by J. L. Perry
“I don’t have any luggage.”
“You don’t?”
“What can I say? I travel light.”
She’s trying to play down the situation, but it only makes my speculation grow. My mother and I only had the clothes on our back the day we arrived in this town.
I open the back door for her, closing it once she’s seated inside. For some reason, I get a great sense of satisfaction knowing she trusts me enough to get in the car. Under the circumstances, this must be huge for her.
After putting the car into drive, I take a peek at her in the rear-view mirror, watching her as she stares out the side window. I’d love to know what’s going through her head right now, but I can only imagine. Thoughts of that fateful day when we escaped the violent clutches of my stepfather enter my mind. It’s something I haven’t thought about in years, but today has brought it all back to the surface.
How am I going to afford all this? Four new tyres, a new brake light, labour, the tow, a night in the B&B. Jesus. I have a little bit of money stashed away in the bank, but not much. How will I survive with no job and no place to live? Wade hasn’t worked in months. He’s lived at my place rent free, mooching all my food and contributing nothing towards the utility bills. I never even agreed for him to move in, he just did. He spent the night a few weeks after we started dating and never left.
My mind is racing, which does nothing for my already pounding head. I’m so consumed with worry that I don’t even realise Officer McGorgeous has pulled over in front of a beautiful old white building. He never gave me his real name, and I’m not about to ask. It’s like the nickname given to Patrick Dempsey’s character on Grey’s Anatomy—Doctor McDreamy—except hotter. And instead of scrubs, he’s in a police uniform, which only seems to heighten his attractiveness. Who doesn’t love a man in uniform?
“Would you like me to come inside with you?” he asks, eyeing me through the rear-view mirror. He has kind eyes, but I still don’t trust him. I only got in the car because he’s an officer of the law, and persistent. I honestly don’t think he would’ve taken no for an answer.
“No, I’m fine. I can go in on my own.”
“Okay, suit yourself.” He gets out of the car and opens the back door for me. At least he’s a gentleman; I’ll give him that. Wade never once opened the door for me.
After getting out of the car, I come to a stop in front of him, shoving my hands into the pocket of my black slacks because I suddenly feel a bit anxious.
“Thanks … for the lift, I mean, not for defecting my car.” I see him fighting a smile as I turn and walk towards the B&B. He can deny it all he wants, but I’m pretty sure he got pleasure out of doing that. Arsehole.
“I’ll swing around in the morning and take you to the mechanic if you like,” he calls out to my retreating back.
Without turning around, I reply, “Sure, that’ll be great.” I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a small part of me happy I’d be seeing him again, and I hate that. Just think of all the cats you’re going to buy when you get out of this godforsaken town, Morgan. You don’t need a man. I survived okay until Wade came into my life. Sure, I was lonely; my mother passed away when I was young, and my father remarried not long after. He had another family with his new wife, which never really included me. I always felt like an outsider, like I never belonged. Hence why I moved out of home as soon as I was old enough. In a strange way, a part of me had hoped Wade would fill that void, but that wasn’t meant to be. He only managed to make me feel more isolated and unworthy of love. Maybe my future hoard of cats will give me what I’ve been missing.
I move at a slow pace as I unhinge the front gate and walk up the path. I’m hoping Officer McGorgeous drives away quickly, but he seems to be taking his sweet time. I can’t stay here tonight—I can’t afford to. If I’m going to make a go of this new life I’ve been forced to make, I’m going to need cash.
I hover at the front door briefly, and although my back is towards him, I swear I can feel his eyes boring into me. I exhale a frustrated breath as I reach for the door handle. I guess I’m going in whether I want to or not. Grrr.
My eyes are everywhere as I step into the grand foyer of the B&B. This place is easily a hundred years old, maybe more, but you’d never guess it. It’s either been recently restored to its former glory, or very well maintained over the years. The style reminds me of a stately old manor, although slightly less grand.
