“I hope no one in your realm takes a picture, or Goddess forbid a video of a wolf on my back,” Sarn says into my mind with feigned disgust.
I ignore his grumbling. I’ve been away from my Florida clan for more than a year and have only communicated telepathically with my brother. I miss the familiarity it offers, so I attempt to cast my thoughts to the dragon.
“No, I haven’t shifted to this form in a year,” he responds.
I’m thrilled he can hear me. It must be his magic, though I’m sad at his answer. To have this ability and not use it would cause too much suffering for me. I must think positive thoughts while around him, so I start asking questions while we swoop through the sky. “Tell me the colors of the other dragons.”
“Goddess have mercy,” he growls. “Bastian is red, Laryn blue, and Tahr silver.”
I’m on a roll. “Do you ever fly together?”
“Yes…” he responds like I’m a halfwit.
I go on without a care. “It must be a splendid sight. Do your brides ride with you?” His scales ripple a bit and I think maybe I’ve overstepped my bounds by asking about the brides. I’m so curious, though, and want to know everything about his life and the dragon realms.
He’s quieter when he answers and I know I’ve made him sad. “They ride while they’re vigorous enough to handle it. We have special saddles made for them so they can keep their seat. They’re not like you; they are simply human. When they grow too old, we carry them within our talons if we fly to another dragon’s realm.”
My poor dragon. I can’t help but think of the brides in his realm as mates. To lose a mate is more suffering than I can imagine. To lose as many as Sarn has—devastating. The loss of my mother destroyed my father for many years. I know I’m pushing Sarn, but I can’t stop myself from asking. “Tell me of your last bride. I would like to know of her.” I did this for him. My wolf rumbled in my belly at the thought of hearing about another woman. I quieted her down with an internal mind slap.
Sarn doesn’t hesitate in answering, which surprises me because I know he still misses her deeply. “Her name was Calista and she was beautiful, brave, and intelligent. She lived each day to its fullest. Even in her waning years she refused to allow age to interfere with the things she set her mind to.” He chuckles slightly and smoke trails out of his nostrils and floats away with the wind. “A few years before her death, when she was quite old, she decided to replace the curtains in the library. I walked into the room to find her teetering on top of a twenty-five foot ladder. I remember being so angry that she could have fallen and broken her neck. She looked at me with her large eyes and called me a silly dragon.”
My exact words I spoke only a short while ago. My voice softens when I say, “I was told brides cannot bear children. Is this true?”
His reply is so low I can barely hear him. “Yes. Only a true mate can bear a dragon.”
His sadness swells within me and it actually hurts. I have no explanation for the deep connection I have with him. It’s like there’s an invisible string attached to our hearts. His vibrates the string and sends messages into mine. I’m being the silly one now, so I speak to help dissolve the very real ache I feel right now. “That is much like it is for beastkind. Well, I guess not exactly. Before we figured it out, beastkind mates could only have sex with humans to procreate. After thousands of years of prejudice against other beastkind species, we discovered different species can mate and produce offspring successfully.”
His response is instant. “No, it is nothing like dragons. If any man touched my bride, before or after me, or if I’m lucky enough one day to mate, it would mean the man’s death.”
One part of his sentence doesn’t quite make sense. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean by before you mate.”
He huffs out a loud breath. “All brides are virgins. It is the only way they have a chance at transcendence to dragon.”
A laugh escapes me. “You’re kidding. Your bride is expected to be a virgin?”
His skin heats under my paws and I know he’s angry. His reply travels through my brain with a sinister feel. “It’s nothing to laugh at. This is why we were cursed to begin with.”
I’m hoping that because he’s still speaking to me he isn’t that mad. “Tell me of the curse, dragon.” Sarn gives a heavy sigh and I know I’m causing him additional irritation, but I cannot contain my curiosity. “Please.”
With another grumble, he begins the story. “Drakon, the king of dragons, fell in love with the daughter of a Goddess. He courted her knowing she was his true mate. When he finally consummated their union, he discovered she had given her virginity to another. He was mated to a woman who would never transcend. In his great rage, he killed her.”
