by Ravenna Tate
So why haven’t you told her you’re in love with her?
Good question. He knew the answer, intellectually, at any rate. When she didn’t realize he was watching, he saw the fear and doubt creep into her eyes. As far as he knew, her panic attacks had stopped, but she still was afraid to give her heart away. Not that he blamed her.
Oliver would give anything to find the magic words, or gesture, or something to break through that last barrier. Did it exist, or was he fooling himself that this extraordinary woman would one day be his? Totally and completely his?
Every time he entertained that question, he thought about all the wasted years of his life he’d spent fucking around, literally and figuratively. He’d taken his looks and his charm for granted. Getting dates had always been so easy, and he’d been so damn smug that now it made him sick to think about it.
He’d taken women for granted, and he’d tossed away relationships like they were old socks with holes in them, not worth trying to mend. It was sickening. The fact that he was no longer like that or had any desire to be was small compensation.
Karma had risen up to bite him the ass in a big way. Because although he had indeed changed, just as he’d promised Blair he was ready to do, the one woman he had to possess might never be ready to give herself to any man in that way. She had demons he didn’t know how to conquer, and he didn’t understand how to help her face them.
But Oliver knew that unless they both found a way to help Blair face her past and beat it down for good, their relationship would always have this pall hanging over it, and he might lose her one day. He couldn’t bear that. He knew it as certain as he knew how much time they all had left underground before they suffocated.
****
Blair had been dating Oliver for one month, and he told her he wanted to take her out that night to Dirty Harry’s, to celebrate their anniversary. Since no one had ever wanted to mark the occasion of her first date with them, she was delighted.
The entire month had been like that. He was charming, and attentive, and did little things every single day that made her feel special and wanted. It was the only relationship she’d ever had where she was so happy all the time, including her short-lived marriage. Blair was both overwhelmed by it and still fearful of it. She’d do anything to push away the fear, and was convinced that in time that would happen.
That Friday night, they sat in the same back booth at Dirty Harry’s, and Blair ordered the same burger and stuffed onion rings, but this time Oliver opted for a chicken sandwich and a small salad. A few bites into the sandwich, he told her he wished he’d chanced the burger from hell again.
“It’s not good? I always heard their chicken was okay.”
“You always heard it was okay? You mean you’ve never had it?”
She gave him a sheepish grin. “Well, no. I don’t know anyone who actually raved about it. When I say ‘okay’ I mean it’s edible, but not great.”
“Oh. Now you tell me.”
She tried not to laugh, and instead changed the subject. “How is the search for an electrical expert and a physics genius going? You haven’t talked about it for a few days.”
His face brightened, and he put the sandwich down. “I’m glad you asked. I meant to give you an update but didn’t want to spoil our date with shop talk.”
“No, tell me. Please.”
“Atticus knows a physicist whom he feels will keep this under his hat. He’s a friend of his who went through undergrad with him, and is the CEO of California Systems. His name is Corbin Bertrand.”
Blair knew that company name. California Systems maintained the hothouses where all the food was grown for the cities underneath the USA. “I assume his specialty in college had nothing to do with growing food?”
Oliver chuckled. “No, not even close. There isn’t much use now for what he did before we all moved underground. He worked on designing more efficient communications towers for satellite transmissions.”
She nodded. “No, we sure don’t need those now. How about an electrical expert?”
“Viggo knows a man named Harold Gregory who is VP of research at a company called Air Dynamics. They built and maintain the airlocks. His expertise on the surface was in studying the magnetic fields.”
“I’m surprised neither of those men worked for NSSL.”
“We wanted to avoid anyone who worked for them, only because we still don’t know the real names of all those thirteen who were part of the snippet of conversation we intercepted.”
“Ah, that makes sense. And how exciting you found them finally.”
“Yes. We’re all getting impatient now. We have a lot more information we had a year ago, but now we want this to be over.”
She reached across the table and took his hands. “We all want that.”
“I know.”
He stared into her eyes with so much intensity, she wondered if she should ask him whether something had happened that he was afraid to talk about. But then he smiled and let go of her hands, picking up his sandwich again. “I might as well finish this.”
“Do you want the rest of my burger and onion rings instead?”
“No, but thank you for offering. If I’m going to be up all night, I don’t want it to be from heartburn.”
A shiver ran down at her spine at the tone of his words. “What do you want it to be from?”
He gave her a molten grin. “One guess, beautiful.”
Blair knew she’d never feel this way about another man again. It wasn’t possible. Oliver was the one she’d dreamed of finding, ever since she was a young teen. He was real, and he was hers. And she was never giving him up. Never.
Chapter Fifteen
Monday morning, Blair and Oliver both arrived at the office only minutes before the project leader meeting was scheduled. “I should cancel it.”
“You can’t. You’ve never done that. Everyone will be in your office or calling you to find out what’s wrong.”
He ran his hands through his hair, then his gaze traveled over her, slowly. “You look like you just crawled out of bed, and I feel like I did.”
