by Adalynn Rafe
Here is some money for food. No large parties please.
With love,
Mom and Dad
Dread. That’s all I felt after reading the note. Hazel’s car was there and that meant that she had to be there as well.
“She’s fine,” I said out loud. “She is just taking a rest, I’m sure.” That didn’t mean that I didn’t doubt the words I said.
After climbing the staircase, leaving no trace of a living soul, I inched through the dark hallway slowly. The star-shaped night light at the end gave me hope for Hazel. Maybe she was just fine and I was being paranoid.
Nearly freezing, the house had shut down and had gone to sleep. That meant that Hazel was too sick to even get out of bed and turn the heat on in the cold winter night. My chest hurt as I thought about seeing her so down. Please, please, please be fine, Hazel!
I stopped at her door. “Kelly, I kinda need you here with me,” I said in a whisper. This was too hard for me to face alone.
Nothing happened. Kelly wasn’t available. Pushing my fears aside, I stepped through the door and into Hazel’s room. The moonlight lit up her bed and the lump that lay in the middle of it. Hazel was in that lump of pillows and blankets—hopefully just sleeping.
Hazel let out a moan. Reaching her hand out of her blanket, she dropped it on her nightstand tiredly as she reached for something. After knocking a bag of drugs out of the way, she found it: a locket containing pictures of her and me.
“Cecily,” she said, winded. “You said you’d sing to me.”
My heart stopped. She couldn’t be dying. I refused such a thought.
She let out another moan. “Ces, I can’t do this anymore.”
“No––no. You can, Haze, I know you can!” I yelled desperately.
“It’s not your fault, Ces. Please forgive me.” Hazel doubled over into a ball and screamed, her face turning even more pale, more ghastly. “It’s my fault that I’m like this!”
Tears filled my eyes as I sat on the bed beside her. She was past being really sick—her eyes sunken, her temperature roaring. Once rosy lips now were dark purple. Even her golden hair had lost its luster.
“I shoulda . . . I shoulda had that child, Ces. Now, I’m dying.”
I felt like someone had broken a bottle in my chest and now the pieces of glass were being pushed into my muscles and lungs. I was dead! I wasn’t supposed to feel pain like this anymore!
Hazel disappeared as the room spun around me. The moonlight was replaced by artificial light, but only over one spot. It illuminated a table, a patient soundly under anesthesia. I stood in an operation room, which quite frankly, felt as cold as the morgue.
Monitors beeped and hissed rhythmically behind the patient. A light shined down upon the operating table, and beside the table stood a tray of tools, silver and gleaming. The doctor entered through room, fully equipped in a surgeons garb, including protective glasses and a face mask. He snapped his glove loudly, announcing his arrival.
The technicians checked the machines one last time as the anesthesiologist gave the doctor a worried thumbs up to continue forward with the operation. I don’t think that a worried thumbs up is a good thing . . .
After everything was in check, the doctor began to cut into the person.
I hesitantly stepped over to the table. Upon the blue sheets laid a princess as fair as any. She did not live in a palace and she had never found her prince, but she was still a beloved princess. Brown hair ran in two braids behind her head. I ignored the skeletal look of her face.
“Hey! This isn’t how the transplant goes!” I yelled, trying to stop the doctor from mutilating her torso. “Hey!” She wasn’t supposed to have actual surgery! It was supposed to be through blood transfusion!
No use. They were going to do what they were going to do.
I looked down at my big sister. “Princess Adie,” I whispered. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t choke back the tears. “Everything is going to be okay.”
The doctor ordered a tool. I stared at him with involuntary anger. It wasn’t his fault what happened next.
Patiently, I rubbed Adie’s forehead as I watched the surgery take place. In real life, I would have easily puked. But now, this was where I needed to be. Blood didn’t seem to matter to me anymore.
You could say that it was part of the whole calm before the storm thingy.
Thirty minutes into surgery I heard a horrible noise. The heart rate monitor flat lined and made the most horrific sound. Then, another machine went off and another. Soon enough, machines were beeping and screaming and people were frantically trying to fix my sister.
