That same night I bedded five women and hadn’t stopped fucking my way through the town. Thereafter I focused on Kingston and everything was right in the world until Mia.
She was a breath of fresh air with her green eyes, dark hair and voluptuous body. Her attitude and sense of style tilted my world around. I had no idea when I started falling in love with her. It could have been the first day I opened the door and she devoured me with her gaze or it could’ve been that day outside the bathroom, hell it may even have been the day she told Allison off.
But I love her.
There was pain in her eyes. So much pain, I wanted to find a sword and slay those dragons for her. I wanted to make all her nightmares disappear. I wanted to be hers.
I had it and I threw it away all because of my pride and my inability to get over Carolyn and her betrayal. I drove to the park and sat on the bench under a huge oak tree. It was a rare day of sunshine and it shone through the branches and leaves making patterns on the grass.
I looked up at the blue sky and prayed. I prayed I could see her one more time. Just to apologise, to beg and to tell her how much I love her. I needed her more than my next breath. I needed to tell her how much she meant to me. I needed to remind her of all those times we spent together. I had to remind her of how good we were together.
I shook my head and looked down.
There she was. My Mia, walking towards me with a frown on her face and hesitance in her steps, her body encased in tight jeans and an old t-shirt of mine. I had never seen her more beautiful in my life.
“What are you doing here?” she asked in a soft voice.
I closed my eyes and let the tears I held back, fall. I gasped when I felt the soft pads of her thumbs brush away the tears. I opened my eyes to stare into her wet green ones.
“I guess I need to turn in my man card for all this emotional stuff, huh?” I laughed.
Mia shook her head. “No, but, Aiden… what are you doing here?”
I told her then about Carolyn and why I doubted her. Mia listened in silence next to me, occasionally rubbing my hands or entwining her fingers with mine—it was something she did when she had no idea what else to do with herself.
“I saw the photos and my first thought wasn’t about looking for the fakeness in them, it was like Carolyn all over again,” I sighed. “If I could do it all over, I would.”
“I know,” Mia said. “Now that I know what you went through before, I can understand why you reacted like that.”
Mia drew in a small breath and then blew it out. “I grew up in a broken home. My sisters came and went as they please and my parents were forever fighting. We moved from house to house, never really staying in one place for too long.”
I watched as she gazed out, unseeing.
“My mom and I were finally happy together. She got this job and was earning enough money, my dad and she were civil over the phone and he would visit whenever he could. It was the happiest year ever. I think I was the only kid in the world who preferred her parents apart than together.
“But then he whispered promises in her ear. Promises of us being a family again and going back to the town we were finally away from. My mom gave in and we were back in the old town this time with my sisters in tow. They treated mom and dad like crap. They went out partying and one of my sisters was a little dramatic about wanting to be with her boyfriend.
After a while both my sisters got married and moved out. By then I was twelve and things were a little okay. I say a little because one of my sisters lived across us. So the tension between the families was extraordinary.”
Mia paused and then looked at me.
“I was just finished with primary school when I saw my dad’s side of the closet empty and all his things gone. I had no idea what happened. My mom was crying non-stop and wouldn’t tell me anything. I figured since they always fought maybe they fought again and he took some time off or something. I started highschool and it was scary.
The worst part was every day when I got home I would see my mom passed out or trying to do things to herself. It was only after some girl came up to me and apologised for my dad having an affair and leaving us for another family—that I figured out what my mom was really trying to do.”
“What was that?” I asked, amazed at her strong composed face.
“She was continuously trying to kill herself. Sometimes it was an overdose, another would be trying to slit her wrists and then there was her trying to burn herself. She kept telling people that I would be better off without her and that she didn’t want to live if my dad wasn’t there. Once she almost succeeded and I remember watching the paramedics pronounce her dead. It dawned on me that she didn’t want me.”
I felt my heart break for Mia. She was my sunshine, she wasn’t supposed to be given this amount of pain.
“She stopped after that, said that she wouldn’t try killing herself anymore but instead she found solace in something else—alcohol. She drank every day, drank until those bottles were empty. Then my life started changing. It started with small things like harsh words or falling asleep on the couch. Then it became slaps and beatings. I had learned to pretend to sleep, although sometimes that wouldn’t matter, she’d just drag me out of bed to deliver her anger and pass out again.”
“Where was your dad through all of this?” I asked angered that a man would let this happen to his daughter.
“He was living his life with his new family. Whenever I called, his woman would answer the call and make sexual sounds,” Mia winced.
“What?” I exploded. “He let you listen to that?”
“He probably thought it was my mother calling but I was the one to hear it. Anyway, there were times when things got unbearable at home. I called him and he would tell me to go to my friend’s house or go to my sister. He would never try to make things right, hell he would never even call the next day to find out if I was okay. I finally left for a while to stay with my gran and then my mom followed and then she and I moved together again. She started drinking again and things got worse. Even at twenty-one my mom felt she had the right to beat me and treat me like a ragdoll. So I left and here we are.”
