“These are amazing.” Another click and my image filled the screen again. “God, is that really me?”
I was wearing his shirt and looking out the window. Even as my face heated from the embarrassment of seeing myself nearly naked, I couldn’t look away. He’d been true to his word that no one would know it was me unless one of us told them. I didn’t really care. He’d somehow made me a part of this fantasy world, a living creature amid the decay.
When I finally clicked through the rest of the pictures and was able to look at Reid once again, I was shocked to see him sitting there, staring down at the floor. This wasn’t simply being nervous about showing someone else his pictures, he looked genuinely scared.
I set the laptop aside and slipped onto my knees, ignoring the pain in my knee and ankle from where I’d fallen. Reid didn’t move. I came close enough to be able to rest my hands on his knees, giving them a gentle squeeze. “You’re the most talented photographer I’ve ever seen.”
He snorted. “You need to get out more.”
“I’m being serious.”
“So am I.”
“Why don’t you try and set up a showing? Or if you want to start slower, see about getting one or two of your photographs displayed somewhere.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
He covered my hands with his. Sweat from his palms dampened my skin. “These aren’t for anyone else.”
The wild look in his eyes told me how close to panic he was. It was something I’d seen before with some of the women from the shelter where I volunteered. The overwhelming fear that hits a survivor of trauma hard, that can push them to the edge and quickly over. I couldn’t let that happen to him, not when I could do something to stop it.
I leaned in so my lips were only a breath away from his. I waited until he looked me in the eye, his breath washing over my face as he sighed.
“What are you doing?” he whispered.
“I hate getting my picture taken, but those were beautiful.”
“I had a perfect subject.”
“I want to thank you.”
The spark in his eyes came back, which set my heart rate flying. “How do you plan on doing that?”
It took no effort to lean in and press my lips to his. The kiss began gentle enough, but within moments it deepened. Whether it was because of what I’d seen in the pictures, or if it was simply being with Reid that did this to me, something loosened inside me and my tension eased. He saw me as a beautiful creature made up of shadows and light. I didn’t need to hear the words from him to know.
Sliding my hands up his thighs, I skipped over his groin until my fingers found the warm, bare skin of his stomach. His muscles tensed beneath my touch, which only encouraged me to continue my exploration. Reid was hot, sexy and passionate. It was obvious why any woman would be attracted to someone like him, but for me it wasn’t good looks that drove my desire.
I needed to be with him. For the first time in my life, I was ready to let my guard down and lay myself bare. I wanted to be the woman in the pictures and I wanted him back in my life.
Reid wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his lap. His cock was hard against my ass, a promise of things to come. Together we removed my sweater, leaving my hard nipples visible beneath the thin cotton of my shirt. Rather than strip it off as well, he slid his hands beneath the fabric and cupped my breasts. His thumbs teased the sensitive tips as he kneaded my flesh, all the while his mouth was devouring mine.
My head spun as my arousal increased. God, I’d never been with a man who could turn me on as quickly or consistently as Reid. Shifting in his lap, I straddled him in the chair, putting my pussy against his cock, our fabric barriers doing little to stop our need to rut and grind against each other.
“I want you...to lick me...like you did before.” Fuck, I never got this forward with men, telling them what I wanted. “Pinch my nipples hard. I like that.”
“Jesus Christ.” He stood, taking me with him. Within seconds I was stretched out on the bed and he was stripping my pants and panties from me.
I spread my legs wide, reached up and squeezed my breasts through my shirt. “Please.”
He tossed his glasses on the nightstand and pulled me to the edge of the bed as he knelt and pressed his mouth to my clit. Gasping, I buried one of my hands in his hair, while I squeezed the quilt with the other. He was relentless with his mouth, licking and sucking my clit. He pressed his fingers into me, filling and fucking me with an unrelenting rhythm that took me to the edge of orgasm within seconds.
“Shit.” I squeezed my eyes and cried out as my orgasm slammed into me with a force that knocked all reason from my mind. Waves of pleasure ignited through me, a spark to gunpowder. He didn’t stop even as my orgasm waned, licking around my clit as though he was trying to capture every last drop of my come.
My breath came out in pants as he finally stood and looked down at me. I watched him, wanting to see what he would do next, hoping there would be more than that. When he finally stripped and grabbed a condom from his suitcase, I knew exactly what I wanted from him.
“Get on the bed. On your back.”
He hesitated for a moment before complying. The second he was settled I took the condom and rolled it down his cock. Then I swung my leg over and settled myself down on his shaft. Unlike our previous times together, I felt as though I was able to be the one in control, the one who could give back some of the pleasure he’d given me. With our gazes locked, I got my feet into position and slowly began to fuck myself on his cock.
“Fuck,” he whispered, but he didn’t look away.
