by Pamela Ann
“Oh, Jacks, don’t compare what we shared with him to this. This is different.” Reaching out, I gripped his arm, hoping he would see Drew’s side. “We’re always going to be here for him. Always. Nothing will ever change that. Let him enjoy this. Maybe his dad is ready this time around.”
He scoffed, obviously skeptical.
Bracing myself, I dragged my eyes away from Drew and Poppy, who were now speaking to a woman. Staring ahead at the horizon, I pulled my shawl closer around me, needing some comfort, some warmth, because everything felt cold all of a sudden.
“When did all of this happen, Jacks?”
“Since Drew and I began being at odds? He didn’t care for it when I said his father could just be using him.” Jackson sounded hurt.
“That’s very harsh, even for you, Jacks.” Jackson’s reaction was understandable, as was Drew’s. As friend and family to him, he should have been more supportive to whatever his friend had decided on. This was his father, not some random. One couldn’t just brush that aside. “He doesn’t have any family. Wouldn’t you have done the same?”
Jackson shook his head. “Not when the asshole had missing ninety-nine percent of my life and popped out of nowhere because he didn’t have an heir. Like, what kind of bullshit is that? Drew, the smartest kid I know, buys into that shit? If I don’t look out for him, no one will. We fight, but I do it because I don’t want him to end up hurt—that’s what friends are for. He’s already been through enough.”
“I know, Jacks. We all want the best for him.” My heart ached as I thought of Poppy. “But we have to trust that he knows what’s good for him.” If he was happy, then I would learn to be happy for him. It was all I could do. I hardly doubted I would ever stop loving him, but hopefully someday, the pain would subside.
“If he knew what was good for him, he would’ve fought for you.”
It was funny how Jackson seemed to easily accept my feelings for his best friend, but instead of asking him why he wasn’t against it, I decided not. He was only being kind. It was nothing to get emotional about.
“It’s all over now.” Exactly. All was said and done.
“Oh, Chloe. How can it be over when it didn’t even begin?”
It had, somewhat, but it had never taken off either.
“He doesn’t want me, Jacks. I’ve tried, but I couldn’t get through to him. It’s fine. I’ll be fine.” Even to my own ears, my words sounded forced.
“If there’s a man out there who closely matches just how much I love you, it’s him, Chlo. He’s stubborn as a mule, but he cares about you. Don’t give up just yet. Give him time. He’ll come around. Trust me.”
How could I argue that there wasn’t a spec of a chance for us? Jackson wouldn’t understand. Therefore, I kept my mouth shut and tried to appear unaffected.
After more guests arrived, it didn’t take long until they announced the food was being served on the black and white tented veranda. Though it was a bit chilly, the torches and fire pits made it warm.
I wasn’t sure what prompted me, but the moment I sat at one of the beautifully decorated rounded tables, I made an excuse of needing the bathroom. The thought of mingling with strangers while trying to act civilized would put me in a mental institution. Let’s face it. The last thing I needed was to be in a public setting. Okay, this was a private party, but apart from two souls, there wasn’t a familiar face around.
Before a panic attack seized me, I found myself back in the main house with two champagne flutes in my hands, randomly deciding to take a look around the grand place.
There was no way I would get the opportunity to give him his present, so maybe I would simply keep it to myself. Besides, it wasn’t as though he would detach himself from his woman long enough to care about other guests. What pissed me off even more was the fact that they looked perfect together.
No wonder things had changed for him. He had the world in the palm of his hand. It was rather funny how I had thought he was selling drugs at one point.
I peeked around the right wing of the house where the uniformed staff and guests weren’t around. The sound of the party faded into the background as I tried to grasp Drew’s newly found relationship with his father … and Poppy. And Caroline. My mind was overheating.
I found myself in a room with a lot of animal memorabilia, a pool table, tennis table, old-school arcade games, a chess table, and whatever else a game room could consist of. There was also a luxurious bar calling for me, and after finding a vintage bottle, I helped myself and took it with me toward the pool table. By then, all the drinks I had consumed had fully saturated my system.
If I were an insane woman, I would make a scene out there just to make Drew’s life less sweet than it looked. It would be quite the entertainment. Drew should be thankful I didn’t have it in me.
Plucking the black and white eight ball from the felted table, I weighed it in my hand before mildly throwing it in the air then catching it.
“If you plan to attack me with that, I suggest you choose something sharper and pointy,” the familiar voice echoed in the background.
I choked on my breath, hating that my body immediately responded to his presence. Don’t look at him, or he’ll see what you’re feeling.
Taking a sip of my strong drink, I placed the ball down as if it were poisoned. “I didn’t even realize you were here. Besides, I don’t need a weapon to hurt you.”
He was somewhere behind me. I could feel him, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. A part of me was afraid I might crumble and embarrass myself.
“So, this is your father’s home. You never mentioned him.” Yep, my mouth had its own mind. Damn it.
“I meant to when the time was right.”
Maybe he wasn’t comfortable sharing it. I would never know.
“She’s beautiful. The woman who was hanging off your arm earlier, I mean. Is it serious?” God, what is wrong with me? I keep fucking digging my own grave.
