“Adam, please, I’m tired.”
“I need to know what is happening between us Eve. First, Lainey says something about seeing more than you want me to, and then you. Tell me what’s going on.”
Eve frowned. Why would Lainey say that to him? She was just too drained to think about that now. Tomorrow, when she could think straight, when she called Lainey, she would ask her about it. Eve sighed. “I said I’m tired. I can’t do this tonight.” Eve tried walking past Adam to her door, but he blocked her way.
“I’m not leaving. Whatever’s going on between us is keeping me up at night. I can’t eat, I can’t concentrate. You’re consuming my thoughts. We’re going to talk about this. Before you go out of town.”
Eve glanced over and saw her nosey neighbor peeking through her door. Annoyed and exhausted, she pushed past Adam and unlocked her door. “Come in then.”
Whatever he was going to say was forgotten when he saw Eve standing there facing him, her powder blue button down shirt slightly wrinkled and un-tucked covering most of the short black skirt. She looked irritated, tired and amazingly sexy.
Before she could move away, he took her in his arms and crushed his mouth to hers in an almost desperate attempt to relieve the need for her that had been building up inside him.
Eve clung to him. Adam awakened this primal need in her, one that only he knew how to satisfy. Everything, except what was happening to her at this moment, was forgotten as Adam pushed her against the door. His hands were rough, but skilled, touching her to arouse her beyond imagination.
Not able to control himself, Adam pulled Eve’s shirt apart, popping the buttons off, sending them to the floor. He just needed to feel her to soothe this burning desire throbbing inside him. With his powerful thighs, he pushed her legs apart, using one hand to pull her skirt up and the other to unbuckle his own jeans. Finally, they were both exposed and he picked Eve up, wrapping her legs around his waist. He entered her, savagely, pounding inside her. He couldn’t get enough. The chain on the door clanked as his thrusts became faster.
“God, I missed you, Eve.” Adam’s voice was rough with desire as he buried his face in her neck. “I love being inside you.”
Through her burning desire, Eve remembered the scene at her restaurant with Adam and the other woman and the way he placed his hand at the small of her back, the way they laughed with each other. Of course she had done some checking of her own to find out who she was.
“Do you say that to Camille when you’re fucking her, too?”
As quickly as it had begun, Adam froze.
“What?”
“You heard me. Do you say the same thing to her?”
“Eve...”
“Put me down, Adam.” She pushed his shoulders, but he didn’t budge.
“Let me...”
“Put – me – down.”
The look in Eve’s eyes had Adam obeying. Confused, still aroused, Adam buttoned his jeans back up and looked at Eve. She was straightening her skirt and furious.
“How do you know her name?”
It wasn’t what he had planned to say. He didn’t want to be talking about Camille, he wanted to talk about them, but nothing was going the way he had planned it.
Eve’s laugh was humorless. “How did I know? You take her to my restaurant, my club, you son of a bitch, and you wonder how I know? Why, Adam? You knew I’d find out, why did you do it? Did you want to make me jealous?”
“Did it work?”
Eve struck him before she could stop herself. It was the first time she had ever hit anyone and she found she didn’t enjoy it at all. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. Running her hands through her hair, she slumped back against the door. When she had slapped Adam, she saw the look of shock on his face, and now, she couldn’t look at him at all.
“I can’t do this,” she said.
She looked so vulnerable and fatigued that all he wanted to do was hold her.
“You once asked me if I ever hurt.” He heard her say softly. Eve looked up at Adam, and for the first time since he met her, he saw tears brimming in her eyes. “I do.”
His heart dropped. He had never meant to hurt her this way. “Eve.” Adam stepped to her but she held him at arm’s length.
“No. I’m not the one for you, Adam. I’ll never be able to give you want you need. What you deserve. And, what you deserve is to be happy. If she’s the one who can do that for you, then I have no right to keep you from her.”
