Chapter 31
Chloe and I kicked off our boots and peeled off our socks in unison as we sat on the bedroom floor across from each other. She’d thrown her clothes in a messy pile at the end of her bed, slipped on her pajamas, and stumbled to the bathroom to brush her teeth before climbing into bed. She sat with her back to me. “Will you brush my hair before you turn off the light?”
“You want a ponytail for bed?”
“No, a braid please.” Chloe yawned.
I sectioned off her hair into three even strands then wove her hair into a lose braid. “Does that feel okay?”
She patted the back of her head inspecting my work. “Perfect.” She burrowed beneath the covers and tucked the sheet under her chin.
“Night, kiddo,” I said, touching her nose. Chloe stared at me with solemn intent. I brushed her cheek with the back of my hand. “Don’t worry.”
“That’s what grown-ups say when something bad is about to happen and they think you don’t know.” Chloe rubbed her eyes.
“Okay, how about this?” I took a deep breath. “Don’t look so sad, little girl. I will see you again. Distance won’t be between us forever.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better,” Chloe said, her knuckles taut from gripping the seam of the sheet she scrunched up with her thumbs.
“Okay, how about this. It sucks that I have to go home.” The corner of my mouth tugged toward the ceiling fan that blew cool waves of air against my neck. A thread of happiness pulled at the corner of Chloe’s mouth.
“Better. I know I’ll get to see you next week, but then what? When can you come back?” Her eyes filled with angst. “Mom always says she’ll come back and she doesn’t.”
Chloe’s words were a dagger in my heart. I reached out and rubbed her hands with mine, trying to free her grip from the bedding. “I know. That sucks, too, but try to remember the times that made you smile when you could see her. Like the time she gave you this necklace.” Chloe’s eyes searched mine, her expression flat. “You know there are times that Glad makes me sad, too.”
“Really?”
I remembered Chloe muttering in her sleep when I first got here. Her words implied that I could be her mom. My heart knew I couldn’t take Brook’s place, but my head nagged me that maybe I could fill in the cracks of time in between the sparse visits. “Yeah, moms aren’t perfect. Just ask Bradley.”
Chloe grinned.
“Sorry, little girl, life isn’t always the bees knees like it has been these past few days that we’ve together with Harry, Walter, and Judy.”
“Sounds like something Glad would say.” Chloe reached for Voodoo at the end of the bed. She sat up and cuddled with her purple scrappy stuffed toy with one eye as she studied my face.
“It is. I’m just repeating it because it reminds me of her.”
“You remind me of her,” Chloe said, stroking Voodoo’s head. “You’re a lot alike.”
I never thought Mom and I were a lot alike. I raised my eyebrow at Chloe and touched Voodoo’s black winking eye, the one Mom had sewn on last summer.
“She’s funny like you. She loves me and I think you do too.” Chloe’s words tapered off into the night as the crickets sang outside her bedroom window.
My breath caught in my chest. “I do,” I whispered. “That’s what makes this suck even more.” I put my pointer finger in the dimple below her right cheek just before she fell into my arms like a child who hasn’t seen her momma all day long. Chloe muttered something into my chest. I lifted her chin so I could see her eyes. “What?”
She pressed her lips together.
“What?” I said, lowering my voice. My shoulders fell forward as a shadow passed over her green eyes rimmed with sleep.
“Don’t not like my dad because of me,” she said then buried her head in my chest.
“What?” I said, lifting her chin. I remember my conversation with Harry at the bottom of the stairs and wondered if this was his doing. “What did Harry say to you?”
“Nothing. This is me,” she said softly, playing with the hem on my T-shirt.
“You know that would never be the case.” Damn it. This was exactly what I was trying to avoid. Worry washed over Chloe’s expression. Thinking about John and how drawn I was to him, I tucked stray strands of blonde hair behind Chloe’s ears. “I’m not leaving you. I told you before, we’ll always have each other no matter where we live.”
Chloe tilted Voodoo’s face toward hers as she listened.
“Believe me,” I said.