Calmly, I allowed the tears to stream down my face as my chest filled with the broken pieces of glass once more. Gently, I rubbed my sister’s head and hair, pretending that there was no one there but the two of us.
The anger I felt for the doctor had subsided, now replaced with remorse.
She was gone now. She’d finally be free of her pain. I stared down at her paled and exhausted face, creaseless of any wrinkles or scarring. Adie looked perfect, flawless. “I love you, sister,” I whispered.
My world spun back to Hazel. There I stood in the dark room, sitting on the edge of her bed once again, as if I had never left. I was still crying from losing Adie!
I crawled in bed next to Hazel and held her in my arms. Her breathing sounded shallow and fast. Violent shivers escaped her body and rattled the entire bed.
“You always reminded me of a goddess.” I laughed and cried at the same time. “Your golden hair is totally like a goddess’s.”
Hazel’s dull eyes filled with tears. She could still cry. Staring past me, she just cried.
She felt so real in my arms. I held her tightly to my chest and rested my head on hers. Tears streamed from my eyes as I repeatedly kissed her forehead to remind her that she was loved.
“I never found the angels,” I sang to her in a very low voice.
Hazel gasped before she started agonizingly screaming.
I continued to sing, even though my voice shook and tears stung my eyes, “In the eyes of evil was I found . . .”
Hazel clenched her stomach as she moaned and pleaded.
“Even with the light shining in,” I cleared my throat, “I am still lost and never to found.”
I watched the color drain from my best friends face as she cried.
“Shh.” I sniffled. “It’s okay. Death isn’t that scary, Haze, trust me. I know.”
Hazel’s eyes opened wide and I swear that she looked straight at me. She clenched her chest and stomach, shaking violently. Tears of fear streamed down my face as I watched her die. Then, as if it never happened, she stopped moving completely.
Her green eyes stared lifelessly at me.
“I––I––love you––,” I mumbled between sobs. “Hazel . . .”
Chapter 22
My world appeared so foggy. Who knew where I was headed, but I went regardless. Tears still streamed down my face as I stumbled through the gray fog.
Was I finally in Hell? Where I belonged?
The barking of a mongrel proved that I wasn’t. Not unless Bandit had come to free me from my purgatory.
“Bandit?” I whispered.
Kelly came running toward me with Bandit in tow. He was relieved and smiling; his arms wide open and ready to embrace me. That only made me cry more!
“Kelly!” I started sobbing.
Comforting arms wrapped around me and he caressed my hair softly.
“They’re dead,” I said, my voice shaky. “Hazel and Adie.” My knees buckled beneath me and I fell to the floor slowly, held tightly in Kelly’s arms.
“I’m sorry, Cecily. I wish we could take it back.”
I gathered the white fabric of his shirt in my fists. “I want to take it back, Kelly! I want them to live! I even prayed for them!” I began to hysterically sob again as my head dropped to my chest.
Kelly held my head in his hands and kissed my forehead tenderly. “I’m
so sorry . . .”
“My selfishness killed them,” I confessed. “Without me there, they didn’t have a chance!” I lost my cool again and started to weep, my heart shattering.
He held me close. “It is okay, Cecily.”
I shook my head. “No, it’s not! They are dead!” Anger filled me now.
Concerned, Kelly nodded. “You’re right, they are dead. I’m sorry.”
Placing my head on his chest, I let out a pained whimper and closed my eyes.
“Cecily, look!” Kelly gasped.
My eyes opened to find the most glorious sight I had ever seen. It was Earth. Beside it, Mars. Then I saw Saturn. Jupiter. Neptune. Pluto. Dwarf planets. My bets were that Venus and Mercury were hiding behind Earth. All of the planets were lined up perfectly. Then there was the Sun, glorious and beautiful, sending rays of invisible radiation through space.
“Look down,” Kelly whispered.
