by Savannah May
I turn around and run right into Reese. He immediately wraps his arms around me for a hug and then pulls back. He’s looking at me, his face tense, waiting for answers. I finally manage to speak. “Dad’s in room 307. She can’t give me any information about Carter. “
Reese grabs my hand and barks something at the first person walking by and then pulls me through the lobby to the elevator. By some miracle, we end up outside of room 307. Reese kisses me on the head.
“I’ll be right here, Livy.”
I push on the door and see Dad lying in the bed. He has some stitches across his forehead and his foot is propped up with some sort of orthopedic boot on it. The worst the grey pallor on his face.
“Daddy,” I whisper.
He opens his eyes and smiles at me, holding out his hand. “Hey, pumpkin.”
I put my hand over my mouth and start sobbing. I can’t stop the tears as I rush over to him.
He clasps my hand. “Shhhh…Livy, it’s okay. I’m sorry I scared you.”
I try to brush away the tears but they keep coming. “What happened?”
He shakes his head. “I did something stupid and Carter saved my ass. Look, baby, I need to talk to you about Carter.”
A vile lurch goes through my core and I taste acid. For a second I think I’m going to vomit. Please. No! Don’t let him be…
“Oh, God. Is he?”
“No baby he’s not,” My father says quickly, adding a reassuring squeeze to my hand. “But he wasn’t in great shape. They say he’s having tests right now. We still don’t know anything.”
My father looks deeper into my soul than he ever has before.
“Livy, I need to tell you I’m sorry. It’s obvious you care about him a lot.”
I nod my head. He looks at me with a sad smile. “Do you love him?”
I nod my head again and start sobbing as I desperately try to wipe the tears away.
He gulps down and turns to look at the window. I can tell talking about this is hard for him.
“I thought so,” he gruffs. “The way you’ve been this past month, so withdrawn. It was like seeing myself again, in the weeks and months after your mom passed away. I know we haven’t talked about him and you. I guess we should have.”
I nod again. And take his huge hand in both mine. I still want to cling to the remnants of our previous relationship, where I was little and he was my only protector. It’s hard for both of us to make this leap to the other side.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to you being all grown up. I don’t know if I’ll ever think any man’s good enough for you. But if there’s anyone that comes close, it might be Carter. He’s the best man I know. I also know I need to trust you to make your own decisions. Liv, I’ve been selfish and I’m sorry I haven’t been there for you. I don’t know what’s happening between you two now, but I’m here no matter what. Okay?”
I smile at him. It makes me feel good that we’re sorting things out. Even if I can’t be with Carter, maybe I’ll get Dad back.
“I appreciate you telling me that, daddy,” I say, trying to hold back more tears. “I know it wasn’t easy. But it doesn’t matter now. We’re not together.”
“Hmph,” my father grunts. I can’t tell whether that’s a good hmph or bad. It doesn’t really matter. “It’s not an easy life being with a firefighter.”
I nod. “I think I know that Dad having lived with one my entire life.”
He grins, conceding me that one. “You can’t blame me for wanting to save you this kind of strain.”
“You don’t love someone because they’re safe and secure. Would you have wanted mom to be that way?”
Dad’s features wince, as they always do when I bring up my mom. It was a low blow but I had to make sure he knows I’m not a little girl now. “What if her father had told you no?”
“Believe me he did,” my father says, his eyes glazing over with memory.
“And she did it anyway?”
“You’re a lot like her,” he says, then; “Was that Reese I saw outside the door?” he asks, obviously changing the subject. “Why don’t you two drive over to the Starbucks and get me some decent coffee and then run by the house and pick me up some clean clothes. It looks like I’m staying tonight.”
I nod my head and then stand up to bend over and kiss him on the cheek. “We’ll be back soon. Love you, Dad.”
“Love you too, Pumpkin.”
