by Patrick Kill
PSYCHOTICA
I. THE AWAKENING
Kalep opened his eyes to a sandy, barren plain where a dark, shadowy lake appeared, its black waves eroding the shoreline. He took in his first breath of air since the remission, exhaling into a warm breeze.
He didn’t know how many years he had been asleep. God had been kind to him for some time, letting him slumber in peace. Kalep sat where the bridge abruptly ended, suspended in mid air above the dark waters. There, a wall of mist and fog bellowed against a faint image of the other world, where people lived each day in freedom, without God constantly inflicting his temper upon them. The wall enveloped the end of the bridge, stretching the entire width and blocking any further view of the mysterious lake. Kalep often wondered what would happen if he were to take another step off the end of the bridge. Would his foot land on the bridge in the main world, or would he plummet into the black lake, and be lost forever?
He sat and peered into the wall of mist as images flashed of a world Kalep yearned to be a part of. This main world, beyond the bridge, had grown. It harbored more people and moved much faster than he remembered during his last awakening.
God had become frustrated once again. Something on the other side was obviously getting to Him again. Why else would He awaken Kalep, if not to act on His cruel intentions?
Kalep didn’t fully understand why he was the chosen one, merely created to be God’s plaything, placed alone in another reality so that God could act upon His lesser known urges, cleansing Himself of His darker side.
God was a trickster at heart, possessing a sick sense of humor during one moment, while acting out bizarre fantasies during the next. Kalep doubted that anyone on the other side had ever been this close to God to know His dark side since He rarely acted on it. But Kalep dealt directly with God, being the only inhabitant of a world where the Master observed, abused and replenished only him.
From the base of the bridge, he heard a voice, small and feminine. “Who are you?”
Since the beginning of his time in this parallel world, he had never been in the company of another. Kalep smiled before turning, delighted that this scenario had finally changed. He had watched people on the other side and often fantasized what it would be like to lust and love, to mesh with another being. But these thoughts were short-lived when he realized it would be under the watchful eyes of a god who would most likely use the situation to torment him further.
The woman was a beauty—breasts firmly sprouting from her thin frame, emerald eyes which sparkled and long auburn hair dampened by the mist. She was naked as Kalep realized that he also was missing clothing, though God often stripped him without warning. Once, he found himself dressed as a clown. But instead of getting pies in the face, a cluster of large birds circled splattering him with droppings. Another time he peered down to find he was wearing a pink ballerina dress and soft shoes. As the wind picked up, he found himself dancing across the desert, spinning himself deeper into the sand.
Suddenly a name came to Kalep’s mind as he watched the woman gaze at her surroundings, obviously confused at her sudden appearance from nothingness.
“Erika,” Kalep said, his smile creeping closer.
“How did you know my name?”
Kalep motioned around him. “You’re in His world now.”
Erika looked up into the black hole sky and across the barren plains where dust spiraled into miniature tornadoes. “Who is HE?”
“The master, our creator who has invented us to use for his own sick pleasures.”
Erika frowned and covered her naked body. “You’ve been here before?”
“Yes,” Kalep said, “I stay near this bridge hoping that it will one day be connected to the other side.”
Erika gazed into the blackened sky. “A world of color—blue skies and rainbow-colored birds and green trees and dark and light people. All free… ”
“You’ve described it perfectly,” Kalep said, watching her eyes close. “How did you know?”
Erika shrugged her shoulders. “It just came to mind.”
Kalep watched her gaze into the distorted wall. Images from the other side faded in and out. As she stared through the mist and fog, which hung over the end of the bridge, Kalep felt rage. He was tired of being a toy, a being erased and beaten and simply mistreated for the sole purpose of amusing his Creator. And all just because people on the other side rebelled and denied Him until the Creator turned on Kalep to relieve His pent up anxieties. Kalep could never figure out how a God who created the universe could deem this fair. He often wondered why he had to be the unlucky one and why God couldn’t just turn his anger against the real offenders. He had done it several times in the beginning with the Adam and Eve incident and the whole flood-thing, but then the rainbow-promise went into effect and Kalep had been fucked ever since as he was created on that very day.
