by J. R. Grant
If it’s remotely possible to become any more depressed than I already am, I’ve hit the freaking jackpot. This house is our home, our pride and joy. Kade, his father, and his brother built the foundation with their bare hands- literally from the ground up. All of our memories as a family reside inside our home. Our boys were born and raised there, that’s all they’ve ever known. But now I have no other choice, I have to let it go. I swear, this shit’s going to kill me. I should have kept my eyes open over the years with all of his sneakiness. It’s my own damn fault. I think I’m more pissed at myself for being naïve than anything else.
<> * <>
“Kade, we have to get these bills paid. They’re piling up. I’m getting turn off notices from the electric company. Just give me the checkbook please, and I’ll pay them myself.”
Slamming his beer down on the table, Kade grabs the entire stack of bills and throws them across the kitchen floor.
“Fuck the bills,” he yells, kicking the bar stool out of the way. “And fuck you.”
“What is your problem? I know we have money in the bank. Why can’t you just pay them, Kade, so I can stop all of this worrying?”
Leaning against the counter, my husband looks at me and laughs. “I’m not giving you shit, Lani. I told you a long ass time ago, I would take care of the bills. Not. You. So, back the fuck off and leave me the hell alone.”
Grabbing another beer out of the fridge, he storms over to the trash can, throwing his empty bottles away, and leaves the room without speaking to me.
Zakrie cries from his highchair, “Out, Momma. Out,” snapping me out of my funk.
“I’m coming, love bug. Give Momma one second.”
Squatting down, I gather the bills together and set them on the island with the rest of our junk that’s marked “unpaid.”
After the kitchen is cleaned and Justin and Zakrie are given a bath, I lay them down for the night and retreat to my bedroom. Kade and I are in need of some major discussions, and his ass isn’t running from me anymore. I’m not going through this.
Opening up the garage door, Kade’s not in here, he’s gone. Running down the hall, I head straight down the steps to the front door and open it up. He left, as usual. When the going gets tough, Kade runs and hides. Now I won’t see him until God knows when. Not that I have any clue as to where he goes when he gets like this. In all honesty, I stopped worrying a long time ago.
Still, something’s not right. I can feel it, but I have no idea what to do. Kade’s been acting very sneaky lately. He hasn’t been paying the bills, and he refuses to give me access to anything in the house. He even moved the safe last week when he left after another heated argument. I have no clue as to where he ran off to other than he took all of our important documents and cash we held in there, and hid them all from me.
When I asked him why he moved everything, his excuse was, “I didn’t feel safe where it was at, Lani. And if I don’t feel safe that means it’s not, so I took it to a new hiding place. Damn woman, leave me alone. For shit’s sake.”
Since then, Kade will only give me the credit card or cash whenever I need something. I’m not allowed to write checks, nor am I allowed to see the bank statements. Ever.
<> * <>
Little by little, things are starting to slowly creep up in my mind. And for the first time in my life, I am afraid. I don’t think I have any idea who my husband is anymore, or maybe I never did. Why am I just now putting the pieces of all of this together?
Chapter Eleven
Parker
Sometimes biting your tongue isn’t always easy.
Anger rises through my body every time I think of all this shit. I can’t believe everything Kade has done. The more I piece this fucked-up puzzle together, the more pissed off I am getting. How could he go to sleep all of those nights lying beside his wife knowing the lies he’s been living with in his home- within his marriage- even knowing what he’s done to me- his so-called best friend?
Kicking my chair back, I pace my office, running my fingers through my unbrushed hair. I shouldn’t be the one leaking dirty laundry to someone else’s wife. Best friend or not, this should all be Kade, not me.
Seeing how it’s Lani- my entire world, the one who’s going to be devastated when it’s all said and done- I don’t know if I should wait for that sorry son of a bitch to wake up from the coma before I burst his damn bubble, or go ahead and sit Lani down and tell her what that piece of shit husband of hers has done behind the both of our backs.
How did Kade think he was ever going to be able to get out of this mess on his own? For the love of God, what that bitch did behind my back is unforgivable. Period. But to his wife? That’s a whole different story and totally unacceptable.
How will Lani ever want to live again, knowing the lies her husband exemplified, is beyond me. But right now, I’ve got to do the best I can to keep my composure strong. When the time is right, I’ll sit Lani down and be her shoulder to cry on. That’s about all I can do.
What a dick!
“I’m sorry, Princess. I wish I had better news,” I say regretfully.
“Don’t worry about it, Hawk. You’ve done more than anyone. I could never repay you for finding out what you have so far.”
“You don’t owe me anything, Lani. Ever. As long as you and the boys are okay, then I won’t worry. Until then, you three are my top priority.”
She laughs, but I can tell the sound is forced. “Have I told you how much I love you?”
“Yes, you have, plenty of times. And I love you too,” I reply.
“All right, well I guess I better get off of here and start looking for a job while the boys are being quiet. I think they’re getting stir crazy being up here all the time.”
