by E. C. Land
“What do you mean, Angel Eyes?”
“This, I mean I’m not saying I’ve not been with anyone but relationship wise no,” she mutters shaking her head in denial. “I haven’t been with anyone since everything with . . . with you know.”
“Baby,” I murmur, moving to stand in front of her, placing a hand on both her arms, holding her close to me. “I’m not going to push you into anything you’re not ready for. I know the hell you went through. We’re taking this at your pace and I’m not about to force you into a damn thing. I want you to feel safe in my arms and comfortable to ask me anything.”
Harley casts her eyes away from me and presses the side of her head against me. “I’ve never had that before. Not even in friends. Well, besides Luna and Charlotte and you know what happened with Charlotte. Luna probably hates me for cutting her out the way I have. And as much as it hurts to say that I still don’t know if I can be around her. I . . . I have a hard time being around women. I’m scared something will happen.”
“Harley, I know it’s hard. I get it. I do. But I want you to know the ol’ ladies would rather cut off some bitch’s tits or a man’s balls than to ever see someone they deem family hurt by anyone. I swear it to you. You take the chance and let them in, you’ll realize you don’t have to be scared of being around them.”
“I don’t know,” she says apprehensively. “I feel as if my entire life is spinning out of control right now. And I . . . I promised you I’d tell you and I will. While I was in . . . that horrible place, I spent a lot of time in my head. I formed a box and slid my demons inside it. Without having anything around to cause self-harm I knew I couldn’t do anything to myself, so I was able to push them into the said box and block them out.”
“That’s good, Angel Eyes,” I murmur.
“Yeah, I suppose but being out I–I’m scared they’ll get out of the box . . . and I’m weak.” Fuck, I love that she’s being honest with me but it’s fuckin’ killing me hearing her talk about herself the way she is.
I slide my hands down Harley’s arms and take her hands in mine. Stepping over to my bed I sit on the edge and maneuver her until I have her straddling my legs. I’m not trying to put her in a position she’ll be uncomfortable with but I want her to feel me when I say this.
“Harley, baby, you aren’t weak. Everything you went through was traumatic and I get that. You have to understand something about yourself, something I’ve already come to realize. You take the weight of the world on your shoulders without asking for help. We all should have seen it a long time ago, what you were fighting within. You’re strong, Angel Eyes, you just have to see in you what I see. I don’t see a weakling I see a woman who’s dealt with a lot of shit recently and couldn’t handle it on her own yet refused to bring the troubles upon anyone else. And as I said that stops. You need something, to talk to someone, come to me, or any of the guys. When you feel comfortable, go to one of the women. We’re here for you, especially me.”
Harley keeps her eyes locked with mine the entire time I speak but when I stop she closes her eyes and leans her forehead against mine. “Thank you,” she says quietly letting me know she heard every word I said.
Chapter Ten
Harley
After Neo and my heart to heart, a knock sounds on his door interrupting our conversation from going any further.
“Yeah,” Neo calls out, not moving me from his lap. A lap I was currently straddling. I’d never in my life been in such an intimate position.
Whenever I was with a guy it was slam bam thank you ma’am style. So to me, the two of us sitting like this means a lot to me.
There’s a lot to be said when it comes to Neo and I feel I made the right decision in believing I can trust him.
The door opens a smidge. “Jesus fucker, I don’t need to see Harley straddling you,” Venom snipes, making me giggle.
“Well, you’re the fucker who is interrupting a deep conversation between my woman and myself,” Neo mutters.
“Deep conversation my ass, you could have at least asked me for my blessing in you being with her, dick, I did after all claim her as my little sister you know,” Venom says, stepping all the way into the room, his eyes soft as he glances at me.
“Whatever, Venom, I’d claimed her long before you did as my ol’ lady so you’ll have to get over that little fact. Now, what the hell you doing in here? Everything go okay?” Neo asks.
“Yeah, went good. Prez asked me to come get you. I figured you can see what he wants, and I’ll spend time with Harley Quinn here,” Venom states.