“You make me happy, Eve. Please don’t do this.” He was scared. More scared than he’d ever been in his life. He couldn’t lose her. “I did it to make you jealous. I admit that. God, baby, I never slept with her.”
He reached out and touched her cheek with his fingertips, relieved when she didn’t push him away. “You have to believe me. She wanted to, but I couldn’t. I never slept with her.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore, Adam.” Eve sighed heavily. “I believe you, but it doesn’t change anything. I can’t do this to you anymore. Go. Please, Adam, just go. Don’t look back, don’t call, and don’t come to the gallery anymore.” The lump in her throat was painful and her head was pounding.
“I’m not leaving you. I need you, Eve, and I know you care about me more than you want to admit.”
“I do. My God, I do. But there are things you don’t know, things I can’t even begin to explain to you, Adam. You would never understand.”
“Try me, baby. Talk to me, please.”
“I can’t,” she whispered. “Please go. You have to go.” Eve pushed him back and opened the door. The tears stung, but she willed herself not to let him see her weep. “Please. It’s what’s best. Forget me, Adam.” Forgive me, she added silently.
“You’re asking the impossible. Please, don’t push me away. I love you, Eve. Let me be there for you.”
“No, don’t say anymore. Please. Don’t make this harder than it already is. Just go.” Eve pushed him towards the door. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. For everything.” On impulse, Eve pressed her lips to his in a brief kiss, regretting it instantly. At that second, she wanted nothing more than to close the door and take Adam to her bed. She just needed him to hold her, to tell her everything would be alright. But, she couldn’t. Not until this mess with Tony was over. When that happened – and it would be soon, she vowed – she could only hope that Adam hadn’t moved on, and could forgive her for hurting him this way.
“Goodbye, Adam,” she said gently, and closed the door before he could do or say anything else. Eve leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. She never imagined she could hurt this much.
“I’m not giving up on you, Eve.” Adam was trying to comprehend what was going on, but he was hurting too damned much to figure it out. “I hope you can hear me. This isn’t over.”
He waited for a moment to see if she would change her mind and open the door. When she didn’t, he took a deep breath and walked away. He would have her back, he swore to himself. He was in too deep to let her get away.
“I hope it isn’t over,” Eve whispered.
Eve stayed huddled on the couch all night, afraid not only of the ghosts that awaited her upstairs but also of the loneliness that filled every part of her.
Lainey lay quietly in bed, awake, worrying about Eve and the journey she will be making tomorrow. She wished, with all her heart that she could make that trip with Eve, to help her fight whatever demons she had to face.
Jack stirred next to her, rolling onto his side and crossing an arm over Lainey’s chest. He felt warm and safe. This part of her life was uncomplicated, she thought when Jack snuggled closer, the total opposite of her relationship with Eve. There were no hidden enemies in Jack’s life, no ghosts haunting him every day, no dangers awaiting him at every corner. The life she had thought of as boring and uneventful, was now becoming a blessing. As much as she wished she had the words, the courage, or even the knowledge of how to make these things disappear for Eve, she didn’t. And, it made her feel unnecessary and
incredibly useless in Eve’s life. Here, in this bed, in this house, Lainey felt needed, by her sons, by Jack. Perhaps it was selfish, but it was something that made her feel good inside. But still she couldn’t forget how alive and desirable Eve made her feel. Eve was the embodiment of excitement and passion, life, love, and even that undeniably fascinating element of danger. Lainey needed Eve in her life as much as she needed her family, and the realization of that rocked her.
She was surprised when Jack lazily stroked her breast, and she could feel him getting hard as he pressed against her body. He had become gentle and loving again, like the Jack she had fallen in love with twelve years ago, and her body reacted the way it had back then. Everything, apart from what Jack was doing to her, escaped her troubled mind, and she turned into his arms. He kissed her softly and rolled on top of her.
“I love you,” he whispered in her ear as he slowly slipped inside her.
“I love you, too.” Lainey arched into him, wrapping her arms around his neck. This is what they have been missing, she thought. The compassion, the attention to each other’s feelings - the love. She gave herself to Jack then, freely and wholly as never before.
