by Lucy Clark
‘I think she’s already playing with the other children out the back in the sandpit.’ Harriette finished setting things up for him before heading next door into her own consulting room to do the same.
‘But how do I know she’s going to be supervised properly? What if she decides to run away out here?’ Felix had followed her, clearly anxious.
‘Then you’d best go talk to her, set down some guidelines and find out who’s in charge of looking after the children and let Chloe know.’ Harriette could quite easily have taken over but that wasn’t the way for Felix to learn. ‘Communication, in any relationship, is paramount.’
‘Right. Right. Good. Talk to Chloe. I can do that. Thanks,’ he returned, and as he disappeared from her view she couldn’t help but smile at the progress he’d made in such a short time. At least now he was more than willing to talk to Chloe, to interact with the little girl and to ensure that her safety came first.
‘Doc?’ There was a knock at her open door and when she looked up it was to find a man in his late thirties standing there with an old towel wrapped around his hand. ‘I’ve just arrived and the blokes outside said I could jump the queue.’
Harriette nodded and ushered him in, closing the door. Clinic time had clearly begun whether she liked it or not, and as she unwrapped the towel she discovered a fencing nail going into the man’s hand.
‘Here we go,’ she whispered beneath her breath as she gathered together the supplies she would need. She treated her patient, giving him a local anaesthetic before removing the nail. She debrided the wound and then packed and dressed it.
‘You’ll need to have the dressing changed regularly for the next three weeks. I’ll put you on the district nurses’ roster but when they can’t make it to you, you’ll either need to get to Meeraji Lake or to Darwin.’ Harriette tried to smother a yawn as she spoke.
‘You all right, Doc?’
‘Just a bit tired from driving this morning. It’ll settle down.’ She started to write up the case notes for her patient, then asked him to send in the next person.
‘How are you going?’ Harriette asked Felix a few hours later as they stopped for a drink of cool iced tea.
‘Getting through them. There’s such a variety of problems. I hadn’t expected that.’
She clinked her glass with his and grinned. ‘Far more exciting than your average hospital clinic, right?’
Felix pondered her words for a moment, which only made her smile increase. ‘What are you smiling at?’ he asked, giving her that cute little quizzical smile.
‘You.’
‘What about me?’
‘You like to really ponder things before you speak or make a decision and that’s great.’
He nodded and leaned on the kitchen bench as a few of the older kids who were around the place came hurtling through. Harriette stepped forward in order to get out of the way and when she next looked at Felix, she realised just how close they were. ‘And you, Harriette, like to say whatever it is that comes into your mind.’
‘Hey. I do think things through. Perhaps I just think faster than you.’
He angled his head to the side and regarded her for a moment; she wished he hadn’t, especially as his gaze dipped to take in the shape of her mouth, lingering there a second too long before returning to look into her eyes. Didn’t he realise how he was affecting her? How that long look had brought a mass of tingles to flood through her body, had caused a wanting heat to wash over her?
She tried to return her thoughts to an even keel, to ignore the way he was making her feel. Theirs was a relationship that would remain professional and platonic, with her helping him to learn how to parent Chloe. She could accept that, but if she was to get through the rest of this year, working alongside Felix, living in the same house as him, seeing him become a wonderful father—as she’d already glimpsed—then she needed to find a way to keep her emotion under control. There would be countless more times when they would need to be this close, where the heat from their bodies would be combining together, where their scents would blend to become one heady concoction of desire.
She breathed out, trying not to look at his mouth but failing miserably, and what she saw there were his lips curved into a small smile. She looked at his eyes and saw one eyebrow raised in a teasing but very interested manner.
‘You were saying?’
‘Uh...’ Harriette tried desperately to think of what she’d been saying, of what her last thought was, but all she could remember was how much she wanted him to kiss her again.
‘You think faster than I do?’ he continued to tease and she realised he knew full well that their present closeness was having a devastating effect on her equilibrium.
‘Stop teasing me, Felix.’ Her words were soft, intimate and meant only for him.
‘Or what?’ he challenged.
‘Or I may shut you up by kissing you.’
His smile increased, which only disarmed her more. She’d half expected him to take a step back at her words, to put some distance between them, to become uncomfortable at her straightforward speaking. ‘I can think of worse punishments,’ he countered, his gaze once more dipping to take in her mouth.
Harriette sighed with repressed desire and clenched her jaw to stop herself from leaning forward and following through on her threat. ‘Why are you doing this to me? You were the one who said we shouldn’t get involved, that we needed to think of Chloe, that you didn’t want me undermining—’
Felix placed a finger over her lips to stop her from talking, the touch causing her to gasp, the desire buzzing through her magnifying. ‘Perhaps I was...a bit hasty. Perhaps we should—’
He broke off as the owner of the homestead came into the kitchen and he immediately dropped his hand but didn’t ease back, still leaning casually on the bench. Harriette was the one to straighten, to take a step back, to try not looking guilty at being caught in an intimate tête-à-tête.
‘Find everything you need?’ Paulette asked them.
