by Erin M. Leaf
EVERNIGHT PUBLISHING ®
www.evernightpublishing.com
Copyright© 2018 Erin M. Leaf
ISBN: 978-1-77339-684-2
Cover Artist: Jay Aheer
Editor: Karyn White
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
WARNING: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. No part of this book may be used or reproduced electronically or in print without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews.
This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, and places are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
DEDICATION
For T
QUEEN WOLF
Triad Mates, 1
Erin M. Leaf
Copyright © 2018
Chapter One
Avery Tate tossed the lit match on top of the porn magazines and smiled as the pile caught fire with a huge whoosh, just like she’d hoped. The cheating bastard’s shit could burn all day long, for all she cared. She took a swig of his whiskey and then dumped the rest of the bottle onto the bonfire with grim satisfaction.
“I see I got here just in time,” Paige said, stepping out of the forest stark naked.
Avery gave her best friend an indifferent glance, then jerked her head toward her cabin’s porch. “I left a pair of your jeans and a t-shirt on the railing for you.”
Paige lifted an eyebrow, but walked up and dressed. “I told you to wait for me.”
Avery shrugged. “I haven’t been feeling particularly patient, lately.” Understatement of the year, she thought to herself, but didn’t say anything more out loud. Deep inside her soul, her wolf paced, and she grimaced, wishing she could let her beast out, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t shift. She was defective in so many ways. She looked down at her generous hips and breasts and pressed her lips together. Complaining about her weight or her lack of ability to change into her wolf wouldn’t change anything.
Paige sighed, then walked down and tugged on Avery’s sweater sleeve. “Come on and sit away from the volcano you’ve created before a stray ember sets your hair on fire.”
“Not likely,” Avery said, but she let her friend tug her to the porch steps anyway. She wished she had more of her ex’s stuff to burn, but he’d collected all his clothes last week. And deep inside, she knew she really wouldn’t burn any of his real stuff. She was too much of a coward for that. She always worried too much about what other people thought, probably because she’d spent all of her life feeling inadequate in comparison to the rest of the wolves in the pack. “He left this shit here just to irritate me.” Avery sat on the top step and glared at the fire. “And I mean, who even owns hardcopy porn these day, anyway? Why didn’t he just look at this crap online like everyone else?”
“Brian is an asshole not worth your time,” Paige said, putting an arm around Avery’s shoulders. “Have you tried going for a good, hard run? That always makes me feel better.”
Avery scowled. “You know that doesn’t work for me. I’ve tried running, and it’s great for a half mile, and then I feel like my wolf is trying to crawl out of my body. It’s awful. I don’t know what’s going on with me lately.” Inside her soul, her wolf paced back and forth, but the bitch wouldn’t settle. Story of my life, Avery thought, frustrated. She’d never been able to shift, even though she’d been part of Boulder Pack since her birth. She was one of those unfortunate anomalies: a werewolf who couldn’t shift. She felt like a wolf. She knew what her wolf should look like, but shifting seemed beyond her.
“I don’t know either,” Paige said, leaning her head on Avery’s shoulder. “Did you talk to any of the older pack members?”
“They don’t know anything.” Avery grimaced as she remembered how that particular conversation had gone. “Old Dame Bridget said I needed to have a litter of puppies and stop complaining. I’ve finally realized that woman hates me for some reason, but she likes my father, so I thought she’d be helpful. Ha. Not even close.” She snorted. “Anyway, no one would dare breed with me, the mutant who can’t shift. She was being deliberately insulting. I want to have children, not puppies. I don’t know what the hell her problem is.”
“Mitch’s grandma always did have a sharp mouth. She doesn’t like me either, and don’t mention her to my mother or all hell breaks loose. You know they’ve been rivals for ages,” Paige said, shaking her head. “I think she’s probably joking, but seriously? She said that, like, right after you dumped your jerkoff ex? Talk about insensitive. You told her he cheated on you?”
