by Lori L. Otto
She shifts her body slightly when I go to her to remove her delicate lingerie. I kiss her softly, my tongue exploring her intimately. When she lets out a long sigh, I give one last kiss, then stand up in front of her. She pulls down my briefs and touches me gently, the warmth spreading quickly throughout my body. I take her hands in mine and lead her into the large walk-in shower, three separate shower-heads trickling hot water down our bodies.
Hours later, after Emi falls asleep, I get up to stoke the fire and add some more wood. The warm orange glow of the flames dances in her hair, making it even redder. Her expression is peaceful, content. I could sit here and continue to admire her body from afar, or I could go to her and feel her soft curves in hopes of rousing her from her sleep.
I lie down on the comforter next to her, matching the angles of her body with my own, and put my arm across her body, pulling her into me. Small drops of perspiration dot her forehead, and I wonder if they linger from the night’s activities or if she’s too hot in the blanket, so close to the fire. I kiss her bare shoulder, then move her hair from obstructing my view of her soft neck. Her hair has really grown out. I hadn’t realized how much, subtle differences from day to day, but it’s inches below her shoulders. I comb my fingers through it, gently working out a few knots, eventually allowing my tongue to trace up her neck, jawline, settling on her ear lobe. This awakens her. I should have let her sleep, I know.
She rolls over onto her back, smiling. “How are you not exhausted?” she asks me, running her fingers through my undoubtedly messy hair. I slowly, lightly tease her lips with mine, and she responds with a deeper kiss and a soft moan. “I love you,” she whispers to me. My heart full, I return her sentiment in both words and gentle, attentive actions.
“Jack!” Emi says in a panic the following morning, sitting up hurriedly.
“What?” I open my eyes, the sun pouring into the room through the large windows.
“Weren’t we supposed to meet everyone for breakfast at nine?”
“What time is it?”
“Nine.”
“Mmmm,” I respond, pulling her back down to kiss her.
“You don’t seem very concerned.”
“I am always on time. Always the one who waits on everyone else. It’s someone else’s turn today,” I smile. “I just want to take my time with you... take in every second.”
“Well, if you’re always on time, then they’re going to blame me. I already bailed on dinner last night. The cards are already stacking against me. The goal is for them to like me, right?”
“Are you worried that they don’t?” I ask.
“I’m worried that they won’t,” she corrects me. “They don’t know me yet.” She stands up and holds her hand out to help me up.
“They’re going to love you,” I assure her. “Matthew is the biggest critic, and it was love at first sight with him. Just like it was with me.”
“Awwww,” she says, mockingly. “Come on! We have to get ready! I’m going to take a shower.”
“That’s all you had to say. I’m coming,” I tell her. She glares at me, but can’t keep from laughing.
“Sorry, we missed the alarm,” I announce to the family flippantly as we sit down. Emi’s beautiful blushing cheeks, averted eyes, give our earlier activities away, though. God, I love her.
“Did you sleep well?” my mother asks.
I pour coffee for both of us and let Emi answer.
“Very well, thank you,” she politely states, and my mother smiles and nods.
“You just lied to my mother,” I whisper in her ear. “We’ve never had a more sleepless night.” She slaps my thigh and laughs.
“No, Mrs. Holland,” Emi says quietly, leaning in to me, so only I can hear. “Your son and I fooled around in the shower first... and then shortly after I dozed off, he woke me up, and we did it again a little later on the floor, by the fireplace. Eventually, we did go to bed, but only to make love one more time... and this one was crazy, we tried some new things... you should have seen it, Mrs. Holland. I think we both passed out from sheer exhaustion around four this morning. And then, in the shower this morning...”
I tuck an errant strand of hair back under her pink knitted cap and kiss her. “I had an amazing night, Em.”
“Me, too.” She blushes again.
“I’d forego sleep any night for you.”
“I’m sure you would,” she laughs.
