Mother’s Ruin

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Mother’s Ruin Page 26

by Kitty Neale


  ‘I suppose so, but I’ve no money.’

  Ruth saw a flicker of annoyance in Andrew’s eyes, but then he pulled out a note, thrust it into Denis’ hand and said, ‘Here, but it might be a good idea to stay off the hard stuff.’

  Her mind was still confused. Andrew said he was here for his sister’s funeral. Laura! Surely he didn’t mean Laura? It seemed impossible to comprehend. Of all the places in London, Andrew’s sister had ended up living in Candle Lane.

  When Denis left, Andrew turned to face her again and Ruth’s breath caught in her throat. No wonder she had been so taken with Tommy. It was so obvious now, the family resemblance plain to see.

  ‘This has been a shock for both of us,’ he said, sitting down beside her and smiling faintly. ‘Do you know you’ve hardly changed, yet it must be well over twenty years since I last saw you.’

  ‘You haven’t changed much either. Maybe a bit less hair, but I knew you instantly. You said you were here for your sister’s funeral. Surely you don’t mean Laura? She was only in her early thirties.’

  ‘My parents had her late in life and there was a huge age gap between us.’

  Ruth’s mind was still reeling. Andrew hadn’t come looking for her. Why would he? He had no idea. When Laura’s funeral was over he’d go back to his wife and son in Scotland. If she told him the truth he’d probably be furious and it would only cause more problems, more heartache.

  ‘As you can see,’ Andrew now said, ‘there’s a lot to sort out, which means I’ll be here for about ten days or so.’

  ‘T . . . ten days,’ Ruth squeaked.

  ‘Yes, but don’t look so worried. Denis doesn’t need to know about us, and surely after all this time you’re not worried about your husband?’

  ‘Husband!’ Ruth blurted out. ‘But I haven’t got a husband. We divorced many years ago.’

  ‘So, you’re divorced. I’m on my own too. I lost my wife just over a year ago.’

  ‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ Ruth said, her mind jumping again. Andrew was a widower. Did that make a difference? She needed to be on her own, to have time to think. Andrew’s closeness was having an effect on her, one that after all these years, she was surprised to feel.

  She rose unsteadily to her feet. ‘I must go, but if you’re going to be around for over a week, perhaps we can talk another time.’

  ‘I’d love to see you again. Can I take you out to dinner one evening?’

  Ruth gulped. ‘I . . . I’m not sure,’ she stammered.

  ‘Ruth, where do you live? Is it close by?’

  ‘Live? But I thought you knew. I’ve been looking after Tommy. I live next door. I must go now. I . . . I’ll let you know about dinner,’ and with that she hurried home.

  ’Well, what did you think of Tommy’s uncle?’ Sally asked as soon as Ruth walked in.

  ‘He . . . he seems all right.’

  ‘Mum, you look a bit odd. Are you feeling all right?’

  ‘I’ve just got a bit of a headache,’ Ruth blustered. ‘I think I’ll have a bath and then an early night.’

  It didn’t help. At eleven-thirty Ruth was still awake, unaware that next door, Andrew was too.

  With Denis drunk again and snoring in the next room, Andrew was unable to sleep in his nephew’s lumpy bed. He got up and went downstairs, hoping that one of the fireside chairs might prove more comfortable.

  He heated some milk and then with a blanket wrapped around his legs, sat dwelling on Ruth. He’d been amazed to see her, and equally amazed to find the old attraction still there. Over the years he’d occasionally thought about her, and though their time together had been short, her face remained vivid in his memory. Compared to his wife, Ruth had been full of fun, her laughter infectious, and she had loved to dance.

  As his eyes roamed the kitchen, Andrew’s thoughts turned to his sister. He flung off the blanket and stood up, absent-mindedly fingering Laura’s few cheap ornaments on the mantelshelf. An old biscuit tin, the lid depicting a Highland scene, caught his eye, and opening it he saw it contained photographs, the top one of his sister’s wedding.

  Andrew carried the tin to the table and took out the photograph. Laura looked so happy and he felt a surge of pain. She was his sister, yet they had become like strangers. He put the photograph to one side and took out another, this an old sepia photo, cracked with age. It was one of his parents, his mother smiling, looking young, and pretty, but then Andrew’s eyes widened in shock. His mother looked nothing like that now, but he had seen that young smiling face somewhere, and recently.

