by Jami Alden
“Thanks,” Caroline said, hating the way her voice shook. “I don’t think I could have made it in without you.” God, when had she become so pathetically fragile? She’d been practically self-sufficient since she was a kid, had learned to watch out for herself at a young age. Between her father’s drinking problem and her brother’s run-ins with the law, Caroline’s mother more than had her hands full. It was up to Caroline to take care of herself and the rest of the family.
Her marriage to James must have made her soft. She’d gotten so accustomed to having her needs—most of them anyway—taken care of by someone else, she’d lost her ability to deal. She needed to get it back, and fast, if she was going to get herself out of trouble. No matter how reassuring she found Danny’s presence, she knew she couldn’t completely count on him. He had his own reasons for helping her, and they had nothing to do with getting her out of this mess.
She took off her coat, hung it up, and tried to pull herself together.
Danny stood watching her, that damned inscrutable expression on his face. He was so calm, so immovable, Caroline felt embarrassed at the way she’d shivered and clung to him for the majority of the afternoon. “Thanks for staying with me this afternoon,” she said. “I’m sure you have a lot to take care of, so if you need to go, we can set up a time to meet later this week to discuss—”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said, shrugging out of his leather coat. He brushed against her as he reached for a hanger, releasing his scent into the air. The combination of leather, musk, and soap made her head swim as she breathed him in. She wasn’t sure if his decision to stay was cause for relief or greater panic. When she’d gone to see him at the memorial service, she’d convinced herself that whatever they had was dead and buried. They’d just been a couple of foolish kids who thought they could make a high school romance into happily ever after.
Caroline had told herself she was lucky that they realized they were too immature and too poorly matched before they did something really stupid. Like go through with their engagement and get married. Or God forbid, bring a kid or two into the mix.
Though at the time they broke up, Caroline would have given nearly anything to have had everything turn out differently.
She shoved the well-worn pain aside. It wasn’t the time to reopen old wounds. Her past with Danny was just that, and she needed to remember that, no matter how hot the old chemistry threatened to flare.
She led him into the kitchen and gestured for him to take a seat at the breakfast bar. “Do you want something to eat?” she asked, realizing neither of them had eaten since they went to meet Rachael. Unbidden, an image of Rachael’s broken, bloody body flashed in her brain. “I’m not very hungry,” she said, swallowing back a wave of nausea.
“I’ll help myself if I need anything,” he replied. “Right now I want to get down to business.”
“We need to get everything out on the table,” Danny said, trying to keep his attention on business, instead of on the vulnerable curve of Caroline’s mouth and the terrified look in her eye. All he wanted to do was pull her close and promise her everything would be okay. But he was afraid if he touched her all bets would be off. He took a deliberate step back. “We need to talk about what you found connecting James and my mother. And I want to see those notes.”
She nodded and started out of the kitchen. “Everything’s upstairs.” He got off his stool and she tried to wave him off. “I’ll only be a minute if you want to wait.”
“I’ll come with you,” he said, ignoring her protest. He didn’t want to give her the chance to hide anything if she were so inclined.
He followed her up the stairs to the second floor, trying to ignore the soft curve of her ass against the gray wool of her pants. All those mornings at the gym gave her body a honed, tight look. Still, her ass kept its plump roundness, making him want to reach out and give it a squeeze to see if it was as luscious to the touch as he remembered.
He tucked his hands into his pants pockets and followed her down the hall like he had no idea where he was going. The master bedroom was the same as when he’d seen it last, the silk covered comforter pulled up just so, the throw pillows arranged perfectly on the king size bed. Danny watched her walk into her closet heat pooling in his groin as he tried not to remember the last time he’d seen her in that room.
“Big place for two people,” he said idly as he stood in the doorway of her closet and watched her reach for a handbag tucked in the back corner of a high shelf.
“This was James’s house with his first wife,” Caroline said as she pulled the purse down. Danny didn’t bother to tell her he knew that already, having done such a thorough background check on James Medford he knew the guy’s blood type. “His daughter Kate was still at home the first few years we were married,” she pulled out what looked like a leatherbound book.
“You never wanted to have kids of your own?” Danny could have smacked himself for asking. Why should he care that Caroline, who’d always agreed with Danny that they should have at least three kids, hadn’t bothered to have a family. He raked his gaze down a body that was a good fifteen pounds slimmer than when they’d been together. “Then again, I guess you wouldn’t want to take the risk that kids would ruin your trophy body.”
Caroline’s face went even paler and her mouth pulled into a thin, tight line. “Not that it’s any of your business, but James had a vasectomy. Something he neglected to tell me until after we were married for five years and I started pressing him for a baby.”
Danny shoved back a pang of sympathy. “I guess that’s what you get for marrying for money.”
Hurt flashed in her eyes, but only for a split second. Eyes narrowed, Caroline straightened, summoned up some of the bravado he remembered so well from their youth, and gave him a sharp half smile. “You know what they say. Every marriage is full of compromise.” She held the leather bound book out to him. “Here.”
He looked in puzzlement at the book. Something about the light brown color and gold lettering was familiar. He flipped it open, feeling like he’d taken a kick to the chest when he read the inside front cover.
