“Yes. I’ll come to the hospital first thing in the morning when they wake up. Oh, and Kim’s here. You called her?” Laura mentioned. She glanced over her shoulder and noticed that Kim had picked up on the tension in the one-sided conversation.
“Yeah, I did. Laura, I didn’t want you going home and being alone. I can’t be there with you, so I’m glad she’s there. Listen, go get some sleep, and I’ll see you in the morning.”
Laura held the disconnected phone and gazed out the darkened window. She heard a nickering and remembered Ladystar, Andy’s horse. Kim must have heard, too, because she slid back her chair and said, “I’ll go check on her again. I already filled her water and fed her.”
“Thank you. I don’t want to go and leave the babies alone in the house…”
Kim touched her arm. “Don’t worry. I have a flashlight in the truck. I’ll go take care of her. Did you want me to stay the night?” She slid on her coat.
Laura shook her head. “No, we’ll be okay, but thank you for coming, even though it was my husband who asked you to.”
“Don’t mention it, Laura, and call me please, any time, day or night.” Kim hesitated and then gave a sharp nod before stepping out the door. Laura slid the deadbolt home and listened to the truck door shut. She rested her head against the frame, willing for the morning to hurry and come, fearing this would be an awfully long night.
Chapter 12
Andy stared at the dark screen of his cell phone. Laura was at home with his babies, and the neighbor was there with her. Good. They were home, they were safe, and at least he didn’t have them to add to his worries. It wasn’t that Laura worried him—she was one of the strongest, most amazing young women he’d ever met, and she’d suffered and struggled for so long. He just couldn’t bear to see the shadow of anxiety hanging over her. He’d never known what it was like to worry about putting food on the table, food in his mouth, a roof over his head, having to choose between going hungry or paying the heating bills, but Laura had, and Andy had sworn she’d never have to live through that again. But this was her little boy, Gabriel, who had brought Andy and Laura together, and he was fighting for his life. For the first time in Andy’s life, all his Friessen money meant nothing.
Starting out in Montana, moving his family here, was supposed to have been exciting. This was supposed to have meant a new life for them, a new place to watch his children grow up, a new place for them to live, to love, and to laugh, but when life decided to throw him a curveball, it sometimes hit like a five-ton steel shot, knocking him flat on his ass. The fact was that Laura had cornered him on the phone, and he didn’t want to tell her what the doctor had said.
He hadn’t even reconciled in his own mind what the hell they were going to do. He needed to think, to figure everything out and have some reasonable answers before he could tell Laura one word. The doctor had said that Gabriel had high-risk abnormal mutations, which meant the cancer was aggressive and constantly changing. It had not only reached his blood but was subtype M4, which the doctor had said was more likely to form masses. All Andy could make sense of was that this type of cancer was aggressive and moved fast. They needed a match, a family match—and now.
Andy walked over to the bed where Gabriel was fast asleep, tubes sticking out of his arm. He was so tiny, lying in that hospital bed, his dark, curly hair a little too long, stuck to the sides of his head. He was breathing evenly and deeply, and Andy set his hand on his forehead and gently brushed the locks back. Gabriel stirred only to snuggle into Andy’s hand, as if he knew he was there and his touch was all he needed. Andy could feel his eyes burning as he stared at this tiny bit of innocence, his little boy who didn’t deserve any of this. His nose was the same as Laura’s, cute and pert, and he had her high cheekbones. Andy blinked and fought for a breath, trying to steady his nerves. He needed help, and as he clutched his phone in his other hand, he considered what he had to do. He wasn’t a match, and Laura wasn’t close enough. God help him, but right now Andy was sure he’d bargain with the devil himself if that would save Gabriel’s life.
He stepped away from the bed and dialed a number on his cell as he moved into the hall, walking past the open doorways in the pediatric ward. He listened to the ringing as he walked past each room, moms and dads and siblings with their sick kids, so many of them. He’d never for one moment realized how many children were suffering and fighting for their lives. It wasn’t okay.
“Yeah?” a gruff voice barked over the line. Andy could hear from his cousin’s voice that he’d been fast asleep.
