Once I walk into the room, everything stops. Fresh tears trail down my cheeks. Miles lies on the bed, the part of his face that got burned wrapped loosely in a gauze bandage. Machines beep, alerting us that he is alive. He’s got an oxygen mask and an IV. His eyes remain closed, but I can see his chest rising and falling with small breaths.
I close my eyes and thank God. “Can I get close?” I look at the doctor.
He nods. “He’s asleep now, but you can hold his hand if you want to.”
I inch closer to the side of the bed with fewer cables and sit on a chair. I look at Miles for a few minutes, scanning his body. He’s got some smaller burns on his arms that don’t seem too bad, and the hairs on them are burned as well. I now understand why the doctor said it’d be a miracle. I reach for his hand and gently hold it, rubbing my fingers back and forth across his knuckles, careful not to hurt him in any way.
“I’m so sorry.” My whisper gets drowned by the beeping sounds. I lift his hand and kiss his palm. “I’m here, Miles. I’m not gonna leave your side. You’re gonna get better.” I murmur against the skin of his hand, the stagnant smell of smoke lingering in the room. Then, I sit there, watching him, for an undetermined amount of time.
Eventually, I’m asked to leave, and I meet Mr. and Mrs. Carlisle in the waiting room again.
“Come on, I’ll walk you to your car,” Mr. Carlisle says.
“But…”
He shakes his head. “Miles needs his rest, and so do you. I’m heading home, too. Sarah will stay the night.”
As much as I want to argue, I don’t. “Can I come back tomorrow?” I look between them.
“Of course,” Mrs. Carlisle smiles.
Thanking them, I walk out of the hospital with Mr. Carlisle and then drive to his house to pick up my mom.
As she drives us home from there, I look out the window, watching the dark sky above us turning lighter. I’m drained. I want to go to sleep and wake up in Miles’s bed with his laughter and teasing hands wandering my body. I shiver at the thought and sigh.
“Take a hot shower and go to bed, darling.” My mom turns off the ignition when she parks in our driveway.
“Yeah,” I mumble.
After a shower, I lie in bed, hugging my pillow and wishing it was Miles, and drift away to restless sleep.
Chapter 32
Miles
The stench of smoke is stuck in my nostrils. No matter how much oxygen they give me, I can’t get rid of the acrid smell. My body is sore, my face hurts, I feel weak. Haunting memories hit the forefront of my mind, and my eyes snap open.
“Chloe!” I cry.
“Shhhh…honey.” I turn my head and see a blurry vision of my mom.
“Mom?” I ask, my voice hoarse.
“I’m here, sweetie.” She runs a gentle hand through my hair.
“Where’s Chloe? Is she okay?” Panic rises, and my body quivers. I tried so hard to get to her. I was responsible for the girls while Brett and my dad were in that meeting. I couldn’t let anything happen to them and I’d do anything to protect them—even if it costs me my life.
“She’s okay,” my mom rushes out. Her hand continues to soothe my hair. “She’s with Brett. She’s okay,” she repeats, choking on her words.
I sigh and lift my hand to see an IV. “What happened?” I squeeze her hand.
“I was so scared. I’m so happy you’re alive.” She kisses my forehead like when I was a child. I attempt to smile, but it’s too painful.
“Let me call the nurse and tell her you’re awake.”
I nod and watch her stand. My eyes droop again, but when I hear voices, I open them and look at the nurse.
“You gave us quite the scare,” she says as she checks different machines. “How do you feel?”
“Okay… My face hurts.”
“I’ll give you a shot of painkillers now. You got burned pretty badly, and it’ll take a bit to fully heal. I’ll come back in a few to clean up the bandages and check on it. Let’s get rid of the pain first.”
I nod, feeling tired.
She leaves and returns quickly with a syringe that she connects to my IV line. I hope the painkiller kicks in fast. The right side of my face is throbbing.
Then, she lifts the gauze, checking the burn before getting to work. I have no idea what she’s doing, but I do know that the medicine hasn’t kicked in yet, and I bite back a yelp.
“Everything looks good. You’re no longer taking high-pressure oxygen. Once the doctor comes by, he’ll have more information. You’ll still stay a little longer so we can monitor your blood levels and the carbon monoxide levels in your system.”
I nod, overwhelmed with all she says. My mom walks back in, smiling.
“Tell me what’s going on.”
She breathes slowly and shakes her head, taking a seat. “They’ve been treating your burn and possible carbon monoxide poisoning. Fortunately, it seems as you won’t have any complications.” She holds my hand with both of hers. “I’ve never been so scared in my life,” her voice cracks.
