by M. A. Roth
“In all the worlds,” I add for good measure, so she’ll understand. This gets me a laugh.
“I love you.”
I pulled her to me, feeling so proud at how she is handling everything. “I love you so much too, sister,” I say as I look at her. She has grown up, not just in appearance; she has seen far too much of the world at such a young age. I only hoped she would witness no more of the cruelty.
I stay only a while longer, but know I have to return back to Avitus’. Jessica gives a huge yawn and I take that as my queue to leave. “I’ll see you soon,” I promise. I hug her tightly before making my way back to Avitus’.
I arrive at Avitus’ in the early hours of the afternoon. Alana is waiting for me. This is becoming the number one destination in Humus. Oh God, this I don’t need. Her armor is on her as if she is ready to go into battle. Maybe she is… with me.
Before I reach her, she starts. “How could you?”
I raise my hands. “I’m sorry, Alana, but not right now.”
Her foot taps impatiently on the ground. “Shall I make an appointment with her royal highness?” Her tone is laced with sarcasm.
I roll my eyes. “You’re hilarious, Alana, but I didn’t mean it.”
Her face tightens with outrage. “Have you had any idea how it felt to have no control over your own body, as someone
else invades it?”
I cringe inwardly at her question. “I really am sorry. It will never happen again.” I give her a pleading look. I really don’t want to fight with her again.
Her anger subsides slightly. She fiddles with her sword belt on her trousers. “How did you do it?” she asks, trying to hide how intrigued she is.
A smile starts to grow on my face. But a look from her makes it disappear just as quickly. “Come on inside.”
Avitus sits at the table waiting on me. “Sarajane, don’t ever leave this house again without informing me,” he says, just as Alana walks in behind me.
“I was with Alana and I didn’t want to wake you.”
“Yes, she was,” Alana says to Avitus’ curious look.
But he nods. “Okay. I will be in my room if you need me.” He leaves.
I call after him, “Thanks,” feeling bad at pushing him out of his own home.
When he is gone, I turn back to Alana. “I am so sorry, just didn’t want him worrying.”
Alana sits down. “So where were you really?” she asks with a raised eyebrow.
I plunked down, feeling really tired again. “I was with Jessica.”
“How is she holding up?” Alana asks sympathetically.
I rub my face. “Good. She is so brave. I am so proud of her.” I place the tin I have under my arm on the table. Alana raises an eyebrow for an explanation. “From Home. I don’t want to talk about it,” I say, so I decide to change the subject. “So you want to know how I did it?”
She gives me a look that says the change in topic doesn’t go unnoticed; nothing does with Alana. “Go on then, tell me.”
So I do.
Alana sits patiently as I tell her all. When I finish, she sits back. “That is one amazing gift to have.” I nod in agreement. “But don’t ever use it on me again,” she says pointing her finger at me.
“I won’t promise,” I give her a small smile. That cracks her up.
Avitus returns then. “Are the girls finished talking? Sarajane has a lot of training to get through.”
Alana rises. “Yes, Sir. And thank you for letting me have a word with Sarajane.”
Avitus smiles kindly at Alana, but I only received an exhausted look from him. “Get changed, Sarajane; your night clothes will not be sufficient for your training today.”
I try to smile my way out of it, but Avitus just shakes his head. I change my clothes quickly.
We make our way further outside the city where Avitus leads me to an empty field. The grass is dead, brown and yellow blades crunch under our feet. When we reach the center, Avitus sits down cross-legged and I join him.
“Can you feel it?” Avitus asks with a look of contentment on his face.
The only thing I feel is the brittle grass under my backside. “Feel what, exactly?” I ask.
Avitus glares at me and lets out a sigh of resignation. “My affinity is with the earth. So I feel her all around us now. So will you just follow my instructions?”
I do as Avitus says, hoping to hurry up the process. I close my eyes and feel the grass beneath me, the clay stones and further down.
“Do you sense her?” Avitus asks.