His thick shaft stretched my pussy, touching all the hidden sensitive spots that I sometimes forgot existed. Whether it was from my hard and fast orgasm, or from the connection I felt we shared, my arousal increased again. Coming more than once when I’d already had one overwhelming orgasm was exceptional. But this man brought me to a place I didn’t know before, saw me as the person I wanted to be, not the person I thought I had to be.
He held one of my hips in his hand while the other one sought out my breast beneath my shirt. The first pinch of my nipple sent a wave of pain and pleasure through my body. The second seemed to be a direct line to my pussy. My clit pulsed with each tweak and before long I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. My pussy was wet from desire, easing the way for me to slam my body down hard on his cock.
Reid moaned and his fingers flexed hard against my hip. “I’m going to fucking come.”
“Not yet.” I could feel my second orgasm. It was just out of reach, but coming closer.
“God, baby.” He pinched my nipple harder. “Come on. I can’t...hold out.” Another groan and he began to meet my body with each thrust. “Look at me.”
My eyes opened as if in reflex. His face was flushed and sweaty as I rode him. The muscles in his neck were tensed, strained as we moved together. His pupils were blown wide, and little remained of the stunning green that first caught my attention back at the airport. His lips were parted and I could see the white of his teeth and the pink tip of his tongue. I leaned forward, letting my hands brace against his shoulders, connected yet separate.
The new angle put added pressure on my clit. It was enough to push me hard and fast into another orgasm. I screamed and curled my fingers into his skin as I ground my body down hard onto his cock. Reid’s eyes squeezed closed before he turned his head and pressed his face to my arm.
“Fuck!” His body tightened around me as he came.
I continued to grind and writhe against him, drawing out both of our releases as long as possible. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close to his chest as he met my movements. Exhaustion won out over pleasure and eventually we both stopped moving.
My body tingled with bliss as I lay on him, my ear on his shoulder and my
nose pressed to his neck. His scent was comfortable and I relaxed fully.
Reid ran his fingers through my hair, pushing it away from my face. “We should get cleaned up.”
His cock was surprisingly still hard inside me. “You seem like you’re ready for action again.”
“You drive me fucking nuts.” He kissed my forehead. “Slide over. I’ll get us a cloth.”
The necessity for post-sex cleanup didn’t take any of the shine off what we’d done. There was none of the awkwardness I normally felt with a lover. If anything, I enjoyed watched him walk naked to the bathroom and back, unabashedly ogling his muscular back and legs. I didn’t look away when he returned, the condom gone and a facecloth in hand. He smiled and gave his head a little shake when he caught me staring.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re a shitty liar.”
“I have an excellent poker face. My brain is just too mushy at the moment for me to bother using it.” Reid gently pressed the cloth between my legs. He’d used warm water and the heat was as arousing as it was soothing. I opened my legs a bit wider to give him better access. “I never thought we’d be doing this again.”
He threw the cloth in the direction of the bathroom before stretching out beside me on the bed. “Yeah.”
“It’s so weird. It’s like we’ve changed, but not really.”
“You’re still you.”
His mouth was right there, so I kissed him softly. “It’s like I’m someone else when I’m with you. I’m that woman in your pictures.”
“I hate to tell you, but that has nothing to do with me.”
“Are you kidding? I can count on one hand the number of pictures of myself I actually like. I couldn’t believe it was me in the ones you showed me. I think you really need to look into getting an agent. You must have some connections from working with the show. Maybe Brian can suggest—”
Reid rolled away to set his feet on the floor. “Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“I told you that I had no intention of sharing them with others.”
“Well, yes, but I assumed you were saying that to reassure me. I don’t mind if you want to—”
“No.”
“But—”
“No.” He looked back over his shoulder at me and his eyes had gone hard.
The relaxation I’d been drifting in vaporized in a blink. I shivered from his absent body heat and wanted nothing more than to get dressed and head back to my room. This wasn’t exactly how I’d anticipated this evening going. “Maybe I should go.”
When he didn’t say anything, I scooted down the bed in search of my clothing. My hands shook and my chest ached as I dressed. Not bothering with my shoes, I picked them up and headed for the door.
“Tamara—”
“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have pushed. I guess I haven’t changed that much after all.” Opening the door, I blinked in the harsh hallway light. “I’ll see you tomorrow on set.”
Without waiting for him to answer, I closed the door and dashed back to my room. I managed to make it inside before the tears began to fall.
Chapter Ten
Despite having three more days of filming, we still have lots to accomplish. I’ve been keeping Reid busy coordinating with the judges and the set designers. He hasn’t been himself recently, but he isn’t willing to talk about it. Our judges have been better on set and on camera, though it’s clear they still don’t like one another. Only a few days to go and we can say goodbye to this show.
Production Notes, Brian Merrick, Director
Our final four contestants were frantically creating a showcase room that represented their ideal storefront for their business. It was exciting as much as it was a relief to know that soon we would be done and I’d be able to go home.
I’d never been this tired in my life.
