Joe walked up to my side. “Yep,” he added.
“But, but, I’ve seen twelve year-olds. They are way bigger than me. Zac is twelve and he is way, WAY bigger. You two are so much smaller.”
I grinned and lowered my head. I looked up at him. “Yeah, that’s because my mom is an inventor and she invented a shrink ray.”
“She shrank you because you were bad. Yikes!” Bobby said.
“No, no, remember the phone call we asked you to make. Mom didn’t do this to us on purpose. My mom is really nice.”
“She is,” Joe added.
“We turned the shrink ray on ourselves by accident, we didn’t mean to shrink ourselves.”
Bobby held his stomach laughing. “Ha, that is so funny! You guys are so dumb.”
Yep, that’s what my life had come down to, being laughed at by a five-year-old. A five-year-old who we really needed to depend on. “We made a mistake,” I replied quietly.
“A really dumb mistake,” Joe added.
“Now we need you to be a brave knight in shining armor and keep us safe until my mom can get here!” I said boldly.
Bobby scratched his chin. “I can do that. I’m brave and smart.” He stopped and looked down on us. “What do I get for helping you? You did promise me wishes.”
I held up a finger. “We can’t grant you wishes, but we can give you reward money. Joe and I have some in our piggy banks and it’s yours once we get big again.”
“How do I know I can trust you?” Bobby asked.
“He does have a point,” Joe said.
I shot Joe a look. He sunk back. I turned to Bobby. I made a cross against my chest with my finger. “Cross my heart,” I told him as sincerely as I could. I really meant it. If Joe and I were going to get back to normal without being squashed, right now Bobby was our best bet. We certainly wouldn’t be able to get out of this tree fort without him.
“You have a deal,” Bobby said.
“Bobby! Did you steal my little people?” We heard Meg yelling from down below.
Chapter 5
All right, we had a predicament. Bobby had stolen us from his big sister Meg, who had stomach issues. Only now, Meg had recovered and seemed less than pleased with Bobby. Sure, we weren’t promising the kids magic, but we had promised them cash. Of course, now they both wanted to help us.
“Bobby! “ Meg yelled up. “I know you stole my little people!”
“Did not!”
“Did too!”
“Did not not!!”
“Did too!!”
“Did not not not!!”
“Did too!!!”
“Did not not not not!!”
“Did too!!!!”
“Did not not not not not!!”
“Did too!!!!!”
As this stimulating conversation kept going back and forth, Joe turned to me. “Ah, what are your thoughts on Zac now?”
“He’s not quite as perfect as I thought. But nobody is perfect. In a way, that makes him more appealing to me. He’s more approachable. I mean come on, he’s still the best-looking guy at school. Doesn’t matter if he’s not perfect. I just wish he didn’t spend so much time on the phone with those OTHER GIRLS. I mean, what do they have...that I don’t have? Okay, maybe one or two of them might be slightly better built for now. For now, mind you! I’m sure…”
“I meant about having Zac rescue us,” Joe sighed.
“Oh,” I said, giggling nervously. “I’m against it.”
Joe groaned. “Man, Bella I’m having trouble keeping up with you. Remember how you thought this could be a good bonding moment for you and Zac. He gets to be the hero. Guys love being the hero and saving the girl in distress.”
I nodded. “Yes, that’s if the girl is pretty and smells good and stuff. Guys are shallow, even the deepest of them. I don’t want him saving me if I look and smell like this. I’d rather be small forever.”
Joe groaned louder. “Really?”
I pointed at Bobby. “Besides, we have Bobby and Meg fighting over us. I have complete faith in them.”
Joe leaned into me and whispered, “Ah, have you noticed Bobby isn’t very swift. I’m not sure I want my fate in the hands of somebody who doesn’t know when to wipe their nose.”
“Well then, we have Meg. Meg is pretty sharp. I mean she knew who I was.”
Joe looked down and away from me. “Yeah, I’m not sure I trust Meg. She seems a bit all over the place. She’s either hyper or too smart for our own good. I think she’d sell us out first chance she got.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Like how? Do you expect her to get a better deal from a couple of other kids who accidentally shrunk themselves?”