He took forever to respond, and when he did, he wasn’t coy. “I am still deciding on it.”
He was deciding? That was a major change from exclaiming he wasn’t boyfriend material. He had changed his mind quickly.
“You’re not one to have girlfriends,” I heard myself say before drinking the rest of the offending liquor, hoping the fire it lit inside would calm my nerves.
“That was before. Things change.” He sounded so close yet so far away. Why was he even here? Where was Poppy?
If I were wiser, I would change the subject or, better yet, run as far as I could. Nevertheless, I didn’t do any of that, because I was quite stupid when it came to him. I doubted that would change anytime soon.
Letting my forefinger graze the woodwork against the lacquered table, I braced myself for what was next. “What made you change your mind?”
“You.”
His response made me spin on my heels, facing his cool detachment as he eyed me incredulously.
“That’s a cruel joke!” I snapped. “You sent that text, telling me you were done with me. You said all those things. I—” Pausing as I tried to refrain myself from going full-on hysterical, I mistakenly gazed into his eyes, and just like that, I felt all the hurt and pain wash over me again and again. “How can you do this, knowing how much I love you?”
“Love.” He laughed darkly. “Don’t throw bullshit in the air, Chloe. You know nothing about love!” he viciously growled. “If that’s how you show how much you love me, by me catching you with your legs open while some guy fucks you, then I want nothing to do with it!” His face paled as he tried to reign in the anger he had quelled for so long.
How could he even question it?
“For days, I didn’t hear from you. I called, left you voicemails and messages, but I didn’t get anything back. Then Sunday came, and you sent me that message, saying you were done with me, with what we had at that time. You were gone, and for all I knew, you were sleeping with other women—”
“I came home to y
ou every fucking night for six days straight. That was unprecedented even for me! All I wanted was you. Every damn minute, hour, you were all I could think about. It was terrifying. I left because having you around made it difficult to do anything else. I needed some time to think and figure out what to do. I came back that morning, wanting to fix things, to ask you for forgiveness after I sent that text, realizing I didn’t want to lose you—”
“Don’t say that! You’re lying just to make me feel more awful than I already do.” That wasn’t how it had happened. He was fabricating this.
He pulled back a little, as if my accusation had touched a raw nerve. “I was addicted to you, Chloe. I couldn’t stay away.” His voice became so hesitantly low I had to lean closer to hear him. “I wanted you so much I thought of nothing but you when I left your bed each morning.”
I couldn’t look at him, not after he had said that. How could I have known he had felt that way? Sex had always been sex to him, so when he had come home, seeking my body, I hadn’t thought any differently, because I had believed it was normal for him. But it hadn’t been, and I had royally screwed myself over. My inexperience and gullibility had taken major roles in my poor decision making skills.
“I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
“Well, now you do.”
There was a finality to his voice that brought the truth home to me.
“Is there any way you could give me another chance? This time—”
“No!” he spat out.
It was six days ago. His feelings couldn’t have changed that quickly, could they? He had said he was addicted to me, as I was to him. If he could find it inside of him to forgive me, we might have a chance to be together instead of living in regret.
“We can start over. I want you more than anything,” I softly pleaded, unintentionally touching his chest and gazing up at his face. “One more chance … please.” My fingers dug into his shirt, never wanting to let him go again.
His eyes went dark. “You fucked him, Chloe, in the bed you’d been sharing with me. You fucked him, and you loved every second of it! How can you moan his name then ask for my forgiveness?”
My insides cringed as I listened to him describe it in such a way. However, if this was my last shot with him, all bets were off. Consumed by it all, I didn’t know where I got the strength to pull him to me and kiss him with everything I had. But no matter how much my tongue tried to pry his mouth open, he wasn’t responding.
Losing my momentum, I parted from his lips, only to kiss his neck before I found my favorite spot around the base of his neck and inhaled his scent deeply. “God, I miss you. Every night, I go to your room just so I can smell you. Come home … Come home to me, please. I need you.”
While overwhelmed with emotions, Drew was as responsive as a block of ice. Whatever advancement I made, he rejected.
“Tell me what to do, and I’ll do it.” Cradling his face with my palms, my eyes probed into his, hoping he would change his mind, but I couldn’t find any warmth anywhere.
Discouraged, I loosened my hold on his face and bit the inside of my lip, trying not to cry.
“You have ten minutes to convince me,” he said in a scratchy voice.
My gaze flickered back to his, questioning. “Ten minutes? To do what?” Then it dawned on me. “Seduce you?” He knew I was inexperienced in that department. It had always been him who took the lead. If this was his way of trying to humiliate me, he was using all his cards brilliantly.
Hesitantly, I glanced toward the exit. It was now or never. “The door …”
“It’s secured.”
Why would he do that? Unless …
“You planned for this to happen?” I accused, unsure how to feel about that.
“Only a precaution,” he stated, unperturbed. “Ten minutes, Chloe. The clock is ticking.”
I would have laughed had he not seemed so intimidating. What surprised me more was that I somehow found myself kneeling before him, looking up at him as I pulled down his zipper.
