"I don't want you to stop," I rise up thrusting my hips into him, so that he is fully in me. My legs are wrapped around him, holding him tight against me as he begins pumping his length in and out, faster and faster, his pace quickens. His sweat is dripping down and trickling onto my skin, mixing with mine and I never want to wash him from my body. I want to stay wrapped up in his arms forever and a day.
"Harder," I purr digging my nails into his back so deep, I am sure I have made marks. There is no need to tell him twice. He hooks my legs over his arms and drives into me harder than I thought possible, he slams into me repeatedly until I cry out his name, feeling as though I have shattered into thousands of tiny pieces, like a star bursting. He spills his passion inside of me and we lie there with ragged breathing, entwined with one another, unspeaking unable to put into words what we just shared.
"I never thought anyone could ever make me the way you just did." I admit, noticing a change in Striker as he looks at me. "What's' the matter, did I say something wrong?"
"No, you were perfect, you are flawless," he kisses my cheek and leads me into the shower. Striker is so sweet to me, taking his time washing me with care. After we share a shower, he wraps me in a fluffy towel and spoons me in his bed until I fall asleep. As my eyes flutter shut, I cannot help but think that this should have been my first time. But I am hoping there are many more nights just like this one to come.
12
Rebel
Banging on my brother's apartment door bright and early, I notice it is taking him forever to get to the damn door. He has never been much of an early riser. "Open up motherfucker, we gotta' have breakfast with mom before we hit the road." I bang my fist on the door once more.
Finally Striker opens the door looking like he just went to bed. "Damn brother, thought I was going to have to break the door down. Wake yo' ass up, we got shit to do. Hope you have your shit packed." Striker fumbles his way into the kitchen and I see baby brother has been busy, scratches down his back; his hair is sticking up in every direction. "Looks like Aspen road your ass hard last night." He doesn't confirm or deny it. He must have had a wild time last night as I look around the evidence of his good time. There are empty beer bottles and stems lying on the coffee table.
Striker picks a shirt up off the floor and slides it over his head. "Fuucck, you aren't even packed yet are you? Too busy getting those nuts off last night. Yo' Aspen, come on wake up, no sleep for the wicked if ya want to see your man off."
Panic washes over my brother's face, "Keep your fucking voice down," he grits through his teeth pushing me into the wall.
"Easy brother, you could have told me you have some strange, fuck. So who is it, which'd you, bring home?" I punch him the stomach and hand him a cup of coffee.
"No one you'd know." He pulls some shorts from the bathroom floor over his boxers. I don't believe the cocksucker but we don't have time to dick around so I leave him to kick his guest out so we can go get our grub on. I'm fucking starved out. I stayed up half the night talking to Rumor, making sure she had all of my information and talking about this shit with Rush. I had to tell her the rest of the story, about how Rush thinks Baby is his daughter. She knows to keep an eye on Baby and to try to keep her around home as long as she can. They are safe as long as they are on our grounds. She asked Grim if Baby could go to Chicago with her to help her get settled but the old man was set dead against it.
Trouble pulls up to meet us, he is following us up in his car with our bags, since we don't know how long we will be in the windy city.
"Where is Striker?"
"Slow ass motherfucker is up there kissing his strange bye."
Trouble raises a curious brow and smiles with a laugh. "Don't ask me, he wouldn't tell me."
"Must have got him a butterface bitch, everything looks good but her face." Trouble laughs.
"How about you, who'd you, take home last night?" I light up a smoke and toss Trouble his lighter back.
"Fuck if I know. Some bitch that needs to know how to do less talking and more sucking." I laugh being choked in the middle of inhaling a drag off my cigarette. The kid is alright. He is going to be fun once we get to Chicago.
Striker comes rushing down the stairs looking pissed, "Would you two shut the fuck up, I can hear ya'll all the way upstairs." He has his glasses on and looks somewhat awake. "Well what are you two pussy footing around for let's go eat, I'm motherfuckin' hungry." I shrug my shoulders at Trouble as he gets in his car to follow us over to moms for breakfast. My brother is never this protective over an easy lay, I would question him further, but we are running behind.