“Yes, seriously. I told her he cheated. And yes, she really said that, the old bitch.” Avery sighed and rubbed her eyes. She felt like shit, and didn’t see any change in that particular status anytime soon. “I don’t know where she thinks I’m going to get the sperm to start making babies, but she seemed to think that would solve everything.” She rolled her eyes. “I’d say she misses Mitch, but she was awful even before he left, if I’m remembering correctly.”
“He’s been gone for over a decade. Bridget should be used to his absence,” Paige said, then shrugged. “You know he didn’t get along with her, right? He spent all of his time growing up hanging out at our house with my brother, Fletcher. I don’t know why you even bothered asking her for advice.”
“My father, of course. He pushed me into talking to her, and I caved, rather than have yet another fight with him,” Avery said. “It doesn’t surprise me that Mitch ditched her, though. I can’t imagine growing up with her as my grandmother. She’s always glaring and complaining about something. Poor guy.” She remembered Mitch Addison’s blue eyes and dark hair, and that he seemed nice. I was only ten at the time, and still dealing with Mom dying. It’s no surprise I can’t remember much more. He and Fletcher hadn’t visited often, and the last few times they’d come home she had been away at college.
“Well, Bridget won’t be missing him much longer. He and my brother are actually headed home,” Paige said, smiling.
Mitch and Fletcher are coming home? Avery flashed on a memory of the time when Paige’s brother helped bandage her knee after she’d fallen from a swing. She remembered him looking up at her, eyes golden and bright with energy she’d been too young to understand, but now she knew that his wolf had been staring out at her. She shivered. He was ten years older than she was, and she remembered that he’d left on his travels shortly after the incident. Mitch had gone with him. They only came home for the holidays and lately not even then. She frowned. She’d liked her friend’s brother and his best friend, even as a child. Fletcher was definitely an Alpha, and he tended to scare people, but not her, for some reason. Mitch was quieter, and she remembered his intense stare. He was going to make an excellent Beta. Everyone knew that the two men were poised to take over the leadership of the pack.
Well, Paige’s dad is getting older, and I know her mom wants to do some traveling. Maybe they’re going to take over sooner rather than later. “Your mom must be happy. If they stay home, she’ll get to do the traveling she always wanted.”
“Oh, she is,” Paige grinned. “Speaking of my mom, what about her? Did you talk to her?”
Avery nodded. “Of course I asked her. She’s been like a second mom to me.”
“And? What did she say?”
Avery looked at her friend. “You know I love your mom, right?”
Paige leaned back. “Oh no. What did she say?”
“It was what she didn’t say.” Avery well remembered the speculative look Ann Lyall had given her after she’d explained her latest issues with her wolf side, and how she couldn’t stand to have her boyfriend touch her anymore. Brian hadn’t been any great prize, she knew that now, but her avers
ion to intimacy and other kinds of touch had been going on for months. It had to have something to do with her problems shifting. She picked up a twig and flicked it into the fire.
“I don’t know what she said, but she’s not just my mother, she’s the Alpha’s wife. She’s the one who’s supposed to help with this stuff.” Paige frowned. “You told her that the asshole called you a cold prude, right?”
“No, I did not tell her that. Are you crazy?” Avery said standing up. She started pacing. “I’m not talking to your mother about my sex life, Paige.” She stopped and glared at the ground. “Or rather, my total lack of a sex life. Ugh. I don’t even want to think about talking to anyone about that.” She ran a hand over her face, embarrassed and frustrated. God, she was tired. “I told her about my wolf freaking out, and how I couldn’t stand to be touched anymore. These are the times I really miss my mom. Maybe she’d be able to help. She didn’t get along with Bridget, either, now that I think about it.” She picked up another twig and broke it into three pieces, then threw it into the flames. She watched it turn to ash.
“You don’t seem to mind it when I touch you,” Paige said after a moment.