I don’t and I say so.
Avitus rises and brushes blades of grass of his pants and starts to walk away.
“Where are you going?” I ask, getting up to follow him. But he doesn’t stop.
“When you want to take this seriously, come find me. Until then, I will not waste my time on you. Sneaking off at all hours of the night will not save Saskia.”
And that is it. Take this seriously; the cheek of him. My face burns with frustration. What did he expect me to do? Train, sleep eat and train some more.
I sit there, trying to focus, but nothing happens. How was I going to defeat Lucian if I wasn’t trained? If Avitus didn’t care, why should I? I pick at the long blades, letting them crumble in my hand. I was running out of time.
The longer I was here, the longer Lucian had to destroy this world and maybe my own.
I closed my eyes and take a deep breath. Mother Earth, come to me. Help me to understand.
There is a shift in the air around me; the grass brushes itself against my palms, thighs, and feet, anywhere that is in contact with it. Did she hear me? Is this a sign? I take it as one. Let me feel what I cannot see, I ask while closing my eyes. I had once heard that a blind man will see far more than someone with full sight, and at that moment when Mother Earth comes to me, I can understand this phrase. It is everything I would have missed with my eyes; it is a feeling deep inside me. My ears pick up sounds that I would never have heard. I can hear the grass grow; insects move their tiny bodies through the clay and rocks without being crushed; the roots of the trees push out, removing anything in their path. A rabbit hides in its burrow, aware of my presence. I can sense men’s footprints that once upon a time had walked upon the soil, but were now long gone. It told a story of the past, and yet one of the future of what would happen, if I placed my hands deep into the soil, letting Mother Earth feel me, as she lets me feel her. And that’s what I do.
A cry leaves my mouth. When I open my eyes, the yellow field is now alive with long green blades of grass and daisies have popped up everywhere. The grass reaches to my shoulders, hiding me from the world. I laugh and sink back into the thick and lush grass. I look up at Avitus standing over me. “Now you feel her,” he says with a smile.
I don’t move, but touch his boot with my palm. “Thank you. This is amazing.”
Avitus joins me as we follow insects and creatures throughout the soil. We lose ourselves in this paradise. But darkness makes us come out of our trance reluctantly.
We return to Avitus’ house, both of us quiet and drained, from what felt like the sensation of leaving our bodies, and joining a force so great and amazing that my soul lifts at what just happened. I go to bed content, yet exhausted; so does Avitus.
The next few days we train more and more, and I start to feel alive. I don’t leave Avitus’ side and no-one comes to seek me out. It is just me, Avitus, and a lot of magic. I go to bed every night content and my strength gathers at each passing day.
Avitus informs me that soon my training in fighting will start.
I groan. “I hate it,” I say, and plunk my head down on my arm. “Who is going to train me?” I feel a sense of panic rising. I am happy away from everyone; I love the space. Sure, I miss them, but the world right now seems to be angry at me, so why entice them?
“You will be trained by the best,” Avitus says.
My whole body tightens. “Tristan, I can assume.”
A s
ympathetic smile from Avitus confirms it.
“Great. Just great.” I know he will hate this as much as me. I want to see him so badly… and to kiss him, but I know he will hurt me again with his words.
I return to my room and try to sleep, but it doesn’t come easy.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
SARAJANE
I wake up to debris and dust coating the room. “What the hell?” I jump up off the bed. My foot hits a large piece of debris that falls from the ceiling. The world shakes viciously, sending me sailing into the far wall. Bile rises in my throat as blood trickles down my face from a cut on my head. I stand on shaky legs as the floor starts to give way under me. I need to get out of here, and quick.
The floor creaks loudly as floor boards spring upwards, cracking in the center. Then the floor beneath my feet disappears and I tumble into darkness.
A light burns before me, coldness wrecks my body.
“Sarajane!” A male voice keeps me awake. Strong arms are around me. I try to open my eyes but a pain erupts in my head that makes me stop.