“You got me there,” Joe said. “Still, she scares me. They both do. Plus, our faith is in Becky’s hands. If we go to Zac, he can deliver us to your house,” Joe said appealing to my common sense.
“That’s a good point, and I’ll think about it. But for now, we have Bobby and Meg.”
Currently, Bobby was leaning over the edge of the tree house and spitting at Meg.
“Oh Bobby, that is so gross!” Meg scolded.
“I don’t have the two little people,” Bobby said. “And even if I did, I wouldn’t give them to you. They’re my little people! I’m going to help them. I’m going to get the money. I will be rich!!” He laughed and laughed.
A stone flew up into the tree house.
“Ha! Missed me!” Bobby shouted.
He turned and farted out the tree house.
Another stone flew up.
Joe pointed at Bobby. “You sure about this, Bella?”
“Of course I’m not!” I shouted. “I’m not sure of much anymore. I’m just sure I hate being two inches tall and smelling of milk and sweat and hamster poo.”
“I think the hamster poo got washed off,” Joe said.
“Still, those scents stick with you,” I said.
“Okay then,” Joe said slowly. “Zac is out of the question for now. So our safety is in the hands of either Bobby or Meg.”
“For now Joe, yes.”
Joe put a finger to his mouth. He removed the finger from his mouth when he realized he had done that. “That was gross,” he said. He shook out his body. “Okay, I’ve collected my thoughts.”
“Good to know.”
“Have you heard the saying two heads are better than one?” Joe asked.
“Nope,” I said, straight faced.
Joe’s eyes popped open. “Really? It’s a pretty famous saying.”
“Joe, I’m just messing with you!”
“Right,” he laughed. “I knew that; I was just playing with you.” He stood there.
“Where are you going with this two heads thing? We’ve already been working together as a team. So far with mixed results,” I noted.
“No, no, no, not us,” he pointed at Bobby, “them!”
“Them?”
“Bobby and Meg! We need them to work together,” Joe insisted.
I looked over at Bobby, he had his butt in the air leaning over the edge of the tree house, still trying to force out another fart. Yeah, I’m not sure we wanted our lives in his hands. “I think in their case, putting Bobby and Meg’s brains together, might just equal one brain.”
“Exactly!” Joe said. “Bobby isn’t the brightest kid, even for a five-year-old. But I trust him. Meg is sharp, but she’s also hyper and well, she may be a little evil. But together…”
“Together they make the dream team!” I said.
“Well maybe not the dream team, but a better team,” Joe told me. “I’d still prefer Zac since well, he does have a brain and can take us to your mom.”
I didn’t really hear Joe. I kind of did but didn’t pay attention. I knew he made a good point but I wasn’t ready for that point yet. I walked over towards Bobby. He had now given up trying to fart down on Meg. Instead, he stuck his tongue out, “Nah, Nah, Nah! I have the fairies and you don’t! Nah, Nah, Nah.”
“If you have them and I don’
t, how do you know I’m not trying to trick you?” Meg countered.
Bobby took a step back. He scratched his head. He scratched his butt. I had to make sure he picked up Joe with that hand, not me. He picked his nose with the same hand. Nope, definitely did not want him touching me with that hand. He leaned over the tree house entrance. “I’m just smart like that.” He pointed to his head. “Maybe I have ESPN!” he shouted to her.
“Ah, it’s ESP,” I told him.
“Oh I mean, I have EPS!” Bobby shouted.
“Huh?” Meg said.
“I mean PES!” Bobby said. “No wait, SPE…”
I leaned over the edge and waved down to Meg. I cupped my hand to my mouth and called down to her, “Yeah, he has us up here. He nabbed us when you were in the bathroom. Insisted he was doing us a favor.”
Meg actually turned a little red. “Ah, um, yeah he might have been. That Mall Sushi sticks with you and then it's gross.”
Bobby looked at me. He stomped his foot. “Why’d you tell her?”
I didn’t get to answer because the force of Bobby’s stomp propelled me out of the tree house.
“Oops,” Bobby said.
