I cough, hard. “You’re not a distraction, Ave.” I drop to one knee next to the bed, cupping her gorgeous hips in my hands and squeezing a little because I know she always gets sore muscles there from dancing. “You’re an incredible woman who has worked way too fucking hard all day to make everything perfect for everyone.” I drop my head and kiss her knee, just below the hem of her skirt where she got floor-burn falling during warm ups tonight. I get a touch of her cover up makeup on my lips and rub it away with the back of my hand as I look up at her. “I don’t want to be the next thing on your to-do list, okay?”
She flicks me in the collarbone, eyes narrowing. “Ditto. So let me seduce you already, asshole.”
A chuckle sticks uncomfortably behind my too-tight abs. “Uh...” What is a good way to tell one’s girlfriend that a nightcap quickie isn’t exactly on the repertoire when I’m so starved it’s going to take at least five in a row before I can think past my own hard-on? On the other hand, one with her would be a damn fine start to the two hours I’m going to have to spend behind the bathroom door with the videos on my phone muted.
She groans. “Fine, if you’re going to play all hard to get, then at least be a pal and help me wash my back. I think raising my arms right now might cause a hernia.”
“Done.” Doubts tug in the back of my mind, but she asked me to join her. That has to be good boyfriend behavior, right?
I’ve been avoiding the bus lately, because my band is one big reminder of everything in my life I don’t want to think about, but I’ve also been sneaking peeks into the romance books Jera and Kate brought along, searching for clues into the difference between a one-night man and the long-term one I want to be.
Ava stands up and unzips her leather tank down the front. She’s not wearing a bra, and the inner curves of her breasts sway softly as she turns to walk into the bathroom. She leaves the top on and her reflection in the mirror gives me front row seats to the way the edges flirt with her nipples.
My hand goes to my pants for an emergency adjustment as my belt threatens to cut off all circulation. But once it’s there, I can’t help a quick squeeze to my aching shaft. It’s crazy thick, like it’s just gotten bigger every day I’ve been unable to satisfy it. Panic feathers darkly against the edges of my thoughts.
What if I just can’t do monogamy?
The shower kicks on, the sound drawing me into the bathroom almost against my will. It feels dirty to satisfy this base urge with Ava, wrong to give her any glimpse at how close she drags me to losing all control. It sounds good in books, but in real life I don’t think she wants me to bend her over the back of a chair and fuck her until we’re both clawing for air. I’m afraid if I touch her once, that’s exactly what’s going to happen. She’s so fucking smart and talented, so much more than the killer body that she works so hard for because she knows it’s a marketing tool like anything else. Wanting it so bad feels like I’m no better than thousands of fanboys with one hand down their pants and one hand scrolling through her Instagram shots.
I round the doorway and she’s facing away from me, the delicate muscles of her back bare to the waist of her skirt as she pins up her hair. Her calves hard from the spike heels she’s still balanced on. I want my hand to disappear up that skirt, her legs flexing and squirming under my hold as I push inside her, everything I’m doing hidden behind the swish of fabric.
As if she’s having the same fantasy, she reaches under the skirt and tugs off her panties, bending to drag them down her long, long legs. When they catch on her heels, she kicks them away.
I start to sweat.
She glances back before checking the temperature of the shower spray inside the glass walls of the stall. “Watch out, it’s hot. Figured we’ve both got some sore muscles to work out.”
The side view of her breast is enough to give me an aneurism. If she turns an inch more I’ll see everything. My cock pulses in my pants, the fabric raking across swollen flesh.
She turns back to the shower, reaching for the zipper on her skirt. I press my palm over my erection, giving myself just enough pressure at the base that I think I can make it through the next moment without exploding. Christ on a camel, is she trying to kill me? Does she always striptease before showers? I try to remember, but I’m not entirely sure of the name of the planet we’re inhabiting right now, and the continent, country, and city are lost causes.
The skirt slides off the elegant line of her ass and I gulp. My vision hazes a little as she slips out of one shoe. Unclothed by the heavy metal heels she prefers, her feet are so tiny I always want to cradle them in my hands, like they need to be protected.
