by Gina Dartt
“I’m going to inform Irene of this situation as soon as possible,” Hannah spat at Kate as the rest of the family tried to unobtrusively move her away from the conflict. “She’ll know what to do with you.”
“You do that,” Kate responded hotly to the woman’s retreating back. Literally shaking in fury, she turned around to see Susan regarding her with a sarcastic expression. “What?”
“Hey, don’t snap at me.” Susan raised her hands defensively, but the grin on her face indicated she was more amused than embarrassed. “Unlike you, I’m not spoiling for a fight.”
Kate finally looked around, conscious of all eyes glancing in her direction, and she composed herself instantly, shoving her anger down where it wouldn’t control her. Though neither woman had raised her voice, it was apparent that she and Hannah were exchanging unpleasant words, and the entire room had been watching and eavesdropping breathlessly, no doubt greatly entertained by the whole situation.
“Where’s Nikki?”
“She went to the ladies’ room not long after the catfight started.” Rick’s tone was unnaturally even. “I guess she wasn’t as amused as the rest of us.”
Stung by the casual comment, Kate gave him a dark look and immediately headed for the powder room. Inside, she encountered some women from her golf club who took in her stormy expression, immediately cut off their conversation, and hastily vacated the premises. Leaning against the sink counter, Kate was astonished to discover she was still shaking. As she tried to compose herself, one of the stall doors opened and Nikki emerged, walking over to the nearest sink to wash her hands. She glanced at Kate, not appearing particularly upset, but definitely not happy, either.
“I’m sorry,” Kate said after a moment, when Nikki didn’t speak to her. “What occurred out there should never have happened.”
Nikki shrugged. “It’s what I expected. I’m just surprised it took so long for one of your friends to make a fuss.”
Kate was stung once more. “Hannah is no friend of mine.”
“One of your enemies, then.” Nikki pulled some paper towels from the dispenser and dried her hands. “This is what happens. I tried to explain when you first came up with this idea. You just didn’t want to listen.”
“I don’t believe the ranting of one old woman—”
“She just had the guts to say what all the rest are thinking.” Nikki tossed her used towel into the trash bin. “Ultimately, this is how it works in a small town. Keep this life quiet, don’t flaunt it, and people tolerate it to a certain extent. Make a show of it, try to rub people’s faces in it, and you’re just asking for someone to take offense. You thought no one would dare, but you were wrong.”
“I’m not the one that’s wrong, Nikki.” Despite Kate’s best effort, some of her anger spilled over. “Hannah’s the one who’s out of line.”
“Probably, but does it really matter? We’ve made others restrain themselves around us slightly, Kate, but their fear and hatred of what’s different is still going to be the same.”
Kate started to respond and then took a deep breath, forcing herself to consider her words carefully. “Nikki, you can’t keep turning the other cheek. That’s letting them win—”
“Kate, you’ve been gay for all of a few months.” A spark flared in Nikki’s eyes. “You don’t exactly have the experience to know what you’re fighting here. There are far easier and more useful methods to make strides than to march directly into the heart of enemy territory waving your rainbow flag.”
“But that’s the point, Nikki, this isn’t enemy territory. It’s as much my world as theirs, and I’ll be damned if I’ll let these small-minded idiots tell me how I should behave at an event that I’ve attended since I was fourteen.”
Nikki’s jaw firmed visibly. Her eyes were still bright with anger. “You’re right, this is your world. The trouble is, you keep forgetting that it’s not mine. They don’t want me invading their territory whether I’m sleeping with you or not.”
Brushing past her, Nikki strode out of the room, and, jolted by Nikki’s final comment, Kate followed, intending to continue their discussion. But she forgot their argument as she reentered the dining room and found herself transfixed by what had occurred in her absence.
Stephen Elliot III had collapsed across the table, a situation suddenly far more interesting to the crowd than Kate Shannon’s date for the Historical Society dinner.
*
“What the hell happened?” Nikki nudged Susan as Rick lifted the stricken man from his dessert. Another man loosened Stephen Elliot’s collar and checked for a pulse. Stephen was lolling in the chair, mouth gaping open as chocolate mousse covered a face that appeared blue through the brown smears.