  Comprehension dawned, along with anger. Why had she lied to him? If it wasn’t so late he’d confront her now, but he’d definitely have it out with her first thing in the morning!

  Dawn couldn’t come quickly enough for Andrew.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Waking with a start, Ruth found that she had her arms around Tommy. She was glad that she’d decided to put him in with her, the boy finding comfort in being cuddled. But what had woken her? Had someone knocked on the door? She glanced blearily at her bedside clock, saw it was only just after six and frowned when there was another loud knock. Who the hell was calling this early on a Saturday morning?

  She eased herself away from Tommy and threw on her dressing gown, still cursing as she went downstairs. ‘Andrew!’ she cried, stepping back as she registered the anger on his face.

  ‘You lied, told me it was a false alarm. Why?’

  Ruth shot a look over her shoulder. ‘Please,’ she begged, ‘keep your voice down. You’ll wake everyone up.’

  ‘I asked you a question and I’m waiting for an answer.’

  ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

  ‘Don’t act the innocent. I can’t believe I didn’t see it immediately. Does she know?’

  ‘We need to talk, but please, not . . . not here,’ Ruth stammered, her eyes wide with fear.

  His face suddenly softened. ‘Ruth, don’t look at me like that. I’m not a monster and I’m sorry for shouting, but this has knocked me for six. Look, Denis isn’t up yet and I doubt he’ll surface for some time. Why don’t you get dressed and come next door?’

  ‘All right, give me ten minutes.’

  Ruth closed the door quietly and crept upstairs, relieved that she was the only one awake. It was amazing that her mother hadn’t heard the racket, but so far there wasn’t a sound from anywhere in the house. She dressed quickly, snuck back downstairs, and left a note on the kitchen table in case anyone got up before she returned.

  At her soft knock, Andrew opened the door immediately, and when she followed him into the kitchen, he handed her a photo. ‘My mother,’ he said. ‘And as you can see, the resemblance is remarkable.’

  Ruth studied the face, her voice quaking. ‘I’m surprised you didn’t notice straightaway.’

  ‘Something niggled at me as soon as I saw her, but I just couldn’t figure out what it was until I saw that photograph. It’s obvious that she’s mine.’

  Ruth did her best to explain, often faltering as she tried to find the right words. ‘When my husband came home on leave and found me pregnant with your child, he . . . he begged me to stay with him, and promised to bring her up as his own. I didn’t know what to do, Andrew. Ours was a brief affair, and though I thought the world of you, Ken was my husband.’

  ‘I still had a right to know.’

  ‘I did what I thought was for the best. You had a wife and child of your own, and whether I was having your child or not, you’d still have gone back to them after the war.’

  For a moment he was quiet, but then he said, ‘I couldn’t have left my wife and son, but I still had a right to know about my daughter. I could have seen her occasionally, watched her grow up and been a part of her life. She’s beautiful, Ruth.’

  ‘Yes, she is, and I can only say I’m sorry. I did what I thought was for the best, but it turned out to be the biggest mistake I ever made.’

  ‘Why, Ruth?’

  ‘Ken ne
ver accepted Sally as his own and he made both our lives a misery.’

  ‘My marriage wasn’t happy either.’

  ‘Wasn’t it? I’m sorry.’

  His face softened a little, and he said, quietly, ‘Does Sally know that your ex-husband isn’t her father?’

  ‘She does now, but I didn’t tell her the truth until he left me.’

  ‘And when she found out, did she ask about me?’

  ‘Yes, but I knew so little about you. I knew what regiment you were in during the war, but that was all. It wasn’t enough for her to trace you.’

  ‘It sounds like you didn’t want her to find me?’

  ‘I had no idea how you’d react, or even if you’d accept her, and Sally had faced enough rejection. Not only that, how would your wife and son have felt if she’d turned up on your doorstep?’

  ‘I wouldn’t have rejected her, but as for my wife, you have a point. I doubt she’d have taken it well. However, things have changed and there’s no reason why I can’t get to know her. Please, Ruth, tell her who I am. I think you owe me that much.’

  Ruth stared into Andrew’s eyes, saw his plea, and knew she owed it to both him and Sally. ‘All right, come on then. There’s no time like the present.’