"Hey," I holler at my brother, "does Baby need a ride over?"
"You go ahead; I'll swing by and get her."
Baby
I wake up to a loud banging on the door, cracking my eyes open, it feels as though I just went to sleep. Striker is cursing under his breath and our bodies are tangled, his legs are wrapped in mine, his firmness poking me in the rear. Oh shit, it wasn't a dream, as I feel my chest, realizing I am still naked from last night. He kisses me on the forehead and tells me to go back to sleep, but how in the hell can I sleep now as memories of him and what we did last night flood my mind. My cheeks heat along with other parts of me as I relive his touch, the sweet things he said to me. I'd like to have an encore of his performance last night.
I shoot straight up in the bed as I hear Rebel's voice yelling for Aspen, and then I feel like I was just punched in the gut as I hear Striker telling him he spent the night with no one he would know. I mean I didn't expect him to just come out and say I slept with Baby last night but it still stings. We didn't talk about anything, I don't know if he wants anything to come of this but, I hope he does after the things he confessed, the feelings he professed he has felt for me for years.
Striker comes into his bedroom and tells me we will talk soon. I know he is leaving this morning but I don't know...he is giving me the brush off and it hurts.
"Don't worry; I'll make sure no one sees me leaving." I stand with the sheet wrapped around me and start looking for my clothes.
"Baby, I don't mean it like that. It's just this is a bad time ya know. I am running late, I promise I will call you when I get to Chicago. Don't leave angry okay. I don't want to leave things weird between us."
"Then don't make them weird," I kiss his cheek and let him walk out of the door as much as it hurts I know I have to let him go.
As I am getting ready to leave, Striker comes rushing back up the stairs. For a moment, I think he is back because he is going to apologize. "Hey, I feel like an ass, but you promised you'd be at family breakfast this morning." Not the apology I was hoping for but it is a start.
"I look and feel like shit, and I am not very hungry."
"For me, for mom, she misses you." Striker knows how to press my buttons and when he gives me that puppy dogface, I can't say no.
"If you'll go to my car, I have a bag with a change of clothes in it."
**
Riding on the back of Striker's soft tail, I only wish I could always be the one riding back here, but I know he is going to Chicago and Aspen will be there and he will stay with her, they have history, we shared one night.
When we get to Foxie's there is more people here than I anticipated, I thought it would be Foxie, Trouble, Rebel, and us. But it seems Striker failed to mention Aspen and Rumor were going to be here. Striker parks his bike and I take off my brain bucket. He walks up onto the porch and Aspen jumps in his arms wrapping her legs around his waist, "I missed you last night what happened to you. I thought we were going to hangout after I left dinner at my parent's house." She plants a kiss on his lips, the lips that were all over me hours ago. Striker looks caught off guard, maybe he didn't know she'd be here and it sounds as though he blew her off to be with me.
"I..." he stutters trying to think of a lie and it makes me angry though I know he doesn't want to cause a scene, but damn it can't he say Baby is my girl now bitch get the fuck off
me?
Foxie interrupts saving him face. "There's my girl, get over here and give me a hug. You are bones, see what happens when you stop coming by and letting me feed ya. I know Sunshine can't cook for shit." Foxie wraps me up in her arms and I almost cry when I realize how much I have missed her. She moved out of the trailer she shared with Slim after the boys did, said it didn't feel like home anymore. She now has a small place off the freeway near the Fox's Den. I have stayed away for many reasons and now it seems as though Striker just gave me another reason to put more distance between us.
Inside we all sit wherever we can fit. Aspen sits by Rumor at the counter; I sit at the table with Foxie, and Trouble. Rebel and Striker are leaning against the counter where their girls are. I can't help but watch them all, wishing I was the one over there with Striker. I can feel the anger, the hurt bubbling up inside of me, the longer I watch, I can feel the tears pricking at the corner of my eyes.
"You okay," Foxie follows my eyes, thinking I am looking at Rebel and Rumor, but she has no clue that her other son has my heart squeezing the life out of it.