Chloe lifted her eyes.
“Trust me.” I held out my pinky and hoped like hell I could trust myself to keep my promise. She was the last person who deserved a broken heart. Chloe contemplated the gesture then hooked her pinky finger with mine. Tears stuck at the back of my throat like a wet lint ball. “I need you, too,” I said solemnly, hoping, yet knowing she could sense my the apprehension I carried day-in and day-out.
“Okay.”
She caressed my cheek with her soft touch. I kissed her forehead.
You look like Glad, too.”
Mom’s face flashed in my mind. She’d stuck with me through Bradley’s childhood, Dad’s death, Beckett’s astounding secret that provoked divorce, my battle with cancer, and normal everyday crap. “She’ll be glad to see you next week.”
“I know, but I don’t want to say goodbye.” Chloe played with the end of her braid. A tear dripped down her cheek. She wiped it away with the back of her hand.
“She loves you very much, maybe even more than me,” I said.
“This really does suck.”
“It won’t suck forever.”
“Yeah, but it still sucks.”
I raised an eyebrow at her. “Are we square?” She scrunched up her nose at me. “Are we all set? Do you think you can go to sleep now?”
Chloe let out a sigh and covered her mouth as she yawned. “I guess so. Are we having special breakfast in the morning?”
“I think so. French Toast and bacon.”
“Yum.” She lowered her head, her downy pillow cradling her sweet head.
“That’s not going to suck,” I said, pulling the comforter up to her chin as she closed her eyes. “Is it okay if I turn off the light?”
Chloe opened her eyelids a smidgeon. “Yes.”
She reached out to me and I hugged her. Turning off the lamp, I said a prayer. Light from the hallway crept between the bottom of the door and the floor showing me the way. I picked up Chloe’s clothes and thought about all the times I picked up after Bradley and the students in my classroom. I peeked over my shoulder as she whispered my name.
“I trust you,” she said into the darkness.
“I know.” I turned toward the door, threw her clothes down the laundry chute in the bathroom, and padded down the stairs in my bare feet.
Judy was on the sofa with her feet up on the leather ottoman large enough to sleep four. I plopped down beside her, drained from the day of emotion. “What a day.” She handed me a map with a highlighted route.
“Glad you got this covered.” I yawned, thinking about the long haul ahead.
Judy closed her eyes. “John told me to tell you he’s on the porch.”
I handed her the map and scooted closer. “Thanks for being such a great friend and coming all the way out here with me.”
She peeked at me through tiny slits. “Are you kidding? This has been great.”
“I know. I told Chloe we’d have French toast and bacon for breakfast. Gotta feed those boys, too.” I rested my feet up on the ottoman and smoothed my hair back from my face. “God, I remember taking Bradley in the car on long trips and he’d be hungry before we even left the driveway.”
“Gotta love ‘em,” Judy took her feet off the leather footrest. She straightened her pile of maps and travel books. “I can’t wait to see Pink.”
“I’d be glad to take the boys so you two can have date night. They can even stay over if you want. I could even
come to your house. I don’t mind sleeping on the sofa, besides I kind of owe you.”
“You don’t owe me anything and you wouldn’t have to sleep on the sofa. I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.” Judy’s eyebrows lifted. “But, we just might take you up on that.” She took in the grand room. “This sure is a different way of life,” she said, fingering her curls.
“Way different, but I could get used to it pretty easily, I think.” I crossed my arms in front of me. “Imagine, just picking up and moving out here.”
“Wouldn’t that be something?” Judy closed her eyes and yawned. “I better get to bed.”
“Night.” I closed my eyes and rested my head against the leather sofa.
“Don’t let me forget this in the morning. Oh, and John put a present in the back of the Suburban for you.”
“What is it?” I asked, opening one eye.
“Montana’s finest beer.”
“Well that’s not a kick in the pants. Yum!”
“Night, girl.”
“Night, sister.”
Judy touched my arm. “Um, don’t forget, there’s a handsome man on the porch waiting for you.”