“We did just crawl out of bed,”
He started laughing, and then she did, too. Memories of their weekend together washed over her, bringing with them fresh desire for Oliver. They’d both been insatiable, and Blair was sore in places this morning she hadn’t known could get sore. But she didn’t care. She still wanted him, now.
“Fuck it. Let’s go.” He took her hand and led her down the hall to the meeting room. Blair ignored the knowing, amused looks they both got as they entered the room, and instead tried to concentrate on the meeting. Her team members and the other project leaders had stopped asking what was going on between the two of them. They’d guessed the truth a while ago, so their disheveled, hurried appearance this morning shouldn’t be a shock to any of them.
After the meeting, Blair kept busy all morning with preliminary research on her plan that she’d promised Oliver she would do. He’d told her that the experts they’d found would do their own research before putting together recommendations, but she wanted to do this so she wouldn’t sound like an idiot when they set up a meeting.
She’d already been assured she’d be part of this project in some way, even if that turned out to be in a consulting capacity only. But she still wanted to sound like she knew what she was talking about in front of people with far more expertise in this field than she had.
Oliver emailed her at noon and asked if she wanted to have lunch in his office. Since he usually came to her office to eat, she wondered what was on his devious mind, but didn’t hesitate to tell him she’d be right there. She hadn’t stopped thinking about being naked with him again all morning.
He had ordered food, and they ate, talking about the research she was doing. When they finished, he cleared the containers and then locked his door. Turning to face her, she put a hand to her mouth at the look on his face. Filled with lust, his beautiful eyes sparkled.
/> “My schedule is cleared for the next ninety-two minutes.”
“I suppose my research can wait that long.”
He sauntered toward her, like a large cat stalking prey. “I’d say it can, and since I sign your paycheck, I’m probably right about that.”
“I haven’t stopped thinking about this weekend all morning.”
“Neither have I.”
He was inches from her. She could smell the desire on him, and no doubt he could sense the same in her. Blair cut her gaze toward his office door. They’d never risked it before, but that’s what made it so appealing now.
“No one will bother us for at least ninety-one minutes.”
She smiled. “Are you counting them down?”
“Yes, so let’s get going before we lose this time to ourselves.”
She unbuttoned her shirt, and he watched, practically drooling. His jaw was slack, and that always made her feel so desirable. She tossed the shirt onto his desk and then unhooked her bra. She took it off and threw it over her shoulder. Whether it landed on the desk or not, she didn’t know, and she didn’t care.
Then she pulled down her jeans, taking the panties with them. She removed her shoes and socks, and stood in front of him, stark naked. The fact that he was still dressed was so fucking sexy she nearly came without doing a damn thing.
He started to take off his shirt but she stopped him, placing a hand on his arm. “Hang on. There’s something I want to do to you in here, but first I have a question.”’
“What is it?”
Would he be upset she’d asked? “How many women have had sex in here with you?”
“None.” His response was immediate, and she saw the truth in his eyes. “I never chanced it.”
“Good.” Blair sat on the desk, then pulled him closer and undid the button on his jeans. “I was hoping I’d be the first. “She pulled the shirt out of his waistband, then unzipped his jeans and took out his cock.
“Oh, fuck me—”
“Yeah, I will. In a minute. But right now, I’m still hungry.” She leaned over and took as much of his dick into her mouth as she could. She knew from past experience he’d come quickly inside her mouth, but she wasn’t worried about that. She knew how to make him hard again, and they still had plenty of time.
“Blair…” He grasped her head with both hands and pushed more of his shaft inside. She sucked hard, moving her lips over the length of his cock, and it only took minutes for him to cry out loudly and shudder.
Her mouth was filled with hot cum and she swallowed all of it, then kissed up and down his dick and licked his balls. His soft groans told her he wouldn’t have any trouble getting hard again in a short while, and that was good. She wanted him inside her.
He grabbed her face, kissing her rough and hard. She moaned into his open mouth, and then when he released her, he pointed toward the desk. “Turn around and bend over. You’re a bad girl, and you need to be punished.”
Blair let out a shaky sigh as her pussy contracted in tiny spasms. She did as he asked, resting her arms and torso on the wood, then glanced over her shoulder to see what he was doing. He crossed the room, his cock still hanging out of his pants, which she found incredibly enticing, and opened a locked cabinet.
She’d always assumed it contained work-related things, but boy was she wrong. Blair gasped as he pulled out a long, wooden paddle, a pair of leather cuffs, a spreader bar, and a bottle of lube. What the fuck?
Blair straightened up and turned around. “You told me you never had sex in here.”
“I didn’t. Doesn’t mean I haven’t wanted to, though.”
“Why don’t you have these things at your apartment?”
He sighed. “Because I haven’t met too many women who were into kinky things, and I never wanted to scare them. And with you, I’ve been easing into this because of what you went through. I would rather die than frighten you off.”
The words were right there, ready to spill out. This would be the perfect time to tell him she loved him. Instead, she addressed what he’d just said. Chicken!
“Oh, Oliver. I’m not afraid of you. I swear I’m not. I would love to try more kinky things with you.”
