by Jayne Blue
“I’m not okay.”
She paused and shook her head no. Like she was about to say something and wanted to stop herself.
“In a million years, I would never want to say this. Or ask it.”
“What?”
“I need your help, and the MC too.”
“I would do anything for you. You should know that.”
“How the hell would I know that?” She spat the words at me. It stung. But it was true. I’d been out of her life without a word. She hadn’t been able to lean on me. Not for one damn thing since I left her.
“You wouldn’t.”
Lyric had the upper hand in all of this. Whatever this was. There wasn’t really one thing I could say in my own defense.
“I need to tell you something important.”
“Okay.”
“Hugo is my son, not my brother.” Her eyes filled with tears. I wanted to reach out and wipe them away.
“I sort of figured that. You’re an awesome mom. It’s easy to see that. He seems like a great little guy.”
My mind was racing, doing the math.
Why was she here telling me this when just a few short days ago she’d lied about it? She’d pushed me out of her store.
“He is a great little guy. We’ve been on our own. And he’s just the best thing that has ever happened to me. Or ever will. I would do anything for him.”
“I know. I can see that.” I didn’t want to push. But the reason she came was coming into focus. Or I thought it was.
“He’s in danger. I think he is in danger. No, I know he is. That’s why I need you. Why I came to the MC. I went to Jenny at the Port Az Police and they say, since this threat, or whatever it is, was from someone we know, they can’t do anything until something worse happens. But Jenny knew. She knew I wasn’t over-reacting. Shit. This is all my fault. I should never have encouraged him.”
Lyric had never lost her cool. Even when I saw her stare down Dougie and Arnie at the end of her shotgun, she’d had it together. If she was ever scared, I’d never seen it. And yet she was on edge, rambling. She was coming apart.
“Lyric, Jenny’s right. You’ve got me. You’ll always have me. And my brothers, the MC. No one can hurt you. Who is it? What kind of friend or boyfriend would be try to hurt you and Hugo?”
“He’s not a friend, he’s a customer at my store. You saw him the other day.”
I knew it. I fucking knew it. It was always The Hawks.
“That fucking Hawk. I told you dammit. I told you he was no good. Shit.”
I was right about that Hawk. And it didn’t make me happy to be right.
“There’s more.”
“Okay.”
Lyric wiped her tears away. She took a deep breath. I could see her pull herself together. The strong, determined girl I knew had transformed herself into a formidable woman. She sat up straighter. I waited for her to finish.
“He’s your son too.”
My mind flashed to the face of that little boy. He’d flexed his muscles at me. I recognized his face because it was my own.
I told myself he looked like Lyric, with her dark hair. He had massive amounts of that shiny dark hair. But his face was mine.
I felt sick in my stomach. I’d missed every moment. I’d left Lyric to protect our boy. The days, the months, and the years – all of it had played out without me.
“You did this all alone.”
I wanted to say I was sorry but it wasn’t enough. It was a useless word.
I’d left Lyric and my son. They’d fended for themselves while I was off doing E.Z.’s dirty work.
“I’m not alone. I have, I had my mother, during my pregnancy, Papus is still with me, and my stores. My friends. I’m not alone.”
She was defiant. She wore her independence like I wore my patches.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I knew that answer too.
“I had no way to get to you. You didn’t answer your phone. You didn’t explain anything or call or write. Nothing.”
“You could have come here. To the MC.”
“And say what? One of your bikers knocked me up? Can you help? I did just fine without you or your Dark Saints.”
“I know. I know you did. You did more than fine without me. But can you let me explain?”
“No. I don’t want to hear it. It’s too late. It’s over. The most important thing now is Hugo. I want this fucking Hawk out of our lives. You and The Saints can help me now.”
“Did he hurt Hugo?” New levels of rage, worry, love, and protectiveness were erupting in my gut. Was that why she was here? Did This Hawk hurt my boy?
“No.”