Ava gets into the glass shower, keeping her back to me. She’s normally chattier than this, even late at night. Is she doing this on purpose? Is she not turning around because she wants me to take her from behind? I’ve been trying to hide that it’s my favorite position, because it’s not very romantic. But if I can get her to spread her legs wide enough, I can hit this spot that makes her breath strangle in her throat, and it puts her clit perfectly within reach and...
“You gonna join me?”
I rip off my belt, my pants catching on my shoes as I shove off the whole mess. My abs pull fiercely from all the sit-ups I did this morning, but I don’t care. God, I can’t be near her right now. I need two or three girls, because there’s no way to contain every dirty thought I’m having in one body.
A button tears off as I yank my shirt over my head without unfastening it. I pull open the door to the shower, gripping the handle with all the scraps of my resolve. I can hold back enough to be sweet with her, gentle. I fucking can because if I scare her, I’ll never forgive myself.
Chapter 18: Insatiable
Ava turns around. Water runs down her chest, slowing at the rise of her breasts before dripping from her tight, small nipples. When she sees my face, she smiles. Without a word, she drops the body wash in my hand and turns around, the curve of her bottom sliding against my erection. Heat slams up through my hips and I fight not to pin her between me and the wet tile. My teeth creak under the pressure.
She reaches back to pat my thigh innocently, the muscle twanging as tight as marble. “Hurry up, sweetie. The hot water won’t hold out forever.”
I tilt the showerhead even more down, so I can be sure not to get her hair wet and create even more work for her tonight. I pour body wash into my palms as clumsily as if I’ve never seen the substance before, stroking it over her shoulders and rubbing my fingers in deep to soothe her overworked muscles. She moans lightly and arches into my touch, the change in position giving me a clear view down the front of her, water dripping down her flat stomach into the v off her thighs and the tiny strip of hair leading to...
I snap my eyes closed, but it only makes the texture of her skin more addicting, the curve of her neck more sensual.
“Mmm, Jax.” Her voice is a little plaintive, and I realize with a snap that this isn’t just about being a decent boyfriend, about not going caveman and railing her against this wall. It’s also that she has needs, too. Now that is a problem I can handle.
She leans back against me, her bottom just barely kissing the thrust of my cock. I can’t hold back the sound I make as I spin her to the far side of the shower, away from the spray of water.
I turn Ava to face me and hit my knees, my dick punching up between my spread thighs.
The first touch I give her is just a kiss, asking permission to go deeper. She squeaks and rolls against my mouth and I slide my tongue down the line of her until I can taste that she’s drenched from more than the shower. She’s slippery, a little swollen with desire just like I am. I close my eyes, lifting one of her thighs to rest on the muscle of my shoulder so I can go deeper. I want to be inside her, even if it’s only with my tongue.
I’ve got a full day’s growth of stubble going, and I’m careful with it, raking moans out of her with the change of texture, and using the softness of my lips on the most sensitive parts of her. The ins
ide of her upraised thigh gets raked as she strains closer, her heel jerking me toward her as my tongue ravishes. That one small part of me gets total freedom to do every filthy, unhinged thing I want.
If it’s only my tongue, I can’t hurt her, can’t ask too much.
The closer she gets to orgasm, the more tender I am, until her fists are pounding the tile behind her, and then I let her come. Once, and then again before she was quite finished with the first. My cock twitches with every drop of water that falls on it, my ears drinking her cries. As she quiets, she threads her fingers into my hair and holds it against her soft belly, her leg slipping off my shoulder. Before I realize what she’s doing, her fingernails come down and pinch my nipple.
My teeth snap together as I fight the thickening at the base of my cock, my head pounding. Ava’s taut nipples rake my chest and I don’t know if I stood up or she dropped down but then her nails bite into my buttocks like I just thrust into her. Vicious, and low enough that they are a hairsbreadth from my balls.
The first blast of my release takes me by surprise.
No, fuck, no I didn’t just... The second wave rips out of me before I can stop it, and then she’s gripping me and I’m coming all over her hand.