“Bella!” Joe shouted.
As I slowly fell to what I thought could very likely be my death...my mind raced with these thoughts…OMG, I’m going to die! This is going to be the most embarrassing death ever. Knocked from a tree fort by a five-year-old after being shrunk to two inches. I’ll be an internet meme; a meme that stands for being really, REALLY DUMB!
I floated downwards. I flapped my arms. Not sure why. I guess I hoped it would slow the fall and leave me less damaged. I saw an open palm reaching up to me.
“Don’t worry, I’m star catcher on my softball team!” Meg told me.
I landed safely in her open palm. I breathed a big sigh of relief. Looking up, I could see that Joe and Bobby also seemed happy. I turned to Meg. “Maybe you and Bobby can work together on this?”
Meg called up to Bobby. “Bobby let’s talk about this.”
Bobby bent over and picked up Joe. “Now we each have our own little person!” he shouted.
Well, I guess this was some progress.
Chapter 6
,
I was in the mostly safe hands of Meg. Of course, Joe was now alone in Bobby’s hands. I knew this wouldn’t go well for Joe, being split from me and trusting his life to Bobby. The good news for Joe was that Bobby wasn’t holding him with the hand he’d itched his butt and picked his nose with. Of course, that wouldn’t matter if Bobby dropped him.
“Look, Meg, I appreciate the catch, but I think it would be best if you and Bobby teamed up on this.”
Meg pointed to Bobby who was now shaking his butt at us and then spinning around and sticking his tongue out at us. He alternated between the two. “You want me to team with that?” she asked. “Bad enough I have to live with him. Our dog has more sense than he does and smells better too.”
“Look, I have a little sister I know what a pain in the butt little siblings can be!”
“Hey! I’m a little sister too!” Meg shouted. “I’m cursed from both sides. I’m trapped between a younger smelly brother and an older bigger just as smelly brother!” Meg told me.
“Oh, I can’t believe Zac smells bad!” I said, losing a bit of the point.
“Please, Mom says his socks have to be registered as a deadly weapon. If he wants to be alone in the room, he farts. Sometimes he thinks deodorant is optional…”
I held up a hand. “Okay, I get the point, he’s not perfect.”
“That’s another thing. He probably can’t even spell the word perfect. He’s a terrible speller.”
I nodded. “Yeah well, we all have auto correct on our phones and computers these days so it’s not a big deal.”
Meg looked at me. “Why aren’t you interested in his best friend, Henry Edmans?”
“Who?” I asked.
Meg rolled her eyes. “Henry Edmans, messy brown hair. He likes to sing, has a really good voice. He doesn’t smell nearly as bad as Zac and he’s fun!”
“That’s the kid who’s always hanging out with Zac,” I said. “He’s too short for me.”
Meg tilted her head. “Really?”
“I’m not normally two inches tall!” I reminded her.
Meg laughed. “Yes, I’m not Bobby, I get that. But you’re not a giant either. I don’t see a career in basketball for you. BTW, Zac loves basketball, it’s the one thing he’s actually good at.”
“I know that!” I said proudly. “I go to all the games. I was thinking about becoming a cheerleader.”
“Really?” Meg asked.
“Yeah, except I can’t tumble, and my voice is a little soft, and the school colors don’t look very good on me.”
Meg shook her head. “You really should consider Henry.”
“Look, Meg, I appreciate your help, but I’m not going to take life advice from an eight-year-old.”
Meg raised her arm. “Well, I guess I should just toss you back to Bobby!”
“No! No! I mean love life advice!” I said quickly.
Meg lowered me to her face. “Remember, you’re the one who’s two inches tall and needs me!”
“Right,” I answered, with a firm nod of my head.
“Are you girls done talking?” Bobby called down to us.
“For now,” Meg replied.
“Yes, for now,” I agreed.
“So Bobby, little Bella here wants us to work together,” Meg called up to him.
Bobby closed one eye and opened the other one wide. “Who’s Bella?” He laughed. “Such a funny name.”
“I’m Bella,” I called, waving from Meg’s hand.
