by Margaret Way
Olivia walked about the darkening barn making a determined effort to shift the melancholy in her breast. The promises she and Jason had made then! He had been her knight in shining armour.
Some knight.
If she had to weep, she had to do it silently inside. How strange life was! No one could control it. The trick was to cope, hang on survive. Megan Duffy, the girl she had felt so sorry for, had betrayed her yet now she was looking out for the interests of Megan Duffy’s child. Tali after all was the innocent victim.
Olivia started and turned swiftly as a savage crack of thunder shook the walls. Moments later a great flash of incandescent lightning dazzled her eyes. She moved towards the centre of the barn, the safest place. No use making a run for it to the house. She had waited too long—she’d have to stay until the worst of the downpour was over. She felt quite unafraid—she’d lived through countless tropical storms. Cyclones were another matter entirely—extremely dangerous and destructive winds could reach to nearly 300 km/h at the centre of a cyclone. Even now in what would be a short electrical storm strong gusts of wind were blowing in the one door she’d left open, the double doored entry.
As she ran to shut it, rain began belting against the east wall, the one facing the not far distant Coral Sea. It was growing gloomier within the barn but she knew better than to turn on the electricity.
She was almost at the entry when a lean, powerful figure literally blew in with the force of the wind, shaking the rain from his hair and his face. His sudden appearance shocked Olivia so much a keening sound issued from her throat.
“Jason, you startled me!” she gasped. “Where did you come from?”
He was wearing a hip length hooded raincoat that he swiftly stripped off him and hung on a hook. “Out of the rain obviously. Surely you don’t mean me to go out again?” he openly mocked. “It’s pouring, haven’t you noticed. The lightning is pretty fierce as well.”
Little did he know she was one heart beat away from running out into the gale away from him. What had really caused Jason to come here now? Strong as he was, he had some difficulty battling the strong gusts to shut both doors, throwing the bolt to prevent the wind from blasting them open again. “It’ll be over shortly so don’t panic.”
“Storms don’t frighten me,” she said curtly, to control the nervousness in her voice. Streams of water like liquid silver were pouring down every window and every set of glass panelled doors.
“Which, of course, wasn’t what I meant.”
“I’m not frightened of you, either.” She looked at him quickly, looked away at the billowing storm. Now the violence of the storm was within her. It was so claustrophobic inside the huge barn Olivia drew a desperate breath into her lungs. She prayed what she was feeling wasn’t showing on her face. At the same time she had the sickening feeling it was.
“Who’s keeping an eye on Tali?” he asked.
“Why ask? Grace, of course. I’ve only been gone ten minutes or so.”
“What are you doing here?”
“As if I need to tell you,” she retorted.
“I’m only asking a question, that’s all. How did you go with Robyn by the way?”
With every question he was moving closer. His big-cat grace struck her not for the first time his father had been the same. She stared at him with involuntary fascination.
“It went well,” she said, taking comfort in the fact her voice was quite steady. “I liked her and I liked her ideas. I’m sure catering for our Christmas party is well within her capabilities. Should that turn out differently I’ll have you to blame.”
“That seems to be my grim fate.” His handsome mouth took a downward curve.
Another blinding fork of lightning, its power awesome, lit up the dim interior like it was centre stage.
“Oh, hell!” she fretted. Look beyond him her inner voice advised. The storm would soon be over and she could flee.
“Is it so hard to be alone with me, Liv?” he asked quietly. “I can’t help but see your agitation. I’m not going to push you beyond your limits.”
“And what are they?” she asked, tossing up her dark head. “Just what agitations are on display, Jason? It’s the storm that’s making me uncomfortable.”
“That’s hard to believe, you’ve seen a heck of a lot worse than this.” He shrugged, obviously not believing her. “We lived through Cyclone Amy remember?”
“All right. All right!” Despite herself she lost her cool. “I don’t want to be here with you, Jason, you’re right about that. I can’t stop the way you get under my skin, I can’t eradicate my memories, either, though. I’ve tried.”
