by Mercy Levy
Sudden panic hit him, he let go of Troy and walked into her room without knocking.
“What are you doing?” he asked. She didn’t answer but struggled with the lock of her suitcase. The racks where her things had previously been organized were all empty. He swung his gaze to her face and saw that it was tear-stained and her eyes were rimmed with red.
Panic turned to worry.
“Estelle, what’s wrong? Why are you packing your things? Is everything okay?” He closed the distance between them. His advancement only made her work faster.
“Answer me, Estelle. Stop, you’re going to hurt yourself,” he said sternly and tried to pull her hand away. Estelle stepped back before he could even touch her.
“It’s none of your concern what I do with myself,” she growled at him, surprising him. He searched her eyes for answers but found none. Suddenly his heart sank. Could she have heard him and his father talking about her earlier?
“It isn’t proper for you to be in my room without invitation,” Estelle said, suddenly the voice of propriety. “Please leave,” she said firmly.
Jared stood with his mouth open for a moment before finally nodding and walking out. His hands were shaking and he could feel his stomach churning. He found his father sitting on the couch where he’d been earlier.
“Did you say something to Estelle?” he asked. Before Nick could answer, Estelle came out of her room with the suitcase in tow. Both men turned to look at her.
She ignored Jared and looked straight at Nick. “I want to leave for Lincoln, Nick. As soon as possible.”
Nick rose to his feet and Jared stared at her flabbergasted.
“Estelle, what’s wrong, dear? Why do you feel the need to leave so suddenly?” Nick asked.
“I am sorry, I should have told you earlier that I was planning on leaving for Lincoln as soon as I was healed. Now is as good time as any other. I don’t want to delay any further and be more of a burden to you,” Estelle said, still not daring to look at Jared.
“Nonsense. You are no burden on us and you know that quite well. I don’t understand, what’s the rush? Christmas is almost here.”
“Please, Nick. I will be forever grateful for what you have done for me, but I need to go now. I have stayed here far longer than I intended and it is simply time for me to leave,” she said. She folded her arms across her chest in an act of defense. Jared mentally willed her to look his way but she was too stubborn to do so.
“You can’t leave yet. Not yet,” Jared spoke up for the first time.
“Jared is right, Estelle. Stay here a couple of days and then we’ll have the travel arrangements for you,” Nick added.
Jared studied her face for any hint of resignation but found none.
“I want to go right now! I can’t live here anymore.” Her voice rose for an instant before returning to its normal tone. She begged, “Please, Nick.” Her eyes glistened with tears that stabbed Jared deep in his heart.
“All right, dear. If this is what you want, I won’t object. After all it is your decision to make. But can you at least wait until morning? Jared can make the arrangements in the meantime,” Nick offered.
Estelle’s shoulders slumped and she looked away. “Alright. Thank you.”
Jared stared at her back as she retreated into her room. Why had she suddenly decided to leave? His father had said that Jared would make her travel arrangements but the thought of it made his blood run cold. He simply couldn’t let her go, not without a fight.
Chapter Seven
Estelle laid on the bed staring at the ceiling. She had been such a fool to fall for Jared, to think that he was anything other than what everyone else saw him to be. He was cold and incapable of caring. Once she had thought differently but after his outburst when Nick had suggested them marrying, she knew better. She just needed to get through this night and in the morning she could leave with her dignity intact. Estelle let her tears run freely and disappear into the pillow. She’d been so utterly heartbroken at his rejection and she couldn’t bear to see him do it to her face. She knew that leaving was the right thing to do. Her mother had wanted her to go to her Uncle Richard’s in Lincoln, so she would be the dutiful daughter and fulfil her mother’s last wishes.
Oh mama, she thought. How I wish you were still here. None of this would have happened if you were still here. You would have protected me.
It had taken her some time to digest that what she felt for Jared wasn’t reciprocated. At first she’d been shocked but then the heartache had set in. Tomorrow simply couldn’t come soon enough for her. The sooner she could put some distance between Jaren and herself the better for her heart to heal.
When morning came, she was up with the first streaks of the sun. She quickly dressed and packed her nightclothes. Just a couple of minutes more and then she was going to get out of this house.
Nick and Jared both were sitting at the breakfast table when she came out.
“The rail leaves at eight, correct?” she asked Nick, avoiding Jared as she had yesterday. Just to look at him was painful. He didn’t glance at her either and quietly ate his omelet.
Nick looked up at her and then at Jared. “I presume you haven’t looked outside.”
She stared at him in confusion and then walked to the kitchen window. Sliding the curtains away, she was greeted with a blanket of snow covering the entire area.
They were snowed in.
“No. No. No! This can’t happen.” She rushed toward the main door. “I have to go. I have to catch this train.”
She tried opening the lock.
“Estelle, calm down. We can get you on one as soon as they clear the roads,” Nick called to her. But Estelle was close to becoming hysterical. She was sure that if she had to spend one more moment in the knowledge that she had fallen for a man who could not care less about her, she was going to break. She could not stand the thought of one more loss.
