by K. A. Linde
“Same, love,” she said. “Same.” Then, she flicked her dark hair off her shoulder. “Now, you’ll have to excuse me. I have a reception to finish.”
With that, she turned and strode back into her own party. The devil in virginal white.
My hands were shaking, and the last shred of control I had been clinging to in Katherine’s presence was collapsing.
“I can’t believe she did this,” Penn said. “It’s vindictive, even for Katherine.”
“I just…don’t know how she even fucking found out,” I gasped.
“Someone must have told her. I don’t think she would have cared to figure it out on her own.”
Tears welled in my eyes. Ones I’d held back all night. But I didn’t want to shed them. Not here. Not at all.
“God, you were right,” I said. I balled my hands into fists. “This world chewed me up and spit me out. And they just keep fucking winning. Even when they’re wrong, they always win.”
Penn sighed. “I did want you to get out. They’ve been playing the game a lot longer. The board wasn’t even.”
I brushed at the tears, determined not to let them fall. I wouldn’t allow it. Katherine would never get my tears.
“I need…I need to get out of here.”
“Of course,” he said. “I can take you home.”
“I bet this will all blow over,” Jane said softly.
I looked over at her. “I find that doubtful.”
“I believe it. Get away for Christmas, and when you come back for my New Year’s Eve party, it’ll be like nothing ever happened.”
“My pen name was revealed. Katherine humiliated me in front of the entire world. I don’t think a week is going to change anyone’s mind.”
Jane frowned. “I’m so sorry, Natalie. I hate that this happened to you. Let me know if I can do anything. Anything at all. My connections are at your disposal.”
“Thanks,” I muttered and then continued toward the exit. I was almost out into the freak blizzard when I realized, “Fuck, I don’t have my coat.”
“Do you want me to go back in and get it?”
I shook my head. I couldn’t bear the thought of it. “I have another at home. I’ll just…consider it another casualty to the evening.”
Penn slid his jacket off and wrapped it around my shoulders. We were silent as we took a cab back to my apartment. He’d never been inside my apartment. Never even been to the building. And I found that I didn’t want his first time to be seeing me pack and break down.
I turned my back to the door when we got upstairs. “This is me.”
“Can I come in?”
I debated on whether or not I was making the right move and then shook my head.
“No?”
“Not right now,” I amended.
“Natalie, let me take care of you.”
“I think…I need to take care of myself in this one.”
“You don’t have to do this alone,” he told me.
“I know. But I’m going to go inside and pack and leave the city. And I don’t want that to be the first time you come inside.” I shed his jacket and passed it back to him to prove my point.
“You’re just going to leave?”
“I’m a mess. I need to go home and regroup. Think this all through. Process. I don’t even know what my agent is going to say. What my editor is going to say. I was already going home for Christmas. I’m going to buy a ticket for tonight and get there early.”
Penn slipped his hands into his pockets. “I hate to bring one more thing into your headspace right now, Nat, but…where does this leave us?”
“I don’t know,” I whispered honestly. “I don’t know anything right now.”
“Let me rephrase that,” he said. He brought his hands up to my jaw and stared deep into my blue eyes. “This is what I want, Natalie. You. Just you. All of you. You exactly as you are.”
“Penn,” I whispered, “I don’t know if I’m ready.”
He pressed a kiss to my lips and then stepped back. “That’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here when you are.”
Then, I watched him walk away with all the promise of a better tomorrow for us. And I stepped inside to face the bitter reality of today.
Epilogue
Natalie — Six Days Later
Amy held her hand out for the tub of icing. “I want the chocolate.”
I handed it to her and scooped up the half-finished container of rainbow chip. “This is the best therapy.”
“My mom sure does know best in this regard.”
“She sure does.”
Another tub of icing. Another broken dream. Another shattered reality.
I’d flown home on the first flight out of New York City. Amy had met me at the airport, and I’d confessed everything that had happened in minute detail on the car ride home. We were still eating icing over it six days later.
“I still can’t believe that bitch had someone write that article on you.”
Amy had read them all. All the outlets that were reporting on it. And then the comments of people who had read it. She hadn’t let me do it, but she’d recapped it. And it hadn’t been pretty.
I’d heard back from Caroline after I emailed her. She’d said to keep my head down for now. That it would probably only help book sales with the added drama. Which was morbidly comforting.
“I know,” I agreed. “Katherine Van Pelt, the insecure bitch.”
“Just imagine how many other people she’s hurt like this, Nat.”
I nodded. Oh, I’d thought about it. All the people who she’d ruined before me. Who weren’t strong enough to endure her. It had to be a long-ass list.
