by Kitty Neale
‘I’d rather go home.’
Pearl slumped against the wall, relieved when shortly after Emma returned with both their coats. ‘Oh, you don’t have to leave too.’
‘You’re upset, and my mother would skin me alive if I let you go home on your own. There’ll be other nights for dancing and, anyway, I’ve already told my friends I’m leaving.’
‘Did … did they hear what Kevin said?’
‘No, they were well out of earshot.’
Pearl sighed with relief. They spoke little on the way home, and when they arrived Mo looked at them with surprise. ‘You’re early, and what’s the matter, Pearl? Your mascara’s run and you look like you’ve been crying.’
It was Emma who answered. ‘Kevin Dolby upset her. She turned him down so he called her a tart.’
Mo’s lips tightened. ‘I’ll see that Dolly hears about this.’
‘Please don’t tell her,’ Pearl cried. ‘She’ll sack me, you know she will.’
‘Yeah, you’re probably right. Kevin can do no wrong in Dolly’s eyes. All right, I won’t say anything, and as I’ve said to my Emma, keep away from Kevin. He’s nothing but trouble.’
‘I … I think I’ll look for another job.’
‘You could do that, but if you like working in the café it doesn’t seem fair. Why don’t you hold your hand and if Kevin gets funny again, I can back you up?’
Pearl shook her head, unable to tell them the truth and instead blurting out, ‘No, I don’t want you to do that. Anyway, as you said, Dolly wouldn’t believe us and she’d turn on you too.’
‘Don’t let that nasty sod chase you out of your job,’ Emma said. ‘If Mum can’t back you up, then I will.’
Pearl’s heart ached. Emma and Mo were being so nice. They were indignant with Kevin on her behalf, yet she didn’t deserve their support. She had slept with Kevin Dolby and what would they think of her if they knew the truth? Would they label her a tart too? With a forced smile she said, ‘Thank you, and I’ll think about it, but I’ve got a bit of a headache and I’d like to go to bed now.’
Both Mo and Emma smiled at her sympathetically, but when Pearl climbed into bed she laid awake, gazing up at the ceiling. She was a fool, a complete and utter fool. She’d been determined to keep away from Kevin, yet one smile from his handsome face and, like an idiot, she had melted. Why? She knew what he was like: one minute charming, the next vicious and cruel, yet it hadn’t stopped her from almost falling into his arms.
His words rang in her mind and she was unable to hide from the truth any longer. Yes, she did think about the night they made love, and he was right, she did want him. He had aroused such wonderful feelings, ones that she yearned to feel again.
Pearl flushed with shame, filled with self-disgust as she turned onto her side and pulled the blankets up to her chin.
The following morning Pearl awoke after a restless night, and as memories of the previous evening flooded her mind, she dressed despondently before making her way downstairs.
‘Happy birthday,’ Mo and Emma chorused as she walked into the kitchen.
‘Oh, thank you. How did you know?’
‘Derek told us, and here you are, love,’ Mo said, handing her a package and envelope.
‘And this is from me,’ Emma added as she did the same.
Pearl felt overwhelmed, her heart lifting as she opened her cards. She blinked rapidly as she read the lovely words and, gulping, opened her packages. There was a smart wide black patent belt from Mo, and a make-up bag containing mascara, powder and lipstick from Emma. ‘They’re lovely. Thank you so much.’
‘Emma chose the belt,’ Mo said. ‘With winter on its way I wanted to get you a nice warm scarf.’
‘Leave it out, Mum. She’d rather have the belt. I’m right, ain’t I?’ Emma said, grinning widely at Pearl.
‘Oh, yes, it’s just what I wanted. And the makeup’s wonderful too.’
‘Right, let’s have some breakfast,’ Mo said, beginning to bustle around. ‘It’s my treat today so you’ll be having more than cereals, Pearl. In fact, I was thinking about our eating arrangements last night. I wondered if you’d rather pay me a bit extra each week and then I’ll do your breakfast every day. It seems daft cooking separately. What do you think?’
‘Yes, I’d like that.’
‘How about another five bob and for that I’ll do your laundry too?’
‘Oh, yes, please, that would be wonderful.’