“You think my memories don’t weigh me down?” he countered, moving ever closer to her. The sleekness and strength, the magnificent insouciance.
“What are you doing here in this place?” He looked around, his blue eyes moody in his striking face. “I hate coming in here.”
“I’m not surprised,” she said with bitter humour. “Harry spent a fortune doing it up for us.”
“Harry was the most generous man in the world.”
“He loved you well enough didn’t he? Half a million— I don’t care about that—I’ve come to see you made many times that for Harry—probably for yourself as well—because you’re smart, Jason. We all knew that.”
He stared into her face, his expression suggesting his own temper was rising. “Are you trying to say I manipulated myself into Harry’s affections along with his affairs? Harry was my friend, Olivia. I know he was bitterly disappointed and shocked at what I did, but I’ve done my time.”
“What, four years?” She raised delicate black brows. “That was a pretty light sentence.”
“Not if you knew Megan,” he said, the line of his mouth distorted by the grimness of his memories. “Megan had real problems.”
“I imagine most women would have a real problem living with a man who didn’t love them,” Olivia said.
“All the more reason for her to love her child,” Jason spoke curtly. “If Megan hadn’t left of her own accord I would have been driven to throw her out. It was getting so I was desperately worried about leaving Tali with her. Megan found it only too easy to take her frustrations out on a small child. Jack Duffy was a violent man. I guess Megan and Sean, let alone that poor worn woman he married, were on the receiving end of Duffy’s black moods. That sort of behaviour, unfortunately, can get passed on.”
Olivia dipped her head, swallowing on the hard knot in her throat. “Why did I ever ask her to be one of my bridesmaids,” she questioned with deep regret. “Not that that would have changed anything. Of course she was in love with you, Jason.” She looked up to meet his eyes. “Some part of me knew that, but then all the girls were in love with you. I didn’t pay sufficient attention. You were mine. My love had transformed you into something you weren’t.”
“To hell with that!” he said explosively. “I’m tired of your heavy judgements, Liv. People make mistakes. You’re not the sweetly tender girl I remember, you’ve grown cruel and sharp. Maybe you can tell me how the hell Megan developed such a crush on me?” he asked in extreme irritation. “I can’t remember a damned thing I ever did that would have given her the slightest encouragement.”
“Why didn’t you ask her, not me?” His insults had stung her.
“She told me she couldn’t remember when she wasn’t in love with me,” he admitted in the bleakest tones. “Megan Duffy! She fooled us all.”
“She certainly fooled me,” Olivia replied, lifting her voice above the raging storm. “You do have Tali, however…you have a daughter, a very special little girl. She could have been mine. I’ll be twenty-seven next birthday, I thought I’d have probably two children by now. I’ve lost years, Jason, because of you. I wanted to have my children when I was young.”
He let his eyes move over every feature of her face. So beautiful! Eyes the colour of silver, mouth the colour of crushed strawberries. Only sheer force of will prevented him from pulling her
into his arms. “You’re not going to tell me twenty-seven is too old?” he asked, his expression challenging.
“I can’t have a child by a man I don’t love, Jason,” she said simply. “I don’t love anyone. Love has seeped right out of me.”
His half smile was tight. “I can’t believe you haven’t had other men in your life, Liv. You’re a beautiful, passionate woman.”
“I was a passionate woman,” she corrected, shaking her head. “Let me ask you. Are you and Megan divorced?”
“Of course we’re divorced,” he clipped off. “Megan took off with some guy that worked on the station. She’s probably moved in with someone else in the meantime. Megan wasn’t the quiet, submissive little person she appeared to be, that was a front. The real Megan you could write into a soap opera.”
Olivia had no lingering doubts about that. “How do you know she won’t come back into your life at some point demanding Tali back?’
“Olivia, Megan dumped her child like—”
“You dumped me?” It shot out before she knew it.