We both remain quiet until he speaks again a few minutes later. “A dragon’s rage is incomparable to anything you’ve ever seen. Mine is worse. You cannot want to be around me if I’m ever in that condition.”
I shift to my human form and stretch out on his neck so I can wrap my arms about him. “Don’t be silly. I trust you. We’re friends.” His scales become too hot for me to touch, so I unwrap my arms and slide down a bit.
“During one of my rages, I all but killed Laryn’s bride. I burned her with my fire and her flesh melted to her bones. The pain I caused her and Laryn cannot be denied. When I tell you to get away from me because I’m going into a rage I mean it.”
His story stuns me. I have trouble believing he would harm a woman. I don’t feel threatened by him in the least. “You said all but killed her.”
“Bastian came to earth’s realm months ago and told me Roxanne, the bride I burned, has transcended to dragon. That’s impossible for you. I am dangerous and out of control in a rage. You cannot trust me at those times. Please promise you will leave when I say.”
I can’t accept this. “And did you lose Calista shortly before this disastrous event happened?”
He doesn’t answer. He flies to the clearing where we started our flight and lands in the center of the copse of trees. His shift is so sudden I have little time to find my balance as my feet hit the ground. I place one hand down to stabilize myself before I stand and face him. His violet eyes blaze from his human face.
Smoke trails from his nostrils and he’s clenching and unclenching his hands. He no longer speaks into my mind and shouts aloud instead. “It matters not. I tried to kidnap Bastian’s son. The only dragon child alive. When Laryn’s bride discovered what I was up to, she tried to stop me. I offered to exchange her freedom for the child’s. And, my intentions were not good. After the child flew away, the foolish woman thought to fight me. She almost paid with her life.” His breathing is deep and heavy as additional smoke escapes his nostrils. “I’m a despicable man and an evil dragon. You should not be my friend or anywhere around me at all. There is no good…” he slams his fist on his chest, “left inside this heart.” He turns and heads toward his cabin.
My poor Sarn. I decide to give him some time alone. He shared many truths with me and we’ve made headway into our friendship. His pain is so deep the least I can do is let him come to terms with all he has told me. Even knowing what he’s capable of, I have no fear of him. I want him like I’ve never wanted another man. My wolf shivers inside me and I feel her yearning too. So, I will never transcend to dragon. We are of two different worlds, but we have time. I would hate to lose out on what we could have. That includes being more than friends. I never thought it would be easy to seduce a dragon, but I will persevere.
Chapter Seven
Sarn
She vexes me so and I need a drink. She has no idea the danger she faces when around me. Until I told her what happened, I’d forgotten for a short time. Forgotten the look and smell of Roxanne’s burned flesh—her whimpers and the devastation on Laryn’s face when he saw what I’d done to his bride.
“Damn she-wolf,” I mutter again. I finally locate my sweats and storm back to the cabin after pulling them on. I’m not at all happy whe
n I see her brother waiting. Are all these beastkind animals without self-preservation? I need my dragon realm where everyone but other dragons fear and bow to me. They wouldn’t dare be waiting in front of our homes with an attitude.
Roland blocks my path when I attempt to charge past him. If he wants to play, I’ll be happy to oblige. He’s not quite as tall or as broad as I am, but he’s still a large guy. Before he suspects what I’m planning, I grab his arm and twist him around. A firm shove sends him to the ground face first. He gazes up from the ground with fire in his eyes and blood streaming from his nose. He spits out a few pine needles and with no hesitation, he’s up instantly and attacking me. We pummel each other because it feels good. I could easily win, but I want the pain his fists offer. And I want to feel my fists sink into flesh. I’m not experiencing rage; I’m having fun and relieving some of my hostility.