Mo chuckled. ‘I still can’t get over how well spoken and polite you are. I must admit I was a bit worried that you wouldn’t fit in at first, but in the short time you’ve been here you’ve become like part of the family.’
‘Yeah, it’s like having a kid sister.’ Emma reiterated. ‘It’s a shame you’re going round to Derek’s today. We could have had another trip to Petticoat Lane.’
‘Maybe next week,’ Pearl said, wishing that she didn’t have to see Derek. She would have preferred to spend the day with Emma, but couldn’t let Derek down again.
‘Well, Gran, what do you think?’ Derek asked as he placed the ring on the table. ‘I got it second-hand from the pawnshop.’
Connie gazed at the diamond in its old-fashioned setting. ‘It’s very nice, but I still think you should wait a while. Pearl’s a nice girl, but you’ve only been courting since the end of August. She’s also very young and might not be ready to settle down.’
‘I think a lot of her and don’t want to lose her. If she says yes, we could wait until she’s eighteen, but at least she’ll have my ring on her finger.’
‘It’d be better to hold off for another year before proposing?’
‘No, I ain’t waiting. I’ve got the ring and I’ve made up my mind. Pearl’s the girl for me and I’m gonna propose today.’
Connie sighed, wishing that Derek could see what was under his nose. Since moving in with Mo and her daughter, Pearl was changing. She was making friends of her own age and seeing less of Derek. She gazed worriedly at her grandson. He was going to be hurt, she could feel it in her bones, and despite liking the girl, she wished he had never met Pearl Button.
Pearl was on her way to Derek’s when she saw Kevin Dolby walking towards her. She hurriedly crossed the road, but he crossed too, stopping in front of her and barring the path. His eyes, she saw, were full of contrition. ‘I owe you an apology, Pearl.’
The memory of the humiliation he’d caused her on the dance floor was fresh, and her mouth tightened. ‘Leave me alone. Just go away and leave me alone.’
‘Look, I know I was out of order last night and I’m sorry.’
‘You told Emma that you’d slept with me, and you … you called me a tart.’
‘I know, but it’s your own fault. You shouldn’t have turned me down.’
‘What did you expect? You know I’m going out with Derek and shouldn’t have asked.’
‘Yes, but as I said before, it was me you slept with. Admit it, Pearl. You’d rather go out with me.’
‘I … I wouldn’t.’
He smiled, his voice soft. ‘Why don’t you come with me for a little drive out into the country? We need to talk and can find somewhere nice and secluded.’
‘I’m on my way to Derek’s.’
‘Sod Derek.’
‘I can’t let him down, Kevin.’
His whole demeanor suddenly changed, his eyes hardening. ‘I don’t see why not.’
‘I can’t because he’s expecting me, and not only that, his gran will have cooked dinner and—’
‘Sod his gran too,’ Kevin spat. ‘Now I ain’t asking you, I’m telling you. You’re coming out with me.’
He reached out, viciously grasping her arm, and Pearl tensed. Last night she had admitted to herself that she still wanted him, still fancied him, but in this mood he was dangerous and all she felt was fear. With a quick jerk she pulled her arm out of Kevin’s grasp, her shoulders hunched as she dashed past him.
Pearl didn’t look back and ran the rest of the way to Derek’s house.
He opened the door to her knock and, seeing his huge bulk, she threw herself into his arms with relief, seeing them only as a refuge from her tangled emotions. She’d have to leave the café, it was the only way to avoid Kevin, but loving the job, her heart sank at the thought.
‘Are you all right, love?’ Derek asked.
‘Yes, I’m fine,’ she lied, forcing a smile as she stepped out of his arms.
With Derek she was safe, his home a haven, and with him her feelings were under control.
By three thirty they had enjoyed a delicious Sunday roast, but since she’d arrived Pearl could sense a strange atmosphere. Connie was unusually quiet, and Derek seemed on edge. She was been thrilled when Connie handed her a card and present, and though she thought it appalling, she thanked her profusely for the long, old-fashioned flannelette nightdress.
‘You’ll be needing that with winter coming along,’ Connie said.
‘Yes, I’m sure I will, and thanks again. It … it’s lovely.’
‘Here’s my card, Pearl. Come into the front room and I’ll give you your present.’