‘Yes, thank you,’ Felix answered as he took another sip of his long, cool drink. ‘Harriette and I were just discussing a few of the patients,’ he offered, as though explaining why they’d been standing so close. ‘As this is my first outback homestead clinic, I needed to clarify a few things.’
‘Fair enough,’ Paulette responded. ‘Now, I’ve had a few problems with people needing to stay the night and the fact is that I’ve run out of beds. Harriette, I had you and Chloe in the last room at the end of the corridor. There’s a double bed in there but, Felix, I don’t have anywhere for you to sleep. A lot of the men are dossing down in the lounge room but they’ve all got sleeping bags with them. Some are sleeping outside in their swags but at the moment the only real bed I have left is the one Harriette and Chloe will be sharing.’
‘What?’ It was Harriette who reacted. ‘None of the couches are free?’
Paulette shook her head. ‘I didn’t think it right to assign poor Felix to a space on the floor or to a couch, given you’ve both got to do a clinic first thing in the morning, plus you’ve been driving. You’re both going to be exhausted and—’
‘It’s no problem,’ Felix stated, finishing his drink and taking the glass to stack in the dishwasher. ‘Harriette and I can share with Chloe in the middle of us. She’ll love that.’ He smiled at Paulette. ‘You’re doing a great job dealing with the gaggle of people here.’
Paulette seemed taken aback at his praise and smiled warmly at him. ‘Oh. Well, thank you.’ She actually fanned her face. ‘How lovely of you to say so.’ She glanced at Harriette. ‘I can see why he’s considered the new catch of the county. Luckily I’m a happily married woman.’
Harriette drained her glass of its contents and went to put it into the dishwasher but Felix took it from her and performed the task. The last thing she wanted was to be
discussing how Felix was bachelor of the year; to listen to the gossip that was no doubt already spread right around the district, especially when she’d been contemplating kissing him again.
‘Right. Back to work.’ With that, she left Felix and Paulette in the kitchen and called her next patient through into her makeshift consulting room. How she managed to get through the rest of the patients scheduled for that evening, she had no clue. With the way he’d looked at her in the kitchen, with the way he’d placed his finger over her lips, causing her breathing to increase and her senses to become even more heightened, it was enough to make her hyperventilate by just thinking about it.
How on earth was she supposed to sleep the entire night in the same bed as him? Of course, from a practical point of view, it was the best solution. They would both get to sleep on a comfortable mattress and awake refreshed in the morning, ready for the next clinic, but, to own the truth, being that close to Felix—all night long—especially with the way he was making her feel, meant she doubted she’d get any sleep whatsoever.
She could always go and sleep in the ute. It would be uncomfortable but she was sure she would actually get more shut-eye than she would being so close and yet so far from Felix. How was it that this man had somehow commandeered every aspect of her thoughts—except for the medical professional part? She’d managed to get her thoughts in order, to simply be colleagues with Felix, to be friendly but to keep her distance, to help him with Chloe. That was all she’d been planning to do for the next year and, hopefully, somewhere in the process of denying herself, she would find a level of compatibility with Felix where they could lose the awkward awareness of each other and achieve a companionable existence.
Not any more!
CHAPTER TEN
BY THE TIME the patients had all been seen and Paulette’s husband had barbecued an enormous amount of food to feed those who had come for the clinic or were staying the night, Harriette had to admit she was exhausted.
People were still chatting and eating and drinking, some were leaving to head back to their homes, others were already asleep on the floor in their sleeping bags. With Chloe starting to look as though she would fall asleep at any given moment, Harriette picked the little girl up from where she’d been playing with one of her new friends, and carried her towards where Felix was chatting with a few of the patients he’d treated that day.
It was good to see him mixing with the locals where she’d half expected him to keep himself aloof, separate, superior. He watched her walk towards him, Chloe’s head resting on her shoulder.
‘Do you want me to take her?’ he asked, putting his glass of iced tea down on a nearby table.
‘It’s fine. I’m happy to put her to bed tonight, if that’s OK with you.’
A mild look of relief crossed his face and she realised that he hadn’t wanted Chloe to have one of her tantrums when she was eventually put to bed. ‘Thanks.’
That was all she needed, his permission—because there was no way she wanted to be accused of overstepping the mark once again. With a smile and a brief nod in his direction, Harriette headed back to the homestead, where she quickly brushed Chloe’s teeth and then got her ready for bed, glad their bags had been put into the room. Once Chloe was settled, Harriette found herself yawning profusely and decided she would follow suit. She doubted anyone would miss her if she went to bed now. Besides, if she could fall asleep with Chloe before Felix came to bed, then she wouldn’t have to think about him lying next to her.
After doing her teeth, changing into her pyjamas and plaiting her hair so it didn’t get in the way, Harriette climbed between the cool sheets, the little girl instantly snuggling in and wrapping her arms around Harriette’s neck. The action helped Harriette to relax, loving the sensation of having a child sleeping next to her. It reminded her of those times when Eddie had had bad dreams, or had just wanted to have a ‘sleepover’ in mummy’s bed. Her little boy. Her precious little boy who was now such an incredible young man, but in her eyes he would be her little boy for ever.