14
Carter
I hear a beeping noise and I want to open my eyes but they’re so heavy. Everything’s foggy. I wonder where I am. Every time I try to take a breath, it hurts. Then I remember, thanks to the pain every time I inhale. My eyes pop open expecting to see the tree across my chest, but it’s not there. I raise my hand to touch it and realize there’s a tube attached. I must be in the hospital.
With difficulty I turn my head towards the closed door and then turn the other way, working through the sharp pain. That’s when I’m shocked to see John in a chair next to me. His head is back on the headrest and his eyes are closed.
I clear my throat. Damn, I’m thirsty. His eyes pop open and he smiles. It’s so good to see him smile. It seems like a long time since I’ve seen him do it. We’re both still here, ready to fight another day. I grin at him.
“You look like shit,” I croak.
He chuckles. “You think I look like shit? You ought to see yourself right now.”
I laugh and immediately clutch my chest. “Damn, that hurts. What happened? Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Thanks to you. I’ve got a busted ankle and bump on the head. Nothing compared to being crushed by a forty-foot Northern White Pine. How do you feel?”
“Damn. I don’t know, like I was crushed by a forty footer? And thirsty.”
John makes an effort and pulls himself out of the chair to pour me some water. He holds the cup up to my lips and I take a sip. Something flashes through his eyes when he looks at me but I can’t tell what it is. Fuck, I hope nothing went awry.
“Is everyone okay? Did the crew get out okay?”
“Everyone’s good,” he nods. “We had two crews come in for back up and it’s under control now. It should burn out in a couple of hours.”
I grimace when I try to sit up. “How bad is it? What’s wrong with me?” I ask him.
He grins and shakes his head. “I thought for sure you weren’t gonna make it up there. The weight of that tree—you’re lucky it didn’t kill you…but you[‘re such a tough old bastard. Doc says you have some deep bruising and a few cracked ribs. You’re gonna be in pain for a couple of weeks, but you’ll live.”
I nod and turn my head, I can’t look at him. It’s the worst feeling in the world. The weight of the guilt on my shoulders combined with losing Livy is a lot worse than the physical pain I’m in right now.
“John—I’m so damn sorry about everything.”
“Stop there,” He interrupts me. “I’m the one who needs to apologize. When you came to talk to me about Livy, I should have heard you out. I was pissed, I’m not gonna lie. I still see her as my little girl and the age difference does bother me. Mostly, it’s that you kept it from me but if I’m honest, I’m not sure I wouldn’t have reacted any different if you’d come to me sooner.”
I let it all sink in before responding. It’s damn good to be communicating again even if it hurts.
“It’s okay, man. You were right in everything you said. She needs somebody better than me. I don’t deserve her and I hate that I ruined our friendship in the process of figuring that out. And I hate myself for hurting her. I just, damn it, I don’t know…” My voice croaks out and a fucking useless tear threatens at the corner of my eye.
John looks at me with a gaze that strips my skin away. “Do you really love her?”
“Yeah. God help me, but I do, more than anything. I’m sorry, John.”
“Well then, you should tell her.”
I look at him. There’s no way I heard him right. “What are
you saying?”
“I’m saying Carter, life’s too short. You should tell her. And if you’re lucky enough that she takes your old, ugly ass back, I won’t kill you. As long as you never hurt her. Do we have an understanding?”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing but I’ll take it. Fuck yeah, I’ll take it. A massive grin stretches across my lips. “Yeah you got it. Are we good?”
“Yeah. We’re good Carter,” he says, pushing himself out of the chair and balancing on his crutches.
As he makes his way out of the room, I can’t resist and call after him. “John, I want to marry her.”
“I figured you’d say that,” he grumbles.
I chuckle and clutch my chest to ease the pain shooting through it. “I’ll take that as you giving me your blessing.”
