Lucy got out the tea caddy. “You’ve never written?”
“Oh yes. I never heard from him.”
“Fanny, you have not gotten over Andy.”
Fanny turned to face her. “You’re thinking of Rolf, and I admit I was trying to see if I could care for another man the way I did Andy. I tried. Really, I did. My heart is taken. I must face the fact it always might be.”
“What about Rolf?”
Fanny frowned and put down the cup in her hand. “I saw him with another woman the other day. He kissed her. I don’t believe he will ever settle down with one woman.”
“I’m sorry if he hurt you.”
Fanny waved her hand. “When I realized I really didn’t care, I knew I was wasting my time and his. Not that he cared.” She shrugged. “I overheard something though, Lucy. I’m glad we’re alone. I heard him talking to a man. He said he was going to search the Stanton homestead. I assumed that meant your cabin. What could he be searching for?”
Lucy’s stomach plunged. “I haven’t trusted him from the first time we met. Thank you for telling me. I’ll let Nate know we need to be careful.” She picked up the tray. “We’d better get back. Your mother will be looking for us.”
THE TASTE OF dirt clung to Jed’s tongue. His muscles were getting used to riding after spending so much time in the saddle. Was he taller? He glanced at his new brother. Maybe someday Jed would be able to do everything Nate could.
“Circle around that way.” Nate pointed toward the north where a stand of trees split the milling cattle in two. “I saw several strays trying to get across the river. And hurry. There’s a storm coming.”
Jed nodded and guided his horse toward the trees. His new hat fit just right, and his own rope hung from the saddle horn. He was a real cowboy. He urged his horse into a trot. “Yeehaw!”
The steer nearest him lifted a lazy head and stared at Jed as if to question his right to make him move. The beast’s tail swished and he swung his horns at the horse, then lumbered past the stand of trees toward the river. Jed managed to get the small group of strays over to the main herd. He sat back in the saddle and glanced around to make sure he hadn’t missed any.
Nothing moved but the grass. His stomach grumbled when Nate joined him.
Nate grinned. “I heard that. Good job, Jed. You’re a natural.”
Jed sat taller. “Thanks.”
Thunder rumbled overhead. Nate glanced at the sky and frowned. “Looks like a real bad one.”
Jed stared at the black, churning clouds. Lightning flickered before the thunder came again. It was going to take half an hour to get home. Good thing he’d brought an oilcloth slicker.
The lightning bolt seemed to come from nowhere. It arced across the sky, followed by the loudest thunder he’d ever heard. The horse reared at the sound, and Jed wasn’t expecting it. He found himself flat on his back and spitting sand out of his mouth.
Nate dismounted and grabbed Jed’s hand. “You okay?”
Jed let Nate haul him up. “Yeah.” The ground rumbled under his feet. “That’s some thunder.”
Nate glanced around, then grabbed Jed’s hand. “That’s not thunder. Run!”
Jed leaped toward the trees with Nate, though he had no idea why he was running. If there was lightning, weren’t you supposed to stay away from trees? It wasn’t until he glanced over his shoulder that he saw wild-eyed cattle pelting headlong toward them. The sight galvanized him into a faster run, and he reached the first tree in seconds.
“Climb!” Nate grabbed him by the waist and hoisted him into the air.
Jed scrambled to the first limb, then kept on climbing to allow Nate room. Nate leaped up to the limb but lost his grip and fell onto the ground.
Jed’s eyes widened. “Jump, Nate!”
His new brother was going to die. Jed closed his eyes. He couldn’t watch.
Jed clung to the limb with all his might as everything in his world shook. In a moment he was back in Wabash with the rain driving down and his father beside him. The carriage careened and he yelled. With his eyes closed, he could almost remember what happened that night. He held his breath as the familiar fear swamped him. No matter how hard it was, he wanted to remember now.
“Jed? You okay?”
He opened his eyes. Nate was staring up at him with concern in his face. He’d made it to safety. The cattle were past the trees, and the tree no longer shook.