I’m relieved that nobody seems to be around. Maybe I can just hang in here for a few minutes before making my way back to my car.
I catch a glimpse of myself in the large antique mirror that sits behind the front desk. I’m a mess. Humiliation floods me for the second time today. I quickly rummage through my backpack to retrieve my sunglasses. I pray this is the last time I’ll ever have to see myself like this.
Looking down at my watch, I see it’s just after five. I’m praying Wade thinks I went to work, but I’m terrified that he already knows I’ve fled. I called my boss earlier this morning, saying I had a family emergency to attend to and wouldn’t be at work today. She didn’t question me. I’ve always been a loyal and hardworking employee. I won’t be at work tomorrow either, but I’ll deal with that later.
Wade’s level of rage was at its peak this morning. I can’t for the life of me figure out why it escalated so quickly this time. He’s roughed me up on a number of occasions over the past months, but never to this extent. ‘If I find out you’ve been seeing people behind my back, I’ll fucking kill you.’ He screamed those words in my face as his hands wrapped around my throat, trying to squeeze the life out of me. That’s when I kneed him in the balls, and ran for my life. It’s the one and only time I’ve defended myself against him, but my fight or flight kicked in—I didn’t have a choice. He was probably just as shocked as I was, I’m sure, but I didn’t stick around to find out.
“Oh, I didn’t hear you come in,” a sweet voice says, bringing me back to reality. “Can I help you with something? Are you after a room?”
I focus my attention on the attractive middle aged woman before replying. Shit. I was hoping to get out of here unnoticed. “Umm … I was just wondering what your room rates are?”
“Sure, sweetheart,” she says. “Weekdays are eighty dollars per night, and one hundred on the weekends. That includes a hot dinner and breakfast. If you stay more than three nights, the rates are discounted slightly.” She gives me a kind smile, and I’ve already decided I like her, and although I’d kill for a warm shower and a hot meal, I can’t afford to throw that kind of money away. Who knows when I’ll be able to find a new job.
“I was just enquiring about prices, but thank you.”
“My pleasure. Take a card if you like. It has all our details on it.” I smile when she hands me the business card, and I turn to leave. “Are you new in town? I haven’t seen you around.”
“I’m not from around here, I’m just passing through.”
“Well, enjoy your time in Paterson. It’s a beautiful place, and the people are very friendly.”
Everyone I’ve met so far seems nice. I hate to say it, but even Officer McGorgeous was friendly enough when he wasn’t being an arsehole and slapping a defect on my car, that is.
“Thank you, I will.”
I take in the beautiful country garden on either side of the path as I exit the building and walk towards the street. Thankfully, the thorn in my side has left.
I stand on the footpath lined with beautiful large jacaranda trees. It’s October, so they’re in full bloom, displaying a sea of purple flowers on the trees and the surrounding ground. It is a magical sight, and not like anything I experienced in the concrete jungle I’ve been living in. When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of living in the countryside, owning a horse, and being surrounded by rolling green hills—a place a lot like this. It’s funny that only now, as I stand here taking in my surroundings, I realise just how beautiful and tranquil this place is.
A part o
f me wants to walk around and explore the town, but I have more pressing matters at hand, like getting out of here. Turning, I walk in the opposite direction towards where I left my car.
“What the hell!” I screech, after being jolted from my sleep. The car jerks again before the back end starts to lift in the air, tilting my body so far forward my head almost smashes into the steering wheel. Jesus Christ. Wade. He’s found me. My hand fumbles for the door handle in the darkness, while my heart thunders in my chest.
I’m in a sleep-induced haze as I scramble out of the car. I have no idea what’s going on, but under the circumstances I don’t want to find out, so my first instinct is to run. This time I don’t even bother grabbing my bag as I take off into the darkness as fast as my legs will carry me.
