her fast.
***
I had things to do before I headed to work and I needed to make sure I didn’t wear my wire today. Shoot if the feds asked what happened I’d just pretend like I forgot to wear it. I stopped on the corner of Broad Street. The young bums were posted selling their drugs of choice. I pulled over and bought me a forty bag of crack. I also stopped at the convenience store and bought a rose and a lighter. I sat in the car and burned the rose so it would look like it has been used. In less than twenty minutes, my mission was accomplished.
I headed to work and pulled up in the driveway. I was greeted at the door as usual by the very polite Sierra. We chatted for a little. Azir was asleep in her room so I decided to do the laundry. I left Sierra downstairs and headed upstairs to get his dirty laundry basket and since he was asleep in his mom’s bed I decided to strip his mattress.
I waited two minutes…then I ran hurriedly down the stairs into the kitchen.
“Ms. Sierra I need to talk to you.” “What is it Ms. Sadie? You look like you’d seen a ghost.”
“I was changing the sheet in his crib and when I took off his bedding this fell out from under the sheet.” I opened my hand to reveal the twenty dollar bag of crack and the rose.
“What the hell is that?” She grabbed the package out of my hand.
“I’m no expert, but I believe its crack and a pipe ma’am.”
“Oh hell no, you found this in my baby’s crib?”
“Yes ma’am I don’t mean to upset you, it’s just dangerous for something like this to be in a baby’s crib.”
She pushed me out of the way and stepped to the foot of the stairs.
“Jeanette!!!!”
“What Chile, all that darn hollering.” Jeanette said as she walked down the stairs.
“You back getting high?”
“What? Sierra it’s too early for this shit.”
“Goddamit answer me.”
“No I’m not.”
“So how the fuck did this get into my baby crib?” She grabbed her arm.
“Let go of me. I don’t know how that got there. Why don’t you ask her?”
“I am asking you, Ms. Sadie found it. I can’t believe that I brought you in my house and you still getting high.”
“Baby girl I ‘ont know what’s going on here, but Jesus is my witness it’s been over a year since I touched any kind of drugs.”
“You’re a fucking liar. You didn’t change; I can’t believe that I thought you did. You made a fucking fool out of me.”
“Sierra, I swear to you I did not do it. I love Azir too much; I would never do that to him.”
“Bitch! I don’t believe shit that comes out of your mouth. Get your shit and get out of my fucking house.”
“Sierra please believe me. I was set up, it ain’t mine,” She pleaded.
“You’re pathetic. I gave you a place to stay for free and this is the thanks I get. Don’t you ever come near me again,” Sierra warned.
I stood there as the situation played out. I never thought she would put her mother out, but it worked out great for me. At least I didn’t have to worry about that bitch breathing down my neck and I could really get into the reason I was there in the first place.
“Sierra, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to cause any type of fuss between you two.”
“Ms. Sadie you have nothing to be sorry about. I am glad you found the drugs and brought it to my attention. She still would’ve been smoking and God knows what would’ve happen to my son while in her care.”
“Yes I understand. We have to protect the babies especially the ones that young.”
A few minutes went by before Jeanette walked down the stairs with a few black trash bags in her hands. She placed them by the door and walked into the living room and approached me.
“You did this to me, you evil bitch! I see all through your lies, I promise you whatever your motives are if you even breathe too hard on my child and my grandchild. I will beat you down like a common bitch.”
“I’m sorry you feel this way. I advise you to seek some help. Crack is a serious drug.” I said, then got up and walked off.
Sierra must’ve heard her because she walked toward the door and opened it.
“Let’s go, stop blaming everyone else for your fuck
up.”
She grabbed her bags and stormed through the door while tears were rolling down her face.
“Watch that bitch with your baby.”
“Bye Jeanette, go live your life,” Sierra said and closed the door.
I sensed that she was upset over the situation. She turned around and walked up the stairs.
“Yes! Mission was accomplished,” I mumbled under my breath.