He shakes his head and turns back towards me smiling. “Maybe I’ll get lucky and she’ll say no.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” I call out to him and I hear him laughing as he walks out the door.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted. John was joking about Livy taking me back, but I’m worried after what I said to her. I’m worried that she won’t trust me. I’m worried that she won’t forgive me. But at least there’s a chance now and I’m going to do everything in my power to make things right between us again. I hate that I’m stuck in this place. I want to go find Olivia right now and beg her to forgive me.
I contemplate pushing the call button for the nurse. I need my phone. I need to know how soon I can get out of here.
I find the cord beside me and just as I’m about to push the button, I hear a soft knock at the door. Before I can answer, I see the door crack open.
It’s Livy. Her stunning blue eyes are red and so is the tip of her perfect little nose. Her beautiful golden hair is falling around her shoulders and she’s wearing a white lace sundress I’ve never seen before. I swear I don’t know how she manages to look sexy as hell and innocent all the same time. I try to sit up in my bed, but it hurts like hell. I finally find my voice and croak out her lovely name. “Livy?”
She walks tentatively into the room. She looks sad and frightened.
“Carter. I’m sorry,” she says with the softest, sweetest voice I’ve ever heard. “I know you don’t want me here. Dad said you were okay, but I needed…” Her voice drops off and she looks down for a second and then looks back up at me with tears welling in her eyes. “I had to see you. I needed to make sure you were okay.”
She’s standing at the foot of my bed and she keeps backing up. It’s like she can’t get far enough away from me and it breaks my heart. I hold out my hand to her, needing to touch her more than I need to breathe.
“Liv, come over here,” I tell her.
She does as I say and hesitantly walks towards me and puts her hand in mine. Tears are streaming down her face as she looks down at me.
“I’m so sorry, Baby,” I tell her as I stroke my thumb across her palm. “I never wanted to hurt you. I just didn’t want to come between you and your dad.”
She puts her head down and wipes the tears from her cheek with her shoulder. “It’s okay, Carter. I just…are you really okay?”
I manage to scoot over in the bed, biting down so as not to wince with the pain. Then I reach for the control to raise it up so that I’m sitting. “Will you come sit beside me?”
Her eyes are wide with naughty surprise. “I don’t…I can’t Carter.”
“Please Livy, I need you close to me.”
Liv is shaking when she steps out of her shoes and crawls in the bed beside me. She leans her head on my shoulder and I intertwine my fingers with hers, holding on to her hand for dear life. I bury my nose in her beautiful hair and breath in the scent I’ve been craving since the day I left her broken on my front porch. “Look at me, Livy.”
She turns her head and looks up at me. I reach up and brush the tears from her cheek. “I’m so sorry, baby. All those things I said to you, none of it’s true. I love you, Livy, I love you more than breathing. I can’t live without you for another day. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” I search her eyes, on edge with looking for any hint that she’s going to forgive me and then I hear a commotion outside.
Reese busts through the door and Ben follows behind him. As soon as Reese see us in the bed together, a slow wicked grin spreads across his face.
“Oh. My. God. Are you two getting busy in here? I’m pretty sure that’s against hospital regulations. Nurse!” He shouts towards the door with his hands on his hips.
I watch Livy’s beautiful face turn bright red. “Reese! Shut the hell up.”
I can’t help but laugh and have to clutch my chest. “Reese, you’ve got to have pity on me. It hurts like hell to laugh.”
He holds up his hand and looks down at his fingernails like he’s bored.
“Yeah, well, maybe you deserve it.” He glances up at me and a look of understanding passes between us. He knows I hurt her and he wants to make sure I won’t do it again. “Anyway…have you two worked out whatever ridiculousness has been going on between you?”
“I was working on it before we were interrupted,” I say, hoping he’ll take the hint to get out.
Ben comes in behind Reese and places a hand on his shoulder. “We aren’t staying. We just wanted to check in.” Ben’s eyes drift to mine. “I was worried up there. I’m glad to see you’re okay.”
I nod at him. “Thanks, man.”