Narrowing my gaze on him, I point my finger in his direction. “Call me that again and I’ll punch you in the balls,” I snap.
Venom’s eyes widen slightly as he grins. “Fuck, babe, you are feisty when you don’t like something. Alright HQ is left for when I feel like pissing you off. Now, come on and come hang out with your big bro for a while. I might even know where Harlow keeps the cookies stashed.”
“Hey, fucker, you been holding out on us?” Neo demands, helping me to my feet.
“Yep. I’m lucky enough to have stumbled upon them when I did. She keeps it stocked. Good thing about pregnant women. They seem to love their chocolate,” Venom chuckles.
“Um, I think that’s all women. But I prefer cookies ‘n cream ice cream. Plus, I have to watch the foods I eat to make sure it’s not cooked in peanut oil or have any type of nuts in it,” I blurt out.
Neo pulls himself up off the bed and wraps an arm around my back. “I’ll remember that bit of info,” he mutters. “Now go enjoy yourself with Venom I’ll find you when I’m done and remember don’t be scared if you need to say something say it.”
“Okay, Neo. I’ll try.” I nod my head.
With a swift kiss to my forehead, Neo hands me over to my now so-called brother and heads out of his room to find Stoney.
“Well, peewee, it looks like it’s just you and me, come on,” Venom says, putting his arm around me as he leads me out of Neo’s room. “You don’t need anything out of his room, do you? None of us leave our doors unlocked is why I’m asking.”
“Nope, my suitcase is still in Neo’s monster truck,” I say, making Venom chuckle.
It’s not a monster truck, you’ve just got short legs and can’t climb in it. Means Neo has an excuse in order to put his hands on you,” Venom explains.
“Whatever, I can’t help I’m barely 5’5 and don’t have legs a mile long,” I grumble in my defense.
Venom is still laughing as we make our way into the main room of the clubhouse. An overwhelming sense of self-preservation takes me over as my demons bang against the walls of their cage. Memories of . . . of that woman try to seep in.
Venom must have felt the change in me as he turns me in his arms and cups both sides of my head. “Don’t go there, Harley. Look at me,” he commands and I do as he says. “Good. Now focus on me. See that you’re not alone. I’m right here. Neo’s not far away. Shadow and the rest of the brothers, we’re all here for you. Take deep breaths and release. We’ll get you through this.” His voice is soothing me all the while beating the demons back.
Tears well in my eyes as he pulls me into his chest. I’m unable to stop myself as they fall from my eyes and soak his t-shirt.
“What’s going on?” I stiffen at the feminine voice behind me.
“Raven, what are you doing here? Thought you were with the rest of the ol’ ladies,” Venom asks.
“I didn’t want to leave Mark and Matthew for the entire day,” she murmurs a sense of sadness filling her voice. “Is everything okay? Do you need anything?”
Tilting my head to the side I glance in Raven’s direction seeing the concern in her gaze.
“Oh Harley. I didn’t even realize it was you. I mean, wait, are you two . . .” My eyes widen and I shake my head in denial unable to speak. My throat tight with nerves at being around her. I know in my heart I can trust this woman, but my head is telling me something different.
“No
but she is Neo’s ol’ lady,” Venom announces.
“Then why is she in your arms? I’m confused, my head hurts so much, it’s screaming in my direction,” Raven complains, putting her hands to her head.
“It’s all good, Raven. Look let’s go in the kitchen, I promised Harley some cookies and I know she hasn’t eaten today,” Venom says, urging me in the direction of the kitchen.
Once we’re through the doors, Raven immediately moves as far from me as possible. Weird, I figured she’d be in my face trying to find out why I’m here and asking a bunch of questions.
Venom steps away from me, as I take a seat on one of the stools positioned at the counter.
A moment later Venom places a dark jar on the counter.
“So, that’s where she hides them, sneaky woman,” Raven grumbles, narrowing her gaze on the cookies.