I don’t make it very far before two strong arms wrap around my waist, and I’m tackled to the ground. Lucky for me, we land in the long grass on the side of the road and not the gravelly asphalt, but the weight of his body still manages to knock the wind out of me.
“Get off me!” I scream, jerking my body around, trying to free myself. “I’m not coming home, Wade. Ever! You’ve hurt me for the last time.”
“Shit, Morgan. Is that you?”
I recognise the voice immediately: Officer McGorgeous. I’m immediately flooded with relief that Wade hasn’t found me, but the relief is quickly replaced with confusion and anger. What is it with this guy? Before I get a chance to speak, he stands and effortlessly pulls me to my feet.
“Are you okay? Fuck. I thought it was … I didn’t know it was you. I’m sorry.” He’s rambling. “What are you doing here? I thought you were spending the night in town. Christ, did I hurt you?” I guess he’s just as shocked as I am.
“I, umm … I thought you were someone else too,” I say, trying to swallow the lump in my throat. I’m glad it’s dark so he can’t see the tears brimming in my eyes.
“You thought I was Wade? Is that who you’re running from?”
I hate talking about my situation, hence why I never have. His constant prying is starting to get on my nerves. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to admit that I’ve allowed another human being to treat me so poorly. It’s humiliating.
“None of your business,” I snap, jerking my arm from his grip.
“I’m sorry,” he replies, taking a step back and giving me some space. “I don’t mean to pry; I’m just concerned for you. I can help you if you’d only let me.”
I bow my head before speaking. I’m being a bitch, and he doesn’t deserve that. “I’m sorry too.”
He takes a step forward, invading my space once more, but I’m okay with that. I find I like having him near me. And he smells so good. Gah! Don’t forget your future cats, Morgan.
He gently places his hands on my upper arms, and even though it’s dark, he crouches his body down to make eye contact with me. “Let me help you, Morgan.” His words come out like a plea, and I love the way my name sounds as it falls from his lips. Everything in me wants to accept his offer, but this is my problem. I refuse to get anyone else involved.
He waits for my reply, but when one doesn’t come, he drops his arms and retreats back a few steps.
My heart starts to race again when someone approaches, shining the bright light of a torch in my face. “Everything okay, Ryan?” the older voice says. I squint, raising my hand to shield my eyes.
“Everything’s fine, Bob,” Officer McGorgeous replies, pushing the old guy’s hand down, deflecting the glare of the torch away from me. “Morgan owns the car you’re towing.”
“Oh,” he says. “The way you took off after her made me think we had a live one.”
“She wasn’t supposed to be here. I thought she was staying in town. I ….” His words drift off as his hands run through his short dark hair. I think we’re both a little embarrassed by what just transpired.
“I’ll get back to it then,” Bob says, turning and heading back towards his tow truck.
Ryan focuses his attention back on me. “I was getting your car towed to the mechanic.”
“I can see that now,” I say, dropping my gaze to the ground.
“Are you sure you’re okay? I tackled you pretty hard.”
“A little winded, but fine. I’ve been roughed up worse than ….” I don’t bother finishing my sentence. I’ve already said way more than I’m comfortable with. He lets out a deflated sigh, like he’s disappointed I stopped talking, but I’m grateful he doesn’t pry any further.
“Come, let me take you back to the B&B. You’ll be safe there tonight. You can speak with Joe, the mechanic, in the morning.”
“Okay,” I say, as the corners of my lips turn up slightly. He’s kinda sweet for an arsehole.
“Thanks, Bob,” I call out, raising my hand to him. “Just drop the car at Joe’s workshop. I’m going to take Morgan back to town.”
“No problem. If you hang around for five, I’ll give you guys a lift.”
I turn my attention to Morgan. “Are you okay if we walk? It’s not far, and it’s a lovely night.”
“I’m fine with that,” she replies, and if I’m not mistaken, I’m pretty sure the beginnings of a smile just formed on her pretty face.