I eased a little. “Get me up to speed.”
Lyric told me what Hex was up to. He was stalking them. He was playing with them. He was doing it in Saint territory. Right in front of our noses.
I brought Maddox, Tracy, Jen, and Benz back into the room. In turn, they also brought in Axle. If it was a club mission, Axle needed to deploy The Saints.
And it was a club mission.
“This is a club effort, Lyric. Bo, you’re staying at Lyric’s until we get it sorted.”
Axle could have been a general, I swear, but he was a Dark Saint. And right now I was fucking thankful as hell for that. Though his idea of me staying at Lyric’s had her immediately pissed.
“I don’t need Bo at my apartment. Isn’t that overboard?”
“One of the guys needs to be inside,” Jenny told Lyric.
I appreciated the interference. If I’d have suggested the plan, I was pretty sure Lyric would have tried to continue to argue about it.
As it was Jenny, being Port AZ PD, and Tracy, shoring up Jenny’s points, Lyric went along. She trusted these women, and they trusted The Saints.
I was going to plant myself at her store, in her life, at her side.
And The Saints were going to be sure that The Hawks knew exactly who they were messing with because they’d decided to cross this line into Lyric’s life.
17
Lyric
* * *
Dark Saints were patrolling my store. Every half hour, a Harley rolled by Bohemian Wraps City and Wilde at Home.
I knew other businesses in town preferred having The Saints on the streets. I’d made it my mission to survive without the local muscled army.
And yet, here I was. Grateful to see them pass my store and round the block.
I did not feel the same about Bo Parker in my space.
He walked into the store and got a million long stares from my staff. Bri came down from our apartment with my sweet Hugo. I would need Hugo to trust Bo and not Hex.
“Hugo, you remember Mr. Parker?”
“Call me Bo. My name’s Bo.”
“That’s kind of a funny name.”
“Hugo!” I scolded him for being rude.
“No, it is. But it’s short for an even funnier name. Beauregard!”
Hugo collapsed into peals of giggles at that news. I tried to restore some sort of distance between Hugo and Bo. But already Hugo was fascinated by the big man. I tried not to wince knowing how much Hugo needed a father figure. I had failed in that regard.
I had shut down any man who tried to get close to me. Now the one time I let down my guard, I had a frigging stalker and a live-in security guard. My carefully constructed reality was going to shit.
“So, Bo here is going to provide security at the store.”
I was trying to be as cold and business-like as possible. I didn’t want to turn this into a family reunion. I didn’t want to make this some sort of life-defining event for Hugo. I wanted Bo to get Hex out of my life. And then do the same.
I didn’t want to think about what I’d unleashed by asking for help. I just wanted us safe. I wanted Hugo safe, physically and emotionally.
“Why don’t you show me your room?”
“For security!” Hugo said and grabbed Bo by the hand. I wanted to stay at their heels. I wanted to separate them. And yet I
didn’t. Watching Hugo tug Bo toward the stairs was the sweetest thing I’d ever seen. Dammit.
I remember I used to wonder what Bo was like as a boy. My heart broke when he shared the abusive stories. The way he’d been shunted between foster homes was a crime. I wanted to protect the boy that Bo was.
And in a way, I had that now. I could give Hugo the love that Bo never got. I could not give Bo that love. It was too late for that.
Hugo gave Bo the grand tour, and eventually Bri showed up to help take my boisterous boy off Bo’s hands. He did have a job to do. Bo told me he wanted to be sure that every lock was secure. Then, he got to work on stronger measures.
“You remember how I told you that each of The Saints has a particular set of skills?”
“Yes, I do. How’s that carpentry coming?”
I was being a bitch. I had no idea what Bo had been up to in five years. Maybe he had been building homes? By the look of him, though, he’d been up to something much darker. Life had hardened him more than it had me. The mean part of my heart said, Good, he should suffer for not being with me.
“I’ve done my share of swinging hammers.”