“Hey,” he shouted, waving his fist in the air. “I’m sick of this. I want out, I want to be freed from your clutches. I demand you to release me!”
Kalep knew his request was denied when his leg fell off. Blood gushed atop the sand. He waved his fist again as he felt his eyeball pop, his vision blurring in one eye.
“See what I mean?” he spat at Erika who looked on in amusement. “Very funny. I’m a legless, blind freak now.”
Erika covered her mouth, attempting to conceal her laughter. “But at least you’re not dead.”
“Oh, let’s look on the bright side,” Kalep said, clenching his fists. He peered into the now red-tinted sky and yelled, “Fine! Bring it on!—I can take what you got!”
His other leg broke off as he fell into the sand. Kalep maneuvered, attempting to free himself but found himself stuck like a plant tied to a root which suddenly grew hard.
He glanced around, watching Erika grinning as red clouds turned black and threatening. Suddenly a downpour erupted with such intensity that the sand turned to soil crawling with worms and beetles.
Kalep felt himself pulsing and growing. His head began to open up, his skull splitting, as he blossomed, ripe with blood.
A disturbance suddenly shifted the breeze. Erika gasped as Kalep cocked his head enough to see a giant bumblebee circling overhead. The giant insect descended atop Kalep, landing on Kalep’s exposed brain tissue. He felt it siphoning fluids.
“Do you see what I have to go through every time He’s in these moods?”
“This is such a grim world,” Erika commented, watching Kalep’s flesh disintegrating into a murky pool of soup.
“I call it Psychotica,” Kalep gurgled. Erika approached, sticking a finger into his syrupy being and sucking the digit clean.
II THE BECOMING
Kalep’s body had finally regenerated when a wonderful feeling overwhelmed his senses. “My God, I feel horny.”
Erika looked strangely at Kalep then asked, “Why is that?”
“Look around you.”
The barren, mutated plain had been replaced by a bedroom with mirrors and whips and chains and handcuffs. Canisters of whipped cream lined a shelf on a far wall. Battery charged dildos were laid out in progressive sizes on a rubber mat as were vibrators and thickly-studded condoms.
“Oh God, you’re right,” whispered Erika who began exploring her naked body.
Kalep stared on, dumbfounded at his changing luck. “Oh Great Devious One,” Kalep said, folding his hands in prayer and dropping to one knee. “Please let me have this one shining moment in your Grim world. Just one moment of pleasure before further abuse.”
Erika worked her fingers down her body, gently caressing her curves. She seemed aroused at the silky-smooth feel of her own flesh. He could tell she wanted to feel something hard inside her, ravaging her, exploding within her.
She grabbed a canister of whip cream and sprayed it along her waistline, gently massaging it into her flattened stomach and down into the darkness there.
Kalep felt his erection pulse. He grabbed the handcuffs and slapped them on her wrists, binding each
hand to a bedpost. He spread her legs apart as she giggled, wiggling her body seductively upon silken sheets.
Kalep plunged into her, howling madly. He pumped hard, harder, breathing deeply, eyes rolling back into his head. He opened them expecting to be tricked by God into fucking an animal or an overly obese carnival freak that would cradle him like a baby within mammoth folds of rotted flesh. But to his surprise, Erika stared on, licking her lips and pulling his buttocks further into her. She screamed, jerking at the handcuffs and wrapping her shapely legs around his back as he thrust harder.
“Give me the dildo,” she whispered leaning toward him and unleashing her tongue into his ear. For once he felt like he was in control and the notion to retrieve the dildo suddenly seemed like a bad decision as a vast number of scenarios might open leading him to yet another sick scene of mental and physical abuse.
But then, what if He has truly granted my wish, Kalep thought. Then it would be so much more intense.
Kalep took his chance and reached for the largest dildo on the mat above the headboard. Almost before he could hand it to her, Erika jammed it in her mouth and swallowed it completely.
