by Lisa Carter
A child posthumously conceived from her late husband’s stored sperm before Mateo began chemotherapy. But Anna was tired of explaining herself.
“Mine.” She raised her chin. “The child is mine, Ryan.”
He scrubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know what to say to you, Anna.”
“Say that you’re my friend.” Her mouth trembled. “Say that you understand.”
“But I don’t understand, Anna. Why are you— What did your dad say when you got home?”
Her eyes dropped to the floor. But because of her protruding belly, she could no longer see her black flats. “Dad and Mom are still at the army base with Jaxon in Europe. They don’t know yet.”
“You haven’t told them?” He gestured at her stomach. “Not exactly something you can hide.”
“I’m not hiding.” She bit her lip. Not anymore.
His broad shoulders slumped. “I was sorry to hear about Jax’s wife.”
“Exactly why I haven’t told my parents. They’ll be home after New Year’s.”
Who could’ve foreseen that she and her older brother, Jaxon, would both be widowed? This first Christmas without his wife, Jax needed their parents’ support. Their undivided attention.
She wasn’t eager to face the disappointment in her beloved father’s eyes. A disappointment not unlike the look on Ryan’s face.
“How did Charlie take the news?”
Charlie was Anna’s youngest brother, a deputy sheriff in town.
She pursed her lips. “I haven’t told him yet. I drove straight across the Bay Bridge Tunnel to school this morning from Virginia Beach.”
“Did you stay overnight with Will?” Ryan’s brow creased. “What did he say?”
A year younger than Anna, her firefighter brother lived on the other side of the bay.
“I made him promise to let me tell the rest of the family in my own time.”
Ryan shook his head. “So you drove all the way from Texas? You must be exhausted, Anna.”
In more ways than he could possibly know. Yet she was compelled by an inexplicable need to come home and mend fences with her family.
She took a breath. “I called Charlie this morning to let him know I was driving straight to work.”
Ryan frowned. “As I recall, your ex–deputy sheriff father doesn’t like surprises. Are you sure springing the baby on them is the best way to handle the situation?”
She tucked a tendril of hair behind her ear. “I wish you’d trust I’ve made the best decision for me and my baby.”
His eyes locked onto hers. “I wish...”
Something fluttered inside her chest. What did he wish?
He pinched his lips together. “Never mind.” Pivoting, he exited the media center as suddenly as he’d reappeared in her life.
She blinked away tears. “Merry Christmas to you, too.”
Why had she believed it would be different here? Brushing aside every obstacle, she’d left everything behind to be home for Christmas. She’d so needed a new start.
If this was any indication of the reception she’d get from her hometown... Her gut wrenched. She’d hoped the people who knew her best and loved her the most would also love this child.
Had she made a mistake in coming home?
Chapter Two
Out in the school parking lot, Ryan regretted his abrupt departure. He wrenched open his car door. There were so many questions he should’ve asked Anna. But he’d been stunned by her pregnancy.
Where was the baby’s father? Why had he left Anna to face her family alone with the news? What kind of man—?
His gut tightened. What sort of friend was he to let her face her family alone? She’d only asked one thing of him. To be her friend. To trust her.
But the pregnancy made no sense. This wasn’t like Anna. Not the Anna Pruitt he remembered. After her husband’s death, had she succumbed to grief or loneliness? Had she changed so much from those long-ago childhood days?
Getting into his car, he drove toward town. He followed Highway 13, which bisected the Delmarva Peninsula of Delaware, Maryland and Virginia into bayside and seaside. The tiny fishing village of Kiptohanock—their hometown—hugged the Atlantic shoreline.
Entering the small hamlet, he looped around the village square. The Waterman’s Association had been busy. Christmas wreaths hung from the gas-powered lanterns on each corner of the green.
Anna’s sister-in-law, Evy, worked in the library on the west side. On the south end of the square stood the white brick volunteer fire department. Ryan parked in the empty parking lot of the Sandpiper Cafe, closed for the evening.
This time of year, he found himself missing his father more than usual. His dad had loved participating in community events.
On the nearby waterfront, commercial and recreational boats bobbed in the marina. The steeple of the white clapboard church pierced the winter sky above the harbor. At the Coast Guard station, flags fluttered in the stiff wind.
The wind off the water would be cold this time of year. Yet his oceanside home rarely saw snow nor, hopefully, none of the more usual ice storms.
What kind of Christmas did Oscar, Maria or Zander look forward to? In less than a month, he’d say goodbye to his classroom and the kids forever.
His hands clenched around the wheel. Which was what he’d worked for—to leave the family on a better financial footing and return to the research he loved.
But the children he’d leave behind tugged at his heart. Even Zander, despite the third grader’s determination to keep everyone at arm’s length. Ryan blew out a breath of air. He’d not foreseen that when he tendered his resignation.
Arm’s length. He’d done the same since changing careers and coming home to help his family. As for seeing Anna again? The rush of emotion had caught Ryan by surprise.
What would happen to kids like Oscar, Maria and Zander after Ryan left the Shore for good?