Avery gave her friend a disgusted look. “We’ve been best friends since before we could walk. You’re the closest thing I have to a sister, so I certainly hope I don’t start having this problem with you.” She smiled briefly. “You helped me when my mom died. You kept the bullies at school from picking on me when all I did was cry all through eighth grade.”
Paige smiled back, but Avery could tell she was worried. “If you ask me, I think you’re having pack dominance issues,” she said, not for the first time.
Avery made a face. “I know you think that, but it makes no sense. I’m a woman. Only males can be leaders in the pack. That’s simple biology. And I can’t even shift. I’m a mutant.”
“You’re not a mutant,” Paige said, then picked at the hem of her old t-shirt. “And that part about females not being leaders, well, that’s not precisely true.”
What is she getting at? Avery mused, eyeing her best friend. “Your father’s an Alpha. Your uncle is his Beta, and that’s how it works. All the rest of us are just pack members. Even your mom isn’t dominant, and she’s married to the Alpha.” Avery glanced at her friend. “And yes, I know he listens to her, but it’s only a courtesy. He makes the actual decisions.” She shook her head. “No. I’m just feeling cranky because my so-called boyfriend was a cheating asshole.” She watched the last magazine crumple into ash, and figured she probably should kick some dirt over the remaining coals so her front yard didn’t go up in flames. “Come here and help me put this out.”
Paige stood up and walked over to the fire. “You know your voice has that weird resonant thing going on sometimes. You have the vocal power of an Alpha.”
Avery glanced at her. “You’re delusional.” She kicked dirt over the last of the smoldering paper. “Help me,” she growled, annoyed all over again. She didn’t want to talk about what could be. She had to stop wishing she could shift, and be skinny, and be someone she wasn’t.
“I am helping you.” Paige grabbed the sturdy stick Avery used to poke at her fires and started stabbing at the remaining coals with it. “I have no choice but to help you.” She raked some dirt over the glowing embers.
“What? No. That’s absurd.” Avery crouched down and scooped sand from the edges of her fire pit over the mess. “You would’ve helped me anyway, even if I hadn’t said anything. I didn’t compel you. I’m not a witch.”
“Avery, I had to come here and help you. Your voice had that same tone my dad uses,” Paige said.
Avery shook her head. “Impossible.”
Paige shrugged. “You don’t have to believe me. You’ll see when you tell some other pack member to do something, and they fall all over themselves to obey you.”
Avery stood back up and stared at her friend. “I’m not an Alpha, Paige. I’m not even a wolf, not really.”
“You are a wolf.” Her friend tossed the stick back down on the hearth stones. “And you certainly aren’t ordinary.”
Avery huffed. “Well, that’s something we can both agree on.”
Paige laughed, and hugged Avery again. “Don’t worry about that jerk. He’s gone for good. I saw him throwing his shit into his car outside that shack he rents from my uncle. He’s leaving the pack.” She paused. “By the way, I saw him and your dad talking the other day outside the Sanctuary. It was weird. I didn’t think they really knew each other. I’m glad he’s leaving.”
Brian was talking to my father? What the hell? And he’s leaving for good? Avery rubbed her eyes. “I did tell him to get lost, but I didn’t expect him to go to such extremes. Not that I mind. It’ll be nice not to have to see his face around the pack’s territory. And I had no idea that he and my father knew each other. My dad told me he didn’t think I should be involved with anyone, which is completely stupid. Ugh, what a mess,” Avery said, running a hand through her hair. She could feel the beginnings of a headache creeping over her skull. “You know, Brian said I was fat.”
“Fat? As if. You’re not fat.” Paige headed for the cabin. “You’re curvy.”
“Same thing.” Avery followed her inside, wiping her dirty hands on her cutoff jeans shorts. “I have too much junk in the trunk, as they say.” She gestured to her chest. “And in the attic.”
“Oh please. You do not. You could probably outrun me, outjump me, and outlift me and all the other women in the pack. You’re strong. Not fat.”
