Saint sagged a little as he realised the real reason he didn’t want to take her home.
He didn’t want to let her go.
He didn’t want this, whatever it was, to end even when he knew it would.
The cougars would come for her.
“What happened with the other bear?” she murmured and he sensed the trickle of fear in her.
“You don’t have to worry about him. He’s gone,” Saint growled, his need to protect her rising to the fore again. “We’re alone now.”
She stared at him in silence.
Did she feel as aware of him as he did of her?
He moved to face her and resisted the urge to place his hand on her knee, aware that she would slap it away if he dared to touch her. Resolve flowed through him, roused by his need to protect her, and he hoped she would see it in his eyes as he gazed into hers.
“I swear, Holly… even if Knox wasn’t gone, you don’t need to be afraid.”
He gripped his knees to stop himself from touching her as her face softened, as a tiny flare of warmth lit her eyes.
He growled low.
“I will never let anyone hurt you.”
Chapter 9
Holly was doing her best not to be distracted, but Saint wasn’t making it easy. She had been giving him the silent treatment, unintentionally at first when she hadn’t been sure what to say in response to his growled vow to keep her safe.
A promise that had ignited heat in her veins and roused her cougar instincts, made her want to growl herself for some unnerving and unknown reason.
She had lost herself in trying to figure out what was wrong with her, why she kept reacting to Saint in ways she had never acted around others, and had been silent so long that the thought of speaking made her uncomfortable. There was too much pressure on her now, as if whatever she said would have to be incredible or inspiring given how long she had been silent.
Her gaze tracked him against her orders and she fell into drinking her fill of him. She was sure everything he was doing; it was done on purpose. He was trying to get her to look at him.
So far, he had removed his shirt and washed up in the sink, drying himself off with a small towel as he had been looking at her. His smile had been a little too satisfied when she hadn’t been able to drag her eyes away from his chest, so she had flashed him her middle finger.
In response to that, he had dampened his hair, had grabbed a mirror and some scissors, and had taken to cutting his hair and trimming his beard.
Holly stared at the fire, trying to come up with a plan to escape and failing dismally as her focus drifted back to the mountain of a man just a few feet from her. He was humming a tune now.
“You want a drink?” His deep baritone rolled over her and through her, heating her blood.
“No.” She made the mistake of looking at him.
That heat became an inferno and she cursed him for trimming his beard down to a short layer of scruff and taming his wild brown hair.
He was too handsome.
It was a little disarming.
Actually, it wasn’t just a little disarming. She had been fighting softening towards him and now he had made it harder than ever to hold on to her anger. He was transforming before her eyes, becoming so different to the male who had snatched her.
Holly clenched her fists in her lap.
He had snatched her.
She was his captive.
That was enough to have her heart hardening again, to have her walls coming back up. He could be handsome all he wanted, could smile and be kind to her, but it didn’t change the fact he had kidnapped her to hurt her friends and that he showed no sign of releasing her.
“I want to go home,” she snapped, her mood taking a dark turn. Good. She clung to that anger, used it as a shield against him as he frowned at her, his rich brown eyes gaining something akin to hurt, as if the thought of letting her go pained him.
“No.” He looked over his shoulder at the kitchen window. “You really want to go out there?”
She glanced at the window and lingered. The storm was worse now. Snow constantly rushed past the window, almost horizontal as the wind caught it. That wind whipped around and hit the glass, rattling it.
Fine. Maybe she didn’t want to go out into the freezing blizzard.
As soon as it died down, she was making a break for it though.
“Fucking snow,” Saint grumbled, deep hatred in his tone, as if he held it personally responsible for all that was wrong in the world.
“You don’t like the snow?” She looked at the window and then at him, caught the black look on his face before he turned his back to her and stared out of the window too, his hands braced against the counter in front of him.
“Do I sound like I like it?”
“No.” She twisted on the couch, angling herself towards him, curiosity gripping her. Was it a bear thing? Cougars weren’t bothered by the winter, not as the bears clearly were. She didn’t feel the call of the wild as Saint did, had no instinct to sleep through the colder months. “I was born in winter. I always liked the snow when I was younger, but not so much these days.”
He frowned over his shoulder at her and came to face her, planted his backside against the counter and folded his arms across his very bare chest. Would it kill him to put his shirt back on now that he was done with the manscaping?
“Why don’t you like it now?” His dark eyes searched hers.
She cursed herself for getting so comfortable around him, didn’t want to answer his question but could see in his eyes he wouldn’t let this one go. He wanted to know why she had changed her opinion of snow.
She sighed. “My family are a handful and always tease me at this time of year, making my life hell. This is the first time I’ve managed to escape them for the holidays, and look at what happens. I get myself kidnapped. They’ll never let me leave again.”
He was quick to avert his gaze, his mouth flattening as he turned his profile to her as if that would change what he had done. He pushed off and came to her, and rather than feeling tense that he was near her, she found herself wanting him to sit with her, to tell her more about himself.