“Sarajane?”
The voice is familiar, but I can’t respond.
Exhaustion pulls heavily at my mind, but the voice keeps pulling me back, saying my name gently. The heat from the man’s chest against my face and the lull of his movements makes me want to sleep.
“Sarajane!” The voice is rougher. We are still moving and I recognize the voice. It’s Carew. I want to tell him to be quiet. He is like a fly buzzing in my ear.
“Hmm,” is all I can muster up.
“Don’t sleep. We are nearly there.”
Alarm bells sound in my head. There? Where is he taking me? But the warmth and heaviness that coats me keeps me quiet, so instead I smile like a lazy cat and his voice grows further away.
I open my eyes, the pain in my head makes me close them again. There is no light wherever I am. Only darkness that greets me. I close my eyes again, as it feels like the most natural reaction. I move my body slightly. I am sitting on a cold stone that is damp or maybe really cold. A shiver erupts through me, sending goosebumps to pop up all over my bare arms and legs.
It all comes rushing back. The earthquake, falling through the floor. I reach up and touch my head, my hand comes away slick with blood. Then the memory of Carew saving me makes me go still.
“Carew?” I whisper.
“Yes.”
His voice is right beside me, making me jump a little as my heart flutters in my chest. “Jesus Christ, don’t sneak up on me!” I say as I try to calm my pounding heart.
“I have been here the whole time,” Carew’s voice is low and I try to turn to see him, but it’s so dark.
“What the hell happened? And where are we?” I ask, while keeping my eyes closed, it lessens the pain in my head.
“I think the city is under attack, so I took you underground. These tunnels lead everywhere, so when you’re able to move, I’ll take you to Mirium’s. He will keep you safe.”
I look in the direction of his voice, but everything is pitch black. So this is how he and Adora got into the city without being noticed.
“How bad is it?” I ask, afraid of the answer. My stomach tightens at the prospect.
“I did as you asked,” Carew says, his words are filled with frustration.
What the hell was he talking about? I reach out and grab his arm, He shrugs me off. “Don’t touch me!” He barks. “Adora will be here soon. So just be quiet until then.”
So he had been talking to Adora. She must be part of the same tribe. “What about Avitus… my mum and sister?”
I ask, starting to panic. No reply. “Carew!” I practically scream with frustration.
“Not my problem,” is his reply.
“And what am I? Why the hell did you save me?” The louder I speak, the more my head starts to pound. I push my palms into my temples, willing the pain to go away. I moan as the pain reaches a new peak.
“Take deep breaths and you will be fine.”
“Drop dead and leave me alone,” I retort, hating him at this moment.
A sarcastic laugh reaches my ears. “You sure are something. But that mouth of yours will get you into trouble.”
I don’t respond, as my mouth fills with saliva and my stomach roils. I lay flat on the cold concrete to try to cool my body down.
A figure carrying a light moves swiftly toward us. I don’t move, as Adora kneels down beside me. “Carew, what happened to her?”
I still can’t see him, as he’s behind me.
“She banged her head.”
Adora gives him a wicked look. “Help me carry her.”
Before Adora can reach me, Carew scoops me up in his arms and he keeps his focus straight ahead. “Where to?” he asks Adora impatiently.
“Come on this way.” Adora juts out her chin in front of her and we follow.
“My family?” I ask and swallow another mouthful of Saliva.
“They are safe, don’t worry,” Adora replies without stopping.
Relief courses through my body. I’m far more aware of every part of Carew. His arm around my waist and the other under my leg. His heart beats wildly in his warm chest. I reach up and wrap my arm around his neck to try to hold myself away from him, my movements cause us to move closer to each other. His dark eyes flicker down at me but he looks away quickly.
We reach a ladder and Carew puts me down like I’m burning him. Adora climbs it and I follow her very aware of Carew’s looming form behind me.
