by Harper Sloan
"Thank you, baby. That was very sweet of you. I'm really glad that, if I ever need Cheese Whiz and anchovies, spinach, or olives, you've taken care of it."
And just like that, my chest puffs up a little more. Damn, I'm good.
She rolls up to stand on the balls of her feet; I bend down and meet her lips for a few small kisses.
"Go on and relax. Dinner should be ready in about thirty minutes."
"All right, baby." She smiles, shakes her head, and walks away.
I hear the TV click on before I turn back to the stove and finish cooking dinner for my woman.
(Chelcie)
I have never tried harder to keep my face blank. To keep the laughter that is threatening to burst loose. When I opened my closet and came face to face with two small, black fridges, I was instantly confused. But when I noticed what they were full of, it all started to click together.
Every cabinet and closet I looked in had been stashed with more odd foods. There were nuts in the bathroom drawers. There were chips--of almost every brand and style--stuffed in the guest bathtub. Apparently, I have a small juicer in my closet too.
But even as funny as this is, I can't help but love him a little more for how much thought he put into his weird stocking.
I round the couch, grabbing the remote and clicking on the TV as I go. I spot the mail and snatch it up before settling on the couch. When I lean back, I feel it. I've felt it a few times before, but this time, I can clearly feel my son making his presence known.
"Asher!" I scream, a huge smile taking over my face.
He comes tearing into the room, looking all over for a threat before settling his confused eyes on me. "What's wrong?" he gasps.
"Come here! Hurry." I keep my hands in the spot, the spot he is steadily kicking against from my womb. "Here, give me your hand!" He reaches out without question, kneeling on the floor next to my leg. "Do you feel it?"
"Do I feel what, Sunshine?" He hasn't stopped looking at my belly, where my hand is pressing his larger one hard against my swollen stomach. I wait for it, praying as hard as I can that I get another firm kick. It takes a few minutes before I know he's felt it. His eyes widen, and I watch as complete euphoria takes place of the confusion. His eyes shoot up to mine and I smile at him.
"Can you believe it?" I whisper, afraid that, if I speak any louder, I might scare the baby and he will stop.
"Beautiful," he murmurs under his breath. Looking back up at me, he continues. "Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for making sure I shared that with you, Sunshine." He leans in and gives me his sweet kiss before bending down and placing one against my belly. "God, I love you--both of you," he says with a smile.
"I love you too, and if you want me to keep loving you as much as I do, you need to go cook my dinner."
He throws his head back, his rich laughter raining around me, and I love every second of it. I watch him walk back, his firm cheeks looking hot as hell in his shorts.
Damn, I'm one lucky woman.
"Ten minutes," he calls from the kitchen.
"Gotcha."
I turn my attention back to the mail. Just bills, gossip magazines, and some junk. Apparently it's been a few days since I checked the mail. It's never full of this much junk. I am just about to toss everything except the bills when I catch an envelope that must have fallen from my pile. It's just a plain, white envelope with my apartment number on it. Weird.
After tossing the other mail on the coffee table, I peel the back open and pull out the folded piece of paper before unfolding the single sheet and flipping it over so I can read the print. I gasp when I see the words that are staring back at me.
If you know what's good for you - you'll back the fuck off now. Or else.
Oh my God! I can't stop my body from the uncontrollable fear that has taken over. My muscles have seized up in horror of what I hold in my hands. Coming out of my shock, I throw the letter from my grasp and jump from the couch before running into the kitchen.
Asher looks amused at first--until he sees whatever look I'm sporting.
"Chelcie, what is it? Are you okay?" He starts roaming his hands along my body, looking for something visible that would make me this upset.
I just keep shaking my head, my breathing becoming erratic. His eyes get hard, and I can see the panic he's trying to hide.
"You have to tell me what has got you so upset so I can take care of it. Please," he begs.
Words are still beyond me. I pick my hand up and point one shaky finger towards the living room.
"You stay here, okay? I'll be right back."