“You couldn’t resist that, could you? The facts are I didn’t dump you for a girl I was mad about. I got blind drunk and made Megan Duffy of all people pregnant. I just have to consider, too, brother Sean or one of his stupid friends could have spiked my drink. They’d see that as a huge joke. Let’s take Corey down a peg. Megan won’t come back—she told me plainly enough she didn’t want to be saddled with a child, any child.”
“Then she should have avoided pregnancy,” Olivia said, the words catching in her throat. “There’s something inherently wrong about a mother not loving her child.”
“Plenty don’t,” Jason said and shook his head. “Mothers harming their children is not that uncommon, sad to say. The trouble with you is you haven’t lived in the real world, Olivia. You’re still the princess in the ivory tower.”
“Well this princess isn’t living happily ever after,” Olivia pointed out, the expression on her face betraying her intensity. “Oh!” She jumped in reaction, as another great thunderhead exploded like a bomb. “I want to get out of here.”
“Settle down.” He stared at her as she backed away.
“Excuse me? You’re not looking all that calm.”
A searing white light more blinding than brilliant sunshine irradiated the barn again. Olivia, her nerves stretched taut, made a dash for the door. She didn’t care if she got soaked, struck by lightning, whatever. Panic had taken hold. She couldn’t withstand Jason and she knew it. There was a price to be paid for this kind of obsession.
“Don’t be a fool! Liv, come back.” He caught her up and without thinking spun her into his arms. Such multilayered disturbances were within him, such lavish arousal it was impossible for him not to lower his head, covering her mouth with his, stifling her shocked exhalation.
“Why do I want you,” he muttered, moving his mouth back and forth over her exquisitely supple lips. “You, always you.” He forced her head back into the crook of his shoulder so he could kiss her long curving throat. “Judge and executioner!”
Tears stung her eyes. Was that what she was to him? Everywhere he touched her scorched. His hand on her breast was molten, her nipples rising into full bud, excruciatingly sensitive. Pain accompanying pleasure. She was trembling in his powerful embrace, aware of the hard brush of his arousal against her. His fingers were sliding through her long hair as they used to, knotting a handful to gain hold of her head so he could kiss her more deeply. He was pulling her up to him, into him, effortlessly. She wasn’t even sure if her feet touched he polished floor. She could feel her own high voltage response, the involuntary clutches and clawings deep in her womb.
Was it passion or a kind of male-female warfare? He only had to touch her and she caved in. This man who had walked out then back into her life. It wasn’t to be borne.
He wanted her to submit completely, that’s what he wanted. The primacy of the dominant male wasn’t just talk. He thought he owned her. She arched herself back against his steely arms, but it only brought her pelvis and her throbbing mound into more intimate contact with his sex. The bloodrush to her core! For long moments she was lost in a perverse wildness, grinding her body against his, her flesh mocking her will, her rhythms fully attuned to his.
She felt white-hot with desire, dismayed and transported by her own abandon. She had the feeling he wouldn’t stop until he had complete domination. Wasn’t that what she really wanted? He made it all so easy.
Seduction.
And she wasn’t the only woman to enjoy it.
The thought cleared her brain as quickly as if someone had run at her with a vial of smelling salts. Jason had to suffer for what he had done to her. The wasted years! They could never have them back. He made love so marvellously she’d been lulled even momentarily into thinking he still loved her.
What blindness! What carelessness with her body. She understood how passion strung even the most cautious along ruining lives. Jason hadn’t been celibate all these years. He’d had women in his bed, naked in the darkness, loving them, teasing their nipples with his teeth; whispering endearments as he plunged deep into them until they near fainted with rapture. Probably Robyn Nelson was one of his conquests. Nice Robyn who blushed at the very mention of his name. Who could blame her!
“Damn you, Jason! Stop it! Be done!” Shocked by her own action Olivia twisted her dark head and nipped at his golden throat with her teeth, in the next instant feeling sick. She had no idea she could bring herself to do such a primitive thing. That wasn’t a playful nip. It was like a tigress warning its mate.