“Dammit, I’m sorry, I...”
Her tongue traces my shoulder and it’s hot and wet. My hips curl involuntarily.
“Come here,” she whispers.
When she tugs on my hand, my eyes come open and I realize we’re on our knees. She draws me to standing, her head below my chin now as she lays a kiss on the nipple that’s still raw from the pinch she gave me. She trails the pads of her fingers down my chest and the full length of me, the tip slippery from the last drops of my release. She rolls her thumb over it and I nearly choke. I reach out a shaking hand and turn off the shower, leaving the room quiet in the drifting clouds of steam.
“We should go to bed,” I whisper, nearly mad with wanting her. “You should sleep.”
Her chin comes up, her eyes flash, and she spins me, shoving me up against the wall of the shower. She grips my arm in some kind of karate hold and uses it to push me forward, crushing my cock against the cold tile. Fuck, that shouldn’t feel so good. My head is whirling with fatigue and all the things I should do and shouldn’t do and shouldn’t want and won’t do to her.
“You want to go to sleep?” she whispers, low and dangerous, coming up right behind me and curling her hips into mine so that the friction with the wall is utterly delicious. “You want that more than me?”
“God, no,” I groan.
“Good.” She trickles her nails up my inner thigh, a threat and a promise and I want it deeper, want her to draw blood. She flicks a teasing touch over my taint and then cups my balls and tugs lightly.
I consider finding religion.
“I’m not letting you go until you come all over yourself, you understand?” she growls. “So grit your teeth and bear it.” She dips her knees and slides her whole, gloriously naked body up mine. Her breasts tickling the curve of my back, her sleek abs over my wet buttocks, her knees parting to bracket my thighs in a tease of everything I can’t reach right now. She lets go of the arm she’s pinning and then she gasps a little.
I don’t know what she did to herself, but her nipples are painfully hard when she presses them into me again. I knock my forehead against the tile, panting.
“Let me turn around,” I beg. I could make her. God, barely a flex of my muscles and I could have her pinned in my place, but...I barely know anything right now, but I know that I’ll give her anything she wants. Her way, always, because mine can’t be trusted.
“No.” Her tiny, sleek body crashes into mine, rubbing until I can’t take the burn. My hips jerk involuntarily, driving my cock against unyielding tile. It hurts and it’s too wet to be enough friction and fuck, I’d pay every cent I own to...and then she curls her hips into mine. I can feel the tiny, swollen knot of her clit and I explode.
I yell as I hammer my dick into the tile, my hipbones cracking hard against the surface and come shooting slicker than water and steam between my stomach and the wall. Ava spins me and I see the flash of her smile before she rubs her hand over me, using the extra lubrication to slide across my still-clenching abs and down my pulsing shaft.
“If you’re not going to fuck me,” she whispers dangerously, “I’m going to fuck you.” She bends and—holy, holy God—her tongue traces the line of my abs down to my naval, tasting me and the mess I’ve made all over myself. Her lips part and smooth down my cock, devouring me like she can’t get enough.
My hips leap, jacking more of me into her mouth, rubbing against her tongue. Every good, decent part of me vanishes into a hiss of steam and satisfaction. I take her mouth, deep and brutal as her hands wrap around the back of my thighs, clenching and urging me on. My next orgasm rips through me, white hot and merciless before I throw her to the floor of the shower and fuck her like an animal, from behind. My knees crank hers wider and wider until she cries out, her inner walls fluttering around my cock, melting liquid approval all over me. I can’t help but stare, gripping her shoulder with one hand as I watch myself ream her, my cock coming out wetter every time I draw back for other thrust.
I should slow when she starts to moan her orgasm, but I can’t stop, can’t goddamn breathe or process. I think she comes twice, fisting around me and her leg muscles twitching. I flip her on her side and pull her leg up over my shoulder to give her a different angle. My thumb teases every secret from her clit as I clamp her wrists in my free hand so she can only moan and thrash her head from side to side.