Everything went into a blur as his cock sprung free, huge and already engorged. Up close, it was alarming to think that his girth could fit into my mouth. And the more I stroked him, the thicker it became.
With the use of my tongue, I gently licked the moisture that glistened on his mushroomed head, teasing the tiny slit.
“Look at me,” he grunted out, harsh and demanding.
When I gazed up at him, our eyes connected as I gradually took him in until I had to stop halfway because his cock had already hit the back of my throat. Tears formed in the backs of my eyes, but I never tore my gaze away from him while I resumed gliding my mouth back up, reaching the head before sliding down his shaft, lubricating it.
Upon reaching that same spot, I had to use a little determination and force as I pushed him farther into my throat so he could get the utmost pleasure. It took a few more tries to become accustomed to it. I gagged as I bobbed my head, sliding my lips off his hard member while I gently massaged his scrotum.
His eyes penetrated me before he roughly took hold of the back of my head, stopping me altogether. Then he lifted me off the floor and roughly carried me to the pool table. He shoved my body against it while scurrying the pool balls away.
Out of my mind with lust, I clung to him, heavily panting as I watched him hurriedly rip my thong off with one swift tug before parting my legs. He then took hold of my hips, pulled me toward him until his cock met my opening, and slammed into me, long and deep.
“I want to chase the memory of him away, but I fucking can’t,” he said savagely as he cupped my chin, not letting my eyes disconnect from his.
“Don’t say that.” How could he? Not like this. Why was he still tormented by Cori when he was inside me?
His eyes flickered toward my lips, as if drawn to them, and then he brought his lips to my ear, fucking me harder than before.
“Feel my cock, Chloe. Remember it, because this is the last time you’ll ever feel it deep inside of you.”
“No!” I cried out, burying my face into his neck, sobbing while my body was in ecstasy.
He fucked me so hard I knew my skin had burns from the felt rubbing against my bare skin.
“Chloe,” he hissed as he closed his eyes and came inside me. The act felt sacred, powerful. I was knocked out of air.
Glued to him, I could feel him throb deep within my womb as we tried to level our breathing. Not once had he tried to kiss me, not once.
“Please say you’re going to at least give it some thought.”
“I used to be addicted to what your body could do for me. You still feel amazing, but it’s not the same anymore,” he coldly stated into my ear. “I can’t even look at you. That defeats the purpose of everything.”
He kept stepping on me over and over again. There was little chance of resurrecting me.
“Are you going to fuck her tonight to chase my memories away, Drew?”
“Why ask something that will only hurt you?”
He didn’t want me, yet he’d had to have sex with me to prove a point that he could have me anytime. He had treated me like a slut, and I hated him for making me feel so small. I supposed warmth didn’t come from the hell he had busted out of.
“I need a car waiting for me upfront to take me back to the city. Tell Jackson I had somewhere to go or whatever excuse you can come up with. I don’t give a fuck at this point. Lastly, I’m going to use the bathroom, but I want you of here before I come out. That’s all.”
He pulled away before gazing at my unfortunate, haphazard state. “Is there anything I can help you with?”
“No, I think you’ve done enough damage, Drew. You’ve obliterated me enough. Remember that I never gave up on you. But once I’m gone—really gone—only then will you notice my absence. And when the time comes and you begin to miss that girl who loved you so fucking much, don’t ever come crawling back, because there will be no one there to greet you.”
After my show of bravado, I slipp
ed off the pool table and ran into the bathroom, only to emerge ten minutes later to an empty room and a car waiting for me, just as I had requested. There was no Drew in sight, and I hadn’t expected any less from him.
Chapter 56
It was my first day at work, and after filling out forms for almost an hour, I couldn’t hide my relief when I finally got to meet the intern I would be assisting with. Basically, I was the bottom of the bottom, but I didn’t mind because I could learn a lot by starting out this way.
I was being shown to my desk when Jackson called for the second time. It was on vibrate, but even still, it was annoying as hell. So when he rang a third time, I knew I had to answer his call.
Slipping into the nearest supply closet, I answered, “Jackson, if you’re calling to ask if I forgot to buy bacon, yes, I did. Now get over it! This is my first day at work, so I’d appreciate it if you don’t get me in trouble!”
“Mom and Grandma are arriving in four hours. Gear up, booger face; this weekend should be fun.” He laughed as though he was looking forward to it.
Did he say Mom and Grandma?
“What? Why?” I groaned.
Oh, God. My mother could never learn of this internship, or she would ship me back home and force me to mingle with her Club Snoozefest.
“I don’t know why, but I just got off the phone with Dad.”
“We’re screwed.” Grandma was fun. Our mother was … annoying.
Jackson perked up. “Not if you’re on top of the sugar coating. Each time they try to ask about school, answer it without hesitation, but in a vague and uninteresting enough way that they will take to the next subject to divert them.”
As simple plans went, this was a good one as long as I stuck with it.
“Okay, good. We’ll be fine.” Hanging up the phone, I went through a few boxes consisting of staplers, paperclips, and whatever else I could find and take back to my desk in order to not look suspicious for being in the supply closet.
