by K R Martin
"The pleasure is mine," the heavily accented voice said. Will was surprised that he knew the language common in Cartiana and Espan, but he was grateful that they wouldn't need a translator. "I know our kingdoms are not true neighbors, but Vikieva would like to extend our hand in friendship."
"I would be honored to receive you and your company as guests. And I look forward to bettering our relationship." A smile broke on Fedor's face, and Will was looking forward to getting to know this new friend. "I will be honest, I wasn't expecting quite as many guests, but I am sure we can find room to accommodate you all," Will teased. Motioning one of his own staff over, he quickly explained what needed to be done before sending the man to hurry to finish. "My staff should be finished quickly, and will be more than happy to show you to your rooms. I am sure you're tired from your journey, so take the afternoon to rest, and we look forward to you joining us this evening for dinner and festivities, Prince Fedor."
"Fedor," he replied. "If we are to be friends, I believe titles are unnecessary."
"Very well, Fedor, most of my friends call me Will."
"I think the name suits you." Fedor nodded once more before he turned back to his people. He spoke in a foreign language to one of the men who then spoke with the others.
"That's his personal assistant," Jonathan spoke quietly from Will's side. "I know it's sudden, but I think this is a good surprise."
"Honestly, I believe it is too. Walk with me?" Jonathan gave him a look that was pure 'of course', causing Will to laugh before they strolled away from the commotion towards the training fields. "I didn't tell you by letter, but Fedor isn't the first foreigner wanting to negotiate relations with Cartiana and Espan."
"And you didn't tell me, why?"
"They're from Retanny." Jonathan's footsteps stopped. Will felt the sigh before nudging his friend to keep walking.
"You're joking with me, right?"
"I wish I was. Our esteemed guests are Lord Conrad, the brother-in-law to Retanny's emperor, and his daughter Desiree, who happens to be the heir to the throne."
"Oh no. I can already see where this is going."
"Absolutely. I suppose I should be grateful that I am used to men throwing their daughters at me, but this is certainly the most frustrating."
"And since he's a foreign dignitary, you have to play nice."
"She looks like Renee," Will blurted out.
"What?" Jonathan asked as he tripped over his feet.
"She's the same age Renee was when we reconnected, and she looks so much like her, Jonathan, it hurts. I have a hard time looking at her and not seeing my wife." Will swallowed the lump in his throat, wishing he could swallow the pain with it.
"I am sorry, Will," Jonathan's hand was gentle on his friend's shoulder.
"It's become bearable, if annoying." A soft thudding sound reached his ears, and Will felt the smile tug at his mouth. "There is another reason for that. I have a special guest I look forward to you meeting." His steps seemed to quicken as they drew closer to the field. His gaze immediately found the black-clad figure sending arrows into a target. But then, he saw a male figure standing near the edge.
"Ah, Your Majesty," the man said as he gave him a bow.
"What brings you out here?" Will asked of the head falconer.
"I was actually giving Arrow a chance to stretch his wings," the man said as he motioned to the creature flying in the air. Will lifted his eyes to see his beloved falcon soaring in the clouds.
"That is a sight I have missed," Will breathed. The last time they went hunting, just before Varda arrived, the falcon had clipped his wing on a tree, and kept him from flying for a while. It filled him with joy to see the bird he had raised since a chick fly so freely. Suddenly, the bird dove, soaring towards the ground. The wings released just before it hit, and the bird floated the last little bit, landing on Varda's shoulder. Will's breath hitched.
"Now that is a sight I never thought I'd see again," Jonathan's voice seemed to float to Will. "No wonder you thought Desiree looked like Renee. Seeing Arrow on her shoulder looks just like Renee did."
"The funny thing is, that is not Desiree," Will said, feeling his heart slow to normal again. But Jonathan was right; Varda strongly resembled Renee, weapon in hand, head held high, and Arrow perched on her shoulder. If only she’d let him see her face and answer that question once and for all. "That is the infamous Captain Varda."
"Now I know you are joking with me," Jonathan chuckled. "You're not?" Will shook his head and Jonathan's jaw dropped. "How did you manage that?"
