by Simon Archer
Bunnygirls II
A Bunnygirl Harem Adventure
Simon Archer
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
29. Spearmonger
Author’s Note
1
Exhausted. If I had to have picked one word for how I was as the Baron of Thumperton Port, that would be it. Not always in a bad way. The night before had been a bit wilder than others, and the bunny girls indentured to my service were particularly eager to show their affections this time. Having spent other nights gladly attending to their desires on an individual level, I’d spent tonight with all of them together, and now they’d come to expect quite the experience from me. So, yes, “exhausted” was a good word for how I felt cracking my eyes open that morning.
Advised by my sore muscles, I settled on indulging myself to just rest in bed for another hour, enjoying the warmth my bunnies were giving me. Hopper at one side, Tinker at the other, two more at my legs, Lola and Jessica, and Cecily on my chest, with several others curled around me from there, I was perfectly fine laying there forever. The bed was freshly rebuilt, the mattress freshly restuffed, and the silk sheets newly woven, making the newly refurbished room in Thumperton Keep a veritable heaven. I had almost ordered the bed made smaller than when the Baron had it, thinking I wouldn’t have needed the equivalent of four king-sized mattresses for myself, but Hopper’s and Tinker’s suggestion to keep it was the right one. No part of the mattress was going unused then.
Eventually, though, I had to get up. It was still early enough in the morning that I could still clean up and get ready before my butler Bugs felt the need to come to find me. Breaking out of the sarcophagus of love, to the half-awake displeasure of the bunnies as I roused them, I navigated the minefield of grasping arms and moans to get to the bath in the bathhouse. When I opened the door, three bunnies rushed inside, preparing the hot water for me in advance. On other nights, I had insisted that I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself, but they were adamant about helping me with absolutely everything.
Every night, regardless of what had happened in the day or the night previous, all of them determined to keep me from exerting a calorie of effort in my self-care routine. They even traded off some nights. I heard whispers of a schedule for it. Sometimes I felt a little bit like a child, having everything done for them because they were incapable, but they told me it was only proper for a lord.
“Just because you can doesn’t mean a lord should,” they said. “We’re so grateful and appreciative,” “Please let us thank you properly,” “We want you to know how happy we are,” they kept on repeating, on and on.
After the fifth day of that, I bought that they were really just happy to help me out, so I had stopped fighting it. I submitted to the routine, letting them attend to getting the soap and bath brushes. When they weren’t having bubble fights and sword duels with them, they cleaned me, too. I know, nothing was left up to me to struggle for. They really enjoyed being thorough with their hands the most, often ignoring the bath brushes in favor of them. I wasn’t complaining. It gave me time to relax and think, really let my mind wander about while still being productive.
I knew I was still doing good work, and good work always put a smile on my face, no matter how much I ached at the end of the day, or at the beginning of the next. As a handyman back in my world, those were always good days. Friendly clients, solid work, reliable payments, all made the pain fade away. Dealing with honest people, getting interesting stories, and breathing in that fresh air, I wouldn’t have changed much about any of it. But, it did get a little monotonous after a while. No matter how varied and diversified your client base and ‘portfolio’ was, there were only so many kinds of jobs people needed a guy like me for. Eventually, I’d seen it all, and even the tougher and more life-threatening jobs could have dragged on with how predictable they were.
It never stopped, either. No matter how many rodents or predators you cleared out, no matter how many pipes you cleared or gutters you cleaned, no matter how much you worked your hands until they were like sandpaper, there was always another job, like nothing you ever got done stayed done. I was feeling less like an outdoorsman and more like the maid, just cleaning up messes only for them to get dirty again. And it’s not like I wasn’t appreciative of how grateful some of my clients were for my work. I really was. I guess I just found myself wanting work that made a difference. Something that made it so everyone could live a better life. Some real change. The differences I was making weren’t really going to last longer than I would. As soon as I hit the dirt, everything I did would hit it with me. But that was life, sometimes. I had to stay satisfied with the change I made in the little things. For a while, that was almost enough.
After a while, though, I realized I was always alone. Living on my own for so long, I’d forgotten how much I missed having people near, not just being chatty with a client or that occasional call from a friend you hadn’t seen in a while. A real connection with people I could trust, where I could just rest my heart and be myself for a while. After a while, though I was fine with talking with regular people, it took something out of me over time. I needed a recharge.
Then I got hit by a flying bunny girl from another world, and the next minute, that same bunny girl had flung me into a world full of an almost alien race of Rabbit people being oppressed by another race of Wolves. I was establishing my own lordship, gathering property, growing a pack of Wolf soldiers, fighting monstrous Wolf nobles, and reclaiming a city from the evil royals that made it a gilded hell, with plans to do the same to everywhere else. I was making a difference. Not only was I making things safer for the bunnies and hares that I freed, but I was also helping both them and the Wolves who followed me to come together within my estate. They were starting to like each other, even with all of the dark history before. The Rabbits were learning to trust, and the Wolves were learning some much-needed humility. I hoped they might keep going after I was gone. Not to say that we didn’t have problems. Rabbits weren’t much use in a fight, especially the male hares, and the Wolves were as stupid as they were stubborn.