He gave the tiniest little yelp. It sounded more amused than angry. “Darling, Liv,” he drawled, “you never cease to amaze me. What are you trying to do, raise blood?”
“I shouldn’t have done that. It was horrible.” It was the closest she was going to get to an apology.
“So don’t do that again. It’s actually more of a turn-on than anything else.”
His arms were twined around her waist, his male strength formidable. “Let go, Jason,” she gritted, her face opalescent in the gloom.
He pulled her closer. They might have been fused together. “My Liv! The girl I loved and lost.”
“This is insanity.”
“More like Heaven!” He half laughed. “What’s insane about a man and a woman wanting each other? You’re absolutely wonderful to make love to. I suppose if I’d married you, you’d have sent me to an early grave. There is such a thing as too much wild sex.”
“Not in my life,” she flared, waiting for the trembling in her body to subside. Rain was still pelting at the windows and doors though the volume of sound on the roof had lessened. With a great effort she wrenched herself away from him, stepping back, gasping, swaying a bit, angered when she saw his expression soften. She didn’t want any tenderness from him, now or ever! “Did you see me come in here?” she demanded. “Tell the truth.”
“Say what?” He feigned perplexity.
“Tell me the truth.” She looked him straight in his burning blue eyes.
“No, Liv.” Those eyes were mocking. “I don’t like making a fool of myself any more than you do. But hell, when we’re alone what else can we do? So you’re ashamed you still react the same way? I can’t seem to find a solution any more than you can. I want you—what’s more I’m going to have you—we both know that. It’s our weakness, Liv, I guess we have to live with it. Now before I drag you back into my arms like the caveman you turn me into, I’m going to find my way up to the house to pick up my Tali. You can stay here and watch me go.”
“Goodbye then!” She flashed him a glance out of her large, luminous eyes. How could she be so angry, yet teetering on the brink of tears? “How many other women do you actually tell all that stuff to?” she asked scornfully.
“Only you, princess.” He shouldered into his raincoat, saluted her. Then he was gone into the pouring rain.
CHAPTER SEVEN
FOR the Christmas party Oli
via wore a dress of red silk. She didn’t wear a lot of red, though when she did people always told her how much it suited her, but it was Christmas and scarlet was one of the traditional Christmas colours.
The camisole bodice of the short party dress was held by spaghetti straps, the skirt lavishly decorated with scarlet beads and small blue daisies sequinned with yellow at the centre. Her dark hair was down, brushed over her shoulders and held back by a pair of very fancy combs studded with multicoloured crystals. Her legs were bare in the heat. She wore strappy high heeled sandals the same colour as her dress. She knew she’d be a little more dressed up than her guests, but then she was the hostess and she had nothing else with her in festive colours.
She always took care with what she wore, adhering to the classic elegance of silk blouses and slim skirts for school with a matching jacket for the cooler weather. It was nice to wear something striking for a change. She remembered with sadness and affection Harry had always liked her in red. He said the colour showed off her skin and her eyes. Once it had been such a delight, such an excitement to dress, to make herself beautiful for Jason. His blue eyes on her, the expression in them bringing a flush to her cheeks, raising the beat of her heart. Jason, of course, would be at the party tonight.
Olivia pulled the drapes aside and stood at an upstairs window looking out over the rear garden. Very shortly the first of the guests would be arriving. The grounds looked marvellous, a radiance of white fairy lights strung out on the trees. The Christmas tree on the terrace soared twenty feet to the purplish-black velvet sky. Tonight the sky was dominated not by the stars, but by the full copper moon of the tropics over which it sailed. The lightest breeze was blowing, suspending the sweet fragrance of all summer’s flowers in the warm air. The marquees, two to either side, one set back in the middle were white with a green trim on the scalloped sides. The marquee in the middle was set with circular tables and chairs, the chairs decorated with big tartan bows in red, green and gold, the tables alternating red and green tablecloths and napkins. Everything looked wonderful, she felt good about it.
