Ollie shakes his head, pulling my hand away. He starts to place small kisses down my chest, and my body arches toward him in response. His lips move lower. “Stay,” he begs, his mouth ready to undo me completely. Knowing I am seconds from promising any demand he makes of me just so he’ll touch me, I reach down to push him away. He catches my hands with one of his. He grips onto my wrists, holding them in place over my head. “Stay,” he moans against me as my eyelids flutter shut.
I writhe and squirm against him as he explores me, and all I can call out is, “I’ll stay. I’ll stay.”
The next morning, we’re both a bit quiet as we dress. Reality has a way of doing that to a person. I scramble to find my shirt when I spot Ollie learning against the door holding it in his hand. I reach for it and he grabs onto my wrist, pulling me close to him. He presses his forehead against mine and closes his eyes. “Ryans,” he breathes.
I place my hands on his face and pull back. “I’m still here,” I promise.
“For how long?” he asks, his voice breaking.
I swallow. “I don’t know.”
“We could make it work,” he assures me. “I’d keep you safe.”
“Oh, Ollie, you’re the most eligible bachelor in the world. I’m just the girl who can kick a futbol and failed out of college. They’ll eat me alive,” I reply.
Even your father thinks so, Ollie. I don’t stay the words aloud. They’re too painful.
“I wouldn’t let them,” he promises. “I’m not me unless you’re here. Don’t you see that? I’m lost,” he chokes, looking away from me. He runs a hand over his face.
Lost.
God, I know the feeling.
“Please say you’ll try, or at least that you’ll take the next few days to think about it,” he asks. “Don’t let what Aiden said back there ruin us. He loved you, Ryans. I know it. I saw it. Hell, it almost killed me sitting back and watching it unfold for all those years. The only reason he didn’t defy my father was because he wasn’t willing to ask you to try. I’m not as selfless as Aiden. I’ll ask you what he wouldn’t. I’ll ask you to try.” I look away, my cheeks burning pink at the mention of Aiden. Ollie lifts my chin with his finger. “Do you wish he would have asked you to risk it? Is that why you blush?” he asks, touching my cheek.
I reach up and place my hand over his. “No, Ollie. I’m embarrassed when I think back to those days, but not because I wish it was him in this room with me. I blush because of all the time I wasted. How foolish I was to not realize it was always you. You who always made it so easy to be me.”
Ollie’s lips are back on mine, and it fills me with a warmth that threatens to burn me straight through, but that’s what you get when you play with fire. When he pulls away, I find myself leaning in for more. “Listen to me, Ryans,” he begs. “I know how to handle the press. I can make this work.”
“You know how to handle the press?” I ask, raising an eyebrow. “What about the latest scandal?”
“Freddie’s right. We’ll take care of it,” he replies. The happiness, which felt so lost to Ollie last night, seems to have returned. His eyes are bright, his smile easy and infectious.
“You didn’t seem so sure of that yesterday,” I remind him. “What changed?”
“You came to my room,” he whispers lowly, seductively into my ear. “With you by my side, we can do anything.”
I open my mouth to protest, but Ollie drops to his knees in front of me. “Must I convince you again of what you promised last night?” he asks. He slides a hand up my leg toward my hemline. “Stay,” he says again, reaching for the button of my jeans.
I catch his hand in mine, running my other one through his hair. “A prince of England on his knees begging me to stay? How could I say no to that?”
“You can’t,” he grins, pulling his hand from mine. He starts to take off my pants.
I don’t promise to stay, but I don’t say I’ll go, either.
Chapter Twenty-Five
16 Years, 1 Month, and 1 Day
“Are you going to sit there and giggle into your beer the whole time, or are you going to drink it?” Ollie teases. He knocks his pint against mine.
“You look ridiculous,” I laugh, shaking my head.
“Perhaps, but I don’t look like Prince Oliver, third in line for the throne of England, so that’s really all that matters.”
I lean back in my chair and look over the three Dudley princes, all donned in a variety of wigs and prosthetics. “Yes, but somehow, you’re the only one who looks like…”
“…a dodgy wanker trying to sell you a used car?” Aiden interrupts.