Especially the nobility, who were almost always a problem. When I took over as Baron, having claimed the city he owned as my spoils of a Wolf challenge, the nobles who were now working for me didn’t take kindly to the fact that a ‘Rabbit’ was leading them. I was human, but that wouldn’t have mattered to them even if I explained it as thoroughly as possible. I wasn’t a Wolf, and therefore my position above them was an insult. That was going to be a problem. One that I rectified with some decisive if brutal action and punishment.
The big thorn in the side was finding everyone who wasn’t going to be conducive to the new management. None of them were going to outright say that they were planning to eat bunnies behind my back. That was unless it was much more profitable for them to do so. Finding dissidents in my tribe was like any other hunt with camouflaged prey. If they were better at hiding than I was at finding, I just had to draw them out with something they wanted more than not being seen.
My mind drifted to the time when I’d implemented my solution. I proposed a fake, hypothetical bribe to convince them that I wanted to keep them around, offering a generous host of handpicked bunnies from the Baron’s supply’ and a chunk of the Baron’s old property to whatever Wolf wanted it. They were also told they’d have been completely exempt from the ban on eating bunnies I was putting on everyone else in the town. My fictional bunny auction was to be a public event, I had told them, and I encouraged everyone to come and gather in the courtyard of the fortress. Those who didn’t still didn’t want to stay in the city were going to be given a farewell gift of a few bunnies anyway, picked after the other nobles had taken ‘their share’ of the spoils, as a show of my understanding and magnanimous nature. With my sheepish display, I had them all thinking I was trying to kiss their asses with something I was willing to give up since a Rabbit lord couldn’t eat bunnies like they did, and they had no solid concept of a libido. Some were even trying to drive up the price for staying, informing me of just how grave an insult they were overlooking in this exchange and trying to hustle me, of all people, out of my bunnies.
Suffice to say, most of the nobles and elites, and even some grunts looking to gain some free status, jumped on the bandwagon like it was a Black Friday sale. The Blood Moon was coming up quickly, and every boost in the bunnies they could use in the feast was a boon. The time came, and I gave them all, including the Wolves in the crowd around, a chance to rethink the decision. None of them caught my subtextual threats to their lives if they proceeded with the auction. Even the ones who seemed to have brains in their skulls didn’t turn them on to see what a blatant trap I’d set for them.
They poured into the courtyard like fish into a barrel, and I had the gate closed, with the ‘let’s keep the plebeians out’ excuse to pacify my unassuming victims. We blocked the exits, locked the gate, manned the rooftops with gunners, and when they realized that, the hope for survival drained from their faces, replaced with the fire of my magical shotgun. Some might have said that I rigged the battle royale by having the gunners shoot them from above, and I would have told them that the real unfair advantage was bringing Hopper and Tinker along to fight on my side. As a sportsman, I gave them some weapons to defend themselves, so it would have counted as a real challenge. Nevermind that they were all made of wood on purpose. That was purely a deliberate coincidence.
And, just like that, I’d tripled my land holdings and my pack. However, I still had a few nobles left in the city who still had Wolves underneath them. Obviously, I couldn’t have that either, so I laid claim to their property, pack members, and slaves for my own as their Baron. Any who refused were to fight me in a challenge, with the bonus of claiming the Barony from me if they won. They all refused me. They all lost. Some of their grunts refused me. They also lost. Those who didn’t submit died. Still as stubborn as ever, none of the grunts who challenged me survived, and only two nobles would work for me and keep their hands off the Rabbits. I gave them positions away from any of the hares or bunnies, of course, until they proved themselves truly willing to cooperate.
After all of that, I had wanted to take a battalion to find the Mana Crusher Field generator as quickly as possible and save the bunny inside of it. However, the only information I had on it was that it wasn’t local, and it was the only generator around. Maybe I could have searched from city to city to find some clues if I had all of the time in the world to find it. I had no idea when this stupid Blood Moon the nobles were so obsessed with was happening, only that it was happening soon, so I couldn’t waste any time. At the absolute luckiest, I could have found the Mana Crusher within a week, but it would have no doubt been fortified like Fort Knox. I didn’t have the intel or the forces to crack a Fort Knox.
Plus, I had a champion challenger coming from the Regent to take care of. If I wasn’t here to deal with him, he’d wreck my city, and I’d have taken the bulk of the forces away already. The Regent sent him, so he’d know things about him, about the Mana Crusher, and about the Blood Moon, which would help immensely. And if he was important, which was fair to assume for an operative designed to replace the leader of a whole city, he’d have pack members I could collect when I killed him. But I’d have to wait for him to get here to get all of that.