“Neil, it’s Andy. I know it’s late. I’m sorry to wake you,” Andy said. He wondered whether Neil could hear the shake in his voice, because this was the first time Andy had ever allowed such deep emotion to take him out at the knees.
“Andy, is everything okay?” Neil said. He must have picked up on something, as he sounded suddenly awake, and Andy could hear his cousin’s wife asking who it was, then Neil’s muffled reply of “It’s Andy. Go back to sleep” before he spoke again: “Andy, where are you? Have you settled into your new place? How did the move go?” There was rustling in the background as if Neil had climbed out of bed. Andy had to force himself to clear his throat so he could talk.
“We’re in trouble. It’s Gabriel. He’s sick.” It was all he managed to get out as he stood in front of the stairwell and then pushed the door open. He didn’t want anyone to hear him, and the last thing Andy wanted to do was fall apart where someone could see. He stepped into the empty stairwell, letting the door swing shut behind him.
“Whoa, back up a second. What’s going on?” Neil asked, sounding a bit frantic.
“Gabriel had a fever, and we thought it was the flu, but he didn’t get better, and we were getting worried. We took him to the doctor today. He has leukemia.” Andy quickly shoved his fisted hand against his mouth as he felt himself choking up.
There was nothing but silence on the other end, and then Neil let out a sigh. “Oh my God, Andy. I’m so sorry. What did the doctor say? How bad is it?”
“It’s leukemia, for fuck’s sake, Neil. It’s bad,” he snapped, feeling bad the minute he did so. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, Andy.”
“I have to find him a donor, and he needs an ideal match, which is family. Laura’s not close enough.”
He could hear Neil groaning on the other end. “Andy, you can’t do this alone. Do you want us to come? Candy and I’ll get on a plane.”
He swallowed for a second, because the fact was that he needed someone to watch his back. “Yeah, could you? I haven’t told Laura how bad it is, and I’m worried. She’s so tired now with the twins.”
“Don’t worry, we’re coming. Candy and I’ll help with the kids. Look, Andy, we’ll help you figure this out. I’ll call you when we land.”
Andy felt such overwhelming relief as he stared at the disconnected phone. It should have been his parents he could call, rallying them to his side, to Laura’s, but at least he had his cousin Neil. Jed and Brad would come, too, if he called, but he stopped short of that. They would all come. They’d all stand with him, and they’d help him. He knew that. As Andy slumped to the concrete steps and lowered his face in his hands, he couldn’t explain to anyone the sense of relief that tore him up. Neil was on his way. He’d never allowed himself to need anyone, to depend on anyone, until now.
Chapter 13
Laura stared at the clock beside the bed. The white glow of “5:59 AM” had burned into her eyes as she watched the time tick by slowly. Even though she was so tired, she couldn’t sleep, and she’d tossed and turned most of the night after feeding the babies and putting them back to sleep. When she crawled back to her own bed, she slid her hand to Andy’s side, over his pillow, wishing he could be here so she could rest her head on his shoulder, feel his arms around her. Maybe her head, her mind, her thoughts could then stop racing to every nightmarish scenario she was trying to hide from.
She wondered if her sleepless night
wasn’t just about her sweet little boy being so sick but also about her husband, who was the life force of their family, the man who held them together and took care of everything. She loved Andy so deeply, and she couldn’t get her head around the fact that her little boy, whom she loved more than her next breath, was so gravely ill, and Andy was there with him. In that moment, she wished that Andy could be Gabriel’s true, biological father. She wished a lot of things through the night, crying into Andy’s pillow until she had no more tears, beating herself up, letting herself wonder whether she was responsible for this. Maybe everyone had been right, and she should have given Gabriel up when he was a baby, but she soon became angry at herself for thinking that way. How could she not, though? Until a year ago, she’d lived in nothing but dirty, unhealthy places because she couldn’t afford anything else.
“Stop it,” she muttered as she pressed her palms against her forehead and rubbed. She reached for the cell phone beside her on the nightstand, hoping Andy would have phoned in the night. She wanted to talk to him, to hear his voice. She only wondered for a second whether he was asleep as she pressed the number he’d programmed into her phone. That was just what he did: He set things up, organized them, showing her only what he felt she should know. As she listened to the ringing, she knew Andy would censor any news.