She fumbled with the lock, trying the latch to open the door. Nick’s words were falling on deaf ears. Nick came up behind her and folded her into his arms. She turned into him and sobbed into his chest. She heard the chair scrape against the floor as Jared rose and left the room.
Estelle lifted her eyes to Nick’s and she saw in his gaze that he knew the reason for her wanting to leave.
“He doesn’t think he deserves you,” Nick said on a sigh. “He’s been hurt so deeply, he doesn’t think he has anything left to give to someone as well as you. It isn’t you Estelle, and you mustn’t think that it is. I love my boy dearly but he is damaged.”
Estelle nodded and wiped the tears from her cheeks. Nick had answered so many of her questions and assuaged so many of her doubts but she still felt empty inside. No matter the reason, if Jared refused to love her then she had to leave.
***
Jared stared out of the window. It was Christmas morning and snow had melted enough to allow passage on the roads... It was going to be Estelle’s last morning here in his house. The past two days had been pure torture. Being so close to her but knowing she was so far away was tearing him apart. As much as he didn’t want her to go, it was best if she did. He couldn’t bear the thought of hurting her or letting her hurt him.
He shrugged into his jacket and put on leather boots. The time was over. Today he was going to take her to the train station and watch her ride out of his life for good. He went to the kitchen and found her pouring herself a cup of coffee. She looked to beautiful, so much a part of the house and its daily routine that his breath caught in his chest. It didn’t matter though, she didn’t want to be there.
“Get your things ready. We’ll be leaving in an hour,” he said on his way out the door. While the rest of the town was waking up to Christmas celebrations, he was preparing to watch the most special woman he had ever known walk out of his life forever.
He readied his durable carriage on which he had travelled great distances. When he came back, Nick and Estelle were in the living room and exchanging gifts. She gave
him the pocket watch she had bought at the market.
“Hold no hard feelings in your heart for me, Nick. Please. It will kill me to know that I am leaving you with thorn in your heart.” Jared heard her saying.
“Not at all, sweet girl. I understand. I am just sorry that things turned out this way.” Nick engulfed Estelle in a hug.
“I’ll never forget you.” Nick kissed Estelle’s cheek and they both walked toward the door. Jared bent and picked up the suitcase.
“I’ll be back as quickly as the roads allow,” he bid his own farewell to Nick and then walked out.
The snow had melted but the road was still dangerous to travel, with deep ruts caused by all of the recent precipitation. Being Christmas the train wasn’t running and so Jared had agreed to take her to Lincoln himself. If she wanted out, he would see her out.
Jared drove the carriage carefully to keep from any mishap and fast enough to reach Lincoln in reasonable time. Knowing they couldn’t travel continuously, he planned on taking breaks at every three hour interval. Also he had friends in Kentucky and Kansas City who could provide them with fresh horses to avoid any unnecessary delay.
The ride was silent, both of them engrossed in their own thoughts. Jared knew that Estelle was going to stay with her uncle in Lincoln but he couldn’t help but wonder if her uncle was planning on marrying her off once she got there. That’s what guardians did with young girls wasn’t it? His stomach dropped at the thought of Estelle with another man. To think that she would share her smile, her laugh, her strength, and everything else that made her so amazing with anyone other than him made him absolutely crazy inside. He knew now that no matter what he thought of himself, how unworthy he felt that he was, he could not, would not let Estelle go.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he pulled the reins, causing horses to stop abruptly. Estelle shrieked behind him, calling his name.
Jared jumped off the carriage and paced on the road.
“Jared! What are you doing?” Estelle called and then she too climbed out of the carriage, rubbing her hands together to warm them. Jared stared at her hard. She was young, beautiful, innocent and pure. She was God’s gift and He had given her to him. Only he had been too blind to see it as a blessing.
“Why have we stopped here?” she asked him again. Jared closed the distance between them.
“Why do you want to go to Lincoln?” he asked her.
“What?” she asked, taken aback at his behavior.
“You heard me.”
“That’s none of your concern, Jared.” She tried to move away but Jared caught her by elbow.
“It is my concern. Tell me. Why were you so desperate to leave?” he asked.
“Let me go, we are in the middle of the road!!” she yelled.
“It is also Christmas morning. We should be inside celebrating with my father in our warm home. Now tell me why are we on road today?”
“Let go, Jared.” She kept fighting but he wouldn’t let her go.
“Tell me, Estelle. Why are you running away from me?” His question stilled her and she looked at him for a long moment.
“Isn’t that what you want Jared?” she asked him, tears starting to fall from her eyes. “You told your father you didn’t want to marry me. That’s fine, I understand if you want to be miserable and along with rest of your life but that doesn’t mean I have to be!” her voice rose. “I never found myself worthy of you, Estelle,” he said in low voice, coming closer to her. “Because you deserve the best, and God knows I am nothing close to good enough for you. I thought I wasn’t capable of giving you what you deserved. My insecurities and fears were holding me back and that was why I told my father I couldn’t marry you. I thought I deserved to be alone and miserable but I can see now that maybe you were sent to me to teach me otherwise.”
As he spoke, Estelle stared at him in surprise.