"I just feel so awful that I haven't been by to see you." I lie trying not rip apart and make a scene.
"Well you know you always have a place at my house. My door is always open." She hugs my shoulders and the tears I was holding in leak out. Aspen feeds Striker a piece of bacon and it is more than I can take right now. I shove back from the table and walk out onto the porch I have lost what little of an appetite I had left.
Trouble joins me on the porch, he wraps his arms around me, not knowing what in the hell I had an outburst over. "Can you take me home?" I can't stay here and watch as Striker plays the perfect boyfriend. I don't know why I am so upset he made no promises to me and I didn't ask him to.
"Sure give me a minute." Trouble goes into the house to arrange to meet up with the guys in a few minutes to start their trip. I don't have the energy to go back in there and face them, any of them. I don't know why but I suddenly feel so alone and ashamed.
As we are getting in the car, Striker comes out and gives me my brain bucket. He leans down to the car but Aspen is watching him, so he brushes his thumb over my lip, "I'll call you."
"Sure," I smile weakly, trying to put on a brave face.
Trouble turns on the car and a song so fitting for this moment starts to play as the guy sings, 'don't you want me baby'.
Rebel
Over at my mom's having our last family breakfast for a while, I notice Baby and Striker is both acting off. My mom is talking to Baby but I can see Baby clearly staring a hole through my brother and Aspen and then it clicks. He spent the night with Baby. That dumb motherfucker, has really went and done it now. Whom else would he have been so protective over?
Baby abruptly slams her chair back from the table with tears spilling down her face. I want to go after her but Trouble has beaten me to it. I see my brother swallow the lump in his throat, fighting with indecision the desire to chase after Baby—his loyalty to her, or to choose Aspen and to save face for her. I watch as he makes the choice to go after her but it's too late and if he says anything now it will only cause a scene and make an even bigger shit storm, and we are already running late. We need to ride out.
I feel bad for Baby, I know how much it hurt watching Rumor and Tread, and we weren't together, shit we still aren't but we are taking things slow. And I'd wait forever for Rumor if she wants me to. She says we'd see how things go, whatever that means. Isn't it usually the guy saying that shit.
Rumor
Watching Rebel drive away on his Harley knowing that it will be weeks before I see him again hurts more than I thought it would. I don't know what in the hell Baby's problem was at breakfast, I tried to talk to her after Aspen dropped me off at the house but she said she just needed to be alone. I guess she is still hurting over that shit with Lucky. I wish I could make her feel better, but I have my own problems to deal with.
Rebel wants to claim me, but I am nowhere near ready for that I am not sure I even want to be with him. I care about him a lot, but the whole point of my going to Chicago is to try to live a normal life outside of the club, there is no in-between. Either you are in the life or you aren't.
Aspen is coming back by later for a girl's movie night. I asked Baby to join us but she said she is having dinner with Foxie. I think she is lying because she was all for watching a movie with me until I mentioned Aspen, then she backpedaled saying she promised Foxie dinner. And hello, we are watching Magic Mike, no one turns that down, not even me, unless there is someone, you don't want to see—Aspen, but why? I know she is avoiding Channing.
13
Baby
The weight of the past few days comes crashing down on me and I feel like I can't breathe, like a forest after a fire—barren, broken, dead inside. Lucky keeps texting me demanding to speak to me. I don't have it in me to deal with him right now. Striker said he would call, but it's been three days and I know they made it to Chicago all in one piece. Trouble is coming home in a few days he has called me regularly, because he actually cares I guess. We have yet to talk about him feeding information to Lucky; I can't lose Trouble right now, I just can't deal with any more heartache.
Losing Rebel hurt deep, Lucky's betrayal is a bitter pill to swallow, and keeping his secret is killing me. But this hurts far more worse than anything I have ever felt. Striker was different...he was the one. I know he was and it may seem dumb and some might say I am way too young and that spending one night with a guy means nothing but I can still feel his thumb brushing over my lips, his kisses still linger on my neck. I was so sure he would never use me, that he would never hurt me. Damn was I ever wrong about him. He is just like Slim.