“You two better eat something, we’ve got a long day of skiing ahead of us,” Matthew says, passing a basket of muffins and giving us a knowing glance. “Might need to keep your strength up,” he says under his breath, lifting a brow. Emi’s mouth falls open before a quick laugh escapes. I put my fingers below her chin and pull her toward me, kissing her lips softly.
“Mr. Holland,” Bill calls to me from across the dining room. “How are you enjoying your stay so far?”
“It’s been incredible, thank you.”
“Does anyone have any special requests for today?” I look around the table, and everyone shakes their head.
“Nothing more than what we discussed,” I tell him.
“And dinner for sixteen tonight in the formal dining area?” he confirms.
“Yes, everyone will be here for dinner. My brother-in-law and nephews should be arriving in the early afternoon.”
“Right, there will be a car waiting for them at the airport.”
“Thanks, Bill.”
“Anything, Mr. Holland. You have my number if you need anything.” I nod as he walks to talk to the guests at the next table.
“What did you discuss?” Emi asks me.
“Oh, just, you know, about the car for Thomas and stuff.”
“And stuff?” she asks. “Stuff?” That word really isn’t in my vocabulary... and she knows that.
“Just eat your breakfast, Poppet,” I say to her playfully, obviously dodging her questions.
“Emi, are you a good skier?” Renee asks.
“I have no idea,” she says. “I’ve never tried.”
“I hadn’t either when I first came,” Steven’s fiancée admits. “I stayed on the beginner slopes the first time. But the second time, I got out there with all the adults. It takes some skill, but it’s more about confidence.”
“But by now, even all the kids are probably pros, right?” Emi asks.
“Not the little ones,” Steven says. “They’ll need a chaperone.” I notice sarcasm or something in my brother’s voice, and begin to pay more attention to his attitude toward Emi.
“I’m great with kids,” Emi smiles, undeterred.
“Lexi’s never skied before, either,” Renee says. “She’s a little scared.”
“Well, we can learn together, right Lex?” The child nods her head enthusiastically.
“It’s Lexi,” Steven says, and Renee and I both glare at my brother.
Emi looks surprised, but quickly apologizes to Renee’s daughter. “I’m sorry, Lexi. I thought I heard someone call you that earlier.”
“I don’t mind,” she returns, taking a bite of her cereal and smiling.
“If you’ll excuse me,” Emi says, “I’m just going to go to the ladies room.” I study her face, and she seems fine.
“I’ll go with you,” Renee offers, and both women make their way to the restrooms.
“What’s up, Stevie?” I ask my brother, kicking him under the table. “You’re never like this. Why in the world are you being like this to her?”
“I just don’t trust her,” he says. “I don’t think she’s over that other guy... which makes me wonder why she’s with you...”
“And why do you think she’s with me?” Matthew and Kelly slide into the seats left by our girlfriends, noticing the heated conversation.
“I would guess money,” he says. “Seems pretty obvious.”
“What’s going on?” Kelly asks.
“Stevie’s being an ass,” I tell her.
“Jacks is being a fool,” Steven counters.
/> “How so?” Lucas asks, joining the conversation, standing behind Matthew and me.
“I think she’s still in love with that other guy. Nobody gets that upset over someone that they don’t care about anymore.”
“Of course she still cares about him,” my sister chimes in. “He died. Her best friend and lover died. She’d be inhuman if she didn’t care about him.”
“Well, how does that work?” Steven asks. “She lost her best friend, lover, her soulmate. What does that make you, Jacks?”
Soulmate. Such an odd word. I hadn’t– for the longest time– considered I had one... mainly because the one I thought was mine belonged to someone else for so long. But isn’t she mine? Am I hers? Can people have more than one?
“It makes me the man that she loves now. That’s all I want from her. That’s enough for me... it should certainly be enough for you.”
“She makes him really happy,” Kelly says. “You’re not around to see it, but I am. Jacks has always been considerate and generous and giving... he’s always been about doing things for other people. And I know it’s always made you happy,” she says, looking at me. “But there was always a sort of emptiness, something missing, some sadness inside of you. And it’s gone, with her.”