Reese throws his hands up in the air. “Enough of all this sentimental crap! You two work your shit out,” he says looking back and forth between us. “Double Date. Next weekend.”
I have to hold onto my chest because even happiness hurts as it sets about exploding though my torso. With a sly wink, Reese grabs Ben’s hand and pulls him out of the room.
I turn back to Liv and smile. “Where were we on working our shit out?”
I watch the corners of her perfect lips turn up, but the smile doesn’t reach her eyes. She’s wary. I hate myself for hurting her so badly.
“Carter, I don’t get it,” she says softly. “One night you’re telling me you want me to be yours forever and the next day, you’re saying you ‘don’t do relationships’ and that you’re never getting married again. And what about my dad? And by the way, I never said anything about marriage. Why did you even bring that up? And now you’re saying you love me? I don’t know what to do with all of that.” Her eyebrows furrow in confusion and I don’t blame her.
I’m an ass.
“Baby, I know you’re confused. I’m so sorry. I’ve been all over the place. That morning on the porch, I felt like I had to let you go. I couldn’t bear the thought of coming between you and your dad. I felt guilty about betraying him and lying to him. I said all that to make you walk away. But god help me, Liv, I do love you. I don’t deserve you, but I love you.”
She looks at me with tears in her eyes. “What’s changed Carter? What about my dad? You think he’ll ever change when it comes to his only daughter?”
I smile at her. “He and I have to come to an understanding.” She lifts an eyebrow, her mouth curling into a perfect O. “Basically, he agreed not to kill me unless I hurt you again.”
At last she lets out that lovely laugh and it’s the sweetest sound I’ve ever heard.
“It sounds like you guys have worked everything out.”
I grin. “Yeah. We’re good. But what about you and me?”
She smiles at me. “Carter?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you too.”
“Livy.”
“Yeah?”
“I’m gonna marry you.”
I watch as her face turns bright red. “Maybe we could double date with Ben and Reese first?”
I chuckle. “Yeah. Okay. I won’t rush you. I’ll give you at least another week or two before I ask again.”
She giggles again. She thinks I’m joking. But I’m not. “Carter?”
“Yeah?”
“Kiss me.”
Epilogue
Six months later - Olivia
I moved in with Carter as soon as he came out of the hospital. It wasn’t planned that way, in fact I thought I’d ease into our new life gradually so that my dad could get used to being alone.
That was the biggest hurdle to my happiness - that it had to mean him losing me. And dating Carter, having him come to my dad’s house to pick me up and all that stuff, well it seemed kinda silly.
Carter was kept in for almost two weeks and once home, bed rest was ordered for the compression on his internal organs to have time to heal. Along with my dad, I helped him out of the wheelchair to my Jeep even though he kept trying to refuse assistance, saying he was fine, just out of practice on his feet.
“Someone’s gonna have to stay with you,” my dad said, shaking his head ruefully. “Your sorry ass won’t be able to manage on your own.”
He looked at me with a grin that didn’t reach all the way to his eyes. I knew he was giving me permission to go, making it easier on me. I put my arms around his neck and clung to him longer than I should have until he gently pushed me away.
In the first week at Carter’s place, I played naughty nurse too many times to count. Carter couldn’t keep his hands off me and although I worried about his injuries, he assured me he was strong enough to handle it.
“I need you Liv. Your tight pussy wrapped around me is all the healing I’m ever gonna need.”
He pulled me up on the bed where I threw one leg gingerly over his pelvis and settled onto Carter’s huge hard bulge with trembling legs and arms and everything. I still couldn’t quite take in that the hunk was all mine. With a grin, he slowly peeled away my clothes like he was unwrapping a gift and wondering what he’d find within. Once he had me naked, he gazed at my body, stroking and pinching the sensitive parts until I moaned and pleaded for him to fuck me.
“I’m gonna need you to do the fucking for a couple of days, just until I get back on my feet” he said with a filthy smirk.