“And I’m Joe,” Joe told Bobby.
“Now that’s a normal name,” Bobby grinned. The grin faded. “Wait, fairies have names?”
Joe sighed.
I slapped my hand to my forehead.
Meg laughed. “You sure you want me to team with THAT?”
I nodded. “Sadly, I do.”
“Hey, I can hear everything!” Bobby shouted down to us.
“Yeah, the acoustics are really good!” Joe sighed.
“I don’t want to team with Meg anyhow! She’ll try to take my part of the reward. She thinks she’s so smart just because she’s older, can tie her shoes and doesn’t wet the bed.” He tossed a hand over his mouth. “Oops, forget I said that last one.”
“Forget what?” Joe replied, playing along.
“That I wet the bed, silly!” Bobby said, leaning into him. He stopped and hit himself in the head again. “I did it again. I said I wet the bed again. Ah, I did it again.” He stomped.
“Please, help me,” Joe pleaded down to us.
Yes, sir, I needed a plan to unite Meg and Bobby. After all, these two had to have SOMETHING in common. Some goal they each shared. I mean, come on, they lived in the same house. They were brother and sister. There had to be some link I could use.
“I don’t want to work with Meg!” Bobby insisted. “She treats me almost as bad as Zac.”
Pausing to think for a minute, he added, “But I guess at least she never farts in my face.”
“That’s true, I don’t,” Meg said.
THAT was it. THAT was their bond. They both wanted to show up ZAC! I, for one, believe that Zac would never fart in anybody’s face. At least, not unless he was provoked. I could see Bobby getting on his nerves. After all, I’d only been around Bobby an hour or so and he was already driving me batty. I bet he farted on Zac, and Zac realized the only way to get rid of him was a self-defense fart. But I had gotten off-track. I needed to use Zac to get these two to work together. I could do that.
“You guys know what your brother Zac would really hate?”
“A more handsome boy moving next door? Showering more often? Having to take a math or spelling test?” Meg said.
“Broccoli!” Joe said. “Oh no, I’m the one who hates broccoli. Zac hates sushi. So…sushi!”
&n
bsp; “Well, those are all good answers, but what would really drive Zac crazy is if you two worked together to save us. And then got a big reward from my mom, the famous and rich scientist!”
“How big?” Meg asked.
“If she’s famous, how come she doesn’t have a TV show?” Bobby asked.
I looked at Meg. “A hundred dollars each.”
Yeah, I kind of picked a number that sounded good. I didn’t have that kind of money but I knew Mom would surely be glad to pay that.
“I like that number,” Meg said.
I looked up to Bobby. “My mom doesn’t like to brag on TV. But if she does ever get a show, I know she’ll have you on it.”
“And not Zac?” Bobby asked.
“Nope, no Zac!”
Bobby kicked the rope ladder. It fell down the length of the tree. Bobby grabbed the ladder and slid down it, holding the ladder in one hand, Joe in the other.
Bobby hit the ground in less than a second. Joe looked greener than a bean.
“Oh, I just barfed a bit in my mouth,” Joe moaned.
“Cool,” Bobby said.
Okay, I now had Bobby and Meg working together. We could do this. I just needed to figure out the best way to proceed from here.
Chapter 7
After a couple of minutes, Joe’s face returned to its regular pasty white color. I gave him a little pat on the back.
“You okay, buddy?” I asked.
He looked up at me and smiled. “Yeah. Being alone with Bobby was way scary. He’s a good kid...but a bit crazy.”
Meg walked over to us. “Okay, how do we get you two home and unshrunk?”
I looked around at all the birds in the trees. It may have been my imagination but I swear they were all looking at Joe and me as if we were their next meal. Not only that, being this small seemed to make the sun seem extra hot. I pointed to the kitchen. “I think we’d be safer inside.”
“Okay,” Meg said.
“But I like being outside!” Bobby whined. “Mom always says we need fresh air!”
“So now you decide to listen to Mom?” Meg said to Bobby.
He took a step back. He put his hands behind his back. “Well, I like to listen to Mom when I think she’s right.”
Zac to the Rescue! Page 3