He didn’t.
He sank to his knees in front of the fire and tended to it. Holly studied his profile and the feelings her senses could detect in him, reading him like an open book. He felt guilty about his actions, yet he wouldn’t let her go.
Why?
She doubted it was because of the storm and that he didn’t want her freezing out there or getting lost.
Silence fell again as he stoked the fire, as the warm light of it danced across his rough but handsome features, attempting to soften the harsh planes of his face as he glared at it.
When that silence became too comfortable again, she searched for something to say.
He didn’t take his eyes off the fire as he spoke. “Are you so young that you’re not allowed to be away from your family? I’m not sure how cougars work. Are they like other shifters?”
Heat that had nothing to do with the fire scalded her cheeks as she realised he was trying to ask about her age and whether she had matured, was considered an adult now. Most feline shifter species reached maturity at around a century old when biological urges like desire and need awakened.
Together with the ability to breed.
She really didn’t want to answer that question, but as she stared at the fire, avoiding his gaze now as he looked at her, it struck her that he had a point.
She was old enough to go her own way.
To do as she pleased.
She shifted her gaze to meet his, stared into his dark eyes and had the feeling that what she wanted to do was something dangerous.
Something wicked.
His deep brown eyes warmed, gained a shimmer of gold as he looked at her, his pupils slowly dilating. Firelight flickered across the broad expanse of his bare chest, tempting her to trace his hard muscles with her fingers, to know the feel of a male’s body
at last.
Apparently, she wasn’t dysfunctional after all because whenever she looked at Saint, the urges she had thought she didn’t possess roared to life, almost overwhelming her.
She pressed the back of her hand to her overheating cheek and stood, struggled to breathe as she muttered, “The fire is a bit hot.”
His gaze tracked her as she moved away from him, towards the far end of the room, fanning herself with her hand as her heart raced.
And her cougar side growled, pacing restlessly, flooding her with a startling urge to turn that snarl on him, to walk right up to him where he knelt on the floor and stand over him, take hold of his jaw and keep his eyes on hers. Holly recognised that urge for what it was—a display of dominance.
Her hands shook, as unsteady as her breathing as that hunger rattled her.
“Holly?” Saint eased onto his feet in a sexy, fluid move that spoke of strength, had his muscles rippling in a symphony that came dangerously close to ripping a feral, possessive growl from her.
She was quick to shake her head, fanned herself more furiously. “I’m fine. Just… stay over there.”
Because she wasn’t sure what she would do if he came any closer to her.
Pouncing on him seemed the most likely outcome.
She breathed through the cacophony of instincts that were intent on ripping her apart, had her unsure of herself, made her feel as if she was looking at a different person. Not chaste, sweet Holly, who felt nothing when a male looked at her, couldn’t even muster the desire to kiss one.
No. This Holly was far removed from that one. This Holly wanted to pounce on Saint and claw him, wanted to dominate him and make him submit to her, revelled and found pleasure in the thought of him doing just that.
“You don’t look well.” Concern shone in his dark eyes as she glanced at him.
“I just need some air.” She looked around her, desperately seeking somewhere she could get that air. “Why do you have so few windows?”
She hurried to the kitchen, couldn’t stop her feet from moving as she stared at the window there, as her temperature hit boiling point and she feared she was going to pass out if she didn’t cool down soon.
She was panicking.
“Holly.” Saint strode to the door, and she thought he meant to block it, that he would stop her from opening it and getting the air she needed, air that felt vital, the only way of stopping herself from passing out.
She growled at him and bared fangs.
He arched an eyebrow as he opened the door at the same time as she threatened him.
Shame flooded her cheeks with even more heat and she lowered her head as she scurried past him, relief crashing over her at the first cold kiss of the wind on her face. Saint caught her arm when she tried to step out onto the snowy deck, holding her back. She shivered at the firmness of his grip on her, at the strength she could feel in it together with a silent declaration that he wasn’t going to let her go.
That did more to calm her racing heart and cool her burning blood than the air that swept snow against her.
Her temperature quickly took a nosedive back to normal, the strange urges that had seized control of her falling away as Saint held on to her arm, as she grew aware of him standing just inches behind her, his gaze on the back of her head.
“Better?” he rumbled.
She nodded, breathed slowly as she focused on him. Couldn’t stop herself from speaking and filling the silence. “Cougars are like other shifters. I matured at just over a century old, but I still live with my family… for now. Ember has only just left her family and I want to do the same. I want to see more of the world.”
Gods, it felt good to admit that out loud to someone, and to herself.
She really did want that.
He slowly tugged on her arm, pulling her around to face him. His dark brown eyes searched hers. “How much of the world do you have left to experience?”
He was good at that—asking probing and very personal questions without saying them directly.
He wanted to know how much experience she had with males, and that was one question she wasn’t going to answer. She searched for a way to shift the course of their conversation.
Saint released her and rubbed the back of his neck, his expression grim as he grumbled, “I made you uncomfortable again. How about I apologise with a drink? I might have some hot chocolate.”