After another three days of moping around, I am angry, how dare Striker use me up and spit me out like one of the whores from the Fox's Den. I have a good mind to go and tell his mom what he has done to me, but I don't want to break her heart, she has suffered enough hurts through the years and I won't add to them. She has been trying to get me to come over and spend the night with her, I know Striker doesn't live there but it just brings up feelings and memories I don't want to recall. And fucking Rumor keeps inviting me to hangout with her and Aspen, but I can't I am afraid I will tell her the truth about her ideal fucking boyfriend. I probably should tell her, but she is going to be Rumor's roommate and I won't fuck that up for her. She is so keyed up about her big move. No, I will not say anything at all; I will be a noble sister.
**
I am working in the kitchen at the Roadhouse when Romeo comes to the window to place his order. Sunshine is in the office handling paperwork, leaving me to face him alone. I haven't set eyes on or spoken to him since graduation night. "Hey kid," he smiles at me winking, making my stomach drop. Every time I think of what he and I did, I feel like the biggest loser ever.
"What can I get ya," I take out my pad for orders.
"I don't need anything, but uh have ye heard anything else about ya know." He looks as uncomfortable as I feel. I know what he means I try not to think about it—ever. I try not to think about Striker either it has been weeks but yet he still takes up most of my thoughts.
"Nope, I'll let you know on a need to know basis." I place my hands firmly on the counter and give him a nod.
"Appreciate it, oh and uh I think LL is going to be hiring a new babysitter, she hasn't said anything but I know she thinks something, and well with her being pregnant again I think it is best she isn't upset any." Wow, I did not know that they were expecting again this will make them three. Men like Romeo make me sick, they think they can just use women on the side then crawl in bed with their unknowing wives. Moreover, you now what that is probably the kind of life Striker wants. Fuck, I am better off without him. Maybe I should take Lucky up on his offer and just disappear. His proposal is sounding more appealing by the minute.
After my shift ends I go into my closet and begin looking for that invitation that I first received to meet Rush, I bet Lucky
is there right now. I think I will surprise him; there is nothing left for me here. I find the envelope I was searching for and take a quick shower. Grim is nowhere to be seen and Sunshine is still over at the Roadhouse. Rumor left for Chicago with Aspen yesterday on their great big adventure. So I leave a note for Grim that I am going to hangout with Trouble. He has been keeping his distance since he came back from Chicago, him Rebel and Striker probably had a good laugh on my part trading I fucked Baby over stories, bastards.
Pulling in at the old filling station, I immediately recognize Lucky's motorcycle. Let's see how true he is to his word. I walk in dressed to fuck or die. Is that not what Lucky told me the first night we met? I am wearing my knee high leather studded boots Foxie bought me last Christmas paired with a leather mini and a black halter top, showing my assets and tattoos proudly. That fat asshole Roy is sitting in the same spot he was last time I was here, playing that damn poker machine. Lucky isn't here up front he must be somewhere in the back. Roy does a double take at me. "Goddamn sweetheart, can I help you?"
"I'm looking to get Lucky, he here." I wink and the old fart about has a heart attack. That is probably the most action he has seen in years.
"He's in the back, is he expecting you?" He is still trying to recover from my flirtation.
"Does it matter?" I lick my lips and he shakes his head no.
Walking back where Rush took me once before I notice most of the doors are shut. When I get to what used to be the storage room, I find the Devils Rejects having a party in full swing and what do you know, Lucky has a bitch between his legs and Trouble is sitting to his left with a bitch between his. Lying pricks.
My arrival is going unnoticed so I decide to take things up a notch. 'Cherry Pie' by Warrant is playing over the stereo. There is an empty table in the middle of the room. Using a chair to step onto the table, I decide to put on a little show, see if that gets Lucky's attention. I am not on the table doing a swirl of my hips for barely a minute before Lucky is pulling me off it. His brother's protest and Lucky takes me into the hall and pulls me into a musky dark room.
Baby (Black Rebel Riders' MC) Page 10