“It seems like she makes you someone you’re not,” Steven says. “Kissing in front of us, you were an hour late to breakfast... that’s not you.”
“I’m finished with this conversation,” I tell him. “I don’t have to justify myself or explain myself to you.”
“Give her a chance, Stevie,” Matthew says. “She seems really genuine, and if nothing else... have you ever seen Jacks so happy?”
“I just don’t buy it.” I feel my heart rate rise, anger welling inside of me, which is pretty hard to evoke in me.
“Boys,” my mother says, far enough away from the conversation to be unable to hear, but close enough to feel the tension between us.
“This is really uncalled for,” I mutter to Steven.
“Hey, I’m just looking out for you.”
“Well, don’t,” I tell him.
When Renee and Emi return to the table, Steven stands up and asks if anyone is ready to ski. Everyone begins to gather their things.
“Black Diamond this way,” he says, gesturing to one side of the table. “Bunny hills over there.” He points to Emi, who shrugs her shoulders and smiles. Renee crosses the table to stand next to me and Emi.
“What are you doing?” Steven asks her.
“Lexi’s never skied before,” she says. “I’m going to help teach her. Come on, kids,” she calls to my nieces.
“You can go with them,” Emi encourages me. “I’ll be fine.”
“Absolutely not,” I tell her, wanting to avoid my little brother just as much as I want to spend time with her.
“You guys have fun,” my father says. “Your mother and I will be in the lodge, so if the kids need a break, just send them in.”
“I’ll check in when Thomas and the boys get here,” Kelly says, joining Steven, Matthew and Lucas as they leave the dining area.
“Jacks, I’m sorry,” Renee says after we’ve partnered the little girls up with a ski instructor. I wasn’t going to talk about it any more. “I don’t know what’s gotten into him.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I tell her. “I’m not.”
“He has no right to be that way to you,” Renee tells Emi. “I’m kind of embarrassed by him right now.”
“It’s okay,” Emi says. “One out of twelve ain’t so bad,” she jokes.
“It’s really one out of sixteen,” I correct her. “Thomas and the boys like you, too.”
“Right. I’m not sure what I did... but oh, well.”
“You didn’t do anything,” I assure her. “Sometimes, I think he’s just a little naive.”
“He can be,” Renee says. “Understanding the complexities of love is not his forte. He broke up with me after our first couple of arguments,” she goes on, “before I explained that it’s normal for people to fight... even people in love.”
“He believes there’s one woman made for every man, and vice versa. Very idealistic,” she explains. “I like that he thinks that I’m the one for him. I love that everything’s pretty simple with him.
“But he has a hard time understanding how people can love– really love– more than one person... not necessarily at once, but in a lifetime. He’s never felt anything like what he feels with me, with any other woman. He can’t fathom that he could.
“I’ve loved pretty deeply before, though,” she explains. “I really did love Lexi’s dad, with all my heart... but the timing was all wrong for us. We were both addicts when I first got pregnant. When I found out, I stopped using, cold turkey. I never gave it another thought. He quit with me, too, but eventually, he couldn’t stay away. It broke my heart to leave him, but I couldn’t bring her up in that environment.
“He’s clean now,” she adds, an almost bittersweet smile on her face. “He’s married and has another little girl. I still care about him a lot... but Steven and I don’t really talk about him. He just doesn’t understand. And I love Stevie very much, too much to make that an issue.
“So it’s nothing you did, Emi,” she says. “And he’ll like you, when he gets past that. I mean, I already can’t wait to be your sister-in-law.” She smiles, then her eyes get wide at her faux-pas. “I mean, if you two ever decide to... shit.”
Emi laughs nervously, avoiding eye contact with me. Of course it’s my intention to marry her.
“Show me what I’m supposed to do, Jackson,” she says to me, gesturing toward the small hills and beginning to hobble into the snow.
“I’m going to go watch the kids,” Renee says as she easily skis away.