Holly smiled, relieved she didn’t have to evade his question, and tempted by the fact he had offered her favourite drink.
“That sounds nice.” She pulled a face as an urge hit her, roused by the thought of sipping hot chocolate. “Maybe come back to it. I have a more pressing need than a warm drink.”
He frowned. “What’s wrong?”
She glanced around his cabin and cold washed over her as she realised something. There was only one large room and the loft. Only a single door in the entire cabin and she was stood next to it. Her eyes darted back to him.
“Where’s the bathroom?”
Saint hiked his thumb over his shoulder, towards the back of the cabin. “About sixty feet that way.”
Holly squeezed her thighs together and stared at the snowstorm as wind howled past the cabin.
She re-evaluated his home.
Rustic was too good a word for it.
She stared at Saint in horror, aware of how she was about to give away that she had no intention of escaping him while the storm was raging but unable to muster even a shred of concern.
“You can’t seriously expect me to go out there?”
Chapter 10
Saint would have found the horrified look on Holly’s beautiful face amusing had it not been for the awareness that beat in his veins, warning him that she found his home wanting, that it wasn’t good enough for her. He braced himself, but was sure it would do nothing to deflect the anger he was about to feel.
Or was that hurt?
She cast another wide-eyed glance around her, checking every inch of his cabin, and then threw him another shocked look. “You’re not kidding. You don’t even have an indoor toilet!”
And there it was.
His pride took a direct hit and he growled at her, bared short fangs as she looked ready to launch another salvo at him. Her lips compressed and he sensed the fight in her, how fiercely she had to battle herself to stop herself from uttering another insult.
So his home was a little more basic than what they had at Cougar Creek. Who cared?
He turned his cheek to her as it hit him that she did. She cared.
And for some godsdamned reason that made him care too.
“The cabin is old,” he grumbled, anger towards her swift to morph into anger towards himself. He didn’t need to explain why his cabin lacked one of the most basic of facilities. He didn’t have to explain anything to her.
Wasn’t as if he wanted her approval after all.
“I can’t pee out there in the freezing cold!” She tossed another disgruntled look at the open door, at the white-washed world beyond it.
Saint opened the cupboard to his left, close to the stairs, and pulled out a chamber pot. He regretted it the moment he offered it to her, as her wide eyes leaped between him and it, going back and forth so many times he was sure she was going to make herself dizzy.
“Good gods, no.” She turned her nose up at it, and then some of her bravado slipped as she cast a glance at the outside world and her voice dropped to a hushed murmur. “I’ll go outside because I’m not having you standing over me.”
Saint shoved the pot back in the cupboard and kicked the door closed. “You’ll have me standing over you either way. I’m not letting you out of my sight.”
She glared at him, fire igniting in her eyes, bringing out the green. “Not a chance. I’m not peeing with you anywhere near me.”
“It’s the chamber pot or a sixty-foot trek through the snow. Be thankful Lowe cleared a path to the outhouse. Only other option is crouching in three feet of snow…” He looked out
at the grey morning, at the snow whipping past the cabin. “Might be more by now. Might not even have a path to follow to the outhouse.”
She pressed her thighs harder together, and he couldn’t believe how seriously she was debating this, or how big a problem it was for her. All she had to do was cop a squat on the chamber pot or brave the weather. She was acting as if he was asking her to scale Mount Everest to reach a toilet.
“Sooner or later, Holly, you’re going to have to go. You’re not going to have a choice in the matter either. You really have so much pride that you would rather wet yourself?”
Her eyes widened again and she looked ready to hit him as a blush burned her cheeks.
She turned her profile to him and folded her arms across her chest, pulling her purple coat tight across her shoulders.
“Fine.” She huffed and slid him a sideways glance. “Is there at least toilet paper in the outhouse?”
He frowned at her and went for his shirt, plucking it off the back of the couch. “We’re not that uncivilised. Plenty of paper for your delicate parts.”
He stilled with his arm halfway into his left sleeve and looked at her, suddenly aware of her again, of those feminine curves she hid beneath thick layers of protective clothing. Her gaze scalded his chest, heat back in it that said he wasn’t the only one whose thoughts were rolling down dangerous routes.
Wicked routes.
When she looked ready to bolt out into the storm to escape him, he quickly pulled his shirt on and buttoned it, and closed the distance between them again. He reached over her, every fibre of him aware of how close she was to him, how she didn’t move to distance herself, just stood there and let him be near her. He breathed deep as he grabbed his coat, savouring her scent of sweet berries, his mouth watering at the thought of dropping his head and tasting her lips.
He hadn’t been born yesterday, knew that her complaint about the fire being too hot had been a flimsy excuse to cover what had really been happening to her. She wanted him. She wanted him with the same ferocity as he wanted her, only it frightened her.
Stolen by her Bear (Black Ridge Bears Shifter Romance Series Book 1) Page 8