“Your burn is pretty bad,” she frowns. “You’ll have scarring on the side of your face and neck.”
“Did everyone get out alive?” I feel relieved when she nods. “And the winery?”
“I’m not sure how bad the damage is. I came here before they finished putting out the fire.”
“I’m sure it’s all gone,” I shake my head.
“Don’t worry about that now. You need to rest and heal, not stress.”
A knock halts the conversation, and we both look toward the door. My heart stops, and my eyes close. Is she a dream? June looks at me with furrowed brows, chewing on her bottom lip from her place by the door. I smile at the view of her, hating the sadness marking her face.
“Come in,” my mom says as I watch her mutely.
June walks in, smiling at my mom, then me. “He woke up a little bit ago, but he’s doing okay.”
“I can speak for myself, Mom.”
“Oh, shush,” she waves me off. “Sit, June. I’m going to go grab a coffee.”
“You don’t have to…” June motions for her to stay.
“Trust me, it’ll be best for us all if I drink coffee in the morning.”
With that, June giggles and nods. She takes a seat, my eyes never wavering from her.
“Hi,” I say.
“Hi.” She keeps biting her bottom lip. “How…how are you?” She swallows thickly.
“Better, especially now that you’re here.” I reach for her hand, needing her touch.
“God, I was so scared. I kept checking my phone throughout the night in case someone called with bad news.” She bows her head and closes her eyes.
“No, babe, I’m here. I’m alive.” I give her fingers a squeeze.
“Thank God.” She grabs my hand and kisses it. I close my eyes, absorbing her touch and sweet kisses.
“I thought I’d lost you for good.” Her voice is so quiet, I almost miss what she said.
“No.” I shake my head. My fingers tighten around hers. “All I kept thinking about was that I needed to get to you. I couldn’t—” I start coughing, and June quiets me. I keep talking despite that. “I couldn’t imagine not seeing you ever again, holding you, kissing you.” I blink back tears. “Or leave things the way they were.” I shake my head and notice tears in her eyes as well.
“I’m so sorry.”
“Shhh…” I soothe her, brushing my thumb along her skin. “Everything went black, and I saw you in my vision. So beautiful, like an angel, and I knew that no matter what, I’d have you, and you’d have me.”
June trembles as she cries, and I wish I could wrap my arms around her.
“I don’t want you as a ghost. I want you alive and well. I’m not ready to lose you,” she says, keeping her eyes on mine. “I’m sorry I left the way I did. Had I opened the door when you came to my house, maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”
“No, don’t think that way. For whatever reason, thi
s shit happened.” I don’t tell her about my own guilt of keeping the girls at the winery instead of letting my mom pick them up. I was distracted and preoccupied with June. I should’ve let my mom take them. So many things could’ve gone differently.
“I love you.” Her watery eyes stare into mine.
This time I smile through the pain. Her words are a soothing balm to my agony. “I love you, too, Junebug.” I cup her face the best I can. “So damn much.”
“I shouldn’t have run the way I did.”
“Forget about it. You’re here now.”
“Even if this hadn’t happened, I’d be with you. I spoke to my mom, and she put things into perspective. I had time to digest everything, but the fire happened. I’d come back for you in a heartbeat, in a million lives.”
“I’m glad to hear that, but we still have this lifetime to live together,” I promise her.
She nods quietly, her lips skimming over my palm. I close my eyes and thank God for this woman.
We sit like this for a while. When my mom returns, the three of us talk. Well, they talk, and I mostly listen. It’s exhausting holding a conversation. The dryness in my throat doesn’t make it easier.
When the doctor comes in to check on me, June and my mom wait outside while he asks questions: How’d I sleep? Can I breathe easily? Does my face hurt?
Then, he tells me they’re going to check my lungs again, draw blood to see if there’s any carbon monoxide poisoning, and once again change the gauze on my burn. He gives my mom updates, and I’m like a guinea pig they get to perform studies on throughout the entire morning.
The good news is that the carbon monoxide has been removed from my hemoglobin. They’ll check my oxygen level through the day, and hopefully, they’ll be able to take me off oxygen by tonight.
My dad arrives after all the exams and smiles when he sees me awake. “Thank the Lord,” he murmurs. I smile at him and nod, assuring him I’m okay.
Throughout the day, my parents switch between my room and Chloe’s. At one point, Brett comes in to check on me, and I see his face visibly relax.
