by M. D. Massey
As he turned back around, he saw that a homeless man had appeared out of nowhere directly in front of him. Where’d he come from? Colin thought. I could swear he wasn’t there a second ago.
Time seemed to slow as Colin and his bike bore down on the old man, and he yanked the handle bars while leaning hard to avoid hitting him. As if he were watching a movie in slow motion, he saw every detail of the scene flash before him as he swerved to avoid hitting the old man.
“Hang on to that bat, kid!” the old homeless guy yelled, as Colin flew past him. Strangely, the man didn’t even flinch as Colin narrowly missed hitting him, despite the fact that 600 pounds of motorcycle and rider almost mowed him down.
Guy must be on drugs, Colin thought. Why didn’t he jump out of the way?
Time sped up once again as he swerved off the road and up onto the sidewalk, where his front wheel lodged into Mrs. O’Malley’s white picket fence.
As the wheel hit the fence, the bike stopped moving but Colin didn’t. The momentum catapulted him into the air, over the fence, through Mrs. O’Malley’s bushes on the other side of the fence, and straight at the strangest-looking little person Colin had ever seen.
2
Time slowed again as Colin flew through the air toward the small, strange-looking man. Wow, he thought, taking in his surroundings while airborne at 30 miles an hour, I feel like I’m in The Matrix. Knowing he had to land sometime, and that landing wouldn’t be all that pleasant, Colin decided to enjoy the moment by taking in the details of his unintended target.
The little man Colin was about to flatten wore a rather smart green waistcoat over a crisp white dress shirt, along with a black derby, brown tweed trousers, black calfskin gloves, and a pair of highly-polished black dress shoes. And while he obviously took great care with the quality of his wardrobe, to Colin the man looked very strange.
As Colin calmly noted the small man’s clothes, something else stood out to him that was very peculiar. Even stranger than what the man wore was what he had in his hands. It was a large grey rock with unfamiliar symbols chiseled into it, and those symbols glowed faintly as the little man turned it over and over in his hands.
The last thing Colin thought while he flew through the air at breakneck speed was to wish that he’d eaten a proper breakfast, because this was turning out to be a really crappy day and a good breakfast always cheered him up. Upon the completion of that thought, Colin’s flight abruptly ended when his helmeted head smashed into the rock in the strange little man’s hands.
Colin opened his eyes and found himself staring at the gray sky through a canopy of brown and yellow leaves, when just moments before they’d been lush and green. His head hurt like the dickens, but taking a personal inventory, he appeared to be all in one piece. He removed his now cracked and ruined helmet, thankful that the worst injury he’d received from the collision was a relatively minor headache.
Colin sat up as the little man dusted himself off several feet away. “Well, you’ve gone and mucked that up—yes you have, old Brogan. Oh, yes indeed,” the little man muttered to himself, brushing leaves and twigs from his pants and waistcoat.
“Hey, mister, are you alright?” Colin asked, with genuine concern in his voice.
The little man turned toward Colin and jumped, and his eyes grew big as saucers. He made fists of his little hands and rubbed his eyes, then placed his fists on his hips and frowned.
“Oh, now, isn’t this just a lovely little mess old Brogan’s gotten into. You can see me, lad, and without an adder stone to boot? Oh, I’m ruined for sure! Now, where did me Blarney stone go?” He patted his pockets as if the large stone could have fallen into one during the crash.
Colin rubbed his head and winced. “Look, I don’t know anything about any stones, except for the one you were carrying. Here, let me help you find it.”
Colin crawled around on his hands and knees, searching the hedges for the rock. He finally located it a few feet away. As he grasped the stone, the symbols flared brightly and he felt a small shock where his hands made contact. Momentarily, his vision sharpened and his head cleared; the effect was a lot like downing five cups of espresso. Colin knew this, because he and Jesse had done that recently, after her dad bought a new espresso machine.
Wondering if he’d damaged the rock in the crash, Colin handled it with care as he passed it back to man who called himself Brogan. “Here you go, mister—but be careful, because that thing just shocked me.”