“Yes! Yes, that’s it exactly!” I howl, wiping the tears from my eyes.
While the rest of us had chosen simple wigs that shielded our original hair color, contacts that hid the natural hue of our eyes, and prosthetics that only shifted the shape of our noses, Ollie had gone all out. I could still see a bit of Freddie and Aiden under their costumes, but he had become someone new entirely. How well he slipped into being someone else.
All this so we could pretend to be normal teenagers.
“Is that why you agreed to sneak off to the pub with us? To take the piss out of me where Mrs. Wright can’t reprimand you?” Ollie grumbles. His eyes dart back and forth between Aiden and me.
“I came because I was afraid you would cause a scene, and the next thing I know Parliament would be voting to dismantle the monarchy,” Aiden jokes before waving down a waiter and asking for a water for Ollie.
Ollie shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “Of course. One afternoon of me in a pub and the monarchy crumbles.”
“Stranger things have happened, Ollie,” Freddie chirps in. “You managed to get Aly to let you kiss her, so anything is possible.”
I nearly drop my beer. My eyes shoot over to Aiden, who, suddenly, has become very focused on studying the contents of his glass. “It…I mean…it…the kiss…it was nothing,” I stammer. “I was afraid that tosh pot Brian Belton was going to try and do it at my birthday, and it wasn’t right his being my first kiss. Believe it or not, Ollie was certainly better than that,” I try to explain.
“She certainly could have done worse,” Ollie replies, amused.
I stare daggers at Ollie before turning my attention back to Aiden. Nothing happened since my birthday a month ago, but that didn’t mean things hadn’t changed between us. “It was silly. Meaningless,” I explain.
“Ouch, Ryans,” Ollie replies, clutching at his chest in a show of fake outrage.
“Aiden—” I start.
“Bollocks! As much as I would love to sit here and hear you try and explain a kiss that meant nothing to a bloke who wouldn’t know a good time if it hit him upside the head, I’m in need of another pint,” Ollie says. He grabs his glass and heads toward the bar.
“We’re just teasing you, Aly,” Freddie assures me. “Probably best if I go watch over him,” he continues, nodding toward Ollie before leaving me alone with Aiden.
I open my mouth to explain, but Aiden grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze before lifting his pint of beer. “Cheers, Aly,” he says.
I furrow my brow before clinking my glass against his. “You’re not upset?”
“About you kissing Ollie?” he asks. I nod. “It was before…”
“Before?” I ask. “Before what?”
“Before,” he repeats, his cheeks turning pink.
I pull my hand from Aiden’s as Ollie and Freddie return with another round of beers for the table. Clearing my throat, I shift in my chair, hoping no one can read my happiness at Aiden’s words all over my face. He is so much more mature than I am. So noble and graceful. Everything I’m not, and everything I want to be.
“How about a game of billiards?” Aiden suggests.
“Only if Aly agrees to be on my team,” Freddie insists.
“Well, that’s not fair! You’ll be guaranteed to win,” replies Ollie. “She’s clearly the best. Hell, just being on her team, you’re lik
ely to play ten times better at any sport you try.” I stare at Ollie openmouthed. “What?” he asks.
“Was that an actual compliment that slipped out? You must be drunker than I thought you were,” I say with a wink.
Ollie sets his beer down and traps me with his eyes. “You make everyone better at anything they do, Ryans. You see greatness in even the most inadequate of people and inspire them to believe in it themselves.”
“Are you completely knackered?” I laugh. I inspire greatness? How could anyone think that about me?
“I will be if you keep using British slang,” he drawls. “It burns my ears. I’ll need to drink more to stop the pain.”
He clears his throat before looking away, and I wonder why the sudden change in mood? I follow his gaze toward the dance floor. It’s packed with people laughing and twirling and swaying to the music. There’s a reckless freedom in it, and for some reason, sitting between Aiden and Ollie, I feel like I’m suffocating. I turn toward Aiden. “Will you dance with me?” I ask him.