No words are spoken as we walk the first fifty metres or so, but it’s a comfortable silence. I have an overwhelming urge to reach for her hand, but of course I don’t. It’s been a long time since anyone has affected me like this. I haven’t been in a serious relationship since I joined the force nine years ago. With the crazy long hours I work, and the limited pickings in this small town, it makes dating difficult.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m far from a saint. A man has needs, but I’m not a fan of casual relationships; I’m an all-or-nothing kind of guy.
“I can’t believe how many stars are in the sky tonight,” she says, breaking the silence.
“I bet you don’t see this many in the city.”
“Hardly any. Why is that?”
“The light pollution. You don’t get that here.”
“I see,” is all she says.
“Look, a falling star.”
“Wow, I saw that too. Oh, there’s another one.” She lets out a contented sigh, which makes me smile.
“We need to make a wish,” I tell her.
She stops, closing her eyes briefly, and my smile grows. I don’t need to think too hard about my wish because I already know what I want: her to stay. I barely even know her, but I’d love to get the chance to. I also want her to experience the kind of happiness I’ve had since moving here. I get the feeling she hasn’t had much of that lately.
“Morgan?”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you stay at the B&B?”
She shrugs. “It was cheaper to stay in my car.”
“You don’t have any money?”
She lets out a long, drawn-out breath before looking down at her feet. “I have a little, but since somebody is making me spend all that money on getting my car fixed, it’s dwindling fast.”
“I feel bad for defecting your car, but your tyres are pretty bald.”
“It’s fine. I’ll need new tyres to get where I’m going anyway.”
“And where’s that?”
Her eyes move back to meet mine before she replies. “I don’t know … Tasmania?”
“What you’re running from must be pretty bad if you want to go all the way to the ends of the earth.”
“You could say that.” She starts walking again, and I know she’s said more than she’s probably comfortable with, so I don’t push her any further. “Have you lived here all your life?”
She’s trying to deflect the conversation away from herself, but I’m okay with that.
“No, not all my life,” I say. “I’ve been living here for almost twenty years. We moved here when I was eight. It’s such a great place to live. Best decision my mum ever made.”
I want to open up to her about my own past, but I don’t. Although our history is common knowledge a
round these parts, it’s not something I ever felt comfortable talking about. Besides, she has her own demons to deal with, so it would be selfish of me to burden her with mine.
“Does your mum still live in the area.”
“Yes,” is all I say.
“No siblings?”
“Nope, just the two of us. What about you? Have you always lived in Queensland?”
“Yes. The first sixteen years of my life were spent in Townsville. I moved to the Gold Coast just before my seventeenth birthday.”
“That would explain your sun-kissed skin.”
She lets out a sweet giggle before she replies. It’s like music to my ears. “You know what they say about Queensland weather—beautiful one day, perfect the next.”
“It’s a beautiful place,” I say in agreement. “I spent a few weeks on the Gold Coast after I graduated from school.”
“You went up for schoolies?”
“Yes,” I say with a chuckle. “What an eye opener that was, me being an innocent country boy and all.”
“Right,” she says, with a laugh. “I’ve seen first-hand how wild those schoolies parties can get—lots of sex, drugs and alcohol. That’s a teenage boy’s dream, isn’t it?”
She’s got me there, so I don’t bother replying. Well, the sex and alcohol part are true; I’ve never taken drugs.
“So what about you? Do you have any brothers or sisters?”
“Yes, two younger sisters … well, half-sisters—same father, different mother. My dad remarried after my mum passed.”
“I’m sorry about your mum.” I like that she’s opening up a bit. It’s nice to get to know more about her.
She shrugs. “I was only four when she passed. I don’t remember much about her.”
“My dad passed away when I was young too, so I understand.”
“I’m sorry,” she says, giving me a sympathetic smile.
“It is part of life, I guess, but I often wonder what life would be like if he were still alive. Things changed so much after he was gone.”
“Yeah, I wonder that too.”