“I can’t outrun you, and you know it, because I can only run as a human. And I’ve never lifted weights in my life.” Avery washed her hands and then pulled out the remains of yesterday’s cold pizza. “I’ll give you strong, though, but it’s just genetics. Shifter stuff. At least I have that.”
Paige snorted. “Genetics my ass. You’re strong, and all the guys are afraid of you. As far as I’m concerned, that’s a good thing.” She opened the pizza box and grabbed a slice as she sat down at Avery’s tiny kitchen table.
“Brian wasn’t afraid to cheat on me,” Avery said, staring at the box. The day she’d come home and found him banging some random bitch from the neighboring pack on her sofa was a day he’d regret for the rest of his life. She smiled grimly. “He won’t be cheating on anyone again, though. I made sure of that. If I catch even a whiff of him being that much of an asshole to some other poor female, I’ll hunt him down and make him regret it.” She glanced at the living room, currently missing a sofa. The next thing she’d done after throwing Brian out was haul the damned thing to the curb and have her trash hauler take it away. “I need a new sofa, now, too. Ugh.”
“You realize it took him over a week to heal that cut on his leg,” Paige said, taking a huge bite out of her pizza. “He bitched about you trying to cut his balls off the whole time.” She didn’t sound the least bit disturbed by Brian’s situation.
“He’s a liar.” Avery rolled her eyes. “The idiot tripped over his own damn self and fell when I caught him boning his floozie in my living room. The girl started screaming when she saw me. I don’t know what she thought I was going to do to them. It’s not like I’m built for brawling. He knocked over my antique lamp and the glass shade broke, and that’s why he has a cut on his leg. If he’d just shifted immediately, it wouldn’t have taken so long to heal. I’m still mad about the lamp. It was my favorite, and now it’s broken.” She sat down at the table and finally took a slice of pizza. She was starving. She hadn’t been eating right lately—another weird symptom of her restlessness.
“I think your reaction to his cheating is why you might have a problem denying that you’re a dominant wolf, Avery. You’re out here burning his porn,” Paige said dryly. “You’re confusing being hurt and angry with the other stuff.”
“Any woman would’ve been pissed if they’d walked in on their supposed boyfriend screwing another woman on her couch. Why didn’t he just do it at his own place?” To say Avery hadn’t enjoyed w
alking in on him was an understatement.
“Because he’s dumb?” Paige offered. “He has to be dumb to cheat on you.”
Avery shrugged. She didn’t really want to talk about her ex anymore.
“You going to work tomorrow?” Paige asked, getting the hint. She went to the fridge. “Ooo, lemonade!” She grabbed the pitcher and detoured to the kitchen cabinet above the sink for glasses.
Avery sighed. “Of course I’m going to work. Where else would I go?”
Paige lifted a shoulder. “I wasn’t sure. You took this past week off, so…” She trailed off as she poured them both some lemonade. “We missed you. I had to handle the Girl Scout troops all by myself. It’s not the same without you to help with the guided hikes.”
“I took that week off long before Brian decided to insert his dick into the wrong hole,” Avery reminded her.
Paige chuckled. “You have such a way with words.”
“Besides, you handled the hikes and the two outdoor education sessions just fine by yourself, from what I heard.” Avery took a bite of her pizza, then washed it down with lemonade.
“I don’t have a degree in environmental science, so I missed having you there. I couldn’t answer the questions like you can,” Paige said, running a finger down her glass. “And Uncle Marcus said Aunt Lillian was going crazy with the gift shop.”
“I’m sorry I took you away from your hours there,” Avery said, feeling bad. “I really needed that week, though.” She glanced outside. Her cabin was set back from the main road on a couple acres of the Boulder Mountain Nature Sanctuary. The Boulder Pack had lived on this mountain in central Pennsylvania for hundreds of years, and it was home. She couldn’t imagine how hard it must have been for Mitch and Fletcher to be away and traveling for the better part of fifteen years, but it was customary for the Alpha’s heir to spend time learning with other packs across the world.
