Sophie chewed her lip. “Do you think going would be, uh…”
Safe. She left the word unsaid but his eyes clearly registered.
He nodded slowly. “We’ll be in my car, in a very public place.”
Which helped on a number of levels, like giving them a buffer rather than sitting together here all night turned inside out with wanting each other and not knowing what the hell to do about it.
She pulled the hair tie off her wrist and scraped back her hair into a low ponytail. “We could eat supper at the amusement park.”
Footsteps echoed on the dock and Sophie looked over fast. Madison walked toward them, looking sleek as ever in black Lycra pants and a tank. Her hair lifted in the wind, held back only by a headband. How had she slipped up on them? She had such an airy way of moving.
“Are you four ready for supper yet? I have a stack of take-out menus to choose from.”
David’s hand fell on Sophie’s shoulder. “Mad, we’re heading over to the amusement park. Want to come with us?”
She scrunched her nose. “Too much cotton candy and caramel apple temptation. I think I’ll pass.”
Haley Rose linked fingers with her aunt, bracelets and long, dark hair giving Haley Rose a mini-me look up next to Madison. “There’s other stuff to do there besides eat. You’ll have fun.”
Madison smoothed her hand over her niece’s head. “I think I can figure out something to keep myself entertained. Go enjoy your outing with your parents.”
Haley Rose scrunched her nose in Brice’s direction. “I hope nobody thinks you’re my brother.”
He rolled his eyes. “Who cares what people think? It’s not like we’re a family.”
Family? Sophie looked up fast at David.
Panic tingled in her veins. Only a few hours spent together and things were spiraling out of control. An affair would be easy.
But family? That was a whole other matter.
* * *
Madison fed lemon ice cream to her naked lover as they stretched out on a white faux-fur rug in front of the fireplace. She’d cranked the A/C to counteract the fireplace crackling…romantically? She shied away from the softer image that word created.
Not romantically—sensually. Her encounters with Caleb were about sex. They both agreed on that point from the start. She’d been hurt too many times in the past, expecting more from a man only to have him take everything she offered and give nothing of himself back.
With Caleb, everything was out in the open, the ground rules were clear. This man wasn’t going to have the chance to divorce her for a trophy wife. Caleb definitely wasn’t like her first husband who’d left her unsatisfied, then blamed her for being frigid.
And her abusive boyfriend back when she was in high school? She would kill any man who ever dared to slap her around now.
She dipped another bite of ice cream and offered it to Caleb.
He cleaned the spoon, then kissed her wrist tenderly. “Are you sure we’re alone for the evening? It would be embarrassing as hell to have someone walk in on us.”
“The grandmother went to a friend’s house until ten. The amusement park is open until one a.m. I figure we’re easily safe until nine thirty. Which gives us twenty-five more minutes. Think you’re up to some speed sex?”
He lifted a lock of her hair and stroked the full length. “I would just hate for anyone to walk in and see you, anyone other than me, I mean.” He squeezed her hip gently, his palm calloused and perfectly masculine against her skin. “Because you are the most amazing woman I’ve ever been with, and I’m not liking the idea of sharing.”
“Feeling possessive is against the rules.” She gripped his wrist and pushed his arm away.
“Are you seeing someone else?” he asked casually, too much so for the heat in his green eyes.
“You mean am I sleeping with someone else?”
“Are you?” His voice went hard.
She didn’t know whether to be irritated or flattered. Then she reminded herself of how crummy his life was right now with the trial, the possibility of losing his career, even his freedom.
She set aside the bowl of ice cream and cradled his face. “I’m not seeing or sleeping with anyone else. Believe me, you’re all the boy toy I can keep up with.”
He smiled tightly.
“What? Did that upset you?” She stroked down his deliciously taut six-pack until she cradled the weight of him in her hand. “Isn’t sex all men think about?”
“All I think about is that damn trial—except when I’m with you.” He went harder in her hand.
She stroked him, circling her fist down and up again. “Then let me help you really forget.”
A flash of relief shot through her that she could lose herself in this, in being with Caleb, in exploring all the fantasies and sensuality that had been denied to her in her previous relationships. Here, with Caleb, finally she was in control of her pleasure.
And his.
Angling over him, she took him in her mouth. Groaning, he sagged back onto the rug as she worked him with her tongue and her hand. As hard as he was, he should be finished well before those twenty-five minutes were up. Even now, his whole body went rigid.
Abruptly, he grabbed her by the waist and hefted her away. “Someone’s outside.”
A car engine grew louder, pulling into the driveway. She jumped up quickly and ran to peek through the dining room curtains she’d pulled closed in preparation for naked time with Caleb. Outside in the horseshoe driveway, Nanny sat in the passenger seat of a strange car with a man around her age. They were talking, which bought a few more minutes.
Madison turned on her heels to him again.
“Damn it. Sophie’s grandmother is back.” She grabbed Caleb’s clothes off the floor and sofa and everywhere else they’d fallen as she and Caleb had flung them. She pitched his pants to him, then yanked on her sports bra and leggings. “Get dressed, fast.”