I nod my head and hear him walk through the apartment. I know when he finds it because I hear his roar and feel its power shake the walls.
He comes bursting back into the kitchen; his arms go around my body. One arm is holding me tight at my waist, the other cradling the back of my neck, holding my head to his chest. I can feel the power of his anger raging in his body.
"I promise you--I will find out who the fuck sent that. You let me take care of this, Chelcie. I mean it. No harm is going to come to you or our boy."
I continue to shake in his arms, terrified for him, the baby, and me. He doesn't let up on his hold. I can smell our dinner burning, but I can't stop my body from the overpowering dread. What does this mean? Who was that for?
And more importantly, what now?
Chapter 24 - Chelcie
"That's all it said?" Izzy asks from the floor, where she's playing with Nate. She's been in the same spot since she arrived at my apartment earlier.
"Yeah. Scary, right?" I look around, meeting each of their eyes.
Izzy looks confused, Dee's worried, and Melissa looks pissed.
"What did Asher say?" Dee questions.
"He told me not to worry about it. That he would take care of it, but it's been two weeks and he's been so distant lately. He's gone before I wake up and I'm already asleep when he comes home. The little that I have seen him was in passing when he came home to change his clothes."
I've been so worried about the distance between us. I've tried to talk to him about it, but every time I try, he just gives me one of his sweet kisses and tells me to stop worrying. I'm terrified and I feel so alone.
"He's been at CS. Axel says that he's there every morning and stays long after they all have gone."
"Goddammit. He's researching that man again! I thought we had moved past it. I mean, I knew that he was still looking into him, but I didn't think it was as bad as before."
My heart hurts. I think I've known that there was a chance that even my love wouldn't keep him from this crazy, quest for vengeance. There can't be anything good that comes from his bloodthirst to avenge Coop's death. I get it--I really do--but that doesn't mean I don't feel hopeless to stop this.
"What man?" Izzy asks.
"Dominic Murphy," I shudder. "The man who put everything in motion. The man who is single-handedly responsible for everything that happened to you, Dee. And the man Asher is hunting so that he can make him pay for Coop's murder."
All of their eyes widen. I know Dee knew that he has been researching him, but I don't think anyone besides Maddox and I knew just how deep he was swimming in this shit.
"Do you think it's from him?" Melissa asks with worry clearly written all over her face.
She hands one of her twin daughters--Lyndsie, I think--over to Dee and shifts the other sweetheart onto her shoulder to give her a burp. I look over at Dee, who is doing the same. I have no idea how Melissa has learned to breastfeed both babies at the same time.
I meet her eyes and let her see my worry. Maybe if she talks to Greg, he can talk some sense into Asher. "I can't imagine anyone else it could be. I don't know anyone here beyond all of y'all, and unless Dee is pissed that I'm no longer working for her, then I can't comprehend who else it could be. It makes sense. Who else would say that?"
The whole situation is both confusing and terrifying. I can't even leave the apartment without becoming so fearful
of my surroundings that I'm teetering on the verge of having a panic attack. And I know my rising anxiety isn't good for the baby, so I haven't left. I stay here day in and day out, praying that everything is going to be okay.
"You need to talk to Asher, babe. Don't let this fester," Dee whispers.
I know she means well, and Lord knows I love her, but I don't keep things from Asher. She and Beck had a crappy start, and I know she's speaking from experience, but my not talking to Asher has nothing to do with avoiding the topic. I haven't been able to get him in the same room with me long enough to have a conversation. I think he believes that, by shutting me out completely, he's doing me a favor, but the worry for him is worse than the fear of the unknown.
I don't know what I would do if I lost him. If we lost him.
"I'm going to make sure he talks to me today. I've been trying so hard to stay up and wait for him to come home, but my body always wins the fight and I'm passed out long before he comes home. I set my alarm on my phone to go off every hour, and I don't care if I have to do it all night--I will be awake when he gets home. If he's asleep when it goes off, I'm going to wake him up and demand answers."
