“But the, uh, families,” she accented the word. “Aren’t they usually Italian? You know, the Godfather and all?”
“I’m actually kinda hurt.” I shook my head. “You mean to tell me you’ve never heard of the Russian mob?”
Her green eyes narrowed slightly, then widened as if finally piecing together the puzzle of my life. But rather than run like I expected, she stood there defiantly, daring me to continue. But fear was a good reaction, one I needed her to have if she were to deal with this—my world.
Closing the distance between us, I stopped an inch from her face. Trying like hell to ignore the way her soft fragrance called to me, I whispered in my most menacing tone. “Now that you know, I feel it’s important to pass along family lesson one.” I waited, pausing for effect. “Keep your freaking mouth shut.” With a final glare, I left the room, hoping my threat had hit its mark. For her sake.
CHAPTER FOUR
Daphne
LATER, WE TURNED ON A MOVIE in Khan’s room, but my mind was still spinning from what I’d learned earlier. Sofia leaned against Jude, but her posture was stiff and unnatural. Jude didn’t seem to notice.
Did he know? From the way Sofia had reacted to everything, I assumed no, but I could have been wrong. Would he keep something like that from me?
Hell yeah, he would. I knew it. Because he’d think he was protecting me. Leave it to Jude. Yet, just as I thought it, I was reminded of Khan. Wasn’t he doing the same thing for his sister, Sofia? Just where did everything fit in with the mob, though? Everything seemed so wrong. Yet it didn’t change the fact that when it came down to it, Khan put his family first.
Wasn’t that right?
Except that it had gotten him shot.
And in some deep shit from another family.
Seriously, it was like some mafia/mob soap opera. I could hear the bad accents in my head.
Only it wasn’t acting; it was real, and I was sitting in the very middle.
Literally.
I was surrounded. And being the paranoid person I was, I felt the need to continually check the French doors, just in case someone was peeking in.
I mean, didn’t they — whoever they were — know where Khan lived? Were they really safe here? Was I safe here? My heart pounded, and I turned back to the flat screen, trying to focus on whatever was on, but all I saw was a flash of color as I focused on my peripheral vision — just in case.
“You are so uptight you’re actually making me have stress just by looking at you,” Khan spoke quietly in my ear.
I froze. The whole sneaking-up-on-me thing? Not cool. As if I wasn’t paranoid enough, now I knew he could move like a ghost.
A ghost that could bleed. Just like that, my brain shifted back into gear, and I turned to face him. “You shouldn’t be out of bed.”
“You shouldn’t be so uptight,” he replied calmly.
Which simply just pissed me off.
“Bed.” I pointed, glaring at him. Trying to ignore the way his blue eyes studied me, the color of rich sapphire velvet. The scent of laundry detergent clung to his clothes, and I could smell the heat from his body. Unwillingly, my gaze drank him in, memorizing him while trying to maintain my pissed-off facade.
“No.” His gaze dropped to my lips then met mine once again, his expression hardening.
Odd.
“I worked too damn hard to have you start to bleed all over again,“ I whispered
“I’m not going to start bleeding again. I’m already healing up.” He shrugged, calling my bluff.
“But—“
“Nope. Not moving. I like it here.” He raised a dark eyebrow and very gingerly sat next to me.
“You’re impossible.” I turned my attention to the movie, realizing that it was scrolling the credits. The space where Jude and Sofia had been sitting was empty, and I scanned the room in confusion.
“I like to think I’m more… decisive.”
“Where did everyone go?” I asked, leaning forward to see out into the hallway.
“They left when the movie actually ended. You were too busy searching for someone to attack you through my very private, very secure back yard.”
I glared. “Yeah, well… not all of us have grown up with secrets like you… and... and…”
“And?” He tilted his head, his expression curious.
“And it’s not normal! How do you expect me to react? Hello? You’re freaking Russian mob!” I yell-whispered, glancing to the French doors once more. I couldn’t help it!
“And?”