“In front of all these people?” he asks. “It wouldn’t be proper.”
Ollie turns his attention back to the table. “It wouldn’t be proper?” he scoffs. “It’s a dance not a mating ritual.”
If Aiden’s cheeks were pink before, they’re crimson red now. “What if someone figured out who we were?”
“Because the way you swing your hips is a telltale sign?” Ollie asks. “Oh, look! I recognize that arse! It’s bloody Prince Aiden.”
“It wouldn’t be appropriate,” Aiden says to me, ignoring his brother.
“It wouldn’t be appropriate to dance with me?” I ask softly.
Ollie abruptly stands up and holds out his hand. “Let’s go,” he demands. I glance over at Aiden, who won’t meet my eye. “Come on, lass.” Between feeling a bit miffed at Aiden’s refusal to dance with me and knowing Ollie won’t take no for an answer, I agree.
Three songs in and Ollie and I show no signs of slowing down. He spins me and dips me and spins me again, and we’re both left breathless. “Do you want to stop?” I ask, taking note of his ruddy cheeks and sweaty brow.
“Never!” he says, dipping me again. He pulls me back up with such force that I crash into him. I wrap my arms around his neck to keep from toppling over. “I can go all night,” he boasts.
“Don’t be gross.”
“I wasn’t! If that’s where your mind went, Ryans, that’s not my fault,” he replies, waggling his eyebrows.
“Ugh!” I exclaim. I attempt to stomp on his foot, but he’s too quick. The tempo of the music changes, and Ollie and I slow to a sway. “Why did you tell them about our kiss?”
Ollie shrugs. “I didn’t realize it was a secret. Should I not have?” he asks, glancing behind me toward the table where Aiden and Freddie sit. “It didn’t mean anything, so why not tell them? Right?”
Of course it hadn’t. Not a thing. I lick my lips as the memory of the moment flashes in my mind. “It’s just…”
“Just what, Ryans?” he asks. He pulls me closer.
I try to put it in words, but I can’t. While it hadn’t meant anything, it still felt like a secret. A stolen moment just about us. How to say that without sounding insane? It’s not like I have feelings for Ollie. I’ll sound crazy. I shake my head. “Nothing, Ollie. It’s nothing.”
Ollie stops dancing and looks down at me. My breath catches in my throat at the intensity of his stare. “Here’s the thing. The fact that a girl like you would let me kiss her, well, how could any man not boast of that?”
“A girl like me?” I repeat. For a second, one wild second, I wonder what it would be like if I let Ollie kiss me again.
“Ryans?” he whispers. I stumble back from Ollie. I look over my shoulder at Aiden, who sketches on a napkin.
Aiden.
I want Aiden.
“Are you all right?” Ollie asks, concerned.
“I think I’m a bit drunk,” I say, offering a weak laugh.
“Ryans.”
“We should get back,” I say, nodding toward the table.
Ollie swallows hard. “Yeah, whatever you want.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
22 Years, 10 Months, and 8 Days
“It was always him. Wasn’t it?” Aiden asks me quietly as we both wait outside his father’s study. As soon as we returned to the palace, Ollie disappeared behind this door. Nearly an hour after he first entered the room. Still, Aiden and I wait around. I’m not going to leave Ollie when he needs me the most, and, apparently, Aiden feels the same.
“Yes,” I breathe, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“I think I knew that. Deep down, at least,” he admits. “It’s why I never could commit. It wasn’t that I didn’t care for you, Aly. God knows I did.”
“And I for you. You were my first crush,” I reply, offering a small, pained smile. How much grief we had all caused each other because we couldn’t be honest about how we felt.
“You were mine, too. How lucky I was that you even gave me the time of day,” he says good-naturedly.
I shake my head at his compliment. Looking up at Aiden, I realize the dark circles under his eyes that I first noticed the night of the gala have grown darker. “Aiden, may I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Are you happy?”
“Oh, Aly, are any of us happy?” he asks. He scratches at the back of his head sheepishly.
“Freddie sure seems so,” I point out.