The little man took the stone from Colin, and a grim look crossed his strange little face. “Oh, you’re quite the helper, aren’t you now? Thanks, me boy.”
He stared at Colin for a moment, tapping his foot and looking at him as if he was deciding something of no small import. Then, he muttered something unintelligible and continued speaking as if he’d never paused.
“Well, then, I’ll just be getting back to what I was doing, before you so rudely interrupted me.” With a tip of his hat, he hurried off through a gap in the bushes, muttering to himself about calamities and catastrophes all the way.
Colin followed him out of the hedgerow by crawling as near to the ground as he could to avoid getting scratched. When he exited the hedge, it was as if his whole world had changed from one moment to the next.
For starters, his motorcycle was nowhere to be found. Instead of his bike, there sat a crummy old 50 cc scooter with chipped paint, bald tires, and a severely bent front rim. Colin was furious that someone had taken his motorcycle and left him with this piece of junk, but he decided that he didn’t have time to worry about it. He’d just find Officer Haney later and file a report on the stolen motorbike.
He still needed a ride to the game, so he reached for his new phone to call his mom. But in the place of his brand new smart phone he instead found a regular old crummy flip phone, which incidentally looked as though it had taken some damage in the crash. Okay, this is getting weird, he thought.
Thankfully, whoever had stolen his motorcycle had left his bat behind. Colin walked over to retrieve it and noticed they’d left his bungee cord, too, and had used it to tie the bat to the scooter. This is really freaking me out, he thought to himself. What the heck is going on here?
After retrieving his bat, he stood and finally got a good look at his surroundings; downtown Farmersville appeared to have undergone a radical transformation. Where before there had been neatly trimmed bushes and hedges, sparkling glass storefronts, spotless sidewalks and streets, manicured lawns, and brightly painted homes, now there was a town that looked like a war zone. Broken-down cars were parked at random next to and at times over the curbs, trash was strewn everywhere, windows were smashed in homes and storefronts, grass, trees, and bushes were brown and unkempt, weeds poked up through cracks in the sidewalks, and the overall appearance was of a town that had been long neglected and disused.
Much as the little man had done just a few minutes before, Colin rubbed his eyes with his fists. When he opened them again, the mess remained. What the heck happened to my town? he thought. Confused and a little frightened, he plopped down in the dry brown grass while his mind frantically sought a reasonable explanation for the sudden change in his surroundings.
As he contemplated recent events, Colin began chewing his thumbnail in earnest. He knew it was a childish habit, but it always seemed to help him think more clearly. As a kid he’d been teased relentlessly about it, so these days he’d replaced the habit with chewing his thumbnail since it drew less negative attention. He still got called “thumbsucker” on occasion, though.
“Maybe I was out for a lot longer than I thought,” he mumbled around his thumb. No, that didn’t make sense; at least, not any more sense than what his eyes were already telling him. Could he have injured his head in the crash? Colin thought it was possible, but he’d never heard of a concussion having such side effects. When kids got hit in the head in baseball, usually they just complained of blurry vision and headaches.
No, there had to be another explanation f
or it… and he had a sneaking suspicion the strange little man with the rock would know what was going on. Looking around to see where he had gone, he noticed his friends and neighbors going about their business in an almost zombie-like fashion.
There was Mr. Morris who ran the pharmacy, sweeping his front walk with a broomstick that had no bristles. Across the street, he could see Dean the barber through the window of his shop, going through the motions of cutting imaginary hair on Mr. O’Malley’s bald head, and with no scissors or clippers in his hands besides. And there went Jesse’s dad, driving an old beat up station wagon that appeared to be on its last leg. But hadn’t she said they’d just gotten a new car? It was all very confusing, and Colin somehow knew he’d never get any answers unless he found that leprechaun…
Leprechaun? Now where had that idea come from? Everyone knew there were no such things as leprechauns; but with the way this day was turning out, it wouldn’t surprise him to find out they were real after all. He scanned his surroundings, turning in a slow circle until he saw a flash of green heading down the alley behind the barber shop.