“Hello?” He cleared his throat and sounded half asleep.
“Hi. I woke you.” She sighed. Just hearing him breathe on the other end helped.
“Everything okay?” Of course, he was instantly alert.
“I couldn’t sleep, between worrying about Gabriel and you not being here. It was a long night. How is Gabriel?” she asked.
“He’s been asleep all night. You have to get some rest, Laura, or you’re no good to the babies.”
“I know, Andy, but I can’t rest here when I’m worrying about what’s going on there.”
He sighed on the other end.
“As soon as the babies are awake, I’m coming in,” Laura said. At the same time, she wondered how she could divide her time between her two babies and Gabriel. At times like this, she wished for family, for some support for her and Andy. Maybe she could talk him into calling his cousin Jed and his wife, Diana, who was Laura’s friend and the closest person she had to family. Diana had always been there for her, even taking her in for a time.
“I called Neil,” Andy said. “He’s flying in with Candy to help. I know you want to be here, and…”
He stopped talking, and she realized then how tired he was. Whatever he was holding on to, he had almost let it slip. So there was more. She knew it deep inside her as she sat up in bed and strode over to the window, shivering in the cold as she brushed back the curtain and stared out at the trace of snow on the ground just as the sun touched the horizon. She swallowed, irritated that Andy had called Neil without talking to her first. He had just made all the arrangements, which was what he did all the time.
“It snowed last night, Andy. You could have mentioned you were calling your family,” she snapped. The minute she said it, she wished she could take it back.
“Laura, you need some help, and I can only do so much. I need to be here, and it’s best if Chelsea and Jeremy aren’t here at the hospital, day in and day out.”
“I know,” she said. “I’m sorry. I’m just tired. I wish you’d talk to me more, tell me what you’re thinking when you decide on something. I would kind of like to be consulted. Last night, you didn’t tell me you’d called Kim. How do you think it made me feel, driving in here and finding her parked outside the house, hearing that my husband had called her. You made me feel incompetent.”
“Laura, you’re reading too much into it. I called Kim and my family for a lot of reasons. I didn’t want you to have to struggle. I need to know you’re okay. I feel helpless here with Gabriel, as if something has been taken from my control, and I don’t like it one bit. I’m sorry you felt slighted, but I’d do it again to know someone was there for you.”
He sounded irritated, and Laura felt bad. She knew this was the way he was. He was possessive, controlling, stubborn, strong, and powerful, and he’d seriously hurt anyone who tried to mess with them. She knew he loved them deeply, and to be loved by him truly, not just as an obligation, was a powerful thing that had her tearing up again.
“Andy, I love you, but you make me so frustrated when you won’t talk to me about how you’re feeling, about your decisions. I have a mind, Andy. I may be young, but I’m not helpless,” she said, and Jeremy picked that moment to cry out. “Jeremy’s awake. I’m going to feed him, and as soon as they’re both up, I’m coming in.” She glimpsed Ladystar outside with her blanket on. “Andy, I forgot about Ladystar. I’ll check on her and feed her before we go.”
“No, you have enough to do with the babies. I’ll call Kim, ask her to come by and feed the horse. Maybe I’ll see if she can move Ladystar to her place. She has two Quarter Horses. You know what? I’ll call Kim now and get her to drive you in. You’ve never driven on snow-covered roads, and there could be icy patches out of nowhere. I don’t want you taking any chances.”
“No, Andy, you’re not calling Kim to drive me. For the love of God, Andy, it’s six in the morning! Like any sane person, she’ll still be asleep. I can drive. I’ll just be careful.”
“No,” he said. “I’ll worry the entire way, and I have enough to worry about with Gabriel. I don’t need to worry about you on the road. I’ll grab a cab now, come home, shower, and change. I don’t like leaving Gabriel.”
“Andy, stop it! I’m not useless.” Jeremy was getting louder as she started down the hall.
“Laura, that’s not what I meant, and I don’t want to fight. I’m tired, and you’re obviously taking this the wrong way. I’ll just check with a nurse, and then I’ll be on my way home.”