At the mention of his brother, a smile lights up Aiden’s face. Despite their many differences, Aiden and Ollie have a lot more in common than either one is willing to admit. Aiden denied himself all the things he wanted for himself while Ollie sold himself as a joke. All in the name of the Crown. “Yes, well, he is quite a bit smarter than the rest of us,” Aiden teases. “We all struggle to navigate this life, and he does it with ease.”
“I understand why things didn’t work between us. I know it was about more than just what your father said, but what about the drawing? Why give it up?”
“It was more practical to go into business. Isn’t that what this all is? A business?” he asks with a shrug.
I reach out and touch Aiden on the arm. “No, you’re not a business. You’re a bunch of adorably silly boys who deserve to be happy.”
Aiden smiles down at me and places his hand over mine. “If you really believe that, then why are you planning on leaving here the minute the wedding is over? Nothing makes Oliver happier than you, and I have a sneaking suspicion it’s the same for you.”
I’m saved from answering Aiden’s question when the door to the king’s study opens. I take a deep breath, bracing myself for the fallout from the story about Ollie, but when he steps into the hall, he’s grinning. Even though I can’t quite comprehend what he has to smile about, a wave of relief washes over me.
Ollie pulls me into his arms and plants a kiss on my cheek before spinning me around. “Let’s get out of here before my father changes his mind,” he urges.
Aiden furrows his brow in confusion. “I am assuming things in there went well?”
Ollie slaps his brother on the back. “Can we talk later, brother? I think there’s a lot we need to work out.”
Aiden’s eyes shoot over to mine as he silently asks me to make sense of this happy, forgiveness-seeking Ollie. All I can do is shrug and smile. In fact, I’m grinning from ear to ear. “Yes, Ollie. I look forward to that.”
“Africa?” I ask in awe. “You’ve always wanted to go there.”
“I know!” he exclaims, throwing up his hands, beaming with joy. “I’m not sure if my father thought he was punishing me or offering me an escape, but I couldn’t ask for more.”
“Tell me again what he said,” I reply, reaching out and touching him on the knee. Ollie goes through it all again with me. How his father was disappointed by the story. How embarrassed Ollie was to have to talk about his many indiscretions, but how it was the first truly honest convers
ation they’d had in years. How the king informed him that he was sending Ollie around the world on a series of diplomatic missions as an ambassador for the palace. He would work with charities, decide which causes the palace would support.
The whole time Ollie talks, his eyes lighting up with the prospect of visiting this place and that place, I find myself unable to stop touching him. A small touch on the knee or the arm or the foot as we sit cross-legged on my bed talking like we used to when we were children.
He’s leaving. Here I was warring with myself about staying or going, and Ollie is leaving. The thought of being separated from him crushes down so hard against my chest, I can barely breathe. Every time I reach for him, I’m reminded that he isn’t mine to keep.
He never was.
“I think he’s sending me on the trips to work on fixing my image, but, God, Ryans, just think of it—freedom. I mean, yes, I’ll still be working for the Crown, but think of all the things I’m going to get to see and experience. Far, far from here.”
I force the biggest smile I can muster. “You’ve always wanted to go out and explore the world.”
Ollie reaches over and takes my hand in his. “And now I can do it with you.”
“What are you talking about?”
Ollie’s grin grows bigger, if that’s even possible. “Father said you could come with me.”
I swallow, reaching up and running a hand down my hair. “But why would he allow it? You heard what he told Aiden. Remember the whole ‘she couldn’t be queen’ thing. He doesn’t think I can handle all of this.”
And he’s probably right.
“Well, first of all, a few of my brothers would have to die first, and even then, I’m sure Parliament would rewrite some laws changing the line of succession before they would ever let me sit on the throne, so we don’t quite have to worry about anyone here becoming the next monarch.”
“That’s not the point,” I mumble.
“Second of all,” he continues, ignoring my protest, “I told my father he was a daft cow for thinking you couldn’t handle anything life threw at you. For not recognizing you as the single greatest human being in all of existence.”
Royal Attraction Page 17