”I want to be a better man,” he continued. “You’ve made me feel things I haven’t let myself feel in a long time and it’s been scary, but it’s been so good. I want to be with you Estelle, I want to wake up and try every day to be the man that you deserve. Please tell me it isn’t too late, that my stubbornness and stupidity hasn’t cost me the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” he begged.
“I should slap you and send you back to your father alone,” she said looking at him. “But I love you the way you are,” she whispered.
Jared crushed her against him and looked deeply into her eyes. She was blushing and biting her lip.
“Say it again, Estelle.”
She looked up everything he needed to know was there in their depths. Jared pressed his forehead against hers. “I love you too, sweetheart.”
God had given him a second chance to rebuild his life, this time with the priceless gift of Estelle. He wasn’t going to take her for granted and waste a minute to start his forever with her.
“Marry me, Estelle.”
A wide smile spread across her face. “Yes,” she said.
Jared brought his lips to hers in a kiss that sealed their hearts together and signaled the beginning of the rest of their lives together.
THE END
Marie’s New Beginning
Chapter 1
Hello Mr. Translation
I wanted to yell and scream and throw a rock at the man who rode his horse through a muddle puddle causing the dirty water to splash up onto my pretty blue dress. I only spoke my native Spanish however, so I didn’t think it would have much effect. I must have looked rather silly standing out in front of a lovely brown hotel shaking my fist at thin air and yelling threats in a thick Spanish accent. As the people around me looked on in disinterest, I asked myself why on earth I had left my home in Spain and come to this confusing and muddy part of America.
“Little lady?” a voice asked.
Still shaking my fist in the air, I glanced over my shoulder, past my long black hair which I had tied in a ponytail, and spotted a young man who seemed to be about my age. I wanted to ask the young man what he wanted but I doubted it he knew how to speak Spanish. I stopped shaking my fist and pointed at the man who was riding out of town on his horse. The young man nodded his head. “Yeah, I saw. Old Bill isn't a nice guy. He comes into town and every now and then to buy some tobacco and then he goes back out to his claim and digs for gold.”
I had no idea what the young man was saying to me. His words seemed strange and his mouth looked funny as they formed them. It was obvious that I had to learn the native language or I was never going to be able to communicate properly. For the time being, however, the only means of communicating that were at my disposal were simple facial and body expressions. I pointed at the man again and shook my fist at him and then turned around and faced the young man. I was pleasantly surprised to see a handsome face that appeared to hold some intelligence. Of course, I could tell by the young man's work clothes that he was a ranch hand and not a high-class citizen. The young man didn't waste any time in examining me either. I could see his eyes soaking in my beautiful face and foreign blue eyes with curious attraction.
“Where are you from?” he asked me.
I raised my right hand to my lips and then made a straight line with my pointer finger and then shrugged my shoulders.
“Oh, you don't understand a word I'm saying, do you?” the young man said and then laughed to himself. “I saw you get off the stage and didn't think you were from around here.”
I stared into the young man's eyes and wondered what he was saying. His body language and facial expressions seemed innocent enough, if not altogether harmless. I pointed at the hotel and then pretended to yawn.
“Oh sure, you're tired,” the young man said and searched the ground for my luggage. He spotted two green suitcases. “My name is Joshua,” the young man said, “and you must be Maria. My folks have been expecting you.”
I watched Joshua push his blond hair out of his eyes and then reach into his pocket and retrieve a letter. He smiled and handed me the
letter. To my relief, the letter was in Spanish. I smiled. Joshua was the son of Mr. and Mrs. Garner, close friends of my Papa.
My Papa had been killed when I was only ten years old. The Garners, out of the kindness of their hearts, had paid for me to be educated in a lovely boarding school in Spain. I knew the letter I wrote them requesting to come to America must have come as a great shock. Mr. and Mrs. Garner expected me to begin teaching in Spain and eventually get married and begin a family of my own. Instead of meeting their expectations, I was standing out on a street covered with mud.
“Si, si,” I said and handed Joshua back the letter. “Maria,” I smiled and pointed at my muddy dress.
Joshua smiled at me and picked up my luggage. “My folks are away in Carson City right now. They'll be back in a week. In the meantime, Pa went ahead and paid for your stay at the hotel. You'll stay there until he gets back. You'll like the hotel. Old Lady...I mean, Mrs. Finner, is some cook, let me tell you.”
I pointed at my lips again and shook my head. Joshua stopped talking and nodded his head at the hotel and then smiled. “Follow me.” He started to walk toward the brown building and gestured for me to follow.
I was in a strange land covered with mud, exhausted from a long journey, hungry, and in desperate need of sleep. Joshua, even though he was only a stranger to me, was my only anchor in the storm. I followed him gratefully.
The hotel lobby was filled with expensive furnishings fit for a king and queen; a soft green parlor couch here, a beautiful hardwood coffee table sitting in front of a soft white sitting cushioned reading chair there. Long, delicate burgundy drapes hung over a doorway leading into the dining room; my eyes absorbed the lobby with relief and happiness. The town of Blue Pine appeared somewhat small, but judging by the number of people in the street, the horse traffic, and the busy general store, I assumed that the county was probably inhabited more than I realized.