He disconnected before she could say another word, and she squeezed the phone, fighting the urge to toss it across the room. Instead, she tossed it on the rocker in the babies’ room and lifted Jeremy from his crib. She wondered, as she strode back to her room to nurse Jeremy, when Andy would finally let her in.
Chapter 14
Of course, Andy walked in the door shortly after Laura had gotten dressed. This was the first morning she’d been alone in the house, just her and the babies, and having no one to watch Chelsea and Jeremy while she showered had been nerve wracking. Andy stalked down the hall to their bedroom, boots scraping the hardwood floor, his hair unusually messy. The lines under his eyes showed how tired he was, but he was strong, too, and he charged the air in the room every time he walked in. It became alive and powerful, and that was what drew people to him. Laura figured he could command a space better than any general could.
“You ready?” he asked, taking in her wet hair, her bare feet, and the turtleneck sweater she was still tucking into her jeans.
“Almost. I just have to change Chelsea and Jeremy and load up their diaper bag,” she said, feeling a little awkward and hurt at the same time. “You know, Andy, I love you, but it hurts when you call another woman, even though you say it’s to help me. I’m capable, yet you trust Kim more than me.”
“Oh my God, Laura, would you drop this already?” His eyes flashed with anger as he snapped at her and continued into their bathroom.
“That’s not fair, Andy, and you’re treating me like a child.” She stood her ground, following him into the bathroom.
“Seriously, would you drop this? It’s got nothing to do with me trusting Kim more. You’re creating problems that aren’t there. I called her because she doesn’t have anyone, no husband, no kids, and she’s our neighbor. She offered, and you have your hands full. I’m not here to help you, Laura. I can’t be in two places at the same time.”
He yanked off his blue knit sweater, stalking out of the bathroom and tossing it on the unmade bed. Her eyes went right to his chest, that magnificent chest, and those strong, sculpted shoulders. He was absolutely ripped, and her body remembered what it felt like to be held a
gainst that chest, to rest her head on shoulders that were anything but soft. Being held by him made her feel as if she could take on the world. She loved to run her fingers through the dark hair covering his chest. She felt a lot of things when Andy was around, as he stirred passion, anger, every emotion inside her. She’d give anything to have him with her. He sighed and shut his eyes, and she knew he was coping with a lot. Maybe she was being unreasonable.
He started toward her, setting his hands on her shoulders. “Did you eat?”
Seeing the worry in his eyes, she felt like crap again, so she shook her head and touched his arm. A second later, she found herself pulled against his chest, breathing him in, loving the feel of him holding her.
“You have to eat. I’m not hungry, either, but we’re not helping the kids if we don’t eat. Go make us some eggs and coffee. I’ll grab a shower, and then we’ll go.” He rubbed her back as he spoke, and Laura didn’t let go. She kept her arms where they were, around his waist. When Jeremy let out a squawk, she rubbed her face against his chest and rested her chin there, gazing up into his tired eyes.
“Your son is so demanding, just like his father,” she said. She wondered if that amused him, but Andy had a way of thinking and holding on to things, making her wonder where his head was.
“And his sister is patient and quiet, just like her mama,” he said. He slid his hand over her cheek and leaned down, pressing a light and tender kiss on her lips and just holding himself there. All the fire and love she felt, all of her need for him, seemed to grow in her heart, bigger and stronger than she’d ever thought possible.
He stepped away. “Go get our boy,” he said. “I’ll get in the shower.”
Chapter 15
Laura had been especially quiet on the drive back to the hospital. Andy knew he’d made her angry, but he’d rather have her angry than stuck in the ditch, or hurt, or overwhelmed in any way. Maybe this was part of his desire to make things easier for her, to somehow make up for all her struggles as a teenage single mother, just trying to make ends meet. He knew she carried so much pain in her heart after what her parents had done, tossing her away instead of standing by her in her hour of need. When Kim had pulled in right before they left, Andy had seen the way Laura frowned, and she didn’t pretend for a moment she was happy to see her. Kim, though, had been pleasant and neighborly, and Andy had asked her if she could take Ladystar back to her place. Of course, she’d said yes. She was a nice woman, and he didn’t understand why Laura didn’t seem to like her.
The Deadline (The Friessens: A New Beginning) Page 6