He hadn’t been able to help Nate, and he’d failed his father in some way too. Though he couldn’t remember the details, he couldn’t miss the shame. He swallowed and nodded. “Yes, I’m fine. It’s over?”
“We’re safe.”
But Jed didn’t feel safe. He wouldn’t feel safe until he remembered what had terrified him so that night.
NATE’S MUSCLES ACHED from the day’s work as he sat at the dinner table. He and Jed had branded calves all day. The light scent Lucy wore wafted around Nate as she put the plate of food down in front of him. She smelled much more tantalizing than the salt pork and potatoes she’d prepared. A curl had escaped the roll on the back of her head, and he had to resist the impulse to twist it around his finger.
He looked down at the plate. “Smells good.”
“Percy told me it was your favorite meal.”
“It is.” He waited until she was seated, then bowed his head. “Lord, thank you for keeping us safe today. May this food give us strength to do your work and carry out your will. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
“Amen,” Eileen echoed in her sweet voice.
When he raised his head, Lucy’s blue eyes were staring at him. “What?”
“Were you in danger today?” she asked.
“It was really cool,” Jed burst in. His gaze dropped to his plate when Nate shot him a glare. “Sorry. I wasn’t supposed to tell, was I?”
“No, you were not.” Nate pressed his lips together. Lucy was going to be upset all evening now. “We’re both fine.”
She sat back in the chair and folded her arms across her chest. “What happened?” When neither he nor Jed said anything, she stared at her brother. “Jed, what happened today?”
The boy shoved food into his mouth and chewed. His panicked glance slid to Nate. Lucy’s lips flattened and her finely shaped brows drew together.
“All right,” Nate said. “There was a bit of a cattle stampede. We were caught in the middle.”
“We had to climb a tree,” Jed said eagerly. “We were just lucky it was there. It was the only one big enough to hold us both. The cattle thundered by right under us.”
Lucy went white. “You could have been killed. Both of you.”
“But we weren’t,” Nate pointed out. “God took care of us like he always does. No need to fret, honey.” The word was out before he realized it, and her expression softened. He reached over and grasped her hand. The skin was soft under his calluses.
“It upsets me so much,” she burst out. “Both of you out there facing all kinds of danger when I can’t even see.”
“What would happen if you could see us? You can’t keep us safe by willing it. God will do as he sees best. Nothing we can do about that.”
She looked down at her plate. “I could pray.”
“You can do that anyway,” Nate said.
“It’s not the same.”
“Life happens, Lucy. Good and bad, they come to all of us sooner or later. We can’t will away the bad things. They are part of what shapes us into the people we become.”
“You sound like your cousin Mrs. Walker. She preached the same thing in town on Monday.”
He grinned. “That’s a compliment.” He watched her take a few dainty bites. This woman he’d married was so mysterious to him. He still didn’t know what she wanted for herself from this marriage. Security for her siblings had driven her here, but did she have any goals of her own other than a family? What did she think of him? He wanted to know all those things.
“How about you and I go for a ride after we eat?”
>
“A ride?”
Nate nodded. “I’d like to show you the river by moonlight. It’s only about half an hour away. Tonight is a midsummer full moon. We can watch it come up.”
“But what about the children?”
“Jed can take care of Eileen. They can play checkers.”
“I like checkers,” Eileen said.
“You go ahead.” Jed leaned back in his chair. “Me and Eileen can even do the dishes.”
“As you wish,” Lucy said.
They finished dinner and Nate got out his Bible. “I think we were in Proverbs.”
“Proverbs 18,” Jed said. “Can I read tonight?”
In answer, Nate slid the big Bible across the table to the boy. It warmed him that Jed had taken so much to this time together. Even little Eileen seemed to pay attention as she sat on Lucy’s lap. He listened as the lad began to read the verses.
“‘A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.’”