He doesn’t give up even when he realizes he can’t possibly win. He’s bloodier than I am and in obvious pain. He’s scrappy and manages to twist away. His foot flies up in a kick to the side of my head that I have no time to block. Blood flies from my lip when his fist makes contact. I shake my head and he kicks me in the belly. I grab his foot and pull it upward so he falls to his back with a loud thud. He twists in an attempt to pull away. If I don’t release his foot, I’ll break it. It would serve him right if I held on, but I have no intention of causing severe damage. He takes my momentary lapse and swipes my legs, which sends me crashing down beside him. I’m ready to jump up and start again, but his hands fall limp at his sides and I allow mine to do the same.
“She’s my sister and I don’t want her hurt,” he says between gasps for breath.
I’m breathing just as heavily. “I can understand that and I don’t want to hurt her.” We are both looking up at the bright blue sky as we speak.
“But you will,” he says softly.
Goddess help me stay away from her. “Yes, I most likely will.”
I turn my head so I’m facing him and he turns to me. His eyes are raw and I hear the pain in his voice. “You expect me to stand by while this happens?”
“No.” I turn away and peer back at the sky. “She’s worth protecting.”
He growls low in his throat. “So what the hell am I to do? I doubt I can kill you.”
My loud sigh fills the air. “It might help if you could keep her away from me.”
Roland laughs, and from the corner of my eye, I see him flash a true smile. “No one has ever been able to stop my sister when she sets her mind to anything.”
I wanted her the first time I saw her. I was drunk off my ass and still she affected me. I also knew she wasn’t like the women who threw themselves my way. It was a conundrum I rarely faced as a dragon. I wanted her, but I did everything I could to stay away. Now, her brother’s words make taking her to bed more real. I’m well aware I’ve only been delaying the inevitable. It’s also not the time to develop a hard-on.
I roll over, gain my feet, and hold my hand out to Roland. “We might as well get to know each other. Why don’t you come inside and get cleaned up. I’m hungry and need to eat. I don’t promise the food will taste any good, but I’ll share.”
Roland takes my offered hand and rises. We walk inside and he uses the bathroom while I clean the blood from my face at the kitchen sink. When I’m presentable, I check the refrigerator. There’s a huge slab of bacon and a dozen eggs. I begin preparing all of it. I also make another pot of coffee.
Roland comes out of the bathroom and stops on the other side of the small island that separates us. “You need to know that my sister loves deeply,” he says while holding a wet cloth to his nose, so his voice is muffled.
Being able to see only his eyes above the cloth, they remind me of Sierra’s eyes. A dark brown chocolate that has a way of reaching into your soul and twisting just a bit. “I love deeply too. I’m sure it’s too deeply.” I have no idea how Roland will take my next question. “Have you been in love?”
He lowers the cloth and regards me intently. “Did she tell you?”
I nod. It’s nice that my hair doesn’t fall in my face any longer. Sierra’s fingers running through my hair was more than nice. What the hell is wrong with me? I regard Roland while trying to control my lust because I’m thinking about his sister. “Yes, if you’re asking if I know that you’re gay.”
I see dread in his eyes but also hope. “It doesn’t bother you?”
I let out a laugh. “Not at all. I’ve found that men and women have trouble resisting my beauty, but if I were you,” I give him a wink, “I would try.”
His smile is like his sister’s too. I’m becoming jealous that they shared a womb.
“Thank you, Sarn,” he says with an appreciative look up and down. “Somehow, I will strive to keep from molesting your gorgeous body.”
I raise my eyebrows appreciating his sense of humor with a subject so delicate for him. “That’s all I can ask. It will be a trying feat, but you need to control yourself as much as possible. Now why don’t you set the table?”
A while later, we eat burned bacon and runny eggs. In a deadpan voice, Roland speaks up after we’ve stuffed ourselves. “We make a good couple.”
In his same level tone, I reply, “If your sister refuses me, you’re next in line.”
He bursts out laughing. “I like you, dragon,” he adds after his laughter subsides and he can speak again.
I’ve enjoyed my time with Roland, but the craving for alcohol is creeping up on me once more and I feel restless. I point toward the door. “Tell me what there is to do around here so I don’t go crazy.”