"She merely arrived," Will replied. Her laughter rose on the sky, warming his heart as her hand stroked the bird. "She's been training the men, and tonight you'll understand why. Jonathan," Will's voice dropped, keeping his tone as quiet as possible. "Desiree reminds me of Renee in looks, but Varda reminds me of Renee's spirit. Her strength, determination, and kindness just shine like Renee's did. I haven't told anyone else this, mostly because no one else is as close as a brother to me, but I have to be truthful with you. I feel like I'm falling for her." Jonathan's jaw dropped as his eyes opened. "I know. I never thought I could love another. I still love Renee so deeply, and the feelings I have for Varda are different, but I can't seem to help myself. I'm a lost cause aren't I?"
"Well, you're getting there. You do seem happier, which makes me happy. But, as your honorary brother, I feel I should meet this wonderful girl."
Will chuckled before he led his friend to meet the woman who had brought so much joy back in his life. She charmed Jonathan, and his friend seemed at ease, but Will knew his friend was still in for a surprise that evening. He was looking forward to it.
19
"So that is how you gained such a reputation," Jonathan said, winded, as Renee helped him to his feet. Will had prompted his friend to test his sword against hers, and Renee couldn't help but roll her eyes at her husband's mischievous twinkle.
"I had some amazing teachers," Renee responded, her gaze turning to where Deshi and Sorik sat, prideful smiles gracing their faces.
"It shows. I should've known better than to take Will's bait," Jonathan joked under his breath. Will chuckled as he stepped closer. "And let me guess, she didn't touch you."
"No, actually, her sword did kiss my neck," Will admitted. "But, mine kissed hers too." Jonathan laughed as others began to swarm around them.
"You were wonderful, darling." Renee turned to watch Jonathan's wife stroll towards him.
"Thank you," Jonathan gave her a quick kiss as he pulled her into his arm. "Varda, I would like to introduce you to my wife, Catherine."
"Everyone calls me Katie; it is so nice to meet you," Katie said, her eyes practically glowing.
"It is nice to meet you too," Renee replied. She fought the urge to pull the woman who had once been her best friend into a hug.
"And here I though Renee and I were the only women who loved sailing," Katie joked. "I still can't believe you've done so much! You are legendary."
"I don't know if I'm quite all that," Renee blushed under her friend's enthusiasm.
"Hey, we sea lovers need to stick together," Katie slipped from her husband's arm to slide her arm through Renee's. "And, I'm hoping you'd be willing to show me how to dance like you did. That was incredible!"
"I suppose Ama Lei and I could show you some of the movements," Renee said.
"Is there a chance I could learn too?" Desiree's voice broke the moment. Renee tried not to resent the girl as her eyes were filled with hopeful wonder.
"Why not?" Renee responded with a smile.
"This will be so much fun!" Katie said as she looped her other arm into Desiree's. "I love Cartiana; it has been a joy, but I've longed for some of the same excitement I used to enjoy as a girl. I think this is just what I've been wanting." Renee couldn't stop the smile. There was a reason she had become so close with Katie during her voyage on the Dawn Chaser.
"Then tomorrow we can meet for some dance lessons, probably after I work to trai
n with the men." Renee smiled at them, earning a huge grin from her friend, and a smile filled with joyful hope from Desiree.
"You both learn quickly," Renee noted as they finished up the dance lessons for the day.
"Thank you," Desiree blushed. "My dance lessons were always my favorite growing up." Renee could understand the girl's sentimentality. Amongst all of her lessons, dancing was her favorite as well. "It seemed to be the only thing I was good at." The words were spoken softly, with sorrow behind them.
"You are so graceful," Katie supplied. "I know I love dancing, but you are lovely to watch."
"Thank you," Desiree's smile seemed to widen. "It's been a while since I've been able to truly learn something new, and I really enjoyed it. Thank you, Lady Varda, for this opportunity."
"Please, just Varda."
"Varda. Honestly, this opportunity means so much to me. It's a rare moment when I've actually chosen something for myself." Renee felt her smile fall. How well she knew that sentiment.