It was a cold, flat statement. It was a prediction of what Hex could expect.
“How’s that going to help?”
“I’ve got one of the brothers, Sparks, coming in here to wire a security camera system.”
I knew I probably should have had that anyway.
“Sparks the electrician? Really?”
Bo didn’t laugh at my joke so I moved on. “How much? Let me get my checkbook.” I didn’t want a single free thing from Bo.
“It’s on me.”
“No, this is my business. I run it my way. If we need a security upgrade, I’ll do it.”
“I’ll send you a bill.” I had no doubt he wouldn’t.
The work around my place happened fast.
There were Saints on patrol, Saints with power tools, and one Saint sitting in the corner, watching me. Bo, who’d been completely absent from my world was there, everywhere. I tried to steel myself against the way that made me feel.
I replayed the heartbreak in my mind. I replayed how I’d gone to child birthing classes with my mom. I replayed how I’d held my toddler’s hand at her funeral. There was no way Bo Parker could make up for any of those moments.
Still, I wanted to find out why he’d dumped me. Why he never called. I knew there was a huge part of his story and mine that didn’t have an ending. It just fell off and went in another direction. Or had I made too much of everything that summer. I had been a fool at eighteen. I had been in love, or lust. Maybe I was one of those idiots that confused the two.
All of the things that I thought were firmly tucked away in my life were bursting at the seams. I had been in a panic since I’d found those tickets to Legoland clutched in Hugo’s chubby fingers.
I’d gone from tucking Hugo in, to a late-night visit to the police, to visiting a motorcycle club, to bringing a biker security force into my store. What the fuck was happening to my life?
As I closed for the day, it dawned on me that I hadn’t slept. I’d been up twenty-four hours. I’d been on high alert that entire time, too. It was all catching up with me.
I called over to Wilde at Home.
“I’m going to put Hugo to bed. Then close up here. Can you finish closing there?”
The Dark Saints had taught my two assistant managers and me how to enact a new temporary security system they had set up. I was told the “real deal” was on the way.
“Yep, I’ll turn on the new Mission Impossible Cameras. Not even Tom Cruise will be able to get in here.”
I laughed. It did seem like overkill and The Saints were just getting started. Was Hex this much of a threat?
Again, I reminded myself, nothing was too much when it came to keeping my Hugo safe.
I popped upstairs, and found Hugo ready to go to sleep after our crazy twenty-four hours.
“Mommy, that Bo. He’s nice.”
“Oh yeah? Did he tell you not to talk to Hex?”
“Yeah, I won’t ever again.”
“Good. And no wandering off. You stay with me or Bri or even Bo.”
“Bo picked me up with his muscles.”
I laughed at that.
“He must be strong, because you’re getting so big!” I nuzzled his cheek and kissed him goodnight.
“Mommy.”
“Yes.”
“Can I ride on Bo’s bike? It’s very shiny.”
“We’ll talk about it tomorrow. But only if you promise me to go to sleep and stay asleep.”
“I promise. And tomorrow a motorcycle!”
“We’ll see.” I shook my head and turned off his light.
How was I going to unring this bell? Even my staff was noticing how much Hugo looked like Bo. I closed his door and walked down the short hallway to the large open space that was the rest of my apartment. I’d renovated it a year ago after Papus moved out and it was starting to look more like me and less like the place I grew up in.
Bo walked in and scared me half to death.
“You didn’t tell me you were taking Hugo up here.”
“I didn’t know I needed to.” I shook my head, not unlike the way I had with Hugo a second ago.
Bo looked imposing standing in the middle of my kitchen.
“I need to know where you both are. All the time.”
He also looked scared. Something I’d never seen before. I softened. I’d had five years to get used to constant panic of having a kid. He’d had twenty-four hours.
“Well, we’re always here, or at school, or sometimes we do deliveries. That’s pretty much it.”
Bo wasn’t amused at my rundown of our lives.