"Hell yeah!" Melissa cheers.
"If you need anything, promise you'll call?" Izzy asks.
"I'll call, but I won't need anything other than my man to talk to me."
She smiles sweetly at me and goes to pull herself off the floor. Her stomach is just now starting to show signs of her pregnancy.
"I'm going to head home. Nate hasn't been sleeping well at night, so I told Axel that we needed to have an early dinner and get him down before his normal bedtime. I hope that works. You let me know if you need anything, Chelcie." She leans in and gives me a hug.
I give Nate a big hug, laughing when he kisses my stomach and warns me to "bez car full."
"Such an alpha baby," Dee mumbles.
"I'm going to head out too," Melissa says. "Greg has Cohen down at the office, and the last time I let him stay all day, he was up all night fighting the bad guys. I swear, one day, that boy is going to turn into a carbon copy of Greg." She gathers up the babies' blankets off the floor, stuffs some of her diaper items back in the diaper bag, and snaps both girls into their car carriers.
"Do you need help down?" I ask.
"Nope. I've got this down to a science now. And like I would let your pregnant ass lift these heavy things. No freaking way. Later, Dee. Chelcie, I'm here if you need me, okay?"
I nod, standing to give her a hug before walking her to the door.
Once I come back to the living room, I don't even waste any time. "Well, spit it out, Dee. I know you're over there thinking all sorts of crazy shit."
"What if this isn't about the letter? What if he's having second thoughts? I hate saying it, Chelc... Hell, I hate thinking it. This whole thing is crazy complicated between you, and I just don't want to see you hurt. Maybe the letter is nothing? Maybe he's just... God, I don't know," she sighs.
One thing that annoys me about Dee is when she lets her own insecurities about men in general pass on to others. I recognize where she's coming from. You don't just turn that stuff off--a pain that has been a part of you for your whole life--but that doesn't give her a right to place that bullshit on Asher's shoulders.
"Dee," I warn.
"I know--I'm sorry. I just... Shit. I just worry about you." She shrugs her shoulders and sinks back against the couch.
"Okay, Dee. I appreciate where you're coming from, but let me tell you right now that if you ever insult the man I love like that again, I won't be responsible for what I do." Her eyes widen, but I keep going. "He has done nothing to deserve that shit you just spewed all over the place. He's had a hard time, but you know that any one of us would have felt the same pain he did when Coop died. Yeah, I know how our situation is complicated, but that's just it, Dee. It's our situation. It's brought us together. This baby, this very loved baby of ours, is our miracle. We don't look at it as a complication. I can assure you that he loves this baby because it's part of me. Yes, he loves this baby because he's a part of his brother too--but that by no stretch of the imagination means that he is transferring his feelings for the baby into some confused love."
I take a deep breath, never letting my eyes leave her shocked ones. I have never talked to her like this, but I'm not going to stand here in the middle of my own personal shit storm and let her throw Asher in the 'bad guy' category.
"We all have that person, Dee. Beck is yours. Axel is Izzy's. Melissa's is Greg. Hell, Emmy's is Maddox. Every. Single. One. Of. Us. We have that person who makes us complete. He is my person."
"You have been watching too much Grey's Anatomy," she says under her breath.
"Dee! Did you even fucking hear me? He's my person! He would never doubt our relationship or me. What is complicated to you is our perfect. We took the lemons life threw at us and started a lemonade-making factory. This, this love that you're questioning--this love is perfect."
My chest is heaving. God, it felt good to get that all out. I won't even lie--when I was on day five without seeing him, I let the same doubts filter through my mind until I realized how ridiculous I was being. Asher would never give up on me.
"I'm sorry. I just worry about you. I worry about you both, but I don't like seeing you hurting." She looks down, clearly ashamed that she let her own handicaps cloud what she knows is right.
"I'm only hurting because I don't know how to help him. I'm not asking you to borrow trouble. My pain is because I feel powerless to ease his pain. Not because he's hurting me."