"You know, Renee was my dearest friend," Katie started as she sat on a bench, Desiree choosing a space beside her. Renee found herself sinking into a nearby chair, drawn as if by magic. "And while I got to know her during a time when she was far more in control of her life, she would tell me of how her life was not really her own. How every day was planned, what knowledge she could learn was chosen for her. Even her husband was decided without her consent."
"Everyone thinks being royalty is so glamorous," Desiree continued. "They don't see the gilded bars we live in."
"If those bars were gone, what would you wish?" Renee asked.
"I don't think I'd want the sea, as Queen Renee had chosen. But I know I want to meet more people. Being here has been far more enjoyable than I expected it to be. I got to meet you," she told Renee. "And I've heard some of your stories of the other kingdoms, the cultures. It's exciting to hear how similar we are to others, and how different as well. And you got to enjoy that! How I envy you."
"It had good moments, but don't get me wrong, it wasn't easy," Renee told the girl.
"I'm wondering if anything in life is ever easy," Desiree said softly.
"Don't you have any fond memories?" Katie asked.
"Some, I suppose," Desiree said. "But it's hard to have good memories when you're groomed to marry the next emperor of your kingdom."
"I thought you were the heir?" Katie asked.
"I am. My uncle could never conceive, and I was the only child his sister, my mother, gave birth to. But while I may be the one crowned, they are certainly expecting me to marry the man of their choosing, so he can be the next ruler." Renee understood well the bitterness in the girl's voice.
"Sounds like something Renee said," Katie chuckled. "But even with everyone's expectations, she forged her own path. I think you could as well."
"You haven't met my father," Desiree quipped. "Or my uncle."
"Well, I think I can rope Jonathan into helping keep your father busy, and your uncle is nowhere near Espan," Katie winked. "Why don't you start to relax? Honestly, who do you want to be?"
"I don't know," Desiree replied, her eyes betraying the deep thought in her mind. "If you all wouldn't mind talking when you can, I think I would love that. And..." She looked around the room, as if to verify that they were the only ones there. "Can I tell you a secret?"
"Yes, please!" Katie leaned in, her eyes dancing with merriment. Even Renee chuckled as she leaned closer.
"This isn't my real hair," Desiree's conspiratorial tone was soft but light, as if happy to share this. Renee couldn't stop the jolt back. A glint in the girl's eyes, she ran her fingers along the edge, where her hair met her skin, and pulled a cap back enough to reveal the bright golden hairs hiding beneath.
"Oh, your hair's lovely!" Katie exclaimed with a smile. Renee couldn't stop the laugh that finally escaped her mouth. Her hands flew to her lips, attempting to end the chuckles. Both Katie and Desiree looked at her as if she had lost her mind.
"Forgive me," Renee finally managed to say. "It's just..." her voice lowered to the conspiratorial tone, "I know your father, and uncle, are hoping for a marriage alliance with the King of Cartiana." Desiree blushed. "But the irony is, you wear a black wig to hide your blonde hair, to look like Princess Renee, where for most of her life, she wore a blonde wig to hide her black hair."
"No, she didn't!" Desiree almost squealed.
"Oh, she did," Katie agreed.
"You know, I like King William," Desiree opened up. "But he loves Renee so much. I don't want to marry a man that couldn't love me because he loves another. I wasn't raised to marry for love, but I always hoped. And, I don't think I could love him. I know I could never replace his wife, and as kind as his children are, I don't really connect with them. But, if he offers for my hand, I can't refuse."
Renee remained quiet for a moment. This girl was as much of a prisoner as she was. Was there a way to keep her from making that choice?
"You should know something about Will," Katie spoke, taking the girl's hand between her own. "He fell deeply in love with Renee. A person, who's tasted love like that, won't be willing to settle for less. And if you don't love him, he won't force it, even if he does fall for you, highly unlikely, no offense. Renee's was a love like no other." Renee fought down the lump that found its way into her throat.
"Thank you," Desiree sighed with relief. "I don't know why I felt like telling you both. I barely know you."