He throttled the steering column. “This isn’t my problem, God.” But saying that out loud didn’t ease his conscience as he’d hoped.
Ryan released his grip on the wheel and leaned against the seat. The replacement teacher would be fine. The children would be fine. Anna and her baby would be fine.
Would they? Would Ryan? Was there a reason Anna had come into his life now?
Only the sound of shorebirds wheeling above the glittering water of the inlet broke the silence. But he couldn’t shake the memory of the unspoken plea in Anna’s beautiful eyes. To trust her. To understand. To be her friend.
She seemed so sad and alone. First losing her husband and now being a single parent. He shouldn’t have walked away. He needed to apologize. No one should feel that sad or alone, especially at Christmas.
And when her very intimidating ex-deputy dad found out about the baby... Ryan winced. He didn’t envy Anna that conversation.
He spied Seth Duer stuffing something fur-lined and red into the cab of his truck, and Ryan got an idea. He grinned. A surprise not only for the children, but for Anna, too.
* * *
So like their deputy sheriff father, Charlie’s uniformed shoulders hunched in the overstuffed armchair. “Why didn’t you tell us about the baby, Anna?”
Sitting on the sofa in her childhood home, Anna fidgeted. “Because you would’ve tried to talk me out of it.”
Perched on the armrest, Evy dangled her trademark high heels. “And your due date is January 6?” Her smile made her cheeks brush her retro horn-rimmed eyeglasses. “An Old Christmas baby. The Epiphany.”
The glasses reminded Anna of Ryan. She’d expected too much from a childhood friend she hadn’t seen in years. She’d underestimated the distance time and geography had created between them.
Just before high school graduation, she’d
actually thought—hoped—Ryan might care for her as more than a friend. But he never said anything. And she chalked it up to wishful thinking. The road not taken. At this point, a road she couldn’t afford to take.
She steeled herself against the ache Ryan’s rejection evoked. “Mateo’s people call it the Día de Los Reyes.”
“Reyes. ‘Kings’ in Spanish.” Evy’s blond ponytail swished. “The Magi. Three Kings’ Day.”
“A day of gifts.” Anna locked eyes with her scowling brother. “And this child is his last, best gift to me.”
His elbows on his knees, Charlie steepled his hands under his chin. “With the rest of the Pruitts scattered far and wide this Christmas, there’s plenty of room for you at the house.”
She looked at her brother with his Clark Kent good looks. “I appreciate the offer, but I rented a house on Quayside Lane before I left Texas.”
His brow furrowed. “This is your home, Anna.”
With her older brothers, Jaxon and Ben, on active military duty and firefighter Will on the mainland, it had fallen to Charlie to keep the home fires burning. A home where she’d spent a happy childhood.
Charlie frowned. “You don’t have to do everything by yourself, Anna.”
Evy slid onto the sofa beside Anna. “We want to be here for you.”
Anna’s gaze darted between them. “I love you both for your support, but it’s better this way.”
“Quayside is so remote.” He lifted his chin, the cleft clearly visible. “It’s not good for you to be out there alone. Especially with winter upon us.”
“I’m the big sister, remember, Charlie? I’ll be fine.”
Anna glanced out the picture window at the maples lining the street. Having dropped the last of their leaves, the bare branches revealed the stark beauty of winter. Christmas used to be her favorite time of year.
She hardly remembered the girl she’d once been. Full of optimism as she headed off to college. Surprised by love’s possibilities after meeting handsome Marine Corps PFC Reyes. And because of Mateo’s deployment, a whirlwind wedding. The girl she’d been before death and fear took their toll.
“Why did you do this, Anna?” Her brother’s pensive tone pulled her away from her memories. “Why not start a new family with someone else?”
She stiffened. “I want Mateo’s child.”
“His child keeps you mired in the past.” Charlie’s lips tightened. “You lost your teaching job over this, didn’t you?”
She knotted her hands in her lap. “There were side effects with the fertility drugs. I was absent a lot.” It was the understatement of the century. “The school district chose not to renew my contract. But I have to do this. This child is Mateo’s legacy preserved forever.”
“Do you hear yourself, Anna?” His eyes widened. “What kind of burden is that for a kid to bear? Being someone’s memorial candle. How dare Mateo Reyes ask you to do this.”
She stood so fast she swayed. “That’s not how it was. I want to do this. I need to do this.” She squared her shoulders. “I didn’t go into this lightly.”
“Help us to understand.” Evy caught Anna’s arm. “Please sit down.”
She allowed Evy to pull her onto the sofa again. “Neither Mateo or I ever believed he wouldn’t win the war against the cancer. He was so young. So strong. So full of life...” Her voice broke. “Don’t you think I’ve considered what it will mean to bring a fatherless child into the world?”
Charlie came out of his chair and crouched in front of her. “Raising a child as a single mother is going to be so hard, sis.” He reached for her hand.
“This was Mateo’s greatest desire—to have a child.”
Her brother’s hazel eyes bored into hers. “There was a court case a few years ago, which made national headlines. Posthumous children aren’t entitled to Social Security or military benefits. They have few legal rights.” He blew out a breath.