Kalep’s mind spiraled. He thrust deeper, more wild. He felt the first sensation of ecstasy as he slapped her against the headboard. The wall behind them suddenly broke away in a void of darkness. Cool air blew Erika’s wild auburn hair everywhere as Kalep felt the tingling sensation erupting from deep within.
“Yes, yes,” he yelled into the void.
Kalep came through his nose. His eyes watered. His lips cracked and blistered.
“No,” he yelled, feeling his testicles swell with the pressure. “Why me? Just once I would like to be free from You.”
Erika’s vagina kept sucking his penis in deeper as the pressure increased. “Stop it,” he screamed, finally pulling out and scrambling away from her. He sat at the end of the bed examining his manhood. His penis had long since withered, but his balls had expanded like two purple balloons. He focused away from Erika who squirmed wildly while masturbating in front of him. Any further thoughts of her only increased the swelling. He attempted to think repulsive thoughts, but instead only thought about Erika. When he reopened his eyes, another woman appeared, her dark skin shining through the darkness. Her nipples were hard as she draped her body across Erika’s, slowly licking her stomach and working her way up to her breasts.
The woman stopped and turned toward Kalep. “Fuck us both, Kalep,” she commanded. “At the same time.”
Kalep glanced down at his softball-sized testicles, watching them explode, his scrotum launching two fleshy projectiles into the air. The dark-skinned woman lunged off the bed, catching one with her teeth. The other bounced against a far wall where a tiny splotch of blood marked its impact. A mouse quickly emerged from a dark corner, nibbling on his other testicle like it was a cheeseball.
He wiggled his deflated scrotum, feeling defeated and severely depressed. On the bed, the strange woman unveiled her nine-inch tongue and brought Erika to a quick orgasm. Then Erika had handcuffed the woman, whipping her to submission while covering her in a blanket of whipped cream and cherries. As Erika nibbled all over her body she flicked her fingers in and out of the woman who screamed in ecstasy.
Again, Kalep felt swelling, but when he examined himself further he noticed two glowing eyeballs glaring from the cave of his scrotum.
III. THE BROKEN BRIDGE: A PORTAL TO CHANGE
Kalep had tried to commit suicide several times while being trapped in Psychotica. Each time, he found that his own thoughts and urges were only planted there to further amuse the Great Devious One. He had shunned Erika for the night of sex, but found himself watching her in hopes that the wrath would turn against her. But her being a beautiful women, both lively and erotic, made him doubt her existence as being a painful one. Maybe the Master had developed a perversion for a sex toy in his work or maybe just another instrument in Kalep’s ultimate demise.
Kalep smelled his own extinction. It was only a matter of time. The Creator was never one to dwell on an awakening. He usually woke Kalep, played with his mind, abused him, then sent him back into remission. He liked it short and to the point. Kalep had seen this time and time again.
Kalep sat teary-eyed at the end of the broken bridge. He walked down its path, feeling the smooth texture of splintered bone beneath him. In the dark expanse, at the bridge’s abrupt end, he saw the rippling wall, hinting at colors and life beyond the prison of Psychotica. The static waves washed away darkness and spat sounds of what seemed to be laughter.
Or was it screams?
Crouching at the edge, he felt the ripples of separate dimensions. A warm moist enclosure wrapped around his hand, gently luring him. He looked back at the sand and red sky, and wondered if more of the same existed on the other side of the bridge. Could it be a way out or just another entrapment? Was it really an entrance to the main world, or just a cruel illusion which would bring Kalep more pain and disappointment?
“Nothing could be worse than the waiting,” Kalep reminded himself. He thought about Erika’s naked body and how he still longed for her, but he shook the thought off and closed his eyes.
He stepped forward into the rippling void, feeling himself land in fluid and darkness. He splashed, feeling his body suddenly changing. His arms and legs were shrinking, his body seeming to be melting into itself. He felt his backbone contracting and a sort of long, spindly tail forming behind him.