He pulled on his jeans, slowly, watching her with heated eyes. “So your brother finds out I was here. What’s the problem with that? Maybe it’s time.”
Was he crazy? Once they started meeting families, having dinners together at a table full of relatives with curious eyes, poorly veiled expectations, everything would change. She would lose control again, become that weak, needy woman dreaming about damned picket-fence promises—and that was unacceptable.
“When we started this, we agreed to a no-strings affair. You didn’t want complications during the trial, and I’ve had enough failed relationships, thank you very much.” She willed her voice not to shake over how much those past betrayals had hurt. Every man she’d ever loved cheated on her. Her self-esteem could only take so many hits, damn it. “I’m here for you during a tough time in your life. I’m your distraction from a freaking big problem, but that’s it, Caleb.”
He stayed silent so long she feared he would win the point by default once the front door opened. Finally, he shoved his feet into his deck shoes, no socks. His beautiful green eyes with the crazy-long lashes went chilly. But that was better than fake promises and vows that never lasted.
“Fair enough.” Fastening his fly over his erection, he winced. “Do you see my shirt?”
She scooped up his concert T-shirt from a black marble abstract cat. Pressing the wadded cotton to his chest, she lingered for an instant to savor the rigid muscles. “I do value what we have here. Escapes from reality are special.”
“Right. Whatever.” He shoved his arms through his T-shirt and yanked it over his head in a tight fit.
The band logo stretched across his chest and she didn’t even recognize the name. Her forty-two years suddenly felt ancient. Her hand went to her throat, over the hint of wrinkles starting under her chin.
She followed Caleb to the back entrance off the kitchen so he could slip down the side stairs undetected. At the last second, she twisted her fist in his T-shirt right over an image of a skeletal guitar and yanked him in for a kiss. “I’ll see you soon. Really.”<
br />
He left without a word, and damn it, she hated the squeeze to her heart. Turning, she padded barefoot back to the dining room and monitored the driveway. Nanny was still in the car, chatting with her friend and only a mere flash off to the side gave any hint of Caleb leaving. The distant rumble of his motorcycle provided the final reassurance he’d made a clean getaway.
She sagged into the armless chair at the table and shifted uncomfortably. How could a padded chair be so hard? She thumbed away a smudge on the glass top on the coffee table and tried not to compare her life to her brother’s.
Tough to do with all his paperwork splayed in front of her. He and Sophie tackled their save-the-world jobs while juggling family demands. She lived off alimony from a man who’d never cared about her in the first place. He hadn’t even bothered to argue about the divorce or spousal support. He’d told her he wouldn’t miss the money any more than he would miss her. After all, he had a twenty-three-year-old, knocked-up showgirl for a wife now.
Madison slumped back. She spent her days picking out marble statues and reinventing the Kama Sutra with her boy toy.
She thumbed a stack of papers, schedules, and charts alongside a legal pad with notes…
Out in the open.
For anyone in this house to see.
Even Caleb.
Her skin went icy as a horrible possibility whispered insidiously to life. Her affair with Caleb had started after the trial. He’d said he wanted to go public, but he’d never argued overlong when she insisted on keeping it private. Her eyes went back to all that information about the trial spread out in front of her.
Could Caleb have been tempted to look at Sophie’s notes? Had he been alone long enough to sift through?
And an even more insidious thought whispered through her mind. Could he have started this whole relationship to get an inside look at trial information her brother might have? It seemed crazy. David was on his side, after all. But she also knew David would never lie for Caleb. If something bad came up, he would reveal it to the prosecution…
Every other man she’d slept with had lied to her, used her. She’d thought Caleb was different, that she was in control this time. Now, she wasn’t so sure.
* * *
Sophie strolled beside David as he finished the last of a smoked turkey leg. Content to lag behind the children, she watched Brice and Haley Rose sprint ahead to the log ride. Safely in sight, while giving her a breather.
Heat from the asphalt radiated up, warming her calves. The breeze mingled scents of sticky tar and sweat. The faceless crowd pressed around them. She and David walked side by side in an easy silence that offered a different kind of intimacy, no less compelling than the conversations they’d shared alone. Coming here with him hadn’t provided the emotional distance she’d expected, only expanded the ways she felt drawn to him.
Connected.
She twined around a couple pushing a baby stroller and closed back in beside David. His longer strides kept a slower pace to accommodate her shorter steps. Her arms swung by her sides, her hands empty and lonely.
He gripped her elbow to guide her as a teen on Rollerblades sped past. The warmth of his fingers lingered long after he dropped his hand away. This evening spent with David and the children had been everything she could have wanted and feared.
Too perfect.
How simple it would be to slide an arm around his waist, tuck her hand in his back pocket. Too easy.
Sophie looked away and stared up through the webbing of steel bonding the Ferris wheel. Her life seemed just as convoluted as the workings of the carnival ride.
David tossed his trash into a metal can. “Do you want to ride? We can make the kids get on, too.”
“I don’t do carnival rides.”
His eyebrows lifted in surprise. “You’re afraid?”
“Hey, I was top of my class in survival training,” she answered defensively. “I wear the uniform. I’ve pulled my time in a war zone overseas. I would rather not add any extra risks to my life, thank you very much.”