“And… and… I don’t know. It’s just… a lot.” I shrugged and started to pick invisible lint from my jeans.
“I know.” He sighed. “But to be fair… you did give me an ultimatum.”
Turning to him, I studied his face. He wasn’t more than a few years older, but his eyes were older, ancient even. “So… where do you fit in?” I asked before my better judgment could make me rethink my question.
“Here and there.” He leaned back and closed his eyes.
“That explains it all.” I rolled my eyes.
“I wasn’t trying to explain anything. Daph… you’re just getting a glimpse into something that I would have never chosen if — if — given the chance. You? You do have a choice. I’m not going to steal that from you by telling you too much. Seriously… you’re already freaked out. Why would I make it worse?” He rolled his head to the side with a questioning expression on his handsome face.
“I don’t know…” I mumbled.
“Exactly. You don’t know. And ignorance can be bliss sometimes.”
I peeked up, watching his dark brows furrow, as his full lips thinned slightly.
Even frowning, he was beautiful, tempting to the extreme, and with each passing moment, the attraction grew stronger.
“Sofia’s going to talk with Jude tonight. Do you think… How do you think he’ll react?” He squinted, and I turned my face away, not wanting to risk him discovering just how fascinating I found him.
“I’m not sure. Jude’s pretty observant when it comes to Sofia. I’d be surprised if he wasn’t at least somewhat aware that something was different. I mean, he was the one who told me you could go to jail, so…” I shrugged. “… I think Jude knows more than he lets on.”
Khan was quiet, so I hazarded a glance at his face, noticing the way he worked his jaw and looked to the door “Yeah, that’s what I kinda thought, but there’s a world of difference between what someone thinks and the truth.” He pinched his nose. “I just… I don’t want my sister to suffer because of something she can’t control, you know? She loves Jude, loves him, as in she’s already named her future Jude-babies.” He turned to me, his blue eyes cloudy with anxiety.
“Marybelle, Alexandra, and Zoar,” I mumbled.
He tilted his head and studied me.
Shrugging, I added. “Jude told me. What? You think Sofia came up with those names on her own?” I shook my head. “Not to throw my brother under the bus, but he’s totally a girl on those things. But to be honest, I don’t get the whole Zoar name…” I shook my head. “Sounds like Thor’s evil twin.” I chuckled.
“I asked her about that once.” Khan shrugged. “It means small one, or humble beginning. It also means a place of rest and peace. I think that’s why she loved it… you know, dreaming of a time when…” His voice trailed off. “Hmm, since they already picked out their kids’ names, I think I’ll give Jude a bit more credit. It’s just… I can’t protect her from much it seems, and I… I don’t want her to hurt.” He closed his eyes.
“Me either.” And I meant it.
The warmth coming from Khan’s body lulled me into a state of security.
“I’m proud of you. It’s been more than five minutes since you did a perimeter check.”
“Huh?” I tilted my head in confusion.
He nodded toward the French doors.
“Oh. Well, I was distracted.” I straightened up.
“Good thing you’re not a
target.”
“And there went that moment of false security,” I mumbled and stood. “You need to get to bed.” I wiggled my fingers as I extended my hand toward him.
“You going to join me?” He gave me a wicked grin as he gripped my hand tightly.
I tugged his hand. “Sorry, not that kind of nurse, Swiss.”
“Damn it. I thought you’d forget about that stupid name,” he mumbled as he stood, careful to put his weight on the other leg.
Shaking my head, I lifted his arm and put it over my shoulder so I could help him with the weight. “Keeps your ego in check.”
“I’m allergic to dairy.”
“So am I,” I shot back, raising an eyebrow as he shook his head and chuckled.
“Fair enough.”
When we made it to his bed, I helped him lower himself and then adjusted the pillow under his leg.
“Do you need anything else?” I asked, trying not to focus on the heat in his gaze. It was incredible how his eyes could shift from hard and cold like a glacier, to warm and inviting like the Caribbean Sea. It pulled me in, making me forget about anything — everything. The way he looked at me made it feel like I had offered something different, and for a second… I wished I had.