Colin’s hands clutched his lucky bat tightly as he sped off after the bizarre little man. He was determined to catch up with him, and when he did, he would have some answers.
3
Skidding around the corner as his sneakers lost traction in a puddle of motor oil, Colin used the bat like a ski pole to stay on his feet. He caught a glimpse of the little man rounding the corner ahead, and as he righted himself he put on speed to catch up. At first it seemed there’d be little challenge in catching Brogan, considering how much longer Colin’s legs were; however, the speed of his prey surprised and baffled him. It seemed that at every turn that Brogan was always just ahead of him, but far enough away that Colin never seemed to get any closer to catching him.
As Colin turned the next corner, he saw a small gloved hand disappearing under a manhole cover a few yards ahead. Skidding to a stop at the manhole, he was relieved to see that it had been left ajar—whether by mistake, or because Brogan expected to be coming back that way shortly, he wasn’t sure. But it looked suspiciously like a trap to Colin, and he decided that rather than chasing the man down into the sewers, he’d hide until he came out again. He ducked behind some boxes and settled in to wait.
Within minutes, his patience was rewarded by the grinding of metal on metal. Ever so carefully, Colin peered over the box he hid behind and saw the little man crawling out of the manhole. Without a second thought, Colin jumped over the box to pounce on the leprechaun, pinning Brogan underneath him and placing the bat across his throat.
He immediately began peppering the elf-like man with questions. “What’s going on? What did you do to me? What did you do to my town? How did all this happen? Answer me!”
Colin was actually quite surprised at his own ferocity, since he’d never acted like this before; well, not since he’d stood up to Corky Simpson in the fifth grade. But Colin was desperate for answers, because everything he’d seen since his accident had shaken him to his core. He told himself that anyone would have reacted similarly were they in his shoes. But he didn’t really believe that, and wondered if he was changing right along with the town… and perhaps not for the better.
The leprechaun winced where the bat touched the bare skin of his neck. He and forced it away from his throat with a surprising amount of strength for someone so small.
“Okay now, laddie, okay. You’ve caught me fair and square, so you’re entitled to your reward. Now, let me up and we can see to it straightaway.” But with one look at the expression on the little man’s face, Colin realized if he let him go now, he’d lose this chance forever.
“Uh-uh. First you talk, then I’ll think about letting you go.”
The little man’s face fell in a feigned look of defeat. Then he flashed a warm smile and shrugged. “Well, you’re a shrewd one, I’ll give you that. And fierce as well—perhaps you’ve a bit of the blood of old King Fergus himself in you. Nonetheless, I couldn’t give you any gold if I tried in me current state. But answers you shall have, so ask them.”
Colin considered the words, and found the implications to be shocking. “So, you really are a leprechaun?”
The leprechaun nodded. “Yes. Brogan’s the name, cobbling shoes and hiding gold is my game. I prefer to avoid granting wishes, if I can help it.”
“But shouldn’t you be wearing a long coat, with a four-leaf clover on it or something? And your accent isn’t as thick as I’d have imagined, either.”
Brogan grimaced. “Well now, if we’re going to be flirting with stereotypes, I’ll happily point out that you’re a little tubby to be a ball player. Don’t you think?”
“Very funny,” Colin replied with a frown. “It so happens that I’m the star player on my team. So, I’m in good enough shape.”
“Oh, are you now? And just when did this hidden athletic ability surface?” the strange little man asked with a smirk.
Colin paused, and thought back to when he’d first noticed his latent athletic skill. “About a month ago, I guess.”
“And would that be about the time you got the motorbike? And when your mom’s first art show opened? And when your buddy Jesse’s family got the new house and car, right after her dad got his old job back, and with a promotion as well?”
Colin cocked his head and squinted with suspicion. “Yeah—so what?”
Brogan pushed back on the bat slightly, and Colin realized he’d been leaning on it a little too hard. He eased up a bit to allow the little man space to speak.