“Isn’t life all one big chance? We control what we can.”
Pulling her gaze away from the ride, she shivered. Her husband had said much the same thing too many times to count. “It doesn’t have to be all about the thrill of cheating death.”
His jaw clenched, his skin pulling tauter across his prominent cheekbones. “I don’t do my job for some sick adrenaline rush.”
“I know that. But it’s still such a part of who you are, being a part of the test world, taking just as many risks here as you do over there.” Her throat closed, and she swallowed. “Even on a simple day like today, you’re on alert. You keep your back to a wall most of the time. You scan the crowd as if looking for trouble.”
“Not looking for trouble. Watching out for it.” No humor shone in his eyes. “There’s a difference.”
Her father hadn’t sought danger as Lowell had, but the end result had been the same. She didn’t see the need to tell David, since it would only spoil the night. “Just forget about it. I’m being argumentative. Chalk it up to the lawyer side of me taking over, but I’ve got that reined back in again. Let’s not ruin a really wonderful evening.”
Nothing left to say, she turned away from the Ferris wheel and looked back at the log ride where the kids were piling into one of the cars. While the children set off on their ride, Sophie struggled to think of some benign topic for conversation to reclaim the ease they’d felt minutes earlier.
David cleared his throat. “Are we back to juvenile arm punching to avoid admitting how much we want each other?”
His words stunned her silent—for a second.
“I think that constitutes a major break in the unwritten rule to keep things light.”
“By all means, keep me straight on the rules. That’s your job.”
Damn. There she went again, taking out her stress on him, fighting to cover up how much she wanted to jump his bones. He didn’t deserve her anger after all he’d done for her family.
She tapped a gentle punch against his arm, her fist comically small and unthreatening despite her kick-ass training. “Sorry for picking a fight. We’re not sitting in some war room with me spouting the laws of armed conflict from the Geneva convention. Although I have to think things would be simpler between us if we had a rule book.”
Sophie unfurled her fingers and trailed a path down to his wrist. The feel of him grew more familiar with each touch. She lost track of how long they stood there, just staring at each other.
David linked his hand with hers. “I’m not going to make any move you don’t want.”
“What I want and what’s smart don’t always match.”
He stepped closer. “Then I guess we’re in the same boat.”
Her body flamed to life, aching to explore the feel of skin-on-skin contact with him. Would he bring that intensity and generosity into the bedroom? Into making love?
“Hey, Mom, David!” Brice shouted, racing toward them. “That was fun. Can we go again? And how about you get on the log ride with us this time? Please. Don’t be a chicken.”
Each child grabbed a parent’s hand and tugged them to the towering wooden structure, water sluicing over the sides.
“Dad, come on!”
“Hurry before the line gets longer.”
Sophie allowed her son to lead her, needing a breather from David. His shadow lengthened on the pavement ahead of her, bobbing and merging with hers. How easy it would be to blend hers with his. But then wouldn’t she lose her own defining shape?
She’d been so sure on the dock earlier that she was ready to embrace life again. To stop being afraid.
The challenge was here—not just some amusement-park ride—but the real thing. She could have an affair with David that might even turn into more if she dared.
And right now, she felt like she could dare just about anything.
EIGHT
Bang!
David watched Sophie down tin duck aft
er duck, impressed as hell. She’d been damn near on fire since she’d surprised them all by climbing into the log ride.
Although there wasn’t much more he could do than watch, since she was so competent with the gun, she definitely didn’t need instruction from him. So here he stood, burning with the urge to step up behind her, wrap his arms around her, and enjoy her bottom wriggled up tight against him.
“Yes.” She pumped her fist as she won—again.
Her smile, her grit, reached out to him and his eyes held hers, about as much as they could risk out here with the kids around. But he wanted more from her, and he was sensing a green light from her.
The more he thought about it, the more it made sense. They could pursue this attraction without letting the kids know what was going on. Everyone would be safe.
And safety on all levels had to be his primary concern.
He’d worked every angle he could today, placing calls, then stuck waiting around for answers while he whacked golf balls and tortured himself with more tempting family time.
The mechanic’s report had been inconclusive. It appeared the accident had been caused by a blowout. There hadn’t been any foreign bodies puncturing the tire. His best guess had been low air. Which even though Sophie said she kept her car maintained, low air could happen at any time.
Or someone could make it happen and leave no trail leading back to the person responsible.
Frustration fired through him. A call to the new commander asking him to pull strings and get some extra manpower looking into all these accidents hadn’t netted him jack shit in the way of help. Since their previous commander, Colonel Rex Scanlon, had transferred, the unit had been, for all intents and purposes, rudderless. Each test ran on its own, with no cohesive leader. David hadn’t been able to decide if the new commander was spineless, lazy, or just so terrified of having anything going wrong on his watch that he did nothing.
Caleb had become distant as well. The enthusiasm that had made the young captain such an asset to the dark ops test world had been squashed. Even if he beat this rap, chances were Caleb would be so tentative in the cockpit he wouldn’t be effective.
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