There was a grunt of displeasure from Connie, and Pearl frowned, wondering what was wrong as she followed Derek out of the room.
‘Sit down, love,’ Derek said, his face flushed.
Pearl sat, and at the same time Derek kneeled in front of her. With her heart beginning to thump she saw him pull a small box out of his pocket. Pearl guessed what was coming and gulped, her breath caught in her throat. He was going to propose, but now that the moment had arrived, she found herself wanting to jump up and run. Since moving in with Mo and Emma, she was enjoying life. She loved going dancing, loved being with girls close to her own age, loved the music, the excitement. If she accepted Derek’s proposal she would have to become a staid, married woman. Was she really ready for that?
‘Will … will you marry me?’
Pearl’s eyes fixed on the ring. She thought about Kevin, how she was still attracted to him, but an attraction that was over-shadowed by fear. Derek, though, was offering her what, until now, she thought she wanted: a home where she would be part of a family, cherished and loved for the first time in her life. Still she hesitated, but then Derek spoke again.
‘I don’t expect you to marry me right away, love. I thought maybe in about a year, when you’re eighteen.’
A year, they would wait a year, and she smiled with relief before saying, ‘Yes, all right, I’ll marry you.’
‘Oh, Pearl, that’s great.’ And, leaning forward, he pulled her into his arms. She closed her eyes tightly as he kissed her, but thankfully it was brief.
‘There’s only one thing, Pearl. It’s me gran. I’m all she’s got and I’d hate to leave her on her own. Would you mind moving in here with us when we get married?’
‘Of course I wouldn’t. It’s what I expected and what I want.’
He jumped to his feet and, taking her hand, he dragged her back to the kitchen. ‘She said yes, Gran,’ he cried, ‘and we’re getting married in a year.’
Connie smiled thinly. ‘Congratulations.’
There was a restraint in Connie’s manner and Pearl frowned. Perhaps she was worried about being left on her own. ‘I’m happy to move in here with you and Derek when we get married.’
Connie nodded, but she hardly spoke until Derek left the room half an hour later. After a quick look to ensure that the door was closed, she leaned forward. ‘You’ve changed lately, Pearl, and you’re not seeing much of Derek. You’re out and about with Emma Price, no doubt meeting lads of your own age. Derek’s a lot older than you, and the truth is I expected you to turn him down. A lot can happen in a year and I just hope you ain’t gonna change your mind.’
‘I won’t change my mind.’
‘I’ve told you before. I don’t want my Derek hurt.’
‘I won’t hurt him.’ As she said these words, Pearl really meant them. She would marry Derek and make him a good wife. She was just relieved that she had a year of freedom first.
Kevin banged on Nobby Clark’s door, still in a foul mood. He was smarting that Pearl had turned him down again. Since that first time, she felt like his property and his fists clenched at the thought of her sleeping with Derek Lewis. His jaws ground. Right, sod her, if she wanted Derek she could have him and he’d never ask her out again. In fact, he really would make a play for Emma Price. She wasn’t a bad-looking girl, but then again, she was a bit lippy. He remembered how she had intervened at the dance and he frowned. Emma wasn’t like Pearl; she seemed fearless and not the sort of girl he could control. In fact, he thought, changing his mind, it might be better to give her a wide berth.
His trips to Soho were costing him a lot of money, and that was something he was short of at the moment. Once again his fists clenched in anger. With Pearl as his girlfriend he would’ve had what he wanted on hand, and could have taught her a few tricks.
Nobby Clark opened the door, forcing Kevin’s thoughts to one side. ‘Hello, mate, can I come in?’
‘Yeah, I suppose so.’
As Kevin stepped inside he saw Dick Smedley, but the man offered no welcome.
‘Watcha, Dick, how’s things?’
‘What do you want, Kevin?’
‘I’ve come to see if you’ve got a job in the offing.’
‘I thought you didn’t want to work with amateurs again.’
‘Yeah, that’s what you called us,’ Nobby said as he sat at the table.
‘Look, I’ve told you before, I didn’t mean it. I was unnerved that night and you can’t blame me for that.’
‘Maybe, but you seem to forget that I’m the boss and I want a bit of respect.’