Brogan continued. “Doesn’t it strike you as strange that everyone’s fondest wish seemed to come true, and all around the same time? It’s almost as if a spell came over your town, wouldn’t you say?” He wriggled his fingers and waggled his eyebrows as he said the last bit, which would have been funny if Colin was in the mood to laugh.
Colin blinked his eyes as he thought about the last few weeks. “Well, I guess I never thought much about it until today.”
“Until you bashed your head on me Blarney stone, you mean.”
Colin rolled off of the wee man who called himself Brogan and slumped against a pile of boxes. “To be honest, before that happened I just never cared. But when I crawled out of the bushes, everything had changed.”
Brogan sat up with a knowing smirk. “Indeed, because before that moment you were under the same spell as everyone else in this town. But once you laid hands on the Blarney stone, the spell was broken—at least for you, in any case.”
“But isn’t the Blarney stone in a castle in Ireland?”
Brogan looked at him appraisingly. “Well, you aren’t as daft as you look. No, not that Blarney stone; I was speaking of me own personal Blarney stone. There’s more than one, you know.”
“No, I didn’t.” Brogan looked momentarily disappointed as Colin continued. “So, what gives with the spell and the Blarney stone? Did you cast the spell over the town?”
Brogan looked down at his hands, and actually seemed ashamed. “Aye, lad, indeed I did. But for the telling of that sad tale, I’ll require a cup of tea to share it. Come on then, let’s retire to me humble home and I’ll tell you all about it.”
Colin sat up and helped the leprechaun to his feet. The little man patted him on the arm. “You’re a decent lad, for sure, and deserve an explanation. And, if me hunch serves correct, I believe we’ll be able to help each other—once you know the whole story.” He flipped the heavy manhole cover aside as if it was made from cardboard. Colin gasped.
Brogan winked at Colin over his shoulder. “Magic,” the leprechaun stated simply. Then he dropped down the hole and disappeared.
Colin thought the leprechaun had escaped, but once he climbed down the manhole he realized that the little man hadn’t given him the slip after all. Down below, Brogan stood in the light of an open doorway through the sewer wall. “Come now, lad, let’s have some proper tea and discuss entering a mutually beneficial arrangement.” He beckoned Colin
through the door, and followed him inside.
After Colin and Brogan entered through the door, it shut behind them with a small click, leaving a flawlessly smooth wall behind. When Colin looked again it was as if there’d never been a door there at all. Glancing around the room, Colin was amazed by what he saw; it was as if someone had taken a modern condo and relocated it underground. He was obviously standing inside Brogan’s home, but instead of looking like the hobbit-hole Colin might have expected, it had a definite bachelor pad feel to it. The living room looked as if it had been professionally decorated, and the fireplace was one of those fancy gas ones made of stainless steel and polished glass. The furniture was contemporary and colorful, and the decorations were more modern art than old country. Colin was impressed.
Brogan beamed with obvious pride, happy to be sharing his dwelling with a guest. “It’s amazing what you can do with a credit card and an IKEA catalog.” He gestured broadly, taking in the whole living area with a sweep of his hand. “Open concept. I stole the idea off of one of those home decorator shows.” Brogan admired his home briefly then nodded once. “Wish I could give you the grand tour, but time is short. Come, let’s have that tea now.”
Colin followed Brogan into a modern kitchen, complete with stainless steel appliances and a huge kitchen island in the center. The leprechaun put a kettle on the stove and began preparing tea for them while he spoke.
“This story starts several years ago, with me minding me own business in retirement, living quietly underground. Some time ago, I’d decided to retire and move to the States. I wanted to enjoy small town life here in the southwest, and your town was just what I’d been looking for. So, there I was in the midst of enjoying me retirement, and that’s when it all started. That’s when he showed up.” He paused as he brought out a beautiful silver tea service set. Once he’d prepared the china and kettle, he motioned for Colin to sit down at the nearby kitchen table, where he placed the tea along with a plate of Oreos and Girl Scout cookies.