A growl rises in my chest and claws free of my mouth as I hammer in one last time, shooting so deep inside of her that the panic doesn’t come until the third wave of my orgasm. Condom, where’s the condom?
I yank out, the last spurt hitting her thigh. “Shit, oh God, oh fuck.”
Ava laughs, deep and throaty. “Um, yeah.” She opens her eyes a bit, sees my expression, and shakes my grip off her wrists, shifting until she can sit up. “IUD, Jax.” She lays a hand against my thundering chest. “Breathe, sweetie. We talked about this, remember? You got tested, I have an IUD, it’s okay that we forgot the condom.”
I gulp air, only now registering the ache of my kneecaps against the hard floor. If my knees hurt, how must Ava’s feel? And her hipbones, her back, so much less cushioned by muscle than mine. Abruptly, I want to throw up. I shift back from her, my dick still standing up proud and wet, reddened from the friction. “Did I hurt you? Are you okay?”
She curls bonelessly onto her side, sagging into my chest and snuggling her head in close to me. “What button do I have to push to get you to do that again?”
I push her hair back from her face, but she’s not wincing, doesn’t seem to be in pain. I let out a slow, shaky breath and press a kiss to the top of her head, not shifting back for a long moment.
Her hand climbs my thigh until her fingers are toying around the thick base of me. “This button?” she asks, giving me a quick squeeze.
My heart trips over itself. She wants more, too? I reach back and crank off the shower, a smile tugging at the edges of my mouth. “Not sure. You probably better do it again.”
I climb to my feet, helping her up with me. I grab a towel and try to bundle her into it, but she keeps sneaking a hand out from underneath to grab my cock until I finally just laugh and thrust into her damp fist.
“You’re just dying for me to get the bed all wet, aren’t you?”
Her eyes gleam and she whirls and scampers away. I catch her just as she jumps into the bed, rolling her from one side to the other as I pull the blankets down around her, leaving just bare sheets.
She’s playful, still kind of wrestling with me, so I muscle her onto her back, spreading her arms out wide and holding them there until she stops struggling, gasping and smiling at me all at once. I steal a kiss from her, our lips sliding too quickly over each other like a tease I can’t get enough of.
“Hold on
,” I breathe, and she fists her hands in the sheets. I grin wickedly and slide down her body, wrapping my hands around her ankles and using them to push her knees back into her chest. I drop my head, my tongue more careful now because she’s sensitive from everything I’ve already done to her. This time I stop as soon as her hips start curling toward my mouth. I surge up over the top of her and enter in one smooth movement. The head of my dick swells, happy to be inside her again. I stroke slowly, watching her face, but there’s no hint of pain there so I reach between us and open her so I can curl into her clit with every stroke, angling my chest until I rake over her nipples, too.
She yanks the sheets clean off the mattress with my second stroke and I have to catch her hands, holding them wide so her breasts are open to me.
“Jax...” she whimpers.
I curl down over her, nibbling the inside curves of her breasts, teasing with my tongue and taking my time, enjoying the sweet grip of her around my dick. I never need to sleep, to eat, to think again. All I care about is drawing out her pleasure into slow peaks like ocean waves that close over our heads over and over and over again.
She tightens around me, moaning her pleasure. I try to back off, to make it last longer, but the hard balls of her heels clamp around my legs and she rises to meet me, fucking me even as I hold her down. This orgasm yearns up my cock, as slow as melting stone, inevitable as an earthquake. My whole body shakes, sweat beading on my face.
“Come,” Ava growls, biting my earlobe. “Harder than that. Come on, give me more.”
My hips snap forward, and I drive her into the mattress with more force than I should, overwhelming her tiny body until my cock swells and something breaks free at the base of my spine, rippling molten up my body.
I collapse on top of her, my arms useless, my abs torched, the muscles in my ass cramping into hard knots. Ava slings an arm around my neck and sighs happily. “Christ, I am never leaving this bed again.” She shifts underneath me and winces. “Which is convenient because walking is probably out of the question.”
Insatiable (Sex, Love, and Rock & Roll Book 3) Page 19