“I can’t blame them. I should be out there in a little bit, okay? Just tell them to hang tight and we’ll go for some ice cream or something.”
“I’m sure they would like that.”
I loathe hearing how broken she is. It kills me. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make that girl smile. I can speak for the both of us when I say we would definitely be lost without one another.
“Oh, before I forget. I have a question- just something to think about really.”
“Uh-oh. Is it more bad news? I think I’m maxed out for the day.” She says jokingly, but I know she’s serious.
“No,” I laugh, trying to make light of the conversation. “No bad news. Kelly wants to cut her hours back since she feels all over the place with the twins being little. So, I wanted to ask, since you are looking for a job, if you wanted to come in as my office manager and help me out?”
“Really? You want me to work with you?” She chuckles. I love hearing her laugh. “And you won’t get tired of me?”
“You know better than that, Princess. Hell would freeze over before I ever get tired of you. Just think about it, alright? I’ll give you a more detailed job description later. You decide if it’ll suit your needs or not with the boys’ schedule. And no hard feelings if you decline, I promise.”
“I love you, Hawk. You always make me feel so much better.”
“Love you too, Princess. See you in a little bit.”
I’ve got to get out of here. I need a drink or four. Something. Anything to take this feeling away.
<> * <>
“Hey, bro. What’s going on?” Cruz pats my shoulder as I hop up onto the stool. “What brings you out on a week night?” He laughs jokingly. Apparently the bar rat is in full effect tonight. I can smell the drunkenness lingering on his breath already.
Between running my own business and everything else I’ve had to deal with lately, the last thing I need is to stay out at bar all night and be woken up with an unnecessary hangover like the rest of these punks who can’t seem to stay away from the booze. Or the chicks.
Except for tonight. Tonight, I’m going to get fucking hammered- that’s my plan. I won’t be able to walk or talk by the time I leave here. I only hope I don’t say anyt
hing I’ll regret later on, seeing how my cup is half full, and my emotions are all over the fucking place. But I can’t guarantee anything.
“What? Can’t a guy come out for a drink anymore with his buddies?” I ask, my voice filled with sarcasm.
Raising an eyebrow, Cruz looks at me funny and replies, “I didn’t say that, dude. You never come out with us anymore, that’s all. Everything alright, man? Something going on and you need to talk?”
The guy knows me all too well. We have been friends since primary school, the bitch should know me by now.
I know I can trust Cruz and the rest of the guys, but I don’t know all of the details yet. Until I get straight with everything, not just half-ass stories like I have now, I’ll be sure to tell the world what the sick prick did to his family and his best friend behind all of our backs.
The bartender approaches Cruz and I, cutting our conversation short. “Hey handsome! What can I get for you tonight?” Kerri asks, leaning over the counter.
I lift my head up as she speaks, and the first thing I see is her plump breasts right in my face. Damn if they don’t look good right about now.
“Hey, Ker! I’ll get a Jack and Coke if you don’t mind.”
“Got it. Hang tight.” Winking, she walks away with a flirty smile on her face. Maybe it could be a good night after all.
“Dude that chick is something else. You ever think about going after her? She seems to hit on you a lot when you’re in here.”
Shaking my head, I laugh. “I’ve known the girl since the first grade, man. Besides, I’m not you, Cruz. I don’t go around sleeping with random chicks for some kind of hook-up.”
Chugging back his beer, he turns to me and laughs. “Well that, my friend, may be exactly what you need; a random hook-up. Ever think of it that way?” He nudges my shoulder and shifts back on his stool. “When’s the last time you’ve gotten laid? And don’t you dare say since Jules because that shit ain’t even funny.”
He’s right. I haven’t gotten much action since Jules and I split, but I don’t dare announce it to the world, and especially not to Cruz. I love my boy and all, don’t get me wrong, but the bastard has a mouth on him. All of Ocean City to fucking Cambodia will think I’m utterly desperate to score a piece of ass tonight. Not that I wouldn’t mind a good lay every once in a while, I just can’t fathom the idea of banging some off the wall chick and walking out the next day like this prick. Call me crazy, nonetheless, that’s never been my style, my type of scene.
I’ve had my fair share of hook-ups during high school and when we all attended Salisbury University. But since being divorced, I’ve had to learn far too many lessons the hard way about chicks in general. And unless the girl’s name is Lani, I try and keep my distance. I don’t need to get sucked into another unnecessary clusterfuck.
Throwing his head back, Cruz laughs abruptly, causing the bar patrons to turn around and stare at us. “See I was right, wasn’t I? You haven’t been laid in a while, brother.”
Shaking my head, I ignore his obnoxiousness and reach for my Jack and Coke.
“Can I get you anything else, handsome?”
Digging for some cash out of my pocket, I throw a ten dollar bill on the counter. “Nah, I’m good, hun. Thanks.”
