by Cassie Mae
“There are snacks for that one”—Katie nods to her daughter—“in the bag. And there’s a Lunchable since she’s a picky princess, aren’t ya?” Claire grins at the tease in her mom’s voice before she hides from Cooper’s wide smile by using her dad’s shoulder. “She won’t eat anything you cook for her.”
“Oh trust me,” I say over my nephew’s head, locking a teasing glance on Cooper. “I don’t blame her.”
They laugh at Cooper’s expense, though they really have no clue just how true that statement is. Jim takes a long look at Katie before turning to Claire and saying, “You be a good girl?”
“Daddy, font boofrom.”
“I gotta. Mommy needs some alone time.”
“Bur hafta timey oot.”
“I know.” Jim nods to me and my very lost expression. “Auntie Maya will let you, I’m sure.”
Cooper raises a brow at me, and boy am I grateful that I’m not the only one without the toddler dictionary.
Claire pats my brother’s cheeks, squishing them together so she can slap a sloppy kiss there. I cringe, thoughts of how I once caught that little girl licking the plunger drifting into my head. It’s surprising to me how Jim can be so liberal with that, yet he has to shave twice a day.
My gaze flicks to Cooper, and dare I say he looks almost sad as he watches the exchange. I saw the same expression in my eyes at my brother’s wedding. Even though he’s only younger than me by one year, it was a little disheartening that he found so much before I did. I was tempted to drink myself silly at the reception, and when I caught my reflection in the champagne glass, I ended up making a list of things I could do because I was single. It made everything so much better.
But I understand longing for something you so desperately want, and someone else has.
I cuddle Chase up on my shoulder and sidestep my way to Cooper. My hand isn’t free to hold, but hopefully the comfort of my arm against his is enough.
Jim sets Claire on her feet, and she’s already off to destroy more things in the massive home. I’m grateful Cooper thought to close the downstairs, indoor pool off before they arrived.
They head out, both dragging their feet with—what I have to assume—exhaustion and not hesitation at leaving their children with me. Jim’s grabby hands don’t make it halfway down the drive before they’re on Katie’s ass. I hold back a laugh and bump the door closed with my hip. I really hope they get some sleep today and not just the non-sleeping kind.
When I turn around, Cooper’s arms are extended to me, his lips turned up in a wide grin. “I want the baby.”
I pull Chase closer to me. “Mine.”
He narrows his eyes. “Thought you didn’t like kids.”
“And that is why I get this one, you get that one.” I gesture to the two-year-old who has magically appeared wearing nothing but her diaper and princess sandals. Cooper tilts his head, an annoyed expression in his eyes that is so adorable it makes me chuckle at my evil behavior. But he accepts his challenge, turning toward the little hellion.
“You want to see a whole room of toys, Claire?”
My niece’s eyes turn into perfect circles, and she nods up-and-down up-and-down at Cooper.
That sexy smile is back. “Come on, I’ll show ya.”
He takes off at a jogging pace to the basement, ignoring the sitting room full of toys and opts for the giant playroom downstairs. Claire follows close behind while I grab the diaper bag and bring up the caboose. I can hear her ear-splitting squeals all the way down the stairs, and I shake my head in absolute awe that Chase snoozes right through it. This kid is going to have a hard time waking up to an alarm clock in his future.
When I step inside the entertainment room, Cooper is showing things off like Claire is on a game show and these are all her prizes, while Claire runs from play kitchen to dollhouse to six-foot stuffed dragons, screaming at the top of her little lungs. That girl… I can never tell if she’s throwing a fit or crazy happy—that noise is the only one she’s capable of.
She settles inside the play castle, knocking down all the things from their designated spot. Cooper watches like he doesn’t care that she’s basically playing Godzilla.
“She okay to do that?” I wave my hand over at Claire chucking a plastic cup across the room.
“She’s a kid.” Cooper leans against the wall and rolls his head toward me. “Of course she is.”