As the verse sank in, Nate’s thoughts jumped to Drew Larson. Though he wasn’t a brother in the official sense, Nate thought he was a Christian. The rancor between the families had grown and made the barriers higher and higher. But that wasn’t his fault. Was it?
Jed continued to read. “‘Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.’”
Nate’s glance slid to Lucy. Her chin rested on Eileen’s head. She’d brought him nothing but blessings. In his heart he thanked God for the wife he’d been given. And he’d tell her how thankful he was tonight at the Red River.
TWENTY-THREE
Lucy stood on the bank of the Red River and watched the reddish water move past. Bees hummed in the grass, and the moist scent of riverbed and moss permeated the air.
Nate stood nearby. “Not too close. It’s slippery at the edge.”
She lifted her face to the breeze so she didn’t have to look at the intensity in his face. Had he brought her out here for an uncomfortable discussion? The sun was beginning to set, and the sky was turning orange and violet. She willed herself to accept whatever he had to say.
Curling her fingers into her palms, she turned to face him and found him standing even closer than she thought. Her nose was nearly touching the button on his shirt. “Just say it.”
“Say what?”
“Whatever you brought me out here to say. Something is on your mind.”
His fingers gripped her shoulders. One hand moved from her shoulder to her chin, and he tilted her face up toward his. “Listening to Jed read Proverbs tonight made me realize that though I kicked against it at first, God gave me a great blessing in you and the children. I’m finding myself quite content with having a wife around. Jed has been a big help, and I love Eileen.”
Jed had been helpful. Lucy wished she could have done as much to assist her husband as her brother. “I’ll try to do better. How can I help with the ranch?”
He cupped her cheek as he smiled. “I rather like coming home to a hot meal and having clean clothes without having to think about it. You’re doing a fine job.”
His words warmed her nearly as much as his touch. Almost. “You brought me out here to tell me that?”
“I wanted to spend some time with you. We’ve talked about the coins and whoever broke into the ranch house. We’ve discussed raising Jed to be a man, but I don’t know what you want out of life other than a family. If we’re going to spend the next fifty years together, we’d better start getting to know one another. What kind of house do you want me to build you? What’s your favorite color so I can buy you a dress? What convenience can I buy to make your work easier?”
Fifty years together. Her mouth went dry at the thought. She hadn’t allowed herself to think much beyond each day as the sun rose. What did she want? Children of her own. Her cheeks warmed. A husband whose gaze went soft when he looked at her. Friends and family around.
“Well?” he prompted, putting his arm around her.
How could she possibly say such intimate things to him? He would think her quite forward. “I like being part of your family. I want to be part of the town, to help others. I don’t need things to be happy. And I quite like our little cottage.”
“There has to be more than that. What do you want for you, Lucy? Not for other people but for you.”
He still embraced her, and Lucy could feel the warmth of his hand through her dress. His other hand was still on her cheek and he rubbed his thumb across her lips in a most distracting way. “I don’t know.”
“You just don’t want to tell me.” He dropped his arms back to his sides. “I’d hoped you would.”
The disappointment in his voice stung her. “What do you want, Nate?”
“To build a great cattle empire here in the Red River Valley. To be such a man of integrity that my children will be impacted after I’m dead and gone. I thought you’d mention children, Lucy, since you mentioned them before. Don’t you want a houseful?”
“Yes, I would love children.” She wetted her lips.
“I reckon we’re going to have to change our living arrangements for that to happen.”
There was laughter in his voice, and she swallowed the answering bubble of mirth in her throat. “I know.” She was determined not to crack a smile. She wasn’t ready.
He folded his arms across his chest. “But not yet.”
She shook her head. “Not yet.”
He took her arm and turned her to face the rising moon. “There’s our midsummer moon. The next moon will be a blue moon.”
“The moon will turn blue? I’ve never seen such a thing.” He was standing so close she felt him shake his head above her, and she dared to lean back against him. “Of course, I’ve lived in a town all my life where I didn’t notice the moon and stars.”