CHAPTER FIVE
Khan
RED HAIR CASCADED FROM HER LONG-abandoned ponytail and teased me with the fiery softness it promised if I were to just reach out and touch it. Did I need anything else? Hell yeah, but I wasn’t in any position to ask for it.
“Khan?” she asked. The soft caress of my name on her lips had to be part of my imagination, but I didn’t care. I’d take whatever I could get. She was the first for me. Aside from my sister, she was the only girl who knew the truth.
And she wasn’t afraid… of me at least. There was no reflection of the monster when I saw myself in her gaze. I just saw… me.
I didn’t realize how much I wanted that till it slammed into me… and, inch by inch, any resistance I was able to hold up was melting like snow in summer. It was easy to keep her at a distance when she was in the dark… but now.
Rather than pulling her into my darkness, it was as if she pulled me into a little of her light, and it was addicting.
I wanted more.
Needed more.
“Seriously, Khan, do you need anything?” she asked again, probably thinking I’d lost whatever was left of my mind.
“Uh, yeah. Can I have some more water?” I answered just as I saw my almost-full glass. Damn.
“It’s full.” Her eyes narrowed.
“It’s old water.” I recovered.
Her eyebrows rose, but she shrugged. Then, rather than walk around the bed to reach the side table where my glass sat, she reached across the bed. Her soft shirt brushed against my bare chest, causing my body to catch fire while inhaling the soft and feminine scent of lemon that clung to her skin. A stray curl tickled my shoulder as she stretched. I was rewarded with an erotic view of her lower back and a further temptation when her shorts slid higher on her thigh as well.
It was more of a temptation than I could resist.
“Daph?” My voice was thick and aroused.
She paused mid-stretch and glanced to me. “Oh! I’m so sorry—“
Wasting no time, I grasped her hips — painfully noticing how they filled out my hands — and lifted them so that she was forced to roll onto the bed beside me. I turned onto my side and faced her, ignoring her protesting squeal and annoyed expression. After reaching up, I traced her jawline and ran my thumb over her lower lip, loving that her mouth was naked — not covered in lip-gloss or lipstick. Her eyes widened, and her breathing froze for a moment before picking up quickly.
“Tell me no.” I leaned forward slowly, giving her the perfect opportunity to save me from doing something rash, crazy.
“No,” she whispered, but licked her lips and darted her deep green eyes to my mouth in expectation.
Groaning, I pulled away slightly. “You can’t say no with your lips and yes with your eyes, Daph. What’s it going to be?” I asked, praying she’d say yes. I hadn’t ever been the guy who took what wasn’t being offered, but I was seriously tempted to be that guy right now.
“Yes,” she whispered so quietly I had to read it on her lips then in her eyes. Her body was tense; I could feel it in the stiff way she was guarding herself away from me, so I moved slowly, wanting to make it more than a kiss, knowing I was on the edge of a cliff and taking that… One. Deliberate. Step. Knowing I was pulling her with me, because there was no going back after this, but honestly, there was no going back from the moment she’d found out.
My body demanded I go faster, but I resisted the temptation to simply feed my own desire. Gently, I tasted her lips, closing my eyes and soaking in the sensation of her soft lips melting under mine. She breathed softly, as if releasing the tension of expectation and just… felt
And I found that I did the same. How long had it been since I’d just felt? I met her lips once more, this time lingering, allowing their softness to remain along mine, tasting their unique favor and committing it to memory. She was sweet and warm, instantly making me crave more. Sliding my tongue along her lower lip, I felt her gasp slightly then lean into the kiss a bit more, inviting me. My hands itched to feel her, to map her curves, so I traced from her shoulder down her arm, noticing how goosebumps dotted her soft skin. Once I reached her hand, I almost continued on my exploration, knowing her hip was just a few inches away, but I stopped and threaded my fingers through hers. It felt so right, like she fit, even when I knew she didn’t know it yet.
But she would. I’d make sure of it.