I hold back a laugh, and then take a spot in the comfy looking rocker in the corner. Well, so far she’s being okay—for Claire—but I guarantee a tantrum is coming soon. He’ll see… kids are not like the photos in picture frames for sale.
***
My head throbs, right between my eyebrows, as yet another blood-curdling shrill comes out of such a little mouth.
“Take him,” I plead, holding out the bomb I just detonated. “Please, dear god, make it stop.”
Cooper laughs from his spot on the floor, a red line staining his cheek—a battle scar from when he attempted to stop Claire from coloring all over the window with a red Sharpie she got from the office she wasn’t supposed to be in.
“You sure you want to trade?” he asks, eyebrow tilted in a very annoying look-who-has-the-bad-kid-now fashion.
“Just take him.” My nephew is now taking harsh breaths between his wails, making it sound as if he’s a skipping track on a record used as a method of birth control. Cooper carefully takes him from my arms, smile set on his lips as he cuddles with the screaming bundle. He gazes down at the babe, rocking him in his very muscular arms that I know from experience are a lot more comfortable than they look. Chase doesn’t settle down in the slightest—in fact, I think he’s gotten louder—but Cooper doesn’t bat an eye.
“Let’s go outside, yeah buddy?” he says, his voice gruffer than the baby-talk I’m used to hearing around the little guy, yet still so very endearing. I can appreciate that even through this pounding headache.
He takes him out back, bouncing him up and down and patting his little baby bottom. I run a finger across my forehead, praying that the pain subsides once the noise is gone.
“Aya, Aya,” Claire says, pulling on my pant leg, proudly holding up her diaper. “I pee pee.”
I hang my head and let out a long sigh. Of course, that I understand.
***
My eyes drift up to the massive, decorative clock hanging on the wall in the living room, half the toys from the kid’s room burying me from the waist down as I sip on fake tea—that I’m pretending is wine—with my niece. It’s only been an hour since I passed off the crying baby, and only three since Jim and Katie left to have a day of… not this. How in the world do they do it every day?
“Moobak tafolrof sitvia,” Claire babbles, smacking the teapot against the eyeball of a stuffed horse.
“Uh huh.” My go-to response for this “tea party.” I don’t want to poke the bear; the one time I said, “What, sweetie?” she threw herself flat on her back and screamed at the ceiling.
She yawns, her small mouth opening wide as she relaxes into the horde of stuffed animals. I slowly, cautiously, pluck myself free from all the dress up clothes, play sets, and baby dolls, hoping another screaming session isn’t pending when I get to my feet.
Claire hardly seems to notice my movement, her eyelids drooping. The teapot slips from her fingers as she drifts off.
I have maybe twenty minutes if I’m lucky. With the house suddenly so quiet, I tiptoe over all the toys and head out back to Cooper, holding my breath and hoping Chase too has drifted off to sleep.
Cooper turns his head at the sound of the sliding glass door. He gives me a half-smile, one that is a little lackluster from his usual grin.
“Hey,” I mouth.
“Hey,” he whispers back. Chase sniffles in his sleep against Cooper’s shoulder. “It’s awfully quiet in there.”
“Out here, too.” I take a seat next to him in the twin chaise lounge. “You want to make a break for it?”
He chuckles. “Hell no. T
his is the part that makes it all worth it.”
My brow raises, like, uh-huh, sure. He only grins at my skepticism.
“I love it,” he says, adjusting in the chair, careful not to disturb the baby against his shoulder. “The noise, the chaos, then the quiet moments that make you wonder what you did to deserve such little blessings.”
“I don’t think you’re using that word right.”
“I’d have fifty of them, if I could.”
I fight away a yawn. “How many do you really want?”
He presses his lips together in thought, his hand patting the tiny bundle in his arms. I have to say, while I scoff at the fake family of the Hallmark card, I feel as if I could snap a picture right now, send it into their headquarters, and make millions.
“Four,” he says after a minute. “Maybe six.”
“Six?”
“Gotta be an even number.” He adjusts again, and I wonder if his rear is past the point of numb.
“Why not two?” I point out while secretly wondering if zero is an even number.