“I wonder how many there are,” I said. “And how they live now. Do they all have to stay on their knees, cut off because she said so? Why exactly does Katherine Van Pelt get to decide?”
“Because she’s made everyone else afraid of her. She’s ruthless. And she’s a fucking cat with nine lives. She always lands on her feet.”
“Yep. That’s exactly it. It’s because she’s never had consequences to her actions. She’s never had anyone make her pay for what she’s done. The worst thing she’s ever gone through is losing part of her trust fund. Boohoo.”
Amy scooped out another huge bite of chocolate icing. “So, are you going to go back into the city after this?”
I flopped back on the couch and stared at the ceiling. “I don’t know. I guess so. I have to clear out my apartment at least. I can’t stay there with fucking Lewis having surveillance footage of the building.”
“Yeah, creepy as fuck. Which is just so weird. I normally pick up on the creep vibe. And he really didn’t have it.”
I closed my eyes against that pain. “No, no, he didn’t.”
“I’m sorry. Let’s go back to cutting up Katherine. She’s easier to deal with than Lewis.”
“Maybe we should move to something stronger,” I suggested, setting my container of icing down.
“I’m down,” Amy said. “Let me see what I have.”
I reached for my phone, which I’d been mostly avoiding since everything had blown up. I’d only been checking to see if there was news from Caroline or Gillian. I’d had to suspend my Crew account because of the surge in activity. And the number of comments calling me a liar, fake, whore, bitch and every other imaginable dirty name.
I had a few texts from Melanie checking in, which I ignored. I’d invite her for a drink if she wasn’t attached at the hip to Michael. I scrolled to the next one from Jane.
Thinking about you! Please, please, please come back. New Year’s won’t be the same without you.
I sighed. Another thing to decide.
I’d clicked off the message, deciding not to answer, when my phone rang. I saw that it was Caroline and sat up straight before answering.
“Hey, Caroline,” I said. I hadn’t expected this.
“Natalie, I’m glad that you answered.”
“I’m surprised to hear from you. I thoug
ht you were in San Francisco with your son.”
“I am. But I just heard from Gillian.”
“You did?” I asked with dread at the way she’d said that. “I thought Warren was out until after the New Year.”
“Normally, yes, but she came back early. And I’m sorry, Natalie, it looks like she’s going to pass on the literary novel.”
My stomach sank. “She is?”
“Yeah, I didn’t want you to find out in an email. I know what you’ve been going through and thought it’d be better to hear it from me.”
“That’s…wow. She made it seem like she’d take anything I gave her.”
“I don’t think it had anything to do with what she wanted.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Well, after your pen name was announced, it seems that the company doesn’t think that someone who writes…mainstream tell-alls can produce the kind of literary novels they’re looking for.”
“Wait,” I said, standing abruptly. “You’re saying that…because I wrote Bet on It, which is still selling like crazy, I somehow can’t write any other kind of book?”
“That is how it was presented to me.”
“That’s bullshit,” I spat.
Caroline cleared her throat. “Between you and me, Natalie?”
“Yeah,” I muttered. Fury coursing through me at the ridiculous explanation.
“Gillian hinted that the rejection came from above her.”
“Okay…”
“All the way from the top.”
My heart stopped beating. “Lewis.”
“She didn’t say that outright, but that was my first guess, considering you told me about your unfortunate breakup.”
I blinked. I couldn’t believe this. Lewis had…blocked my book from publication. He had stripped me of the thing he knew that I loved most. The books he’d claimed to love as much as I did.
No.
No, he couldn’t do that.
But, of course, he could.
His family owned the fucking company. He could do whatever he pleased. Just like every other Upper East Sider. They had all the control, all the money, all the power. They were untouchable. And they could destroy my world in the blink of an eye.
Caroline was still rattling on. Telling me that she still planned to submit the book to other publishers. How it might be a good idea to choose another pen name for the literary novel if I still wanted to write it. Or maybe it was better to go back to Olivia and own that brand.
I nodded and said all the right things at the right times, but I wasn’t really listening. When I hung up, I stared blankly forward. Not with shock. No, something darker. Something that crawled out of that deep, dark place that I’d succumbed to six days ago. A place I hadn’t known existed, and I didn’t know who I would become if I unleashed it.
But I did know that I was done playing by my own moral code.
Done playing by the rules.
They were not going to get away with what they had done to me. They were not going to walk free and clean just because they had money and power. I had told Katherine I would make her pay for what she had done, and I had meant it. But it wasn’t until this moment that I knew that I would not stop until I got my revenge.
Until they all burned.