I stared at Mia in amazement. She went through all this and still managed to get up and live. I knew one thing that even if she didn’t take me back the one thing I would always have for her was respect. An immense amount of respect.
“There were times when I wanted to end it all. I became a cutter, every time my mother would hurt me I would look for a blade and inflict enough pain so that the emotions would just go away. I was lucky I had a lot of pride, if it were not for that pride then I would be dead by now,” Mia looked at me with tears in her eyes.
“I’ve been used like a puppet all my life, Aiden, by my parents, my sisters, my friends and even guys. I can’t be with someone that’s going to drop me as soon as something is said or things get rough.”
I got down on my knees and held both of her hands in mine and stared into the green depth of her eyes. “I made a mistake, Mia, one that I will not repeat. I will love you and cherish you in a way that would make all the bad things seem like distant memories. I will be the protective man that needed when you were twelve, I will be that caring shoulder when you need to cry and most importantly? I will be your salve for the broken pieces of your heart. I will be worthy of you, Mia.”
Chapter Sixteen
Those people who say that talking about things helps you let go? They’re right. Telling Aiden everything was the best decision of my life. I felt lighter as each word left my mouth. I looked down at him, on his knees promising to be there for me, to be worthy of me. I shook my head and laid my palm flat against his cheek.
“Don’t treat me like some fierce warrior,” I smiled sadly. “I never said a word, Aiden, I didn’t leave when I could have.”
“You didn’t leave because you had hope, Mia,” Aiden said. “You believed in your mom even when nobody else wanted to.”
I closed my eyes
. “Things were not always bad though. When mom was sober she was this angel with a big heart and a beautiful smile. I lived for those moments, I prayed for them.”
“Have you ever tried telling them all this?” Aiden asked as he sat next to me.
I shrugged. “Not my dad, but I did try talking to my mom.”
“And?’
I sighed. “My mom is emotional. Anything can set her off and I always worry about being the one to lead her to the bottle. So, sometimes I start to tell her things and notice her face and decide—I’d rather not.”
“So you’ve completely forsaken all relationships because of what happened with your parents?”
I glanced at Aiden and saw the obvious concern and love in his gaze. He wanted to know about me not for any other selfish reason; but I think he wanted to understand me.
“I wouldn’t say it is their fault. I tried my best to have relationships but the guys were always losers as I told you. Someone always found a way to disappoint me. Maybe it was just the town I came from or maybe there was something wrong with me, but,” I paused and then looked into his bright blue eyes that reeled me in that very first day. “Looking at you; I’m thinking that maybe it was the town.”
Aiden smiled and pressed a light kiss to my forehead. “You are very special, Mia. Ironic as it sounds; you lit up my life with your darkness.”
I chuckled. “Such a way with words, handsome.”
Aiden grinned at me.
“There was this guy, Raymond, he lived up the road from me. We chatted over the phone for a while. I liked him because he paid so much attention to me. He made me feel like I was wanted. He used to listen to me when I would tell him about all my problems,” I laughed. “I used to purposely do things to mess up my computer and call him over to fix it. All so I could see him.”
Aiden chuckled. “What happened?”
I paused. “I really don’t know. I guess I didn’t want to ruin our friendship or something. At one point I had convinced myself I was in love with him. He was a good guy.”
“Ever wonder what would’ve happened?”
“Yep, while it may have been good; it could have also turned into a complete disaster and I would’ve lost him forever,” I shrugged. “Besides, my knight in shining armour happened to be a guy from a bar in Michigan with one smoking hot body and a habit of jumping to conclusions.”
“Hmmm, lucky you.”
We sat in a few minutes of silence watching a family set up a picnic blanket and basket, three toddlers in varying ages ran around the couple while the father played with a baby strapped in a baby harness. I watched the family and for the first time instead of wishing I had that with my own parents—I wished that those parents had been Aiden and me, and the children running around could be ours.
For the first time I picture a family with someone, a life, a new beginning.
“So what happens now?” Aiden broke the silence.
I looked at him and smiled. “Now, you help me move things out of the shitty apartment I’ve been staying in and move it back into your house.”
Aiden saluted me. “Yes madam.”
***
The reunion with everyone was bittersweet. The girls at Kingston pretended to be upset and then burst into tears, Dianna was most upset because I hadn’t even told her where I was going. I knew she would crack under Aiden’s pressure and probably blurt out my whereabouts. Mr. and Mrs. Kingston welcomed me with open arms. Allison came to me one day…
I sat on Aiden’s bed dressed in his t-shirt and going through his highschool yearbook. He really looked weird with the braces and acne, I couldn’t believe that this guy was now my hunky boyfriend.
“It’s impossible to think he’s the same guy,” Allison said from the doorway.
I glanced at her and looked back down without saying a word. I could hear her sigh and step further into the room; she sat at the edge of the bed and wrung her fingers in her lap.
“Mia, I’m so sorry,” her voice trembled. “I didn’t mean to—okay, that’s a lie, I did mean to do all the things I did.”
I raised my brows. “Well, no can fault you for hiding the truth, oh wait, I can.”