“Yeah, keep your mouth shut so she doesn’t end up moving them,” Venom grunts, pulling out three cookies and hands one to both Raven and I.
“Lips are sealed as long as you make sure to get me one when you get yours,” Raven murmurs, lifting her fingers acting as if she were zipping her lips together.
Smiling, I glance down at the table.
“So, I’m not going to pry because I can see it,” Raven says and my gaze pops back up to meet hers as I begin to shake once again.
“Raven,” Venom warns.
“No, I’m just going to say this, I understand and though the other ol’ ladies will probably be confused, if you need anything please let me know. I’m here and so are they. I will make sure they don’t pressure you in to doing anything you’re not ready for.” I nod at Raven in thanks. I don’t know how but she understands I’m not wanting to speak to her. It’s why she’s on the other side of the room.
“Thanks, Raven. I’m sure, Harley, here will appreciate it,” Venom says sincerely.
“No problem. Goes without saying, we’re family and family protects their own.” Raven grins for a split second before the grin leaves her face and she pales.
“You alright, Raven?” Venom asks.
Raven doesn’t respond as tears well in her eyes and she lifts a hand to her head.
“Fuck,” Venom remarks, throwing his cookie onto the counter and moves to Raven.
Her gaze comes to mine and then moves to Venom’s and back again. “I’m sorry for all the pain you went through. The . . . The winds have been screaming at me all day now I understand what all they were saying.”
The winds?
“Raven is unique in herself, as she’s an empath and spirits, or as she calls them ‘the winds’ speak to her,” Venom explains.
Oh.
“I will keep your secrets, all of them, you have my word but I hope you understand when I say each and every one of us will understand the pain you’ve suffered throughout the years. And as Venom said to you earlier, you’re not alone, you have him, Neo, and everyone else here at the club.”
Shit. She makes me want to trust in what she says. But can I really. I guess time will tell. If anything, maybe I’ll at least feel I can speak to her.
“Thank you,” I whisper quietly.
“You’re welcome. Now how about we get another cookie before the others get here?” she suggests.
Smiling I nod in answer.
Venom moves back to where he’d tossed his cookie down, swipes it off the counter, and shoves it in his mouth. “Sis, told ya you’d be alright here,” he says as he chews.
“Gross, didn’t anyone teach you to chew with your mouth closed?” I ask him teasingly not thinking about the fact Raven was still in the room.
Something about her puts me at ease. It’s probably the fact she understands and from the way she had tears in her eyes and the words she spoke she gets it completely.
Chapter Eleven
Neo
I didn’t want to leave Harley, but I needed to see what my Prez had to say. As I open the door to the Pocket, my ears are immediately assaulted by screams of outrage.
“I didn’t do anything. Why are you doing this to me?” Jezebel screeches.
Fuck I hate that shit. Last time I had to hear a woman scream like that was when we’d dragged Dixie and those two hags out to the woods and burned ‘em at the stake.
“Prez,” I call out, announcing my arrival.
“Neo, figured you’d like to be here during our guest’s questioning,” Stoney remarks.
“Fuck yeah I do. I’m lucky as fuck Harley is trusting me as much as she is,” I mutter, my mind going over the conversation her and I were having when Venom came knocking on the door. I hope she’s okay with him. I know he’ll keep an eye on her but I only just got her here. This isn’t how I wanted to start everything off. But knowing this stupid cunt is to blame for some of the demons haunting my woman I’ll be sure she’s dealt with then get back to Harley and spend the rest of the day making sure she feels comfortable here at the clubhouse.
She might have made the promise of coming to one of us when she starts to feel herself spiraling, but that doesn’t mean I’ll allow her to be far from me or someone else. At least not for a while. I need to see what all will trigger those emotions within her.
“Good, she’ll be okay with Venom, they warned the rest of the clubwhores to stay in their rooms for the time being to give him and her some space. I made a call to Burner, requesting he and his ol’ lady come up here,” Stoney informs me.