Golden dust surrounded us, forming into a magical bridge, a walkway of sorts, for as long as I could see. The gold shined vibrantly against the black background of outer space.
“What is this?” I asked Kelly, watching a comet pass by us. A tail of blue flame and rocks trailed behind it.
Kelly’s eyes widened with fascination. “I’ve never seen such a sight.”
“That’s the planet Mars,” I said, pointing towards the red planet. “You didn’t know that, did you?”
He shook his head. “This is astounding! What are these . . . planets?”
I named them off to him and then laughed. He was definitely from the 1940’s and I was from the 21st century. He didn’t see Sputnik or the Apollo missions.
“Is this real? Or did you dream it up?” Kelly asked me.
A smile filled my face, though sad. “This is real, Kelly.”
Exhilaration filled his blue eyes. “I never knew this. Cecily, think of the things we can learn, the things we can do now! There are no limits here, at all!”
In the distance, a man in white appeared on our golden bridge. We’d never seen another being like us in this realm. It scared me. What if he took Kelly away and all I was left with was Bandit and no air?
Nodding, tears of fear filled my eyes once more as I stared at the man. “There are no limits,” I whispered.
“Young ones,” he yelled to us, a hint of German accent lingering on his words.
I clung to Kelly tighter than I had ever clung to anything.
“Ah, yes, I know you.” He pointed to me, but I still couldn’t see him clearly. “Once upon a time a small baby was born. The proud parents, Luca and Nina, and proud sister, Adie, welcomed her into the world. Little did that child know, she would become the savior of her sister and the heartstrings of her father.”
My expression froze completely. “Do you know Luca?” I asked the man in a stunned whisper. My sweaty palms were wiped on my white dress.
He kept moving toward us, and with a whistle, Bandit appeared beside him. His face became clearer and brighter as he neared us. My strong Papa, brown eyes and brown hair, deceased yet living, stood before me with a gentle smile on his face.
My heart could take no more. Lifting my hands to my face, I began bawling hysterically. Kelly left my side but my Papa was there in no time, soothing me with his words and holding me in his protective arms once more.
“Papa,” I whispered, finally looking at him. Touching his face, I gasped at the sight. He was real! “Papa!”
He smiled and nodded and I jumped into his arms, squeezing his neck as to never let go.
“Where have you been, Papa?” I asked him, still crying.
“Oh, sweet Cecily, I have been with you,” he said softly, releasing me to the golden bridge once more.
“No, you haven’t. I haven’t seen you once, Papa!”
“Just because you don’t see me, doesn’t mean I’m not there,” he reminded. “Since the day I left, I’ve kept a firm eye on you, my little one.”
Guilt filled me and I couldn’t look at him in the eye. “Are you disappointed in me?”
Papa laughed, just like I remembered. “Of course not. You have taken a bump, but you are a fine young woman, Cecily, just as we raised you to be.”
“Papa, have you seen Adie?” I asked him quietly, tears automatically filling my eyes. “Or Hazel?”
His hand held my cheek tenderly and his brown eyes filled with tears. “No, I haven’t. But I know where they are.”
Hope sparked inside of me. He knew where they were. “Take me to them, Papa, I must say sorry at once! I’m the reason they died, it’s my fault!” My voice cracked with emotion. “Where are they?”
“You can’t see them, my baby girl,” Papa said emotionally, “you’ve come to join me too soon and you must go home.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Cecily, you aren’t supposed to be here. You’re supposed to be there.” Kelly pointed toward the round Earth.
“And fix the wrong before it becomes permanent,” Papa added. “You’re the answer to your own prayer, Cecily.” I didn’t understand. Papa became serious as he stared at me. “You are needed there, not only by your sister or Hazel, but by many others. Without you, bad things are going to happen to good people, Cecily.”
I stared at the Earth as my vision blurred. “Are people going to die, Papa?”
Both Kelly and Papa stared at the Earth. They didn’t have to vocalize the answer; I could see it in their faces. “Don’t be scared,” Papa whispered. “You’re strong, like your father.”