I flicked my tongue against her teeth, caressing them and pulling back on her lower lip, drawing it into my mouth to savor its velvet.
A gentle tug pulled my attention to her fingers in my hair. My body tensed, knowing it was kryptonite, but I couldn’t lose control. It was clear she wasn’t making any move to do more than kiss, and I wouldn’t push her and risk scaring her off.
Her grip tightened on my hand while she twisted the fingers of her other hand in my hair. Ignoring the pain, I reached around and pulled her in tighter with my wounded arm till our bodies met — fire and desire, passion and restraint. Her heat was a siren call, but I lavished my attention on her lips, nipping, teasing, caressing, and devouring.
Letting her lead, I slowed the kiss when I felt her body tense once more. Carefully, I slowed till each kiss was more and more innocent — even when my body wanted the exact opposite. Pulling back, I blinked and tried to read her expression beyond the drunken seduction that she wore in her eyes.
“I — I…” she started then swallowed.
I simply shook my head slightly and reached up, smoothed her hair, loving the feel of her thick silk-like locks against my fingers. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long…” I leaned forward and kissed her nose. “You have no idea.”
But now she knew.
And was in my arms.
Wearing my kiss on her lips, fingers clinging to mine, and only a breath away.
Damn, but I wanted to taste her again.
And again.
The glow on her face dimmed, replaced with a shadow of indecision, and I swear I could hear her thoughts as they centered on what she knew and how she felt.
“Don’t,” I whispered and kissed her softly, willing the fear to melt away.
“How?” She breathed against my lips.
The soft tickle of her words broke against me like waves against the sand, and I could feel my control trickling away like the sand pulled back by the tide. Desperation clawed me, wanting me to stake some sort of claim before she came to her senses and realized just how bad of an idea this could be. I could almost taste the debate in her soul, and I wanted to decide for her…
But I wouldn’t… I couldn’t.
I drew away from her soft lips and met her gaze directly. “I honestly don’t know… but I do know this one thing.” I tightened my grasp on her fingers. “Mo
re than anything, I want to find out. Can you… will you do that?” I held my breath, trying to read her answer before my heart gave out.
CHAPTER SIX
Daphne
I STILL HADN’T ANSWERED KHAN. Rather than say exactly what I wanted… I ran. Now after a night of tossing, turning, counting sheep, and only seeing the hurt in his eyes every time I closed mine, I stared into the coffee mug Margo had set in front of me and tried not to cry.
Stupid coffee.
“You okay, honey?” Margo asked, sitting across from me. I was up way too early — or too late, depending on how you looked at it, and thankfully, she was the only other person awake.
“No,” I answered honestly. Maybe it was the fact I was so tired that I had no filter, but I just didn’t want to pretend to be all right, not when my heart was slowly pulling in two directions.
“Want to talk about it? I keep good secrets,” she offered with a gentle smile.
I watched her, studying her expression. She was Khan’s mother; surely she was aware of everything, or at least most. How did she deal? Did I dare ask?
“Is it Khan? Are you worried about him?” She placed a warm hand over mine, offering reassurance. Dropping my head to table and closing my eyes, I let the cool wood distract me from how much I sucked right then. I mean, I was the nurse and had the job of reassuring the patient’s family, and here the mother was worried about me.
This wasn’t a promising start to my career.
“No, I mean, yes, but not like that,” I answered, tilting my head so my cheek rested against the wood.
“Alright.” I heard her take a sip of coffee. “Did he hurt you?”
My head shot up. “No! Of course not, I… I’m afraid I hurt him,” I answered slowly, waiting for her reaction.
“Turned him down flat, huh?” She raised a dark eyebrow.
“No, I mean… I didn’t say… anything. Wait.” I tilted my head and studied her. “What do you mean turned him down?”
“Dear, if you’d have been a fly on the wall in this kitchen over the years, you wouldn’t have to ask that question. I mean, the boy’s smart but not exactly stealthy…” Her expression clouded slightly. “… in some areas, that is,” she amended.
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