“I know. I won’t forget.” How could I forget? God, he showed me his mother’s wedding ring, said he wanted it to be mine. “Night. See you in the morning.” Judy left and I was alone. Thoughts sprouted in-between heavy breaths, dangerous thoughts, tempting thoughts, life-changing thoughts.
I forced myself off the sofa then headed for the porch. John sat in the dark. He eased me down into his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hung my feet over the side of the chair. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”
“I like sitting in the dark.”
I rested my head against his shoulder. He smelled like hay and sweet Montana air. “I like the way you smell.”
“I like the way you feel.” His hand slid up my thigh and around my bottom.
I ran my hand over his rough chin of whiskers. “I’ve never seen you this unshaven.”
“Do you like it?”
His breath warmed my neck and his lips nibbled at my ear. “Yeah,” I said. “I don’t want to go home.”
“Good, this fighting harder stuff is working.”
John tugged the back of my shirt free from my jeans and ran his hand up my spine. My mind flooded with tempting thoughts.
“You know, you really should have your shoes on,” John whispered.
“Why?” I asked, letting out a soft moan.
“If you had your shoes on, I’d take you out to the barn and make love to you.”
My hand crept across his cheekbone and down his jawline, the connection between us strong, harmonious. I wiggled my toes as they cooled in the refreshing night breeze. I swung my feet over off the arm of the chair and stood without breaking the spark between us. Our stares focused on each other, neither one of us willing to abandon the moment. Anticipation trickled through my veins. In the quietest of voices, I spoke. “Let me get my shoes.”
“Just seeing if you were willing,” John said through narrow lips. He held me close, his hand on the small of my back.
I stood on his boots as he lifted my chin. “I think we’ve already established that, cowboy.” The moon pulled at the corner of my subtle grin as I reminisced about our ride to the top of the mountain. My stomach twitched with excitement and my heart yearned for his touch, just once more before our morning goodbye.
“Now we’re getting somewhere, darlin’.”
John swept me off my feet, then cradled me in his arms like a sack of sugar, only I had arms and I wasn’t risking letting them slip from his strong shoulders. “Are we really heading to the barn?” The butterflies knocked against my ribcage like thumping drums at his attentive midnight gaze.
“Heard you slept with a pediatrician back home. Thought you might like a cowboy better.”
His deep tone spurred my heart. “There’s only one way to find out.” My words grazing his cheek along with my lips.
John’s green eyes twinkled in the moonlight as he carried me down the steps. We stopped just outside the barn that was illuminated with ivory haze. John’s mouth covered mine. I grasped the back of his neck and drew him closer, drove him deeper into the kiss. He let out a groan as he reached around with one hand to slide the barn door open. He kissed my forehead before letting my feet touch the ground.
“Wait here.” He stepped softly on the wooden floor, and then stopped at the desk in the corner and clicked on a lantern. He grabbed a stack of blankets from the bench then walked to the far stall filled with hay.
I watched intently as he came back with the glowing lamp in hand. The aroma of wood ignited my senses. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he swept me up into his arms again. His breath tickled my neck as he kissed me lightly, and then he slowly let his mouth wander until his lips met mine. Three little words paraded through my head. John eased me down on a bale of hay, unbuttoned his shirt, and then stepped closer. I rested my head against his stomach while my fingers undid his button-fly jeans. I stood up as the last button popped out of its buttonhole. John’s fingers strummed my cheek like a feather.
I scooted closer, running my fingers down his chest, and let my hands rest on his waist. This was the perfect way to say goodbye.
Chapter 32
Gentle fingers touched my forehead as I started to wake. It took great effort to open just an eye. “What is it, Chloe?” I asked.
“They’re running the horses this morning. You didn’t get to see it, and I don’t want you to leave without seeing it.”
I propped myself up on my elbows then gazed out the window into the hazy early morning sky.
“Come on. You don’t even have to get dressed. We’ll just throw on a sweatshirt and our boots and go out. You have to see it, Maggie.”