Rene and I had formed a bit of a pleasant acquaintance with our time together. I wouldn’t call it a friendship, or even a potential one, but it did make working with her better. Jennifer mostly kept her distance, though she never hesitated to throw the occasional barb my way, or do her best to flirt outrageously with Reid whenever he came near.
My gaze drifted over to where Reid was currently talking with Brian. Since our little falling-out in his room, we hadn’t said much of anything to one another. I couldn’t figure out how to apologize for what I’d done. Sitting alone in my room had only driven home how fucking stupid I’d been. I didn’t have a clue what he’d been through in the army. He’d flat out told me that it was his shrink who got him into photography in the first place. Only an idiot would push a person’s therapy into the limelight.
It wasn’t my place to say anything. I had no opinion on his life. If our positions were reversed, I would have reacted the same way he had.
Major fuckup, Tamara.
It was just one more thing piled on all the stuff I’d screwed up on this trip. When I got back to Toronto I’d have to find a way to tell Sophia that I hadn’t got the contract for Reality Life and that we were in trouble. As much as I wanted to be perfect, I clearly wasn’t.
“Ladies.” Brian came in from the side door. “I’ve just been checking on our contestants and they are doing great. We want to bring you all in now for an evaluation of what they’ve done to this point.”
We picked up our clipboards and followed Brian into the section of the warehouse where the finalists were working with their crews to build their showrooms. Most appeared to be doing well, having finished most of the shell of the room. Two of the women and the one man who’d made it this far all seemed to have a good handle on their borrowed crews, directing them where they needed to go. But it was clear that our oldest contestant, Elsie, was having problems.
I made my way over to where she was standing in the middle of her set. The crew had been instructed not to do anything that they weren’t told to do, leaving the full responsibility of the design on the finalist. Elsie didn’t look my way when I approached, but I could easily see how upset she was.
Being the hard-ass judge on the show left me with the task of pushing the contestants even when they didn’t want to be. It was a natural mode for me to slip into, even if I didn’t always like it. “How are things going?”
“Not very well.” There was a quiver in her voice. One of the cameramen had been following me as I’d moved around. I really didn’t want him to capture this woman breaking down on film, even though Brian would assure me that it would make excellent television.
“What’s the problem? Are you stuck on your design?”
“No.” Elsie had been one of our quieter contestants, and had done her best to avoid me at all costs. “Everything is fine.”
A quick glance at her crew was enough to dispel that remark. “You’re falling behind the other finalists.”
“I’m aware.”
I’d secretly been rooting for her from the beginning. She had some of the better design ideas, even if her execution had been a little off. She was a self-taught designer and with a little guidance had the potential to become first-rate.
“Can I see your plan?” I didn’t move in until I saw her reluctant nod. The sketches were rough, but it was obvious that she’d put a lot of thought into the setup. Again, it was her inexperience that was holding her back. “It looks great. You’re coming at it from all over the place, though. You might want to list out the tasks, figure out the timing, then assign your crew to handle the tasks. When you’re a professional—”
“I know what to do!” Elsie spun on me, her hands clenched at her sides. “I’m not a child that needs to be told! Certainly not from a prissy bitch!”
The force of her shout brought all action on the set to a halt. My heart started pounding and my body shook. The cameraman was still rolling, b
ut I could feel tension coming off him in waves. Instinctively, I lowered my chin a fraction and smiled. “Yes, I can see that.”
“I’m tired of this.” Elsie marched forward until she was right in my face. “For years I’ve worked my ass off. This is my last shot and you’ve done nothing but tear me down. Tear everyone down. Do you even have a heart?”
The set was so quiet I could hear the cars outside rushing past. Shock could be a powerful thing. I was able to see Elsie clearly in that moment. The way her eyes were wide and wild. How hard her pulse was beating in her neck. She was stressed, angry and correct. I had no right to tell her what to do. Not only did it go against the rules of the contest, it placed undo pressure on her.
I probably should have smiled, but I didn’t. “Yes, I have a heart. Of course I do. Everyone on this set has a heart. From the show’s conception the point was to discover talented people and give them an opportunity to show us what they could do.”
My voice was steady, but my hands were shaking. I squeezed my clipboard, needing to feel its solid presence to help ground me. Movement caught my attention—it was Reid crossing the floor, no doubt to put an end to this. I gave my head a little shake and he stopped dead.
Returning my attention to Elsie, I took a breath. “I want to apologize to you. You’re right, I’ve been a hard-ass throughout this competition. That’s my role, what I was hired to do. I’m the one to poke and prod, pushing people to their limits to see just how good you are. I get excited when I see obvious talent like what you’ve shown us. It gets me so excited I want to push that person into the spotlight so everyone else can see what I do.”
I let my gaze slip over to Reid. His mouth had slipped open, making me want to kiss him. “I don’t have a creative bone in my body. I’m a businesswoman. I admire people who are able to make me look at things differently. Who can make me see things differently. That’s a gift that I’ve always believed should be shared.”
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