I get what he’s saying, with the club voting to leave the ol’ ladies here out of club business I completely agree with his decision. Ally is the best choice to use.
Nodding, I finally turn my attention to the woman barely dressed in more than a G-string and cropped tee. At one point I would have thought the bitch was hot if I hadn’t seen her take cock in all three holes at one time. I don’t give a fuck what my brothers do but that shit ain’t for me. To each their own is my feeling about it. Doesn’t mean I want to see a woman spread her legs, opening herself up to get hurt in the end, because there’s no way in hell my brothers will take a clubwhore as an ol’ lady if she’s willing to be fucked by every other man in the room he calls brother.
Sure, I’ve had my fair share of fuckin’ the clubwhores around here but certain ones I’ve stayed clear of. I’m not blind to their plays and will surely keep the bitches away from my cock, if I even get the hint they’re trying to make a play.
“Shadow, pull her out of the cage,” Stoney orders, circling the room to the bench set up in the corner. “Chain her to the far wall.” Reaching out he turns the stereo system on and immediately Mudvayne’s “World So Cold” begins filling the room.
Jezebel tries her best to escape Shadow’s hold as he grabs the bitch’s upper arm. I step up and help Shadow lock both her arms in the shackles we keep against the wall.
“Why are you doing this?” she cries, glancing in my direction. “Please, Neo, I didn’t do anything I swear.”
“Then explain why you put your hands on my ol’ lady,” I sneer.
“Wh-what? I . . . don’t know who you’re talking about. Ol’ lady?” Jezebel mutters, shaking her head with pleading eyes. “I haven’t done anything.”
“Then explain to us why we have you on video coming out of the bathroom, the very same one she was in,” Stoney demands, stepping forward with a blade in his hand.
“I swear . . . I don’t know what or who you’re talking about,” she protests.
I’d almost believe her if it wasn’t for the fact, I remember how freaked out Harley had been that day and then the fresh image of not even an hour ago, when her first words spoken had been to take her home and her telling us what happened the last time she was at the clubhouse. This monster made my woman, who already had a hard time being around other women, not be able to stand being around them period.
“Normally we’d have a club vote on what to do with you for your crimes against one of our own, but you see there’s a by-law stating when deemed necessary, the president of the club/charter can dispose of said problem
without said vote as long as there is a minimum of two witnesses to attest to the reasons why. Now I’m not one to kill bitches, but for what you did you are no longer seen as a woman, so I have your executioner on the way,” Stoney sneers.
“But I didn’t do anything,” Jezebel protests once again.
“Doesn’t matter what you say, whore, we’ve got you on tape coming in and out of the bathroom. We also have the word of the very woman you assaulted,” Shadow snarls.
“Are . . . you talking about that girl who used to come here a while back?” she asks in confusion.
“That girl as you put it is my fuckin’ ol’ lady and you put your hands on her,” I growl.
“No. She’s lying. I swear, I didn’t touch her. I . . . I mean it. Please don’t kill me. I didn’t do anything to her. She was crying in the bathroom stall I swear . . . she was in there before me and didn’t come out of the stall until I was leaving the bathroom,” she whispers, licking her lips nervously.
That right there is the tell-tale sign she’s lying.
“Don’t worry you’ll be speaking the truth here soon enough,” Stoney snarks and turns his attention to me. “It’ll be a while before Ally gets here. Burner’s also bringing his equipment. I think Whip and Cane wanted to get some new work done, I also thought that he might be able to speak with Harley. I don’t know, he could possibly do for her what he did for Cleo.”
I take a moment to allow his words to sink in. He’d done a beautiful back piece for her to symbolize what he saw in her. Burner has some things in common with Raven but his isn’t as strong as her gifts.
A lot of people think it’s freaky or they’re faking it when they do certain things but I don’t. I’ve seen with my own eyes the truths Raven speaks.
“I think it might go a long way in helping her get through some of the pain within her,” I agree.