Property of Anne W. Taggart.
10 Stockbridge Rd.
Atherton, CA 94027
He flipped over a page, saw that the book was a planner, with calendar pages for writing in appointments, notes, and daily checklist. He forced himself to focus on the first entry.
January 1, 1991.
Lose ten pounds
Exercise more
Volunteer more
Be more patient with Joe
Get out more
Danny realized he was looking at a list of New Year’s resolutions written in his mother’s handwriting. It was so…ordinary. Yet so surreal at the same time. How strange after all that time to be looking at his mother’s handwriting. He flipped through more pages, but couldn’t find anything, at first glance, anyway, that would explain how his mother came to be buried alongside another woman in the middle of an open space preserve.
He sat down on the edge of the bed, turning the pages as he felt Caroline’s weight settle in beside him. It was his mother’s book, but it was full of references to him and his brothers. As though Anne Taggart had no life beyond her husband and her boys. But Danny knew differently. He remembered vividly her mysterious absences, afternoons when she was unreachable and unaccounted for with nothing but a vague explanation.
“Are you okay?” Caroline asked, laying a tentative hand on his arm. “I know it must be really weird to see her handwriting after all this time.”
“Weird. Right.” Yeah, that was one way to put it. It was like a voice from beyond the fucking grave. He shook off her hand and shoved himself up from the bed. If he stayed there any longer he was afraid he was going to grab her and bury his head in her shoulder. “I’m fine,” he snapped. “I dealt with all this shit a long time ago. Now I just want to find out what happened.”
Caroline stared at him with wide eyes. Resentment sque
ezed his chest at her knowing, almost pitying look. Like she knew that underneath his bluster, there was a little boy still crying for his mommy.
Fat fucking chance. “Where did you find this?” he finally asked, careful to keep any shred of emotion from creeping into his voice.
“It was in a box of books Kate had taken from her closet. She brought back a bunch of stuff last week to put in storage.”
“And you’ve never seen this before? In the entire time you were married to James?”
Caroline shook her head.
Danny’s eyes narrowed. “Kind of convenient that you only came across it after he was dead.”
Caroline glared right back at him. “I would never keep something like this from you.”
“Not even if it meant protecting your husband?”
“Danny, I would never do that to you and your family,” she said, her voice vibrating with grief that sounded real. He turned away so he could listen without being distracted by those big brown eyes and trembling pink lips. “I know what you went through when your mother disappeared. I never would have kept anything from you, not even to protect my husband. You have to believe that.”
Danny nodded. He could hear the truth in her voice and let it go. “But you would use it as bait to get me to help you.”
Color flooded her face. “Desperate times,” she said, then raised her eyes to his. “I would have given it to you eventually. But I was hoping you would help me.”
He smiled without humor. “Maybe you should be careful what you wish for. So tell me where you found it.”
“It was only after,” she hesitated a few seconds, “he was killed that I really went through everything.” She braced her hands on the mattress and leaned back with a sigh. “James saved everything, and I mean everything. We went through all of it, trying to find something that would give us a clue as to who would want him dead. But we never found anything”
“Who’s we?” Danny asked.
“Me and Kate. She helped me go through everything. Last week when she brought some stuff over here to store, she found a box of books she realized had belonged to James. That’s where I found the date book.”
“And Kate knows nothing about it?”
Caroline shook her head. “She may have seen it, but I don’t think she would understand the significance.”
“Kate was the only one to help you go through James’s things?”
Caroline nodded, frowning in confusion. “She was the only one I trusted to go through his personal stuff.”
Danny stared at the notes scribbled onto various dates, as though he could will the book to give up secrets that had been buried for nearly two decades. “Someone could easily hide information under the guise of helping you. Sometimes people closest to you are the ones who want to hurt you most.”
Caroline sat up straight on the edge of the bed, indignation evident in every line. “Kate would never want to hurt me.”
Danny held up his hands. “I’m not accusing her of anything. I’m just trying to get all the information I can.”
Caroline’s phone rang. “Speak of the devil,” she said as she looked at the display, shooting him a glare as she picked up the phone. “Hi Kate.”
He listened to her half of the conversation with one ear as he continued to scan the appointment book. Nothing but notes on groceries for the housekeeper to pick up, errands to run, appointments, various sports games Danny and his brothers had scheduled that she probably wouldn’t attend. Normal, everyday things you’d expect to find in the calendar of an affluent stay-at-home-mother.
“No, I’m okay. Really. No, you don’t have to stay with me. I don’t want to put you out.” Caroline’s eyes flicked in Danny’s direction. “It had nothing to do with me. Just the wrong place at the wrong time.” She rang off and met Danny’s questioning look.
“You haven’t told her about the notes?”
“Not the most recent one.” Caroline pocketed her phone and twisted her fingers in front of her. “She’s got enough on her plate with school and Michael. I don’t want to worry her anymore. Did you find anything in there?” She tilted her chin toward the book. “I’ve already been through it twice, but couldn’t find anything about James, or anything related to James. Maybe it’s just a dead end.” Her shoulders slumped, and he fought the urge to give them an encouraging rub.