The relief on his face nearly tore her heart in two. They stared at each other for long moments, and then he glanced toward the door. “You’d better turn around, bad girl, and bend over again, or there won’t be adequate time to punish you.”
“Yes, Sir.” She smiled as he groaned, then turned to face the desk once more and bent over. He moved behind her, caressing her naked ass. She moaned, pushing up against him.
Why didn’t you say it?
He slipped a finger into her pussy from behind, and all she could concentrate on was the exquisite sensation as she contracted the walls around his digit. “Oh, please!”
“In time.” He moved his finger in and out. She was so close! But before she could make herself come he removed his finger and she heard him step back.
“First things first. Put your hands behind your back.”
Blair hesitated for a second, then did as he asked.
“Hang on.” He walked over to the armchair and pulled the cushion off it, then placed it underneath her torso. “Lean on this. Better?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
He fit the cuffs around her wrists and clipped them together. Then he kissed her lower back, just above the spot where her ass cheeks met. “Do you know what a safeword is?”
“Yes.”
“Yours is ‘red’. Use it for anything that overwhelms you, if you become afraid, or even if you need a break. We will immediately stop and take care of your needs. Do you understand?”
“Yes.” Blair closed her eyes and gave her emotions free rein. How could any woman help but fall in love with him? This was still the perfect time to tell him, but she didn’t want to stop him now because the idea of being naked, helpless, and paddled in his office, before he fucked her, excited her like nothing had before.
He slipped the spreader bar around her ankles, after adjusting the width of her stance, and then he stood behind her. “Blair, I wish you could see how incredibly sexy you look right now.”
“I’m glad you’re enjoying the view.”
“Oh, I am.” He rubbed the paddle against her ass cheeks, then turned it sideways and slid the edge over her wet pussy. She gasped at the way it ramped up her excitement level. Who would have known?
“How do you imagine this will feel on your bare skin?”
“I don’t know.” She could hardly speak.
“Try. Tell me what you’re imagining.”
“Um, it will hurt.”
“Oh yes. Yes, it will. But you’re a very bad girl, Blair. You deserve this.”
“I know I am.” She was so wet now he might have to clean the carpet in front of his desk. Any second now she expected to feel her pussy juices run down her legs.
“I’m glad you admit it.”
She gasped again as his dick, hard once more, teased the crack between her ass cheeks. “Look what you’ve done to me.”
She giggled. “I can’t help that.”
“Yes, you can.”
She heard him step back, then braced herself for a swat, but when the paddle came down across both cheeks, he’d barely struck her. She let out a loud breath.
“Not hard enough?”
That voice! It was filled with humor, and she shivered. Why hadn’t he shown this side of him before? She loved this, and wished they were back at his apartment so they didn’t have to worry about time. But it was more exciting this way because there was a chance they’d be caught.
“I don’t think it’s my decision to make, is it?”
“You’re right.” He licked her lower back. “It’s not. It’s mine.”
The next blow hurt like fucking crazy, and she yelled.
“Was that a safeword?”
“No.”
“Good.”
She gritted her teeth through three more swats, an
d he wasn’t holding back. Tears stung her eyes, but at the same time, she’d never been this turned-on. She didn’t want him to stop. She wanted to know how much she could take.
He brushed his hands over the wounds he’d just made. “You are so fucking sexy. Please tell me you like this.”
“I love it.” I love you.
“Oh, thank God.”
He slid two fingers into her pussy, and she could barely stay standing as he moved them in and out, slowly. “You’re close, aren’t you, love?”
“Yes,” she whispered. Did he just call me ‘love’?
“But I don’t think I should let you just yet.” He withdrew his fingers and she cried out as three more blows landed on her ass, harder than the earlier ones. How strong was he?
When he moved closer and pushed his dick into her pussy, her climax exploded. She cried out again, barely cognizant of the fact that anyone outside his office would hear her. She didn’t give a shit. This was fucking exquisite, and she didn’t want it to end.
The contractions hadn’t subsided when he pulled out.
“No,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. She started to say something else, but he paddled her again, this time with five swats in a row that burned like a motherfucker.
Then he was inside her once more, and the paddle clattered on the desk next to her arms. “Oh, Blair. Jesus. I have to fuck you now.”
She wasn’t going to argue with that. She couldn’t move because of the restraints. All she could do was plant her feet as he slammed into her, rough and deep. The orgasm that had started earlier crested once more, and she had no clue what was happening as it washed over her, intense and prolonged. The only things she seemed able to focus on were his dick inside her, and the leather cushion underneath her breasts.
He slid a hand under her, rubbing her clit until the climax was almost painful, but still he fucked her. It was the most decadent, erotic thing they’d ever done, and Blair didn’t want it to stop. When she came a second time, he came as well, and their cries filled the office.
The cuffs were off, as was the spreader bar, and she was on his lap before she knew he’d removed the restraints and moved them to the sofa. He cradled her in his strong arms, and she leaned against his warmth, her eyes closed. This was what she wanted, every day of her life, from this moment on. Nothing less would do.