“I felt you were after my brother just like Carolyn. I’ve been so protective off him and what I did to you with the help of Haley was wrong.”
I nodded at her. “It was.”
“I had no idea what she was going to do. All I knew was that she would help me get rid of you from our lives. I hated how nice you were, I hated how my parents fawned over you, I hated that you were taking my brother’s attention, and mostly? I just hated how perfect you were,” Allison shrugged.
I laughed. “Perfect? I’ve never been perfect and neither have I ever claimed to be.”
We lapsed into silence both of us looking at everything else besides each other.
“Allison, what you did was wrong. But I can’t hold it against you forever. Aiden means the world to me. I love him and I hope that one day he and I can start a family of our own. For that to happen I will notdistance him from his sister,” I watched Allison look up at me with hope. “I forgive you Allison. I hope in time we can become friends too.”
“I would like that,” Allison smiled sweetly. “Okay, I’m gonna head to bed. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” I called out.
I smiled to myself as I put the yearbook back on the shelf. I felt two hands slip around my waist, lips at the shell of my ear, pressing slightly and retreating, and the heat of the body of the man I loved.
“That was nice of you,” Aiden whispered. “Giving Allison a chance.”
I gasped as he trailed his lips down the side of my neck, sucking at the skin slightly.
“Yeah, well, I’m a nice person,” I breathed.
“I agree.”
Aiden back me onto the bed slipping me out of his shirt as we went, it was only then that I noticed he was completely naked. He worshipped every inch of my body with his lips, tongue and fingers. He played my body as if it were an instrument. I did the same for him and when the passion reached unbearable levels; he sunk into me, filling me to the hilt.
He moved slow, holding my hands flat on the bed entwining our fingers and looking straight into my eyes, pouring all his love into his gaze and kisses. We reached an earth-shattering climax that set one thing in stone; we were going to be together for as long as life allowed us to.
Much, much later I woke up to the sound of Aiden in the shower. I crept inside, hoping to surprise him but I was surprised instead—running down the length of his spine was a long gothic looking rose and along the stem the words, Forever My Mia, were inked permanently onto his skin. Tears slipped from my eyes as I watched the water run down the red, green and black ink. He loved me so much.
Epilogue
Life seemed to settle in place—this time it was for real. Allison and I managed to become really close. Aiden helped me start my own business which was basically a bookstore that connected to Kingston. I didn’t name it because—well, I had plans on being a Kingston soon enough so why change the name now only to change it later. Dianna finally got engaged to some hunky businessman whom she claims spanks her like Christian Grey. Lucas got himself a boyfriend who spends most of the time sitting at the bar with him. Abigail hated it because she had her eye on the guy and then found out that he humoured her only for Lucas’ sake. Haley tried to butt in again and again but finally I sent the photographs to the cops and soon Haley was no longer a problem. She was sent out of Michigan just like Carolyn was but not by Aiden this time; instead it was by her rich parents.
My mom moved to Michigan to be with me. Aiden didn’t mind surprisingly, he was a little hostile to her at the beginning because of the past but once he saw that she was constantly sober and putting her life back together, we managed to accept her into our lives. My dad sends a text now and then; mostly I think he’s happy that my mom and I are out of his hair and over thousands of miles away from him.
Aiden proposed in
a rather unforgettable way. We were at Kingston and Aiden continuously tried to pop the question but this random guy kept interrupting him asking for me for his order. My handsome man finally got pissed enough that he punched the guy and then got on his knees and said, “Marry me.”
So much for asking.
The wedding happened in Michigan. The ceremony was small but memorable none-the-less. Mom looked radiant and dad was dapper as usual. I had a feeling they had secretly hooked up while he was here, but I wasn’t holding my breath fir that.
Aiden and I flew to Paris for our honeymoon and it was amazing.
“So how does it feel to be Mrs. Kingston?” Aiden asked when we set out bags inside the hotel room.
I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pushed him down onto the bed. I took my time relieving him off his clothes while he did the same for me. When we were naked, I rode him until our bodies coated with sweat and skin stuck together as we lay tangled on the silk sheets of our honeymoon suite.
“It feels euphoric,” I gasped into the silence.
Aiden chuckled and held me tighter to his body. We spent one week in Paris, another in London and another in Rome. It was amazing and I knew I was finally living my dream. I was happy.
On my twenty-fourth birthday I learned I was pregnant. Aiden was over the moon but I was scared. My old fears reared its ugly head, reminding me of my childhood and the way I was brought up. Aiden, Emily and Carter were worried because my depression was affecting the pregnancy. I knew I needed to deal with things before it jeopardised my family or even my baby.
So I started seeing a psychiatrist. She helped me with my fears and asked me to journal everything that bothered me every day. It worked, I was able to join in the excitement when we bought baby stuff and even helped Aiden paint the nursery.
My mom had a blast helping to buy things for the baby and we bonded.
The sad part was that every time I was with her, I continuously expected the other shoe to drop. I always expected her to disappoint me in some way. That was how I realised that I wasn’t really over everything that happened. I wasn’t going to move on unless I got my closure.
Worthy of Me Page 9