“Hex is no joke. Until I get my hands on him, you need to be serious.”
“I’d say going to the police and then you, well, that’s an indication of how serious I am.” I walked over to the kitchen counter and grabbed a bottle of wine. I was overtired, overstressed, and a little red was in order, I’d decided.
“You want a drink? I have beer in the fridge too.”
“No. I need to be awake and alert.”
“Roger that.”
I poured my wine with flair. As weird as it was to have Bo here, there was also a strange sense of relief. It felt good to know there was another person that would absolutely put himself between my son and danger.
And he was a fucking beast. Something lifted off my shoulders that I didn’t know was pressing down on them. The weight of being the only one shifted onto Bo’s formidable shoulders. I tried not to like that. But it felt good. I softened just the tiniest bit towards the biker who’d broken my heart.
“Well, you can sit with me at least.”
“Yes, for a minute.”
We sat for a second. I tried not to gulp my wine. I also tried not to want Bo to hold me. I remembered all too well what that felt like. How I’d melted in his arms that long ago summer.
“Where were you?” I blurted it out.
“A lot of places. Wherever the MC sent me.”
“Why did you leave me? Was I just a fling?”
I didn’t mean to be so direct. I was trying to tell myself I didn’t care about those answers and here I was.
I tried not to act hurt or like I really cared. But I did. I had spent the last five years believing that he’d used me until he was bored. That Bo Parker had bolted when it got real enough to meet my family.
I’d spent the last five years thinking I was a stupid and naïve girl who paid the price of falling head over heels in love with a player.
Was I that wrong about what had happened between us. Was I still wrong?
“Lyric. I loved you. I still love you.”
“Please don’t say that. You’re making fun of me. And you don’t know what love is. I do.”
“I had to leave. For my MC.”
“So you chose your friends over me? That’s not really love, pal.”
&nb
sp; “No. It wasn’t like that.”
“How was it then?” I spit the words at him. I was opening all the wounds that I’d struggled for so long to heal.
“You remember those two thugs who held you up at Wilde Pawn?”
It was like he completely changed the subject. What did that have to do with anything I was asking him? I lashed out my answer.
“Uh, yeah, I remember. Some people meet on Tinder, we met over a shotgun.”
A small smile played at his lips at my analogy. I didn’t want to laugh. I wanted to rage at him.
“Dougie and Arnie were their names. The club had me run them out of town. Which I did.”
“So?”
“They turned up dead, both murdered.”
“Oh my God.”
Had Bo killed them? Was my summer with a biker much darker than I even knew?
“I didn’t do it. I roughed them up. I taught them a lesson. But I didn’t kill them.”
“Who did?”
“I don’t know. E.Z., the Prez of the MC, saved me from the cops. The only evidence for the murders was security video. One from when they tried to knock over Wilde Pawn, and then the other, outside of Cups. It was clear as day me kicking the shit out of them.”
“But if you didn’t do it, if that was the only evidence, you didn’t need to run.”
My mind went back to my memories of those two men.
I was the one who’d turned over the tape to the police. And I’d never heard from them again. I thought that they’d gotten out of town, just like Bo said they should.
“I was the only suspect. They were dead. And I was a Saint. They were Hawk newbies, low level, but Hawks.”
“What does that all mean?”
“It meant I had to run. E.Z. told me the club voted that I needed to disappear for a while. Until the heat was off about the murders. And because the Hawks would want war if they thought The Saints killed their guys.”
“Jesus Christ.”
It sounded medieval to me. A fucked-up biker Shakespeare.
“Why didn’t you fight it? I could have helped you. We could have figured it out.”
I was crying. Shit. I didn’t want to cry.
“The last thing I wanted was that shit to blowback on you. You needed to go away to college and get out of Port Az. You didn’t need a man suspected of double homicide as your fucking boyfriend when you tried to move away to school. I did it for you as much as the club.”