"I get it. Just promise me that, if you need something, you'll call. Don't sit here and let it fester a second longer. If you miss him again tonight, call me in the morning and I promise you I will make sure you can corner his ass."
"That won't be necessary, Dee," I hear over my shoulder. The deep rumble of his voice sends shivers racing across my skin. "I can assure you that the only thing she needs right now is"--he pauses and looks over at me, his face unreadable--"her person."
I melt... Right there, I melt. It all washes away--the last two weeks of worry, hurt that he's shut me out, and pain that I don't know how to help. All that matters is that he's here now.
"Uh, got it. I'll see myself out," she meekly says.
I might have said goodbye, but the only thing my mind can comprehend at this moment is that my man is finally here. He isn't avoiding me anymore and I can finally figure out where his head has been since that ill-fated night we opened that letter.
Chapter 25 - Asher
I wait until Dee leaves before stomping over to the door and turning all the locks. I'm giving myself a second to calm down before I go talk to Chelcie. Coming in to hear Dee trying to tell Chelcie that I'm doubting our relationship... Second-fucking-guessing? Jesus Christ. Just thinking about hearing her talking that shit makes me want to hurt someone. It's a good thing she left because I was about two seconds away from blowing my fuse.
Never did I think that Chelcie would think that, but hearing that garbage and for just a second letting myself believe that Chelcie could for a second believe it is making my blood boil.
"You know I don't believe her? Right?" she says, coming up behind me and resting her forehead against my back, moving her arms slowly--and fucking hesitantly--around my waist.
Hell. Fucking. No.
It kills me that there is even a shadow of doubt in us right now.
And I did this to her.
I grasp her wrists and pull her hands around me tightly, lacing our fingers together and letting my chin drop to my chest. With just her touch, the anger I was feeling towards Dee and her verbal vomit evaporates. I'm exhausted, worried, and fuck me--scared. Scared for Chelcie and scared for our boy. Now on top of that, I'm scared that she doubts my commitment to her.
Fuck me; there is no way I'm going to let that happen.
"Hold on, Sunshine. Let me grab something, okay?"
She takes a step back, my body instantly missing
the feel of her against me.
Turning sharply, I prowl through the house--a man on a mission--and grab the one thing that's been burning a hole in my pocket for the last three weeks. The one thing that I know will end all of this doubt she's feeling.
I know the timing isn't ideal, but we've done everything else in some weird, convoluted web of twisted. Ass backwards, unconventional, and hell, there's no reason that we shouldn't keep some sort of a trend going.
When I come back into the living room, I find her gazing out the balcony door. There isn't much other than trees to look at, so I know she's just lost in thought. I take a deep breath and walk over to her.
"Sunshine. Do you love me?" Well, Asher--great fucking lead-in there, dumbass.
She tilts her head, her lips just barely tipping up. "Of course I love you, you silly man."
"That shit with Dee... Do you think that I would be with you out of obligation? Think hard about that, Chelcie. You know my past with females and you know how hard it was for me to trust."
"There is nothing that would make me doubt your reasons for being here, baby," she whispers.
"You know that I love you. You're my light, Sunshine. You're my reason for everything that I do. You're my person," I say, parroting her earlier words.
Her eyes widen and tears start to fill them. Damn, I need to hurry this up before she loses it.
"Right." I look down, fiddling with the words I need to say.
I look up, and before I can speak, she launches herself at me. I quickly move my hips back so that her stomach doesn't take the impact. She's gotten bigger in the last two weeks, and I mentally kick myself for not being here, for missing just a second of it.
With my hips pulled back from her body, her lips are just a short distance from my neck. She lifts up, coming up as far as she can on her toes, and gives me a soft kiss against my neck. I go to straighten, but she tightens her hold on my neck.
I feel her warm breath against my ear before her tongue darts out to trace the shell. Then, after the jolt passes through my body, she whispers softly, "Yes."