Or even better, he could close the last few inches between them, lay her across that big bed and spend the next few hours making them both forget the rest of the world. Heat pooled between his legs and he licked his lips as the idea took hold. Maybe he could get some extra benefits out of their renewed acquaintance.
He saw the flash of awareness in her eyes right before they flicked nervously from his gaze. Her fingers shook a little as she brushed back a curl that had escaped from her sleek ponytail.
Yeah, she was feeling it too, the crazy chemistry that had erupted long ago in his teenage bedroom and had lain dormant until then. All it needed was a whiff of oxygen and it was roaring to life, white hot and undeniable.
Don’t do it, man. She’s nothing but trouble for you. She ate you up and spit you out before. What makes you think she won’t do it again?
But he was older by over a decade and infinitely wiser. He knew the difference between sex and love. Mainly that sex was an enjoyable way to pass some time with a woman and did a decent job keeping his thoughts from creeping over to the dark side, while love was a word people liked to throw around and use as an excuse for acting like a bunch of jackasses.
He’d been there, done that, and sure as shit wasn’t going back for more.
So why not add another dimension to his working relationship with Caroline? He hadn’t had a problem walking away from a woman since she’d left him. She wouldn’t be any different.
She knew exactly what was on his mind if the pulse beating in her throat and the flush across her cheekbones was any indication. Danny was pierced by a sudden, vivid memory of that same flush staining the creamy skin of Caroline’s stomach as her orgasm hit. By the time she’d finished coming, her tits would be suffused in the same rosy pink, the perfect backdrop to her diamond hard nipples.
He started to reach for her but before he could even get his hand up she darted away, skittering toward the door with her hands in her pockets, her eyes fastened to the floor like some secret to the universe was hidden in the pattern of her area rug. “You said you found some information too, about my husband. Maybe if we go through the book and you tell me what you found, we’ll figure out the connection.”
My husband. Two words, and his cock shriveled like a prune. Danny thought of James Medford, his aging hands all over Caroline’s body on that enormous bed, and was afraid his balls were going to climb into his abdominal cavity. “Let’s go downstairs and I’ll tell you what we found.”
Caroline fought the urge to fan herself as she led him back downstairs. Her whole body felt lit from within. Amazing how his gray eyes could go from stone cold to liquid mercury in a split second. And that look still had the same devastating effect it had had on her when she was sixteen. Innocently wandering into his bedroom like a baby deer into a lion’s den. He’d lured her over under the guise of tutoring him in calculus, but Caroline was the one who’d received an education. Up until that night, she’d barely been kissed, awkward, mildly pleasant interactions of lips and tongue. By the time she left Danny’s room that night she’d been throbbing in places she didn’t even know she had, clinging to her virginity by the skin of her teeth.
Dwelling on memories like that could only lead to trouble. She needed to get away from him, away from the bed for God’s sake, before she did something royally stupid. It was a below the belt shot to bring up James, but thank God it had worked to distract him. Caroline liked to think she was older, wiser, and much more in control of her libido than she’d been as a hormonal sixteen-year-old. But she knew if Danny pushed it, she’d end up naked under him, over him, any which way he wanted her.
She ordered her body to cool down as she led him back to the kitchen and gestured for him toward the loveseat and armchairs that made up a sitting area in one corner. During the day, light flooded the kitchen through the windows and skylight, creating a sunny pocket of warmth where Caroline loved to sit and read or sketch plans for her latest project.
Danny ignored her and went straight for the refrigerator. “Do you mind?” he said over his shoulder as he pulled out a package of chicken breasts and a head of broccoli from the refrigerator. “All of a sudden I’m starving.”
“Can I help you find something?” Caroline called as he opened and shut cabinets, banging around in her kitchen like he owned the place. He ignored her, bent to open a door, and straightened with her spaghetti pot, which he quickly filled with water and put on the stove.
“I have some frozen lasagna and other stuff in the freezer if that’s easier.”
But Danny was rummaging in her pantry for more supplies. “Don’t tell me you still eat that shit,” he grimaced. “I told you that shit’s worse than army chow.”
Caroline couldn’t hold back a smile at the memory. Danny had been appalled when Caroline had opened the freezer at her parents’ house to reveal shelf after shelf filled with TV Dinners and Hot Pockets, and barely any other food in the house. Danny was obviously still an avid, though messy—she winced as a glug of oil sloshed over the side of the sautee pan onto her immaculate stove—cook.
Within minutes the water was heating and her kitchen was full of the aroma of garlic, chicken, broccoli, and whatever herbs he’d dug out of her spice cabinet. Her stomach, previously sour from stress and too much police station coffee, grumbled in appreciation.
“Did you know that James’s wife had land up in the Santa Cruz mountains?” Danny said and came to take a seat across from her.
Caroline frowned, trying to keep up with the swift change in subject. “No. Like I told you, after she died everything went into a trust for Kate to be managed by James.” Upon his death, control of the trust had passed to Caroline. “I haven’t looked at it closely recently, but I don’t remember any other property in the trust.”