“Alright, Poppet.” I help her out into a clear patch and begin to show her the basics.
I soon find that Emi’s not really a natural at skiing, but we have a fun time nonetheless in our own private lesson. I may have been too much of a distraction for her, but I couldn’t get the image of her from last night– this morning– out of my head, and I had a hard time keeping my hands off her. She didn’t seem to mind. She seemed to be having the same problem.
“If I’m this sore after bunny hills, I don’t think I’ll survive anything bigger,” Emi says as we enter the lodge.
“Are you sure it’s just the bunny hills?” I ask.
She glares at me through a smile. “Actually, no.”
“Go grab a seat on the couch, I’ll go get something warm to drink.” I watch Emi greet my parents as she takes a seat next to my dad. The girls and my youngest nephew sit on the floor around the coffee table, playing a board game. After I order a chai tea latte for Emi and a hot chocolate for myself, I wander to the small sundries shop while the barista prepares the drinks to get some ibuprofen and water.
I set down the pain reliever and water in front of Emi. She smiles and thanks me, quickly taking the pills. I return to the barista and pick up our hot beverages and take them back to the couch.
As soon as I sit down, my nephew runs to me and jumps in my lap. “Andy, you’re getting so big! How are you?”
“Fine,” he smiles.
“Where’s your brother?”
“Skiing.” He pushes out his lower lip.
“Oh, did you want to go?”
“All the adults are on the big slopes,” my mother says.
“I tell you what,” I suggest. “Let me drink this hot chocolate and then I’ll take you skiing. Is that okay?”
Andrew nods enthusiastically.
“Can we go, too, Uncle Jacks?” Maddie asks.
“You can all go,” I tell them. “And you can stay right here... or go back to the cabin, if you want,” I tell Emi.
“I’m good here,” she smiles. “Gives me some alone time with your mom and dad. Too bad they didn’t bring photo albums of you when you were a baby.”
“But we have tons of stories,” my dad says.
�
��I’m not sure I should leave,” I hesitate, joking with her.
“Oh, no, you’ve promised the kids,” Emi says. “You can’t back out now.”
“No, Uncle Jacks!” Maddie and Andy both cry.
“Alright,” I feign frustration, taking a sip of my drink. “Andy, do you remember Emi?” He nods and gives her a hug.
“Oh, thank you, Andy,” she says. “Lexi, how did you do out there?”
“I only fell once,” she says proudly. “I can’t wait to do it again.”
“You did better than me,” she tells Lexi. “I fell three times.”
“The secret is bending your knees,” Maddie tells Emi, as her friend nods.
“That’s what I told her,” I tell them. “She just kept standing like this.” I pass Andy off to Emi, who happily sits in her lap, and exaggerate a stance, sticking my butt out, making the kids laugh.
“It wasn’t that bad,” Emi argues, glaring, bouncing my nephew on her lap as he giggles.
“No, it was cute,” I tell her, kissing her forehead.
“Why didn’t Clara come?” Jackie asks.
“Clara’s home with her mommy,” she tells them. “She was really jealous, though. She even knows how to ski better than I do.”
“Maybe she can come next year,” I suggest. “Get Jen to come out, too. Chris and Anna will probably be too busy with the baby.”
“Is Chris having a baby?” my mother asks.
“Yes, Anna’s about half-way through the pregnancy,” Emi tells her. “They got pregnant right away... it was planned, though, or so they say.”
“Is he so excited?”
“They both are. We all are. We just found out it’s a boy.”
“That’s wonderful,” my dad says.
“Okay, kids,” I announce. “Who’s ready?”
“Me!” Maddie, Lexi and Andy all say in unison.
“Is it okay if I stay here?” Jackie asks.
“Sure, sweetie,” Emi says. “Come keep me company.” Jackie takes Andy’s place in Emi’s lap and plays with a doll she has with her. “What’s your baby’s name?” she asks my niece, raising her eyebrows and smiling at me as I put my coat back on. My mom helps to get the other three kids bundled up.