I enter Mirium’s cottage through a hatch door in the floor. The cottage is empty. A fire is smoldering, its attendant long gone. Once I’m seated, Adora hands me a mug of water. Carew hasn’t come up and Adora closes the door in the floor.
“What is with him?” I ask Adora as she peers out the windows.
“We all have our stories, Sarajane, and Carew is no exception.” She turns to me then. “I must go before anyone returns.”
I reach for her hand. “Please don’t leave me.”
She gives me a smile. “It’s fine. Mirium will be here soon. I can feel him.” She pulls the hatch in the floor up and disappears.
I stand up, even against the pounding in my head and fix the rug so it looks like I had used the door, in case anyone other than Mirium arrives. I fall back into the chair and swallow the saliva that has built up again in my mouth.
Mirium doesn’t seem shocked when he arrives back to his cottage to find me curled up in pain in an armchair. He moves past me without a word and starts brewing something that smells rotten. He places the mug under my nose; I cringed back from the smell.
“Drink all of this, you will feel better and it will help your head.”
I don’t ask how he knows my head is throbbing. It’s Mirium; he just knows things. I swallow it while holding my nose. My stomach protests but I manage to hold down the foul liquid.
“How bad is it?” I ask, taking in Mirium’s appearance for the first time.
“Not good.” He sits down. He looks so tired and his clothes are covered in dust. “We lost a lot, but they have managed to extinguish a lot of the fires. I don’t understand why Humus’s own people would turn against each other.”
Mirium rests in an armchair beside the smoldering fire that he prods with the poker. “Some people are saying that it is King Paulus; others swear its traitors. It is hard to know who to believe.” Mirium takes a deep breath. “An army outside is one thing, but people rebelling inside is another.”
Mirium looks at me a sympathetic smile on his face.
“You need rest, not my problems, child.” He stands, using his staff. “How is Carew and Adora?” he asks while throwing another log on the fire.
“You knew they were here?” I don’t know why I am surprised. Mirium always knows everything. “They’re fine. Carew saved me from Avitus’ and they brought me here. Do you think King Paulus is really here? Like is it possible?” I ask. My headache has subsided, but It feels like my head is spinning with all the questio
ns that race through it.
“I don’t know, but Carew swore he saw him too. It is hard to know who is telling the truth.”
A bang sounds at the door and Morrick and Tristan walk in without waiting for a reply. Both of their faces relax when they see me. “You’re okay?” Tristan speaks out, but he doesn’t step any closer to me. He stands obediently beside Morrick.
“Yeah, fine. Thanks.” I turn to Morrick then. He can see the question on my face.
“They are all fine, unharmed,” he says before moving to Mirium. “Who told you of King Paulus?” Morrick asks with a pained expression on his face. Tristan stands where he is, throwing glances my way every few seconds.
“It does not matter who, Morrick. You know this.”
This isn’t the first time this conversation has taken place.
Mirium’s drained voice indicates that.
But Morrick looks anything but ready to stop. “Yes it is. And you know it!”
Mirium hits the wooden floor with his staff. “It will do no good.”
My stomach tightens. What would happen if they knew Carew was here? They believed he was on King Paulus’s side. I remember the conversation they had with Musa when we were in Aquaterra.
Morrick kneels down in front of Mirium. “Please…” he is about to say more, but pauses. “It is important to me.”
Mirium’s face softens and he touches Morrick’s head like he is a boy. It’s a very affectionate picture. “I know it is, and I know how personal this is to you to capture King Paulus. I understand the suffering he brought upon your people. Marta in particular, but I cannot tell you. Too many have died today.”
Morrick rises abruptly, angry. Mirium looks sadly at Morrick.
“How did you end up here?” Morrick practically snarls at me.
“I walked here,” I say off-handedly.
Morrick’s eyes narrow. “One day your lies will catch up with you.”
“Don’t dare gave me a lecture on morals, Morrick. Like you are one to talk!” I fire back, sick of his moods.
Why everyone can’t just leave me alone, let me train, let me save Saskia and be done with it.