“I’m not sure. He must have had a heart attack.”
Nikki gazed around. “Why isn’t anyone doing anything?”
“They are. Rick called for an ambulance. And Dr. Lynch is staying out of the way because he’s a podiatrist and wouldn’t know what to do about a heart attack if he had instructions from God.”
“Oh, dear.” Kate looked horrified.
“Who are all those people around the old woman?” Nikki eyed the group warily.
“You mean Hannah Elliot?” Susan didn’t exactly smile—Nikki supposed under the circumstances, that would have been inappropriate—but she did lift a significant eyebrow.
“Yes, the woman who likened me to a canine.”
As Kate gave Nikki a stricken look, Nikki’s heart twinged at her lover’s obvious distress. With an effort, she relinquished her anger at Kate, deciding it wasn’t worth allowing other people’s attitude problems to come between them.
“Stephen is her grandson and runs the family business.” Susan inclined her head slightly toward the brunette woman hovering nearby, extremely upset. “That’s his wife Denise, standing beside Stephen’s brother, Andrew, who’s the oldest.” Her voice became slightly mocking. “The bored-looking woman is Andrew’s wife, Tiffany.”
“Tiffany?” said Nikki. “You can’t be serious.”
“Hey, some people will name their kids anything. A few tried to shorten it to ‘Tiff,’ but she got so pissed about it, no one dares try it now.”
Nikki studied Tiffany and Andrew, who stood off to the side. Tiffany was the type of blonde that came from a bottle—big, brassy, and bold, rather similar to Rick’s absent Betty, though she didn’t seem nearly as genuine or kind as Betty. She seemed out of place with the rest of the family. Nikki wondered what Andrew saw in her. Probably the hair and boobs, she mused. He looked like the stereotypical hockey player—all brawn and not too many brains.
Perhaps that’s why his grandmother had passed over him in favor of his younger brother Stephen, who at least looked a little more intelligent. More like a soccer player, thought Nikki. And Stephen’s wife Denise looked a bit more socially acceptable than the rebellious Tiffany. With natural-looking dark hair instead of bleached blond, she appeared docile, as if she would be the perfect corporate wife and obey both Stephen and her grandmother-in-law Hannah without question.
Nikki glanced at another man, who had a slight expression of disdain on his face as he patted the voluptuous Tiffany’s arm. He was less stocky than the other men, slighter in build, with darker hair. Definitely a tennis player. “Who’s he?”
“Martin. He’s a cousin with no real money of his own but still manages to live a life of leisure. Don’t ask me how, or why the family lets him stick around because I don’t know.”
Nikki mentally filed that comment away as she and the rest moved out of the path of the paramedics who had finally arrived. The medical personnel applied various techniques on Stephen before lifting him onto the stretcher and wheeling him out as the rest of the family followed in their wake. Then there was a general exodus, the implication being that this dinner, as entertaining as it had turned out, was finally over for another year. Nikki retrieved her coat from the cloakroom and followed Kate and the rest out to the curb, where they hailed a taxi.
“That was sort of a bust,” Susan remarked as they sped down Willow Street, interrupting the awkward silence that had fallen over them.
“I’m sure the society made their target amount.” Kate’s tone was distant, almost inaudible from where she sat in front with the driver. Next to Susan in the back, Nikki miserably glanced out the window at the darkness of the passing streets, not surprised when Kate directed the taxi to her apartment first.
After the car stopped on Queen Street, Nikki mumbled a brief good-bye to Susan and Ted, though she didn’t dare say anything further to Kate, not in front of her friends at least. It hurt when Kate didn’t even look in her direction as the taxi departed.
Blinking back tears, Nikki trudged up the stairs leading to the second floor where her cat greeted her. Powder was quite vocal about being left alone for the evening, though she paid him little mind as she walked into the bedroom. There she removed the expensive clothes and placed them carefully in the closet, aware of how different they were compared to everything else hanging there. After scrubbing the makeup from her face, she removed the contacts and replaced her wire-rimmed glasses, glancing in the mirror. She looked like herself now, not like some stranger she barely recognized. She could change a little for Kate, she thought sadly, make every attempt to try to fit into her world, but in the end, she didn’t really belong there and never would.