"Sometimes, it helps to just let out the burdens to people who won't judge," Renee said softly, taking Desiree's other hand. "I, for one, know what it's like to have to hide. So, whenever you need to relax, to be yourself, both of us are here for you."
"Thank you, both of you. I never really had girls for friends before. It feels nice."
"I bet it does." Renee couldn't stop the smile on her face, or the warmth in her heart.
Arms linked, the girls giggled as they walked through the halls. After hearing Desiree's story, and Katie's assurances that Will's heart still belonged to her, Renee felt lighter about the girl's presence. The girl was just as trapped as she was, and Renee was determined to try to make her stay better. She doubted Desiree even knew that her father was a pirate. After all, Conrad, or Schwarz Feur, had his first mate do most of the dirty work, and Renee was the only one to realize his identity and live.
They turned the corner, jolting as they all stopped before hitting Fedor.
"Your Highness," Katie was the first to curtsy, Renee following. Desiree gave a slight curtsy, her back once again straight, and her eyes down and demure.
"Your Highness," Fedor bowed to Desiree, his back straightening tall.
"We just finished our dance lesson." Katie continued. "Captain Varda has been so nice to take her time to teach us."
"That is kind of her," he nodded to Renee. "She is quite busy training the men, and I am sure it takes a lot out of her to dance and fight so many times a day."
"She is quite generous with her time," Desiree said, her voice taking on a bite to it.
"Of course she is. I never suggested otherwise. What I meant is that it's kind of her to take time away from something important, training men, to humoring a princess to learn yet another style of dance." Renee almost stepped back. She met him a few days prior, and he seemed nice then.
"And of course dancing is a useless pursuit of time," Desiree spat back. "But then again, a younger son wouldn't understand the weight that comes with always being the spotlight."
Renee's gaze caught Katie's over the girl's head. Neither of them had heard her with so much strength in her tone.
"Well, I suppose I shouldn't take up any more of Lady Varda's valuable time." He gave Desiree as minimal a bow as he could before giving Renee a more sincere nod of the head. Brushing past them, he disappeared the way they came.
"Princess Desiree, I do believe you found your voice," Katie teased.
"I am so sorry!" she said, her eyes wide with shock. "I don't know what's with me. Ever since
I first met him, for some reason I seem to say the worst things around him."
"Well, I for one like the little spirit," Katie winked.
"Just, please can we keep this between us? I do try to be nice, especially in front of father, but it seems the prince always brings out the worst of me."
"Your secrets are safe with us," Renee smiled at her as they continued their walk. Their feet carried them into a large room, toys strewn all over the floor, and several children giggling as they played.
"Mama!" one of the girls split from the group, running straight for Katie.
"Hello, Louisa," Katie said as she bent and picked up her two-year old. Renee remembered how Katie was ready to deliver her child right before her kidnapping, and it was so nice to see the little girl with the same vibrant green eyes that her parents shared. "Say hello to Captain Varda and Princess Desiree."
"Hewo," the girl said before burying her face in her mother's shoulder.
"Mamamama!" Renee easily recognized Spera's voice as she toddled over, her feet still slightly shaky, partly from her excitement over finally being able to run. Smiling, Renee scooped her own daughter in her arms, the happiness spreading as the little girl bundled against her mother.
"I know it doesn't make sense now," Katie said, talking to Desiree, "but one day I hope you'll understand the magic of having your own children."
"I do too." Desiree responded.
"Alright, little one, it's nap time," Renee told her daughter.
"Can Spewa pway, pwease?" Rosa asked as she walked over.
"And Wisa too?" Willy asked joining her.
"I'm sorry, but it's her nap time," Renee told her twins.
"Awwww," they pouted in unison.
"And it's Louisa's nap time as well," Katie told them, ruffling Willy's hair. "Actually, isn't it time for you two to take a nap?"
"Yes it is," the nurse said as she stepped towards them, gathering the twins’ hands in her own.
"Pwease? No nap?" Two sets of brown eyes grew wide as they gazed up at Renee, as if she was the magical person who could save them. Renee chuckled even as a bitter smile rested on her face.