He splashed in the warm fluids of a canal as he frantically swam upstream. Beneath and beside him, other beings came to view with rounded heads and squiggly tails.
His tiny brain pulsed in the horror, his tail thrashing wildly, fighting for speed to beat the rest.
How fucked up is this? he thought, Cast down to some kind of animated sperm. He felt embarrassed knowing God was somewhere snickering at this new development.
Kalep-sperm weaved in and out of traffic, using his frustration to propel him far beyond the rest. Soon the darkness lifted to blood and water, his destination approaching.
As the canal receded to an open area, he saw the dark matter waiting to be broken. He knew that the egg was soft and could easily be penetrated. But he hadn’t won yet, the fluid motions of whipping tails and shaking heads grew louder echoing around him. Some sperm died in the journey—he could see their limp bodies being carried away into the white water rapids, drifting, spiraling, drying up in the folds.
Kalep-sperm dove first into the spongy surface of the egg as he noticed a rather large, deformed two-tailed sperm follow the act. But after Kalep’s tail broke off, the other mutated sperm lost only one while continuing to propel heavily forward by thrashing the remaining tail.
Kalep-sperm’s final thrust broke the seal as he entered.
But he wasn’t alone.
Barely visible through the darkness was the monstrous deformed sperm with a frayed tail and a cyst-like horned head filled with what seemed to be pus or poison. But everything else quickly blurred as the area suddenly contracted, pushing everything together.
IV. REBIRTH
Following conception, Kalep was oblivious to the monster forming beside him, attached to his own body at the shoulder.
But after the birth and the first three years of infancy, he quickly learned to fear the malign growth which sprouted from his own flesh.
His mother had told him about being a Siamese twin. His brother, Dick, grew silent beside him, convulsing from time to time, but nothing more. His growth was as steady as Kalep’s though it resembled something far less human. Dick possessed mere stumps as legs and a slender tube-like head which gave new meaning to his name. From his oblong head, sprouted a giant exposed nasal cavity which harbored a tiny pulsing brain inside. Sometimes Kalep would stretch over to marvel at the inside works of his twisted sibling.
Dick’s eyeballs fluctuated within his skin, just above the giant nasal cavity. A thin layer of skin had closed off both eyelids where only dark movements could be seen. Further
down, there was a tongue always in motion both day and night, flicking madly from side to side like a happy dog’s tail.
But there was no real oral cavity, as the tongue seemed a mere extension of flesh, bordered on all sides by solid skin stretching across the facial area. Dick had to be fed through his ear, into a long canal which somehow connected to his stomach.
Doctors had tried to find ways of separating them, but each time they found out that no matter how much they cut off, Dick would always seem to grow back to his natural state. Some claimed the makeup of the siblings was unreal, a nightmare of nature, imported from another world. Others said it was an act of God, a punishment. When Kalep heard this, he felt strange, like he sensed this was somehow true.
Shortly after, he started having dreams about a sandswept plain and a body of black water in which he swam. An ivory bridge was the only landmark that appeared, but he could never manage to climb onto it. In a few dreams he grasped the end, only to be gouged by its broken nature. He was always alone in these dreams and Dick was neither beside him or in his unconscious wanderings. For some reason, he longed to escape through dark waters, to invade this bridge and disappear into the land beyond. He knew not why, but felt some connection to his father, though his mother claimed he had no father and that her pregnancy occurred without conception. An act of God, no doubt.
Kalep hated life. He yearned to dream away from his imprisonment, to a lonely, but important place beyond the broken bridge. He didn’t care if there was nothing beyond its sandy plain, he just wanted to escape life and all that tormented him. He especially wanted to escape the people who existed around him, those who gawked and whispered and made jokes beneath their breath.
Kalep felt the empty years progress as the urge to flee the house grew steadier. It was a moment of enlightenment that every child comes to in their life (whether having a Dick growing from their shoulder or not)—the realization that the world wasn’t what it seemed. And he was finally reaching those curious days where a boy becomes a man and is overcome by the overwhelming drive to have sex.