Despondently, she pulled on a robe and padded barefoot out to the small kitchen where she made herself a hot chocolate. Carrying the mug to her threadbare sofa, she curled up with Powder, drying her tear-stained cheek against his snowy fur.
The knock that sounded at her door only twenty minutes later startled her. Besides the landlord and the other tenants of the building, the only people who had keys to the lower security door were her mother, her friend Kim, and, of course, her lover.
Wiping her eyes, she went to answer the door. Kate stood outside on the landing, looking greatly forlorn.
“May I come in?” Her voice was soft, barely audible.
Wordlessly, Nikki stepped back, raising her arm to indicate Kate was welcome to enter, but not quite ready to go further than that.
Kate bent her head and walked past her into the living room, where Powder glared at her with dislike and pointedly leapt from the sofa. Sauntering past her with his tail in the air, he displayed his utter disinterest in the whole situation in every line of his sinuous body. He had yet to warm up to Kate, and she returned his antipathy, though both maintained a sort of polite regard toward each other for Nikki’s sake.
“I owe you an apology.” Kate turned to face Nikki, her eyes dark and unhappy.
“For what?”
“For making you go to that dinner. For forcing you to play a role you weren’t comfortable with. I didn’t listen to what you needed, and I’m sorry.”
Nikki felt her chest fill with love and tenderness for this woman in front of her, and she inhaled deeply, trying to loosen her throat so that she could speak without bursting into tears. “You didn’t force me to do anything. It was my decision to go to the dinner.” She stepped closer, within arm’s length. “I’m really sorry it didn’t turn out the way you hoped it would.”
Kate looked defeated, and Nikki felt her heart ache. She gently pulled Kate close, wrapping her up in a warm embrace. “It’s all right. I know it’s not easy to face things like that. You were so brave to try. I should have been more understanding, more supportive—”
“But you were right.” Kate’s voice was muffled as she buried her face into Nikki’s neck, surrendering to her embrace. “I shouldn’t have tried.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Nikki corrected immediately, resting her cheek on the auburn hair. “I know it may have sounded like that when we were at the hotel, and I’m sorry. I know you have to try, Kate. We both do. I just hate that you’re so hurt when it doesn’t work out.”
“Damn that Hannah, anyway.” Nikki could hear the anger bubbling to the surface again.
She made a small sound and nudged Kate over to the sofa, where they sat down. “If it’s any consolation, she has more important things to worry about now.” Curling a leg under her other thigh, she gazed at her lover.
Kate managed a wan smile and rested her chin on one hand. “I’m sorry about everything that happened tonight.” With her other hand she brushed a strand of Nikki’s hair back from her face. “I’m sorry for dropping you off without saying good night. I’m sorry for using you to rub the town’s faces in it. I’m sorry for being...well, for being such a damned fool.”
“You’re not a fool.” Nikki captured Kate’s fingers and brushed her lips over the knuckles. “I’m sorry I ran out on you while you were talking to the old woman. I should have stood by you instead of trying to avoid the confrontation. That was cowardly of me.”
“It’s not your job to put up with the fools in this town.”
“It’s not yours either.”
Kate stared at her before grinning ruefully. “I guess it isn’t. You know, I didn’t even tell you how spectacular you looked tonight.”
Nikki dipped her head, suddenly bashful. “Thank you. I wanted…I hoped that I looked good enough for your dinner.”
“Good enough? My god, darling, you put everyone there to shame.”
Nikki shrugged, pleased but aware of being a trifle uncomfortable. “Kate, you know that isn’t really me. I mean it’s fun to dress up once in a while, especially for you, but—”
“I know.” Kate tilted her head, trying to catch Nikki’s gaze. “I don’t ever want you to be someone you’re not, darling. That’s not what tonight was about. I’m just saying that you were absolutely exquisite, and I’m flattered you’d make such an effort for me.”