My chest heaved as I took a deep breath. “Does it really mean that much to you?”
“Yes, the horses are so beautiful when they run together. It reminds me of when they open the school doors and we all run out trying to get free from the teachers, only the horses are prettier. And it’s loud like thunder,” Chloe said. “Come on or we’ll miss it.”
I threw back the comforter and the sheet, and then swung my legs over the side of the bed. “Okay, let’s go.” My socks and boots were in a pile right where I’d left them last night. Chloe sat on the floor and pushed her bare feet into her cowboy boots. She popped up like a Jack-in-the-box and wiggled into her fleece. I yanked my hair-tie from my messy ponytail, ran my fingers through my hair, and then redid my ponytail. Chloe stood beside me, inspecting my face as I dodged morning’s call. “Okay, let’s go.”
Chloe took my hand.
We tiptoed down the hallway to the stairs. Walter peeked out of the bathroom. “Where you guys going? It’s still kind of dark out. You running away?”
My insides warmed at his innocence. “No, we’re not running away. We’re going to see the horses run,” I said, trying not to wake everyone.
Judy stuck her head into the hallway. “What are you guys doing?” She yawned.
Chloe tugged at my hand. “Come on, Maggie, you can’t miss this.”
“Can I come?” Walter’s eyes bulged with excitement.
“Judy, do you and Harry want to tag along?” I asked.
She yawned and covered her mouth. “I’d like to see them, but my bed is calling. Harry is sawing logs.”
“I want to go.” Walter pulled at his mom’s hand.
Judy disappeared back into her bedroom then reappeared with a sweatshirt in her hand. “You really don’t mind?”
“No.” Tugging the sweatshirt over Walter’s dark curly mop-top was a challenge. I picked him up and carried him down the stairs. He wasn’t as heavy as he looked. Chloe opened the front door and we followed her out to the road down by the creek. We crept through the morning fog as the sun shone its first light. Walter sat on my hip as he wrapped his arms around my neck and sniffed my hair.
“You sme
ll like hay,” he whispered. “I like that smell. We don’t have that back home.”
Chloe beckoned for us to hurry. “Stand here by the creek. The horses will come from behind those trees, across the field and the road over there.” She pointed to the pasture by the barn where Sunnyside Up and Sun Ray spent much of their time. “Just listen. You’ll hear them.”
Walter pressed his lips together, his forehead creased like a little old man’s. He explored my face with his fingertips and an elfin grin, then shifted his weight on my hip.
Chloe shoved her hands into her fleece, her eyes focused on the horizon. When the corner of her mouth curled up, goose bumps covered my skin. Walter’s eyes popped open at the sound of hooves trampling the ground. The rumbling of running horses grew louder as they galloped free in a traveling herd. I couldn’t take my eyes off them, their muscles flexed and twitched in the early light, their manes bounced and thrashed, cutting the morning dew as their breaths billowed through the chill in the air. Their whinnies muted beneath pounding strides. Breeze and Tullia led the way.
“Look, Maggie. It’s Tullia. You rode her to the top of the mountain.”
“I know. She’s fast,” I said, remembering the sweet girl that she was with her white chest and dark speckled hindquarters. “And Breeze is there, too.”
Chloe grinned and buried her hands further into her pockets. “I think they like each other.”
“Me, too,” I said. “Me, too.”
Walter uncovered his ears as the thunder of horses diminished into the morning glow. “That was cool.”
A shiver crept down my spine at the magnificent sight of horses galloping full speed. Chloe’s bright eyes stared through me with barbs of elation and I knew what she was doing bringing me out here to see the beautiful creatures. John wasn’t the only one fighting harder. Winston rode behind the traveling herd on his black mare with one white sock. Trout, his right-hand man alongside, pressing his spurs into the sides of his cream-colored beauty with a black mane and fire in her eyes. Winston glanced in our direction as he trotted behind Huckleberry, the young horse whose black spots appeared dark purple when the sun washed over on her.
Maggie's Montana (Montana Bound Book 3) Page 20