TO BE CONTINUED
* * *
Penn & Natalie return July 16th in…
CRUEL LEGACY.
Click to Preorder
Click for Release Alert
* * *
Darkness swept in.
Smothering everything in its inky black.
I have turned into their worst nightmares.
And I will not rest until they pay.
For everything.
* * *
Click to Preorder
Acknowledgments
This was the hardest book I have ever written. That might change in the future, but it took everything out of me to write this, and I’m so proud of how far I came to get to this point. But I would not have been able to get through this at all without the people behind me. Especially my husband Joel who put up with me working eighteen hour days for weeks on end while I recrafted the fifty thousand words that I deleted from the original manuscript and started over.
Most importantly Diana Peterfreund and Mari Mancusi, who finally saw the problem that we were all incapable of seeing, and helped me figure out how to navigate a major rewrite. You made the book so much stronger. I’ll never forget our walks through Dog Island in Austin as I was trying not to have a panic attack.
To all the other players who helped me structure and restructure this story until I was pleased. Since we all know that it took a lot to get me to that point. Rebecca Kimmerling for reading and rereading and plotting and replotting for all of eternity. Staci Hart for talking me through it for hours and making me laugh. Anjee Sapp for pushing me to go farther each time, to not tip toe around the issue and just dive right in. I need that. And for running everything for me when I had my freak out. Rebecca Gibson for telling me it didn’t suck, even when you were lying. Katie Miller, Polly Matthews, and Lori Francis who read the clean version and thought it was everything I wanted it to be.
Danielle Sanchez who loves this series and promotes the fuck out of it. You were there for me during release week panics, and I loved how much we stepped up and became a team! Jovana Shirley for awesome postpartum edits and always working me into the schedule. Sarah Hansen for this stunning cover. The green really pops! Lauren Perry for the photography. You always know the most beautiful people! Alyssa Garcia for all my hundreds of graphics that I request of you last minute…every time. Ashley Lindemann for her help with my newsletter, without you I would be a mess. Linde Squad for your tireless efforts and incredible energy around these books!
All the bloggers and readers who took the time to buy, read, review, promote, and gush about this book. I am so humbled by your love of my motley crew and their dark side. Penn and Natalie have been marinating for a long time. It brings me such joy to see that you love them as much as I do.
I can’t wait to bring you all more in this series, and I’m freaking out that it will be over. But stay tuned for the finale Cruel Legacy coming July 16th (the day after my birthday!).
A L S O B Y K. A. L I N D E
CRUEL
One Cruel Night
Cruel Money
Cruel Fortune
Cruel Legacy
* * *
Like stand alone companion novels about one big family—
WRIGHTS
The Wright Brother
The Wright Boss
The Wright Mistake
The Wright Secret
* * *
A single mom and widow discovers love again.
The Wright Love ✦ The Wright One
* * *
Like angsty second chance romance—
AVOIDING SERIES
Avoiding Commitment
Avoiding Responsibility
Avoiding Temptation
* * *
Avoiding Extras
Avoiding Intimacy ✦ Avoiding Decisions
* * *
Like scandalous political affairs—
RECORD SERIES
Off the Record
On the Record
For the Record
* * *
10 years of an open relationship until one of them changes the game. Stand alone spin off.
Struck from the Record
* * *
Newsletter exclusive! Read for free!
Broken Record
* * *
Like drama-filled sports romance —
ALL THAT GLITTERS SERIES
* * *
Golden girl to gold digger as she falls for the wrong man.
Diamonds ✦ Gold
* * *
A sexy Brit wants more than a one-night stand.
Emeralds ✦ Platinum
* * *
Second chance romance with the star quarterb
ack.
Silver
* * *
Like rockstars—
TAKE ME DUET
Take Me for Granted
Take Me with You
* * *
Like vampire paranormal romance about blood whores—
BLOOD TYPE SERIES
Blood Type
Blood Match
Blood Cure
* * *
Like YA romantic fantasy about a girl who discovers magic in a world where magic doesn’t exist—
ASCENSION SERIES
The Affiliate
The Bound
The Consort
The Society
* * *
Like a heart-pounding love story of one girl desperate to find herself again—
Following Me
* * *
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About the Author
K.A. Linde is the USA Today bestselling author of the Avoiding Series, Wrights, and more than thirty other novels. She has a Masters degree in political science from the University of Georgia, was the head campaign worker for the 2012 presidential campaign at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and served as the head coach of the Duke University dance team.
She loves reading fantasy novels, binge-watching Supernatural, traveling to far off destination, baking insane desserts, and dancing in her spare time.