He shakes his head. “I want more than two.”
I rest my chin in my hand, completely puzzled by this man. You’d think after today two would be too many.
“So why an even number?”
“Buddy system,” he says without hesitation. “Disneyland, Universal Studios, water parks, flights… everyone’s gotta have a partner.” He leans in with a wink. “No child left behind.”
I suck in a breath, warming from head to toe from his proximity. His skin is sun-kissed and gorgeous, and I let out a frustrated sigh at his beauty. It’s not fair; why can’t a man this breathtaking be interested in a fling?
“Even spouting crazy talk, you are very sexy, Mr. Sterling.”
He laughs. “Likewise, Ms. Baker.”
I have the urge to plant a kiss on his lips, but I’m interrupted halfway on my quest to close the distance by a crash coming from inside, followed by an “Uhhhhh ohhhhhh.”
Cooper lets out a laugh at my pouty frown, and before I can even move, he offers me the sleeping child instead. And I gladly accept.
***
Cooper and I wave at a rejuvenated Jim and Katie as they take their children far far away from here. The second Cooper closes the door, we both fall back against it and slide to the floor. If I agree to babysit for ten hours again, someone please check me for early signs of senility.
I roll my head toward Cooper at the same time he rolls his to me, and I let out a laugh and run a finger over that red mark still on his cheek. His smile forms, denting a dimple under my nail.
“That was fun,” he says, and he actually means it.
“Strange, strange man,” I muse, shaking my head against the door. The house is a disaster. Toys strewn every which way, uncapped markers on a high shelf in an attempt to keep them from a two-year-old magician… who managed to undress herself five times throughout the day and made sharp and dangerous objects appear in her little hands. There’s a strong smell of spit-up hanging in the air, mixed with yet another burnt meal… my fault this time. After starting a pot of noodles, a poopy scent reached my nostrils and even the most advanced of diaper changers would have spent twenty minutes on that mess.
The moment Katie and Jim rang the doorbell, relief covered every inch of me. I gratefully handed over the half-naked children and rushed them out the door. Though, it was nice to get a squishy hug from Claire before she left. I wasn’t too fond of the very wet and chocolately kiss she left on my jeans. On closer inspection, I doubt even the toughest detergent is gonna get that out.
Cooper leans over, and before I realize what he’s doing, his lips are on mine in a gentle, soft kiss.
“Thank you.”
“Huh?” I say, swaying a little from the unexpected display of affection.
“For giving me a day with kids.” He blinks a set of tired eyes, a light smile on his lips. “There aren’t that many in my life.”
I chuckle through a yawn. “No wonder you like them. I’m surrounded by the little runts.”
He only gives me a tired, curious glance. I let out a breath and feel myself slipping into a sleepy babble.
“Well, my brother has those two,” I say, lazily tapping against the door. “My sister and her husband have four. My partner at work has three. And my best friend has one on the way.”
“Wow,” he says, and I’m grateful he appreciates that it really is a lot of children. “What’s the age range?”
“The oldest is Lucas… he’s ten. And Chase is the youngest at 2 months, unless you count Holland’s bun.”
“Holland’s your best friend?”
I nod, covering yet another yawn. My limbs are starting to turn to jelly. “She’s coming up on her tenth anniversary. She and her husband always wanted to wait to have kids, so they’re just starting now.”
He lets out a low hum, letting me know he’s still listening, but I think we’re both starting to drift. Going from one extreme to another is tiring, and it’s catching up to me.
“When did you decide you didn’t want them?”
I have to lift my eyelids, not realizing that I’d closed them. “Not everyone wants kids, Cooper.”
“I know,” he says. “I don’t mean to offend. It’s only… you mentioned that when things didn’t happen for you, you’d convinced yourself you never wanted them. I’m curious about when that was.”
My mind is way too done to think about the answer. And even if I was one hundred percent alert, I’m not sure if there is one. “I don’t know,” I say. “My brother’s wedding, maybe.” I pause, second guessing myself. “Maybe before that.”