Eve sat quietly in the back of the limo. She had taken the time to change her clothes before leaving for the airport, but hadn’t made the call she had promised to make this morning. She didn’t know if she had the strength to let Lainey go the way she did Adam the night before. Lainey would never understand. She would never leave Eve, even if Eve told her that her life depended on it.
She was also not looking forward to telling Lainey about her time with Adam, knowing it would upset her. She hadn’t planned on being with Adam at all, but now found herself wishing she hadn’t stopped him from making love to her, hadn’t told him to leave. She had sat on her couch all night, longing for Adam’s arms to be around her, and the feelings made her experience guilt, even more confusion and contempt for herself. She knew that all she needed was rest, and a little time to think about how she was going to explain any of this to Lainey, but she was so exhausted, she couldn’t think of anything to say that would help her at the moment.
She let her cell phone ring three times before she decided to answer it. After the third ring, she broke down and picked it up, not bothering to look at the caller ID. She knew exactly who it was.
“Good morning, Lainey.”
“Are you okay? I got worried when you didn’t call me.” Lainey relaxed considerably when she finally heard Eve’s voice, but there was something different about it. Something wasn’t right.
“I’m fine. A little tired. I’m sorry I didn’t call, I was trying to get a little rest.”
“Oh. I’m disturbing you.”
“No, you’re not,” Eve interjected. “I’m glad you called. It’s great hearing your voice.” It was the truth. Just hearing Lainey brought Eve a little bit of peace.
“You had a bad night?” Lainey noticed her hand was shaking slightly, and tightened her grip on the phone. How was she going to tell Eve that she had made love to Jack the night before? She hadn’t planned it, of course, but she couldn’t stop it from happening. And, when Jack was holding her in his arms, she realized she didn’t want him to stop. For the first time in a long time, Lainey had felt the way she had when she and Jack were first married. But now, the next day, all she felt was guilt, which was ridiculous. She was married to Jack. She loved him. But she also loved Eve, and the last thing Lainey wanted to do was hurt her. How did she fix the mess she was in now?
“I didn’t sleep very well,” Eve admitted. “Lainey, there’s something you should know.”
“I made love to Jack last night,” Lainey blurted out. “And I feel like I should apologize to you. I didn’t...”
“Stop,” Eve interrupted. “It’s okay.” The nagging pain in her head worsened. “You don’t owe me an apology. He’s your husband and I should expect that you would be with him. I should even be happy for you.”
Eve made sure her voice didn’t betray the hurt she felt inside although she knew she had no right to be jealous or angry. Perhaps if she kept telling herself that she would come to believe it.
Lainey frowned. She should have been happy that Eve was making this easy on her, but she wasn’t. It was absurd to Lainey that she would be offended by Eve’s lack of a reaction. “You’re not upset?”
“Of course I am. I’d be lying to you if I said I didn’t care. But, what can I say about it? I know you love your husband, Lainey. The original plan was to get your relationship with him back on track. You should be happy that it’s happening.”
Eve paused, and rubbed her temple to relieve some of the pain. “In fact,” she went on, “oddly enough, I was just going to tell you that Adam was waiting for me when I got home last night.”
There was a silence on the phone, long enough for Eve to think she had lost her connection.
“Did you fuck him?” Lainey immediately regretted the words the second they left her mouth. Damn it, why couldn’t she keep her emotions in check.
“For you it’s making love. For me it’s fucking?” Eve sighed, too tired to be infuriated. “Forget it,” she said before Lainey could apologize. “Yes, I fucked him. Or, started to at least.”
“I don’t understand.” God, could she feel any more guilt?
“I made the unfortunate mistake of thinking about the woman I had seen him with at the restaurant at a very inopportune time. Then, of course, there’s all of the other shit that’s going on in my life. I just couldn’t let it happen. I told him it was over.”