Nikki stared at her, then nodded. “All right.” She squeezed Kate’s fingers gently. “I’m really glad you came back.”
“I couldn’t imagine going back to my apartment without telling you how much I love you.” Kate slid closer. “Once the taxi dropped Susan and Ted off at their hotel and took me home, I just sat there outside my building. Finally, I asked the driver to bring me right back here. He must have thought I was crazy.”
Nikki leaned over, touching her lips to Kate’s. “I love your craziness,” she murmured.
“As long as you do.” Kate returned the kiss, her mouth soft as it lingered on Nikki’s. “I promise to make tonight up to you, darling. What can I do?”
“You don’t have to make up anything.”
“Oh, but I want to.” Kate nuzzled her. “Please, let me do something for you.”
Nikki wrapped her arms around Kate, suspecting she would have to come up with something because Kate simply wouldn’t let this go.
“What are you doing during the last weekend in May?” She nibbled a tender path along her lover’s jaw.
“I’m all yours,” Kate promised without hesitation, her respiration increasing measurably. “Why?”
“It’s the annual canoe trip down the Stewiacke River.” Nikki slipped her hands over the silk of Kate’s dress, finding the zipper at the back and slowly drawing it down. “It’s with Nova Pride, the gay group.”
Kate chuckled, half in amusement, half in sensuality as Nikki’s fingertips traced back up her spine. “I suppose that’s fair. You came to one of my functions, so I suppose I should go to one of yours. But I have to warn you. I’ve never been canoeing in my life.”
“That’s okay.” Nikki put her hand on the outside of Kate’s leg and slipped along the warm, nyloned smoothness of it, sliding beneath the hem of the dress. “There’s a first time for everything. Besides, I’d never let anything happen to you.”
“Promise?” Kate caught her breath as Nikki trailed over to the inside of her thigh, stroking lightly.
“Promise.” Nikki paused for another kiss, one that left them both shaking. “Stay the night?”
“Do you really think I could leave at this point?”
“I would hope not.” Nikki rose to her feet, stretching
out her hand in invitation that Kate readily accepted, then leading her to the bedroom.
Chapter Three
“He’s really dead!?”
Kate opened her eyes and blinked sleepily in the morning light, rolling over in a bed still warm from her lover’s body. Through the door, she could hear Nikki in the living room, undoubtedly talking on the phone. Sunshine spilled across the bed, and the clamor from the birds on the wires outside made it difficult to hear the rest of the conversation clearly. Though she wondered what had inspired Nikki’s outburst that woke her, Kate didn’t get up. She would find out all the details once Nikki rejoined her.
In the meantime, she wiggled happily against the warm flannel sheets and glanced around the room. On the far wall was a bookcase full of Nikki’s hardcover books, a wicker hamper for dirty clothes, and a huge cedar chest that was the only quality piece in the room. A cheap pressboard dresser completed the circle, standing beside a door that led into an extra room too large to be a closet, yet wasn’t a second bedroom either. Nikki stored all her camping gear there, along with old computer parts and other absolutely useless items she seemed unable to throw out. It also contained her weight bench and assorted free weights.
Although the room had no sense of style or planned decor, Kate adored her surroundings. Here she had first understood what being with a woman really meant, where she had found the precious intimacy missing for so much of her life. This bed, though not the most comfortable, was a small haven where Kate first realized that she could sleep in another’s arms, safe and at peace, snuggled close against the soft, smooth body that welcomed her without reservation.
She started slightly as Powder entered the bedroom and jumped up onto the cedar chest where he settled on his belly, tucking his snowy paws beneath him. His green eyes became slits as he finally surveyed the bed, not so much looking at Kate as looking through her.
Kate knew that she and Nikki were still in that initial, insane time when all they could think of was being with each other every second of every day. Only now, they were considering their future with their heads as much as their hearts, acknowledging what exactly each might bring to such an advancement in their relationship. For Kate, one of the issues to be faced before their eventual cohabitation was a feline that didn’t necessarily like her. How she and Nikki would ever work that problem out was something she couldn’t imagine at this point.