His lazy smile twitches, eyes scanning over my face and then down my arm before he tangles his fingers with mine.
“May I sleep with you?”
I frown. “As delicious as that sounds, I really don’t think I have the energy to—”
“I mean actual sleep.” He taps his forehead to mine. “I can see you’re dozing off, and I am too. But I’m not quite ready to say goodnight.”
My lips turn up, and I nod as enthusiastically as I can muster. Though I don’t think I’ve made a case for my life logic at all today, and I really should, I’m not ready to admit that actually sleeping together sounds so much better right now than “sleeping” together.
16
We All Fall
Given the fact that I went to bed utterly exhausted, I’m not surprised that I wake up to a glorious Sunday morning… that is technically almost afternoon.
Shifting in the soft and fluffy sheets, I breathe in a satisfied breath of fresh air, the balcony doors left open once again so my cats can find their way to their litter box in the middle of the night. My body feels as if I’ve slept on a bed of clouds, a little sore from the constant up and down from the floor to chasing a toddler, but for the most part, very much content.
Cooper and I spent most of last night lazily conversing until we fell asleep. I don’t even remember if I finished the sentence I was saying, but he obviously didn’t notice or didn’t care because I didn’t wake up once after I drifted off.
It was nice, though. I try to think back to a moment when I fell asleep next to someone I hadn’t already stripped naked with. There were a few, but they didn’t last long. After the initial infatuation, there was nothing left but sex. When that too lost its appeal, they moved on or I did. I don’t remember a time when cuddling was something to look forward to or even enjoy. It felt too serious. Yet, last night was… not perfect, but whatever word comes closest to it.
I roll my head to look at my bedmate who is still sound asleep. He is a radiator; the heat pouring off of him hot enough to melt a candle in under a minute. I don’t mind it at the moment. Even with the summer air floating inside the cool house, I snuggle up to him, tucking my head in the warmth of his chest.
That heat rushes straight between my legs, the simple act of pressing against him giving me a not so subtle reminder that it’s been a while since I’ve be
en in bed with a man. And a loooong while since I’ve been in bed with a man I was so attracted to that I’d fake a marriage with him just to spend some more time together.
I squeeze his middle, and he stirs in my arms. A sleepy smile spreads across his lips, and he plops a heavy arm on my waist. A low grumble vibrates through my cheek as he groans into my hair, and another wave of fire fills my lower abdomen when he thrusts his hips against me.
Ah… one of the perks of waking up next to a man. Spooning is a very different—and usually unwanted—surprise, but waking up forking? Well, let’s just say I prefer cake to ice cream.
I really appreciate what sleep does to a man, and with my body on the search for relieving the tension that’s been building at a much faster rate since I met him, I press down on him and rock my hips playfully, holding back a moan from the surge of pleasure that sparks across every inch of my skin.
His grin widens. “Please tell me I’m awake.”
I tilt my lips up toward his, seeking them out with soft, yet urgent kisses. As soon as I get a hold of his mouth, his hand cups my cheek, holding me in place as his tongue slides across mine in one smooth, sensual movement.
I’m losing my head already. While every kiss he’s delivered has been an electric shock straight to my core, this one is almost orgasm-worthy. I rock my hips even harder into him, hoping to get some much-needed relief.
He chuckles into my mouth, leaning up on an arm to hover over me. His hand goes back to my face, holding me as if I’m something to be savored. It’s a unique feeling to be on the receiving end of something that seems so loving and caring. In all my naughty escapades, I’ve never come across a man who treats a woman he’s only known for a short while as a longtime lover. In the back of my mind, I wonder if he’s only kissing and touching me in this way because this is how he believes married couples express intimacy, or if it is truly how he is in bed.
I wriggle underneath him, ready to speed things up before my mind becomes too laden with thoughts that will take me out of the moment. My fingers start to tug and pull at his hair, his clothing, my hips rocking upward now in an attempt to get him to go faster. Cooper chuckles at my enthusiasm, taking my anxious hands and moving them up over my head.