Which was why she was astonished by the sensation of feeling as though Chloe were her little girl. Since they’d met, she’d been amazed with the way the child made her feel, heightening her dormant maternal instincts. She loved playing with the toys, reading the stories, engaging the imagination, especially during their tea parties. Even though Harriette had been focusing on her career, she’d been desperate to do that because she’d needed to ensure she had a life once Eddie had left her. Now that he was actually living on the other side of the world, she’d needed to surround herself with people, to become a part of a new community, but what she hadn’t counted on was Felix.
Felix had changed everything. Not only had he brought Chloe into her life, but he’d raised dormant feelings, ones she hadn’t expected to cope with. Before, when he’d been flirting with her in the kitchen, every sense in her body had been heightened and on red alert...alert in case he actually followed through on the desire she’d clearly seen in his eyes.
He was confusing her. He’d told her he didn’t want to start a relationship with her and she’d respected his wishes, sorted her head out and decided to make this trip one of friendship and fun. Now, he was saying he’d made a mistake, that he wanted to see where things might lead...or was he? She had no idea because tomorrow he could change his mind again, if he so chose, and then where would she be?
‘It’s too confusing, Chloe,’ she whispered to the sleeping child. ‘I like him. I really do. I like him a lot. He makes me think, he makes me feel and he makes me want more for the life that I’ve tried to plan for myself.’ Surprisingly, as she whispered the words into the dark quiet room, Harriette found her eyes starting to fill with tears.
‘I wanted the “happily ever after” ending all those years ago and I didn’t get it, so I never let myself think about it again. I had Eddie and that was enough but now he’s gone...he’s gone, Chloe, he’s left me, and...and...’ She stopped, knowing there was no point in upsetting herself. If she allowed her thoughts to continue down this path, she would end up crying herself to sleep and no doubt wetting poor Chloe in the process. Deep down inside, Harriette had always wanted the normalcy of what society at large called ‘a family’. Two parents raising children together.
‘Little girl,’ she continued to whisper after a moment, her words less broken than before. ‘You have brought laughter and sunshine into my life.’ And so has your uncle, she added silently, and as she listened to the child’s even breathing Harriette found herself drifting off to sleep, thoughts of Felix mixing with her dreams, dreams of the two of them walking along hand in hand, teasing each other, working alongside each other at the hospital. She pictured not only herself and Felix, together, as a couple, but also with Chloe and Eddie, the four of them making up a mix-and-match of a family but a family nevertheless.
* * *
Felix had been well aware that when Harriette had gone to put Chloe to bed, she hadn’t returned. He knew because he’d been looking for her, scanning the gathered group of people for a glimpse of her beautiful face. As he finally said his goodnights and went to the room assigned to them, he found exactly where Harriette had disappeared to.
How long he stood there by the bed, watching the two sleeping females who had become so important to him in such a short time, he had no idea. Chloe was lying on her back, one arm up above her head, the other almost across Harriette’s face. Harriette lay on her side, one protective arm curled around the little girl, both of them breathing deeply. He wasn’t at all surprised Harriette had been so exhausted, given that she’d driven the entire way to the homestead and then done a clinic on top of that.
She made a little noise, a little sighing sound and a small smile tugged at her lips. A buzz of protective desire flooded through him and he couldn’t help recall the moment they’d shared in the kitchen earlier in the day. He’d wanted to kiss her a
gain, wanted to see whether the chemistry from the first time had been a fluke or whether it was real. If it was the real deal, if his growing feelings towards Harriette continued to soar, what would happen then? His life had already been derailed once. Would it matter if it was derailed a second time?
The possibility of a different future, one he’d never considered before—a future of him, Chloe and Harriette, along with Eddie...together as a family—made him tremble with longing. He quickly turned away from the vision of loveliness in the bed and went to brush his teeth. When he returned and contemplated getting into the bed with Harriette so near and yet so far, he felt it better to sleep fully clothed. It was a warm night and he didn’t really need covers so, instead, he lay down on top of the bed and tried to relax. He listened to Harriette’s and Chloe’s even breathing and slowly...very slowly, he drifted off to sleep as exhaustion caught up with him.
* * *
A loud scream of delight pierced Harriette’s dream world and she woke with a start. ‘Chloe!’ Her eyes were wide open and every muscle in her body was tense. Chloe wasn’t in the bed at all. In fact, no one was in the bed with her. She was all alone but she could see the dint Felix’s head had made on the pillow, which indicated he had actually come in and slept. She didn’t remember at all.
Harriette stared at the pillow for a second before picking it up and smelling it. Yes. It smelt like him, that spicy hypnotic scent that had often excited her senses. Realising she was being foolish, she returned the pillow and searched around for her cellphone in order to check the time.
She was still looking for her phone when the door to the room opened and Chloe came running in, clambering onto the bed and bouncing on her knees. ‘Wake up. Wake up.’
‘I’m awake,’ Harriette told her, slipping one hand around the little girl and relaxing at seeing she was all right.
‘Uncle Felix! She’s awake!’
‘Excellent,’ he remarked as he came in behind Chloe carrying a tray of food. ‘Sit up, Dr Jones, as breakfast is served.’