  Sally had only just got up when her mother came in, Tommy’s uncle with her. She looked at them, saw that her mother’s hands were shaking and asked, ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

  Her mother hesitated, looked at Tommy’s uncle, and then said haltingly, ‘Sally, I . . . I have something to tell you. Andrew is your . . . your father.’

  Sally couldn’t believe her ears, and astounded she squeaked, ‘My . . . my father?’

  ‘Yes, Sally.’

  She found herself dumbstruck, waiting to feel something, but she just felt numb. Ever since she’d found out that Ken Marchant wasn’t her real father she had dreamed of this moment, dreamed of finding her dad and being swept into his arms.

  Why couldn’t she react? Why couldn’t she move? He was looking at her, his expression soft, and a spark of recognition ran through her. She could see it now, see this man’s resemblance to both her and Angel – and it wasn’t just his red, curly hair. My God, he’s Angel’s grandfather!

  She stiffened as he began to walk towards her, but then his eyes seemed to fill and with a watery smile he held out his arms. Sally didn’t know how, but the next minute she was in them, being held tightly as his soft voice murmured in her ear, words that made her own tears fall. ‘Hello, my bonny lass.’

  ‘Why are you cuddling Sally?’

  They pulled apart, both now looking at Tommy. His hair was standing up like a brush, and suddenly the family connection and all it entailed, hit Sally. Laura Walters had been her aunt, and this little boy, the one she had once rejected, was her cousin!

  As if reading her thoughts, Ruth said, ‘Sally, don’t say anything for now. There’ll be enough time later.’

  Sally still couldn’t take it all in, and finding she was gripping her father’s hand she turned to look at him, his smile making her heart leap.

  His kindness became obvious too as he released her hand and squatted down in front of Tommy. ‘Now, lad, you can’t blame a man for cuddling a beautiful woman. Tell me, how are you?’

  ‘I’m all right, but where’s me dad?’

  ‘He’s still asleep, but you’ll see him soon. In fact, why don’t you get dressed and we’ll see if he’s up and about?’

  Tommy nodded, and as he ran from the room, Ruth shook her head worriedly. ‘I’m only just beginning to see how difficult this is going to be. There’s going to be a lot of explaining to do.’

  ‘Yes, but for now I’d like to concentrate on my daughter. Are you all right, lassie?’

  ‘It’s been a bit of a shock, and my head is still spinning.’

  ‘I hope it’s been a pleasant one. You and I have a lot to catch up on.’

  ‘I’ll have to tell my mother,’ Ruth said. ‘In fact, I’ll see if she’s awake.’

  She was about to leave the room when Angel burst in. ‘Mummy, tell Tommy! He won’t let me in the bathroom and I want to pee!’

  There was a stifled, choking sound, but then Andrew’s laughter rang out, filling the room. Sally found it infectious and grinned, whilst Angel stood hopping, her face indignant as she said, ‘Mummy, it’s not funny. Tell Tommy!’

  Sally took her daughter’s hand, still hearing Andrew’s laughter as they went upstairs. My father, she thought. That man’s my father, and suddenly it was wonderful.

  When Andrew finally stopped laughing, Ruth said, ‘You do realise that Angel is your granddaughter?’

  ‘What did you say?’ a voice boomed.

  ‘Mum! I was just coming to see you.’

  ‘Did I hear you say that this is Angel’s grandfather?’

  ‘Yes, he is. Sit down before you fall down, Mum, and I’ll tell you all about it.’

  Ruth only just had time to tell her mother before Tommy dashed back into the room, and hoping that Sadie would have the sense to keep quiet, she said hurriedly, ‘That was quick, love. Are you ready for your breakfast?’

  ‘Can me uncle have some too?’

  Andrew shook his head. ‘I think Ruth has enough mouths to feed. Have your breakfast, lad, and then come next door. I’m sure your father will be up by then.’

  ‘Can’t I come now?’

  Andrew looked at Ruth and seeing her quick nod he said, ‘Yes, all right. I’m sure I can rustle up something for us both to eat.’

  Ruth accompanied them to the door, whispering, ‘Thanks, Andrew. My mother’s still in shock and I don’t trust her to keep her mouth shut.’

  ‘They’ll have to be told.’