Not making any attempt to move away from in front of me, Kerri tips her head down to my ear, laying her upper body across the bar top, and whispers, “Well if you change your mind, Parker, I’m off in a couple of hours. I can keep you company. It’s been a long time since we’ve hung out.” Shifting on her heels, she turns around and walks away, swaying her hips until she reaches the other side of the bar and takes someone else’s order.
Damn…. If I wasn’t so bent up on all this stupid shit, I might’ve said fuck it and taken her up on her offer.
Kerri’s not a bad looking girl, in fact, she’s smoking hot. I just don’t know where she’s been. After Jules sleeping around and then coming back to my bed, that shit just doesn’t sit right with me anymore. I don’t know, I guess you have to get royally fucked over by the one you love in order to understand what I’m saying.
“Talk to me, brother! What’s really going on? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Nothing. Everything. Hell, Cruz, my mind’s running a mile a minute these days. Between work and making sure Lani and the boys are okay, I feel like I haven’t sat still and breathed in what feels like forever.”
Looking out into the crowded bar, I take in the scenery, hoping my mind will relax for a few and give me a damn break. Yeah right, that’ll never happen. At the rate I’m going, I’ll be lucky if I can enjoy these few drinks tonight and not bitch the whole time.
“I hear you. Any new word on Kade’s prognosis?”
“Other than the dick is still in a coma, no.”
Cruz whips his head around and looks at me like I’m crazy. “What the hell, dude? Something pissed you off. Talk to me. You know I ain’t gonna say anything to anyone. We’ve all got our own skeletons, man. What’s going on?”
Sipping back the last bit of my drink, I’m ready to wave Kerri down for another one, but, there’s no need. She walks up to my side of the bar with a refill in hand and the same “I want to fuck you” smile on her face.
“Thanks, Ker. Keep a tab going, would you?”
“Sure thing, handsome!”
After my third burn of liquid courage, I’m starting to feel loose enough to talk about what’s bothering me. My only concern now is keeping the details to a minimum. I don’t want nor do I need anyone, including Cruz, knowing everything just yet. First, Lani needs to be told the truth. She deserves that much, even if it has to come from me and not her own husband.
“Cruz, have you been around Kade when he’s been out at the bar alone? Without Lani around?”
Looking at me questionably, he says, “Yeah man, a couple months before the accident, he started coming out a lot more. He was usually with us three to four nights a week. Why? What’d he do now?”
“I found out a couple of things that I really don’t know how to deal with and thought I could check with you first before shit gets crazy.”
Looking around, he finds an open table and nods across the room. “Let’s go over there and talk. There’s too many nosy leeches in this town.”
“You’re damn right there is.”
I’ve always loved living on the water. The beach is my home and has been a huge part of my life since I was born. But in a small town, word gets around quick, whether you want it to or not, and people have the tendency to start unnecessary drama, adding fuel to the fire. Some of the shit I’ve personally heard is unreal. You would think these bar leeches would have better things to do than talk about other people’s business.
Picking up our glasses, I motion to Kerri where we’ll be seated and to get us another refill before making our way over to the temporary secluded area, until the night crowd starts popping in.
“Talk,” Cruz demands as soon as we’re seated- the eagerness to know what’s going on is written all over his face.
“All right, between you and me,” I exhale, letting out a long breath, “I’ve been taking care of Lani and Kade’s bills since the accident and came across something that shocked the shit out o me.”
Leaning in closer, I continue, “Did you know Kade’s kept Lani from all of their money, not putting her on his bank accounts, only giving her cash or a credit card whenever she’s needed things?”
His expression shows how shocked he is, as he fidgets with his hands, and says, “Are you serious, dude? No, I had no idea at all, man. That’s fucked up.”
“Yeah, well, me either and apparently, that’s just the icing on the cake. Shit goes far, dude, and when I have to sit down and tell Lani everything, it’s going to crush her.”
Cruz leans back in his chair and studies my face. “What are you talking about? What else has Kade done?”
Not believing I’m actually going to say the words out loud about my best friend of twelve years,
I decide to just spit it out- no looking back.
“I found some information in Kade’s safe, a couple of months after the accident, besides the money missing. Shit that don’t look right, man. Anyway, backing up a bit; Veronica Mall from the Bank of Ocean City sat down with me when Lani gave me control over their finances and said Kade’s never put Lani on the accounts. Ever. He had over a hundred grand totaling, in two separate accounts out of D.C., and unfortunately the local accounts had roughly around nine grand. I could only access the ones at the Bank of Ocean City. But still, so far, I’ve had to use every dime to pay their mortgage up through next month. And without getting into those other two accounts, they’re broke, dead broke.”
Running my hands over the scruff on my face, I take a drink and continue, “I found a couple of statements from two of the D.C. accounts in Kade’s name as well as someone else’s when I broke into the safe. And if I find out what I’m thinking is true, shit’s going down, man. I’m warning you now.”
Kade is a dick. This other person and him are messing around with innocent people’s lives. The both of them infuriate me. I can’t stand a fucking liar, let alone a piece of shit spouse who does nothing but destroy the one they so call love.