Kevin hid his feelings. If he wanted back in, he’d have to suck up to Nobby, but it went against the grain. The bloke was a loser and couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery, but the need for money was paramount. ‘I know you’re the boss, Nobby, and we couldn’t do the jobs without you. As I said, I lost it, but it won’t happen again.’
‘What do you think, Dick? Shall we let him back in?’
‘I still ain’t happy about that night. He was shit scared, and so keen to get away that he almost drove off without us.’
‘I didn’t. I’d never do that.’
‘I only just managed to get into the back of the van before you shot off.’
‘I admit I was keen to get away – that alarm was deafening – but I wouldn’t have left you behind.’
Dick’s eyes narrowed, but to Kevin’s relief he said, ‘All right, I suppose I’ll have to take your word for it.’
Nobby smiled tightly. ‘We’ll give you the benefit of the doubt, Kevin. We need a driver so you’re in. Take a seat and we’ll tell you what we’ve got planned.’
20
When Pearl had shown her ring to Mo and Emma, their reactions hadn’t been favourable. Both thought she was too young to think about marriage, but Emma was most vociferous in her opinions. She told Pearl in no uncertain terms that she was mad, that Derek was too old for her, and that she should go out with other men, not settle on the first one to propose.
The costermongers had reacted differently, all of them loud in their congratulations, and though they had ribbed Derek at first, some even saying he was a cradle snatcher, they seemed genuinely pleased. Pearl was one of their own now, and none had forgotten her hand in finding Frank Hanswell’s son.
Three weeks had now passed since their engagement, and Pearl was enjoying life. She was still attending art classes, but going out and about with Emma for another couple of nights a week, it meant she was seeing less of Derek. He didn’t seem to mind, content that she was now wearing his ring, and whilst she was out dancing with Emma, he spent extra time at the gym in preparation for his next fight.
Pearl still suspected that Alice Freeman was pinching her tips, but so far hadn’t caught her. In her vigilance she noticed that Bernie was acting strangely too. He would leave the counter at odd times, Alice quickly stepping in to take his place, and though this
put more work on to Pearl, she was coping well. Few customers had cause for complaint, but she still found it odd that Bernie chose to disappear at their busiest times.
Pearl was clearing a table when Kevin came downstairs. Since her engagement he hadn’t spoken to her, and this had led to her job hunting taking a back seat. She still flicked through the local paper each week, seeing jobs on offer in shops and factories, but none offered the perks of the café with free lunch every day. As long as Kevin stayed away from her she was able to keep her feeling under control, but when her heart lurched every time she saw him, she wasn’t sure if it was love she was feeling, or fear.
Before the lunchtime rush had stared, Dolly marched out of the kitchen, followed by Bernie. Her stance was stiff, her face red with anger. ‘Alice, come here,’ she yelled. ‘I want to talk to you.’
Bernie took Pearl’s arm. ‘Stay down this end for a while and out of the way.’
At first Pearl couldn’t hear what Dolly was saying to Alice, but then her voice rose to a roar. ‘Don’t take me for a fool, girl! We’ve been in this business too long and know all the tricks.’
‘It wasn’t me,’ Alice cried. ‘It must have been Pearl.’
‘No, lady, don’t try to pass the buck. My husband knew that money was going missing and it didn’t take him long to work out who was dipping in the till. We’ve a good mind to call the police and have you done for thieving.’
‘No. Oh, please don’t do that.’
Dolly’s hands flapped, her temper high. ‘Get your coat and get out. I don’t know how you got references from your last job, but you certainly won’t get any from me. In fact, I’ll make sure that word passes in the area that you’re a thief.’
White-faced, Alice grabbed her coat from the hook. She took her bag from under the counter, and then Pearl’s mouth gaped as Alice almost flung her out of the way in her haste to leave.
She regained her footing as the door crashed shut, Bernie shaking his head. ‘Alice thought she could take us for mugs, Pearl, but I knew what she was up to.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘She was fiddling the till. I noticed takings were down a bit weeks ago so I decided to keep an eye on her, and though I’m sorry to say it, Pearl, I had to check up on you too. It didn’t take me long to realise that Alice was always eager to take over the counter, and when I started to leave it more often, she got greedy.’