Chapter Eighteen
Sierra Rogers
I really questioned God a lot. I wanted to know why I was cursed from the time of birth until now. I can’t recall one time in life when I was happy without drama. After all the stress that I was going through with Alijah, it got even worse when the babysitter found crack cocaine in my baby’s crib. I really thought Jeanette had changed and was no longer on drugs. Shit, that heifer behaved like she was enrolled in NA meetings. She had my black ass fooled.
I was grateful that Ms. Sadie found the drugs and her lies were uncovered. Now I realized why she was so bent on me not hiring that lady; she had a huge secret. I’m going to be honest, I felt bad putting her out, but I had no choice. I was not going to allow a crack head in my house and definitely not around my child. I would hate if I had to put my hands on her so the best thing for both of us was to let her go. She kept telling me I was wrong, but I know her. That was a crack head for you though, always screaming they clean and they’ll try their hardest for you to see things their way. Also I see the program wasn’t helpful because the first step of recovery was acceptance.
***
Ms. Sadie became Azir’s full-time nanny. I even had her staying over some days. I could see that she really enjoyed taking care of him. That helped put my mind at ease when I was gone for long hours. I admit, I called every thirty minutes to check up on him.
Alijah still hasn’t called, but I spoke to his lawyer and he gave me updates on his case. I wrote Alijah a few letters demanding some type of explanation to his madness. I was livid that he didn’t call to check on his son.
I was ok in the daytime because I kept myself busy, but nights when Azir was asleep and I was alone; I cried my heart out. I love that man and I wish none of that bullshit would’ve happened and it’s worse since he cut off our only way of communicating. I didn’t care if he’s locked up. When I do talk to him; I will be digging in his ass, trust that!
I had so many things to tackle. Top of the list was the safe with the money. I needed to get it out of the house, but I had no idea what I was going to do with it. I can’t walk in a bank and deposit a few million, which would look suspicious. I had to figure something out soon. I wasn’t too sure that the law was not investigating me and I could not risk them running up in the house and confiscating the money. For the time being, my basement was the safest place and I kept the door locked at all times.
***
One day I pulled up to my house just as soon as the mailman was delivering mail. He stopped at my box so I got out of the car and took the mail from him. Most of it was bills and junk mail; there was also a letter from Alijah. I opened the front door, hurried up the stairs and closed my bedroom door. I sat on the bed and opened the envelope. He started off apologizing for his actions, he wanted me to kiss his son and then he got into how I should move on with my life because they’re going to give him life. I was lost for words when I read the part where he told me that Saleem was a federal agent. “HELL NO!” I screamed out. There’s no way that was possible. He was Alijah’s confidant and biggest supporter. I was lost at that point; the game has no loyalty. In the letter he also told me that he wrote me numerous letters without any reply. I was puzzled at that statement because this was the first letter I got since he decided not to have visits. He also explained that he wanted me to stay away because he didn’t want my name to be mixed up in all the things that were going on.
I sat on the edge of the bed crying. I knew he did lots of fucked up things, but he did not deserve all that was being done to him. Most of his crew was snakes, they were out to bring him down and they succeeded at it. I noticed he did not mention Shayna because she was the one that I was interested in, I was so ready to take that bitch on.
I dried my tears up and walked downstairs and into the living room where Ms. Sadie was singing and rocking Azir.
“Hey hon, how are you feeling?” Ms. Sadie asked out of concern.
I looked at her, “I’m fine, I want to ask you; have you been getting the mail from the mailbox?”
“I’ve only gotten the mail a few times and I placed it on the kitchen counter.” Ms. Sadie answered quickly as she continued to rock Azir.
“Ok ‘cause Azir’s dad has been writing me and I haven’t gotten one letter.”
“That’s strange; it might be the neighborhood kids messing with your mail.” Ms. Sadie replied without skipping a beat.
“Yea maybe, I’ve never had that problem before. Ok thanks.”
“Anytime dear.”
There was something in my gut telling me that she wasn’t being truthful. I’ve always kept my eyes on her face, there was some familiarity. I wish I could remember where we’ve met before. She said we’ve never met but I know we had, I just can’t put my finger on it. Another thing that I’ve noticed was when I first interviewed her for the position she had a thick Southern accent, but earlier when I spoke to her she had an up North accent. Hmm...two different accents—she’s not fooling me. People only disguise their voice when they have something to hide.