“It’s called a blue moon because it happens infrequently. It’s the third moon in a quarter when there are four full moons in a season.”
What was the point of bringing her out here to see the moon? It was large and full as it rose in the fading light. “It’s beautiful.”
He turned her to face him again. “It is and so are you, Lucy. I want you to be my wife in every way, but I have a feeling it’s going to take awhile for that to happen.”
At the question in his voice, she nodded. “Not yet,” she whispered.
“I figured if we talked about it, you could get used to the idea.”
She glanced up at the moon. “Next month is the blue moon?” When he nodded, she swallowed. “Then let’s talk about it again then, okay? I think I’ll be ready then.”
He smiled. “My little planner. Everything neat and in order. You ever want to cut loose and do something spontaneous?” He pressed his lips against her forehead and trailed kisses down her face to her mouth.
She drank in his kiss. Spontaneous might be good if she could get used to it. Was it too much to expect to want sweet words of love? He liked her. That much was clear. But what would it take for him to love her? She pulled away and looked into his face. She felt something for him, but she wasn’t going to his bed without love on his part and hers. Not even in a blue moon.
LUCY YAWNED. DAWN had barely pinked the sky. She’d awakened early, and her first thoughts had been of Nate’s words last night. She’d gotten up, determined to do more to be the kind of wife he needed. She gingerly touched the cow with one hand and wrinkled her nose at the odor of cow and manure. Positioning the bucket under the cow, she grabbed the udder and squeezed. Nothing. She huffed and got a firmer grip. This couldn’t be that hard. She’d already watched Nate do it for months. If he could do it, she could. Maybe if she sang to the animal . . .
She cleared her voice and thought of the words to that song Nate sang when he milked. She raised her voice in melody.
“‘I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair. Borne, like a vapor, on the summer air.’”
She felt stupid singing a love song to a cow. But Bessie seem
ed to like it. The cow snorted, then swished her tail, and a drop of milk squirted the next time Lucy squeezed. Heartened, she leaned her head against the cow and tried to get a rhythm going. Squirt, squirt. Ping, ping. She smiled. She was getting it!
Then Nate’s deep baritone chimed in with her soprano.
“I long for Jeannie with the day dawn smile. Radiant in gladness, warm with winning guile.’”
His gray eyes were smiling as he pulled up a stool beside hers. Did he love her? She was beginning to think he felt something, even as this feeling grew in her own heart. Was it love? She hoped so. She wanted to love her husband. But she’d had so little experience with men. Maybe it was merely physical attraction. Whatever it was, she wanted to nurture it.
“I reckon you’re getting the hang of this,” Nate said. “Almost half a bucket.”
“You usually get over a bucket.”
“I didn’t at the beginning. Once those fingers get stronger, you’ll be great at it.”
Her fingers did ache. She flexed them. “You want to finish? Bessie might appreciate being totally emptied.” She scooted over to make room for him. His broad shoulder grazed hers, and she could smell the clean scent of the soap he’d used to wash. She wanted to lean against him and have him gather her in his arms.
The weather had turned hot. Even this early she was too warm. She and Nate were alone, a state that came so seldom she felt tongue-tied.
“I thought we’d go check on Pa today after supper,” Nate said. “We haven’t been over for two days. That okay with you?”
“Of course. I made some pies yesterday. I’ll take one to him.”
“He’ll enjoy that. All he’s done lately is eat, Percy says. I think Percy is getting tired of cooking for him.”
“I wonder if we should take dinner to him for a few days to give Percy a break. I could go over early to cook.” She almost hated the thought of leaving her little cabin. It had quickly become home. “You and Jed could join us after you’re done with chores.”
“I bet Pa would enjoy the different food.” Nate rose and took the bucket of frothy milk. Lucy followed him, and they crossed the yard to the house. She’d opened the windows to take advantage of what wind there was, and the new yellow gingham curtains blew in the breeze.
Blue Moon Promise Page 18