I think he understands what I’m asking. “The bears seem to get off on chopping wood for no other reason than it’s there. That’s one of the reasons I remain at the nightclub as much as possible.”
The club is the last place I need to be. “I have a sudden aversion to the nightclub atmosphere, so I think it best that you show me the closest ax and wood pile.”
“I can do that, but I’ll leave you to chop wood alone. I need to head back to the club. I work this evening.” He hesitates a moment, but I can see he has something else to say. “I saw my sister riding you earlier.” His face turns scarlet and I bite my lip to hold back my smile. “That sounds horrible... you know what I mean.”
Even his embarrassment reminds me of Sierra. I let him off the hook after a shout of laughter escapes my throat. “Yes, I know what you mean.”
He looks at me, his gaze pleading. “She was happy. I could hear her laugh from far below. I only want her happy.”
I can’t go there because what can I say? I will hurt her, I know it. “She wants the same for you. Living a secret is no way to live.”
Roland studies the floor for a moment then meets my eyes again. “Thank you. Beastkind are not known for tolerance.”
I shake my head. “They still have a lot to learn. From what your sister told me, that is why your kind could not produce children for so long without human interaction.”
“True,” he responds with a hopeful look.
We clean the kitchen and Roland walks me to the nearest wood pile before leaving to go to the club. Chopping wood takes some getting accustomed to. I’ve never chopped wood, but I wasn’t going to reveal that to Roland. It seems fairly straightforward—wood, tree stump, ax. My first few pieces don’t quite look like the ones resting in the existing wood pile, but I get the hang of it quickly. Strange that such a small thing like cutting up wood with an ax gives me a sense of satisfaction. Usually I need a bride’s cry during her release, a stolen treasure, or at the very least—looking out across my realm and knowing it’s mine. I’m not sure what’s happening to me, but I feel good about what I’m doing.
A few hours pass as I chop until my arms are too weary to lift an alcoholic drink. In the distance, I’ve noticed a few she-bears walk out of their way to avoid me. I know they are shy around men. I’d learned this tidbit from the male bears who worked the nightclub. I only met two she-bears wo
rking there and they avoided me too. Those bears seem to be smarter than the average female. I was known for sleeping with any willing woman, drinking too much, and knocking down a few walls when things were at their worst. It’s surprising that Dmitri put up with me as long as he did.
With a solid chop to the last piece of wood in the pile, I put aside the ax. I’d seen a good sized lake while I flew over the bear territory, so I head there to wash the sweat from my sore muscles. I like this mountainous area even though it’s not home. It takes me about thirty minutes to walk overland to the lake. I could shift and be there in a matter of minutes, but I begin feeling melancholy. I have no right to be happy. I deserve the suffering that comes from fighting the desire to shift.
I finally make it to the tall grass that surrounds the lake. It’s a peaceful area with a stunning view of trees and mountains. I shuck my sweatpants and wade in. The water is cool and refreshing. Exactly what I need. I swim out to the deeper section and float while thinking on my sins. There are so many that I’m not even sure where to begin. Burning Laryn’s bride is always at the top of the list. Trying to take Ashrac away from his parents a close second. But my mind wanders to all my past brides. Each beautiful in their own way—forced to be with me and make the best of their fate. I know they loved me, but what choice did they actually have? They couldn’t escape me and I’m sure loneliness guided their hearts as it did mine. Because they are born in claiming years, they are raised differently than other girls in their village. A group of potential brides must wait until the actual claiming to see who the special chosen virgin is. The others go on about their life while a single woman is flown away by me or one of my brother dragons.
We’re not actually brothers by blood but by circumstance. During our lives before the curse, our families were feudal overlords of each realm. Male dragons took women as brides against their will from different realms. It was common to kill any female who wasn’t a virgin. Or if the woman was lucky, she was cast aside and lived in service to the dragon. A dragon’s destiny was to find a mate and produce children to propagate the line. Up until a dragon found a true mate it wasn’t unheard of for dragons to have dozens of brides of varying ages to fulfill their lust.
Dragons Don't Forgive Page 5