Charlie didn’t know the half of it. The procedure hadn’t been covered by the VA. She didn’t want her family to know how she’d depleted her savings.
“At first, I tried artificial insemination. But after three failed attempts—”
“You weren’t pregnant at our wedding a year ago.” Evy put her hand to her throat. “How long have you been trying to conceive, Anna?”
A question she preferred not to answer. “The good news is that the in vitro finally worked.” After two failed procedures.
She’d sold anything she could live without. Everything she owned in the world sat in her VW Beetle parked in front of the house.
Charlie rocked on his heels. “Stay here, Anna. With people who love you.”
She shook her head. “I need to do this on my own.”
Evy’s expressive blue eyes clouded. “Need or want?”
Anna chewed her bottom lip. “When Mrs. Savage forwarded the notice of the interim position so close to Christmas, I thought...”
Thanks to pregnancy hormones, she’d been weepy the day the email arrived. She’d given in to the growing desire to come home. To spend Christmas with those near and dear to her heart. But above all, to make a new life for her child.
And the kindergarten opening offered a small financial cushion to take the edge off her empty bank account. As she was learning, babies were expensive.
Charlie glanced at the mantel clock. “It’s the middle of the night in Europe, but we can call Mom and Dad first thing—”
“I’m not ready to tell them yet.” She fisted the hem of her vest.
“They deserve to know the truth.”
“Please, Charlie. A few more weeks.” She opened her palms on her lap. “Let me be the one to tell them.”
Single parenting would be the ultimate and final letdown of everything they once hoped and dreamed for her.
He sighed. “But in the meantime, what will you say to people in town?”
In Kiptohanock, everybody was always up in everybody else’s business.
She sniffed. “Why should I have to say anything?”
He frowned. “Their accent may be slow, but their minds aren’t. People in Kiptohanock can count. They know your husband’s been dead for three years. You don’t want people thinking the worst.”
“The worst?” She gestured at her belly. “You think this is the worst? Let me tell you about worst, little brother.”
“I’m thinking of your reputation, Anna.”
“By the time I was twenty-eight, I’d already suffered the worst day of my life. Holding the hand of my husband as he breathed his last breath.” Her lips twisted. “People need to mind their own business.”
“It’s not that simple, Anna.” He flexed his jaw. “And you know it.”
Evy touched Anna’s hand. “I don’t think you’re giving people enough credit. They will want to help.”
Like Ryan? Except for God, she’d felt alone for a long time. She wouldn’t have survived without His help. She believed in the deepest part of her being this baby was part of God’s plan for her.
“I have to do this, Charlie,” she whispered.
Her brother rose with a groan. “I guess I have no choice but to let you do this your way.”
Evy helped her off the couch. “Don’t forget how much we love you and want to be here for you, Anna.”
She hugged the petite woman who’d become the closest thing to a sister she’d ever known. Saying a quick goodbye before her resolve weakened, Anna lumbered out the door. And nearly fell off the wide-planked porch in disbelief.
Ankles crossed and arms folded, Ryan leaned against her car.
She had a hard time regaining her breath and not only because she walked the distance between the living room and veranda. “What’re you doing here?”
“You caught me by surprise before.” Behind the
frames, his eyes flickered. “I wanted to apologize for walking away. Congratulations, Anna. You’ll be a wonderful mother.”
Sudden warmth flooded her chest. He had no idea how much his words meant.
“You asked me to trust you, Anna. So I do.” He ran his hand over his hair. “I don’t understand this situation at all, but I promise to never stop being your friend.”
Her throat constricted.
Pushing off from the car, he came forward to the bottom step. “Will you forgive me for being an idiot and give me another chance to be the friend you deserve?”
“I’d like that, Ryan.” Tears stung her eyes. “Very much.”
He gave her that crooked smile she remembered so well. Like a flash of lightning, momentarily sizzling her brain.
“I figured Charlie might need help unpacking your car.” He motioned to the packed-to-the-roof baby blue Beetle. “Looks like the day you headed off to college. Remember?”
She remembered.
A tender moment on a long-ago August morning when he helped pack her stuff into this same car. When she’d hoped for something more than friendship. But now? If he only understood how little of that girl remained.
“I’ve rented a small house on Quayside Lane.”
He shrugged. “Then I’ll follow and help you unpack.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“Or I won’t believe you’ve really forgiven me.” He cocked his head. “You don’t want me lying awake all night on your conscience, do you, Anna Banana?”
Her lips quirked.
No fair playing on his affectionate childhood nickname for her. Maybe this once, it wouldn’t hurt to let someone help carry the load. She glanced at the overloaded vehicle. Literally.
“If you want to.”
He laughed. “Perhaps the most begrudging acceptance I’ve ever heard.”
It wouldn’t do to become too dependent on anyone. Not even her dearest friend. “What I meant to say was thank you, Ryan. I’d appreciate your help.”
To show him her sincerity, she gave him a wide smile. But when she took hold of his hand to descend the steps, an unexpected tingle shot from his fingers to her elbow.