Eve laid her head back on the seat. If she wanted to win this life and death game she was playing with Tony, she needed to focus on something other than her messed up love life.
“Oh, Eve. Are you sure that’s what you want?” Jealous or not, Lainey still believed that Eve and Adam belonged together. She still saw that Eve felt more for Adam than she would ever divulge.
“No. I want him.” She closed her eyes and thought of Adam. “God, I want him so much. And, I’m truly sorry if saying that hurts you, Lainey. You know how I feel about you.”
No, I don’t, Lainey thought silently, I wish you’d tell me straight out and not in some slip of the tongue.
“If you want him,” she said aloud, “why did you let him go? And, please don’t tell me it was because you’re not good enough for him.”
“It’s what’s best. For everyone. Let’s just leave it at that, okay? Maybe one day, I’ll be able to give him more of me, but for now, this is how it has to be.” Eve paused, remembering what Adam had said to her last night. “He told me what you said to him.”
“I didn’t mean to get involved,” Lainey said quickly. She had never thought about the possibility that Adam would tell Eve. “I hate seeing you hurt, and I thought if I could just say something to help you and him...” Her voice trailed off, and she sat there listening to Eve breathe. The silence was deafening, and she wished that Eve would yell at her, scold her, anything to break this silence.
In her peripheral vision, Eve saw that the driver had made the final turn onto the airstrip, and she would be at her plane in minutes. “I have to go,” she said. There would be no endearments to end this conversation, not when she felt as wretched as she did. “I’ll call you when I get to Paris.”
“Eve, wait. Please. Are we okay?” Lainey couldn’t stop herself from asking and hated the weakness. If she could just hear Eve tell her everything would be alright, she would feel better. When Eve didn’t answer right away, Lainey’s heart sank.
“Yes, we’re okay,” Eve answered finally. “Don’t worry about anything. Don’t feel bad for making love to your husband. Don’t feel any guilt. You’re doing nothing wrong. I - I’ll call you.”
Eve hung up the phone quietly before Lainey could respond, and Lainey sat there listening to the silence for a long moment before replacing the receiver. “Be careful,” she whispered in her empty bedroom. “I love you.”
A shiver ran through Eve as she steppe
d out of the limo in front Madame Bussiere’s cafe. All of the horrible feelings and images came back to her with a vengeance, and it took her by surprise. She thought she had been prepared for this. She was stronger now. Nothing could hurt her. She was here to find answers, and that’s exactly what she was going to do, no matter what she had to do to achieve that.
“Is everything alright, ma’am?” her driver asked her. “This is where you wanted me to take you, no?”
“Yes,” she answered quietly. “Yes. Stay with the car, please. I don’t know how long I’ll be.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Eve nodded and gave him a small smile. With a deep breath, she squared her shoulders and walked back into her nightmares. It wasn’t fear that chilled her to the bone. She knew she was safe, knew there were people watching over her. It was the memories, the smells, Madame Bussiere herself that made her feeling nauseous and even more enraged than she wanted to be. And yet she knew that she must be careful. Anger could cause her to make mistakes. Eve stood at the entrance of the café and scanned the filthy, smoky room. Not much had changed, she noticed. Though the customers’ faces had changed, they were the same sort of people she had served all those years ago. Eve could even recognize a few of the regulars that came in for the watered down wine and awful food. She supposed their taste buds really didn’t matter as long as they could get some gambling in, and any other illegal activities Bussiere could provide for them.
And then she saw her. Madam Bussiere was standing by the bar, one massive arm supporting her weight as she leaned. She was wearing what looked to be the same black dress Eve had seen her wear countless times. The years had weathered her round, unattractive face making her looks even more evil to Eve. Eve’s hands clenched involuntarily by her side, and she willed herself to stay calm. This woman would pay for what she had done to her. But, first, she would give Eve the information she needed.
“Madame Bussiere.” Eve’s voice was smooth, cold and businesslike. “What? No hug for your young protégé?”
Something About Eve (An Eve Sumptor Book 1) Page 37