Ms. Sadie what’s your story? What are you hiding? Whatever skeletons you have in your closet will be discovered by me one way or another.
Chapter Nineteen
Alijah Jackson
My trial date was steadily approaching; I decided to not accept any kind of plea deal that the government was offering. It was a fucking joke to me. They were offering thirty to forty five years in federal prison if I plead guilty. Hell nah! I wasn’t copping out even though I knew the odds were against me. I was willing to take my chances with the jurors. I was also going into it well aware that they had a ninety five percent conviction rate. My lawyer was against going to trial, but what he wanted didn’t really matter. It was my life so I made the call.
I wrote Sierra multiple letters and got no response. I figured that she tight with a nigga because I didn’t want a visit. Shit that’s how I was feeling, I’m a dude, but I was hurting inside. I decided to write her one last letter telling her that she needed to move on. Reality was I might be gone so I didn’t want to be locked down and have to worry about who she fucking or which nigga she had around my seed. It was best that I pull myself away before, so later it won’t be that hard for the both of us.
I spoke to Mom-dukes and she was so heart broken when I told her I was locked up. She cried through the entire conversation and told me she will be there for my trial. I ain’t going to front when I got back in my cell I broke down. I hate to hear my mom cry and it was harder now because I wasn’t there to console her.
The rest of the day went by slowly as usual; exercise, cards and rapping with the homie was an everyday routine. Lights were out at eleven as usual. Whenever the block got quiet, my mind tends to race and that night was no different.
I heard the guards holla “count time” and keys started to rattle. These motherfuckas never care if niggas were already asleep. They barged up on tier loud and disrespectful. I closed my eyes so I could let my mind wander far away from all the chaos. I heard my cell door popped open. I jumped on my feet, but was blindsided by the bright lights from a couple of flashlights. I felt a sharp jab in my left rib, a couple of others followed. Tape was placed over my mouth, I tried to fight back, but I was in no shape and I was out numbered. I began to lose lots of blood.
Shayna Jackson
The feds were riding my ass about getting more information about Sierra. They wanted something they could go after her with and also for me to get information about Alijah’s money. The bitch barely spoke of her personal life so how did they expect me to get
that information? I had my own plan; I just had to figure a way to execute it without getting caught.
The other day I was alone as usual so I got to snooping. I was always curious as to why the basement door stayed locked. I waited until she left for work. I was happy that I knew how to pick locks so I opened the door and made my way down the stairs. I looked around; it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. It was a finished basement. I was turning around to leave when I saw what looked like a door that was in a weird place for a closet. My curiosity got the best of me so I opened the door and there it was, a built in hidden safe. I took a closer look and realized that unless I had the code it was humanly impossible to pop it open. I had a feeling that was where Alijah had the majority of his money hidden. I closed the door and hurried back upstairs. I needed to figure out a way to get in that safe.
Sierra made it home and I was eager to leave. I needed to get in my hotel where I could sit back and figure out a way to approach the situation. After all I was still the Mrs. and I deserved everything that man owned, not her and that lil’ bastard. We chatted for a little while before I left out the door and I got into my car. I planned to go back the next day bright and early with a plan.
I arrived at the hotel and as usual I had to call and check in with them. That bitch Rozarrio was still breathing down my neck like I was not doing enough.
“I need you to dig deeper in her life,” She yelled.
“I don’t know what you want me to do. I try talking to her, but she doesn’t say much.”
“Mrs. Jackson, I don’t think you understand that it’s either you or her and I would want to think that you would choose the latter.”
“Listen I am tired of you holding that shit over my head, why you don’t get your ass in there and get whatever it is that you want for your damn self? I am done dealing with you so do whatever the fuck you want.” I screamed.
“Lower your voice.” Rozarrio fired back, “this is an order! I will throw your ass in jail and won’t think twice about it. You have one damn week to get in there and get me the information about where all Alijah’s money is and how much information she knew about his business. You have until five o’clock Friday evening,” She said and hung up the phone.
Bottom Bitch Rises Page 16