Between the risk for my city in exchange for the most minute chance to find the bunny now and not have the power to save her, or the risk of some wasted time while I protected my city with a much better chance of finding the bunny with the power to save her, I opted for the latter and waited.
So, it was reform and reconstruction time for the whole city in the meantime. With the last Baron’s hands-off approach to leading the city, everything was a mess. Every building had to be refurbished, repurposed, staffed, and supplied to help the city practically from scratch. Some of them weren’t even being used, and all of the stuff inside had rotted away. Fortunately, with the Wolves and Rabbits now working together, their crazy strength and skills paired together made the remodeling a cinch. Less than a week, and all of the new clinics, housing, markets, flooded the city. I know, I was amazed, too. They weren’t totally finished, but they were sturdy enough to use while all of the work continued.
And I had to do all of it with almost no wood. Before I came to power, the last Baron had cut all of the trees down and sold them all to other cities. With some foragers, we got some seeds growing, so maybe we’d have a forest later on. The ranches, the ones that were also ‘spas,’ that I had just outside the city were converted into two large regular ranches, along with the other food ranches and farms around the area. Or at least, they were starting to be. Even with super strength Wolves and speedy Rabbits, everything took time.
I even had a training ground built so Hopper, my warrior bunny who could kick a boulder into orbit as well as make portals in the air, could train my Wolves to fight better. She just had a natural intuition about fighting, developing new techniques and skills on the fly, and improving them with every battle she fought in, but she’d never put that intuition to good use before she joined up with me. Her record of Wolves downed since becoming a part of my household more than put her above any handful of the Wolves combined. The boys never once took her down in any sparring match, but they lasted longer and longer as time went on, a few of the better warriors among them getting a scratch or two in before they fell within a few seconds. Every improvement counted.
Tinker, who could make magical charms to give weapons special properties and memorize any schematic and book she’s ever read, was teaching everyone to read at a school I commissioned as well. No one could read the Cuniculus language, even me. That was a problem. The Wolves weren’t learning so fast, but the Rabbits got the hang of it pretty quick within the week. In her off time, she would make more charms, supplying more and more magic weapons for the troops to use. Some of the bunnies had some fairly capable knowledge of their own beforehand and helped her out with her tasks as assistants. Probably gained that knowledge because the old Baron had them making charms for him. Or for something else, but more on that later.
Like I said before, exhausting, just in the volume of things I had to keep track of all of the time on all of the days. But it wasn’t without its perks. My servants were happy and chipper to work for my estate and help rebuild the city. My Wolves were actually just as joyful, if not a bit more subdued about it, as they guarded my things and scouted my lands. Things were actually pretty good.
And I had lots and lots and lots of bunnies. Yes, indeed. I could have trained for a lifetime and not felt prepared for all of Hopper’s, Tinker’s, and their appetites. Just attending to them took up all of my nights. In the best way, of course. The best, most exhausting, most satisfying way.
Before I even knew it, I was out of the tub, cleaned, dried, and dressed in all of my clothes. While they insisted on helping me with my routines and treating me like a lord, I insisted on keeping my overalls and flannel-patterned shirt as part of my lordly ensemble. I didn’t care that lor
ds were usually wearing those puffy shirts or silk pants; I was heading to work, just like the servants and soldiers, so I was going in my work clothes. My role linchpinned the operation and function of everyone who served me under a common goal, nothing more.
I still wore Hopper’s specially made navy blue coat over it all because it was a good look, and she worked hard on making it that way. I was pretty tall, had some big shoulders, and a barrel chest, which I knew could be difficult to measure for. She made the fit perfectly and embroidered the gold trim and beautiful artwork of Wolves, Rabbits, as well as the fancy new royal seal of my household on the back: Three hands, A Wolf’s and a Rabbit’s on the sides, and a human’s below, holding a hammer, soup ladle, and musket respectively and crossing the tools near the top of the circle. I was going to leave out the human hand in the design since I was the only human, but it looked a bit like a Soviet Union flag then. That didn’t seem like the creative direction to shoot for, so we kept the third hand.
The beard was freshly trimmed, along with the dirty-blonde hair, the pearly whites were sparkling, and the guns were loaded up, another insistence of mine. A magic sawed-off shotgun, .45 pistol, and .700 hunting rifle were a must in a dangerous political landscape of monstrous nobles who literally kill to gain property. I felt ready for another day as a baron. My girls were finally getting ready and dressed as I headed out the door.
“Alright, ladies.” I bid the bunnies farewell, stretching out the neck and shoulders a bit to ease some of that sore tension, “I’m off to go do lord things. We’ve taken too long as it is, and there are places for all of you to be.”