  ‘Yes, and soon, but give me time to draw breath first.’

  ‘Told what?’ Tommy asked.

  ‘Little pigs have big ears,’ Ruth said, smiling down at the boy.

  ‘I ain’t a pig!’ Tommy said indignantly.

  ‘I know you aren’t. Now go on home with your uncle and I’ll see you later.’

  ‘Ruth, we’ll talk again soon,’ Andrew said, ‘but Denis and I have got a lot to sort out today. The funeral,’ he silently mouthed. ‘Will it be all right if I send the boy back in about an hour?’

  ‘Yes, of course it will,’ she said, hiding her worries as she closed the door. It had gone well, and Sally had taken to Andrew immediately, yet as she had watched their growing closeness, her mother’s words came back to haunt her. She was right – girls did cling to their fathers.

  Ruth remembered her own father, her devastation when he died, and now shivered. Andrew would be going back to Scotland soon, his home a long, long way from London. Had she set Sally up for more heartbreak?

  Andrew was glad he’d got a little food in and after scrubbing a saucepan and then doing the same to the grill pan, he managed to rustle up beans on toast. He chatted to Tommy as the boy cleaned his plate finding that he was a nice lad, a bit rough round the edges, but his intelligence shone through. In some ways he reminded him of his own son at that age, both having the same quick mind.

  He wondered how not only Donald, but his parents too, would take the news about Sally. He wanted her to be a part of his life, to make up for all the missing years, and not only Sally, his granddaughter too.

  It was another half an hour before Denis got up, scratching his head, his face showing the ravages of drink when he walked into the kitchen and said hoarsely, ‘Any tea in the pot?’

  ‘Yes, but I doubt it’s still hot.’

  Denis didn’t seem to care as he poured himself a cup, then asked, ‘Did Ruth send you home, Tommy?’

  ‘No, Uncle Andy came and fetched me.’

  ‘How come you know Ruth?’ Denis asked.

  ‘It’s a long story. We’ll talk about it later.’

  ‘You fobbed me off yesterday. What’s wrong with now?’

  ‘I said later, man. For now we’ve got a lot to sort out, arrangements to make, so I suggest you get ready to go out.�


  ‘Yeah, yeah, all right.’

  ‘Can I come wiv you?’

  ‘No, you flaming well can’t,’ Denis snapped.

  Andrew ruffled Tommy’s hair. ‘We won’t be long, lad, but for now run on back to Ruth.’

  Tommy hesitated and Denis yelled, ‘Do as you’re told!’

  ‘There was no need to shout,’ Andrew said, as Tommy ran out. ‘You seem to be forgetting that the boy has just lost his mother.’

  ‘Yeah, well, he’s better off with Ruth for now,’ Denis said, ‘and as I asked before, how come you know her?’

  Andrew decided that with Tommy out of earshot he might as well get it over with. ‘I met Ruth many years ago, in fact during the war, but haven’t seen her since.’

  ‘I see, like that was it? I’ve heard stories about the things that went on during the war. What was that little ditty? Oh, yeah. “When their men were away, the wives went out to play.”’

  ‘Shut up! It wasn’t like that. Ruth hadn’t heard from her husband for a very long time and thought he’d been killed in action. You have no idea what it was like. Bombs rained down almost every night and Londoners were going through hell. Many thousands were killed or lost their homes, and with strict rationing they were on near-starvation diets. All right, Ruth and I met, and yes, we had an affair, but those were desperate times. People lived for the day, knowing that it might be their last.’ Andrew stopped speaking, annoyed with himself for justifying what happened.

  ‘All right, keep your shirt on, mate.’

  ‘That isn’t the end of the story, and when you hear the rest I don’t want any more derogatory remarks.’ Andrew took another steadying breath. ‘You see, Ruth’s daughter is my child.’

  ‘What! Sally Marchant is your daughter! Blimey.’

  Andrew watched as Denis digested the news and waited for him to take on board the implications.

  He didn’t have long to wait as the light dawned in Denis’ eyes. ‘Bloody hell! This means that Tommy is related to the Marchants. I can’t believe this. It’s amazing.’

  ‘Listen, I don’t think Tommy is ready to hear any of this yet. He’s just lost his mother and it would be too much for him to take in.’

 

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