“Kelly,” I whispered, reaching for him. “What about you?”
“Cecily, when Kelly and I died, it was meant to be. Our time had come and we accepted that. When you died, it was not your time. You weren’t supposed to die on that ledge,” Papa explained. “And, because of your death, a ripple effect has formed and many others will be hurt, the ones that you are supposed to save . . .”
My words stammered as I talked, my heart hurt in my chest, my cheeks soaked with salty tears. “What’s going to happen to them? To—to—me?”
Papa held my head in his hands. “Baby, you must hold on. You must be strong. You have to be brave now.” He kissed my forehead tenderly. “I’ll always be with you, Cecily.”
“Don’t go! Please!” I begged him, clenching his white shirt. “Papa, please don’t leave me alone again!”
“I love you very much,” he promised as he stepped back. He looked at Kelly and motioned for him to make it quick.
“I will always love you,” Kelly promised as he hugged me tightly.
“I love you, Kelly. I’ll never know love again.”
Kelly smiled. “I believe you will. You’ll find your one true love, you just have to wait.”
“What about you?”
“You’ll always be my one true love,” he promised.
We softly kissed in front of Papa, and he didn’t seem to mind.
“See that star, Cecily?” Papa asked, pointing to a large pink star.
“Yes, Papa,” I answered, still shaky with tears.
He smiled at me. “That is the star called Diamond Heart, the star that belongs to Cecily Wolf. It’s my gift to you.”
Grinning, I hugged him tightly. “Thank you, Papa.”
Bandit tugged at my leg and barked. Laughing yet crying, I bent down and petted his head. “Goodbye, mongrel.” Bandit released a small whimper.
I looked at my father, serious now. “Will I remember any of this?”
He smiled. “I doubt that you will remember the specifics, but you may remember the feelings.”
“What if I repeat my mistake and end up here again?”
Papa rested his hand on my shoulder. “When the time comes, you’ll understand.”
I grabbed Papa’s hand as to never let go. “I’m scared.”
“You’ll be home soon, Cecily. There are a few more things you must see.” Papa kissed my forehead softly. “I love you.” After that, he let go of me and walked away from us, Bandit by his side. �
��I will always be with you, sweet daughter of mine.”
Kelly pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around me tightly. “Stay strong, Cecily Wolf. You are an amazing woman.”
Our lips met as I kept my eyes open. The stars around me blurred past me, as if I were falling from a tall perch in outer space. Kelly’s soft eyes smiled once more and suddenly I felt ripped away from him and thrown into darkness. My eyes closed, but forever in my mind would they remain staring into the loving eyes of Kelly.
Chapter 23
Darkness surrounded me and I was all alone. A chill etched down my spine, rippling through my body. Ice crystals sat on my breath; I felt them on the warm palm of my hand. Darkness was all I saw, all I could comprehend of this new found dungeon.
I knew one thing: It wasn’t Hell. Papa wouldn’t allow it.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I waited for my eyes to adjust to my black surroundings. My other senses kicked in and, aside from being freezing, the air smelled familiar. Not a good familiar. It made my stomach drop horribly.
Coal—it smelled like the black deposit that gave my father cancer.
That explained where I had landed. It had to be a mine, possibly even one that Papa worked in.
I exhaled loudly and tried to gather all the bravery within me before stepping forward, following the rusted tracks. My instinct said to move forward, though I wasn’t sure if it would lead me to light and freedom or just deeper into the old coal mine.
My hands reached out and touched the walls. The stone had been chiseled and large gashes and scrapes remained on the rocky surface. What it must’ve been like to work in these mines, all day, every day. What it must have been like to be Papa, dying slowly here.
To pierce the deadly silence, I began humming a song that he used to sing to us. I could only hum the melody—it reminded me of a calm ocean—because the words were German. I was horrible at speaking or singing German. A small laugh escaped me as I thought about when Adie tried to sing the song. She had sounded like a goose.
Frozen in place, I swore I heard something—like a muffled cry. Could it be human?