June stays the entire day, sometimes quietly sitting away from the commotion with a book. I always catch her eyes and smile. She returns my smile each time, blowing me kisses when no one is watching. Having her here gives me the will to fight through this. I’ve got a life to live with her, and I’m not ready to give it up. I want to reach out to her, hold her, have her lay with me though I know it’s impossible for now.
By the time night rolls around, they confirm I can sleep without oxygen since my levels are staying steady on their own.
“I have to go. They’re kickin’ me out.” June rolls her eyes.
I chuckle lightly and reach for her hand. “Thank you for being here, even with the craziness.” I kiss the top of her hand.
“I don’t want to be anywhere else. I’ll be back early tomorrow. I promise.” She leans forward and pauses. “Is this okay?”
“You better kiss me.” She grins and presses her lips to mine in a soft kiss. I sigh, closing my eyes, feeling her all around me with that simple peck.
“Love you.” I need her to know how I feel, make sure she believes me. I’m head over heels for the woman she is, for her brain, her heart, and her kindness.
“I love you, too.” She smiles. “I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of telling you.”
“Good because I know I won’t.” I hold her face.
I haven’t seen my burn yet, and I worry how it’ll look, but I’m certain June will stay by my side.
“Sleep.” She raises her eyebrows meaningfully.
“Yes, ma’am,” I wink. “Go on before it’s late. Drive safely.”
She nods, and I watch her go, sighing. My eyes close, and I hear my mom settle beside me.
“Go sleep at home, Mom.” I don’t bother opening my eyes.
“Nope, I’m staying. Sleep, honey. If you need anything, I’ll be here.”
“Thanks, Mom.” Despite my closed eyes, the visions of the fire startle me.
I look around the room, unable to relax. The memory of the screams and the flaming heat trapping me, the suffocating feeling that I couldn’t do enough to save the people I love or that I wouldn’t see those same people again.
I take a deep breath, calming my racing heart. Fortunately, that’s not the outcome, but the fear is embedded in me. I worry Chloe won’t overcome it. I worry Charlie is full of fear for her sister. I worry they’ll be scared to look at me with a scar, a constant reminder of what we lived through.
My body tenses, and a silent cry moves through me. I let it all out after a busy day of tests, family visits, and staying strong for everyone. I’m not sure how to overcome the mental aspect of this. My body may be healing, but the mind’s trickier to combat.
My mom’s phone pings and I reach for it before she wakes up. Seeing Madison’s name, I open the text message.
Madison: I can sense your sadness. I love you, Smiles.
Mom: I love you too, Dimples. How’d you know to text me on Mom’s phone?
Madison: Twin intuition. That and your phone is no more
Mom: Thanks. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. You’re okay?
Madison: As okay as I can be after hearing what happened and not being able to be there with y’all
Mom: It’s okay. We’ll see you soon
I say goodnight to my sister and place the phone back on the table by the bed. Closing my eyes, I attempt to sleep through the flashes of memory. If I can overcome that, then it’s a step in the positive direction.
Chapter 33
June
Miles is finally going home today, and I can finally breathe a little easier. The pressure in my chest has started to ease since I heard the news. I’m so grateful that he’s okay. I’m meeting him at his house after checking in with my mom at the Carlisle home. I want to see how Charlie and Chloe are doing. Brett’s been staying with his parents since Chloe was discharged. The girls are having a hard time, and Brett’s doing the best he can to soothe their hearts and calm their fears.
As for Miles, he’s acting as if he’s okay, but I can tell he’s not. I’ve visited him every day he’s been in the hospital. There’s an underlying fear in his green eyes he tries to mask. I hope that being home helps him.
From the Carlisle home, I head to Miles’s and make sure everything is ready for his arrival. It’s not much, but I made a pan of lasagna at my house, so I pre-heat the oven to bake it. I bought flowers and put them in a vase. I also grabbed letters and drawings from Charlie and Chloe when I went to see my mom. I smile as I see their drawings of Miles and place them on the counter by the flowers. He’ll love them.
When the front door opens, my heart races as if it’s the first time I’m seeing him. Miles walks in with Mrs. Carlisle.
“Honey, I’m home,” he says flatly.
His mom helps him walk with her arm around his waist. I smile at his attempt at a joke, but he looks exhausted. His eyes are sunken. From what he’s told me, he hasn’t been sleeping well. My hope is that he’ll get more rest in his own bed.
“Hey.” I walk up to him, wrapping my arms around him carefully. “So glad you’re here.” I kiss his chest. Miles holds me for a beat longer than normal, burying his nose in my hair.
“Me too.”
I smile at Mrs. Carlisle and help her guide Miles to sit at the counter. “Charlie and Chloe sent these.” I push the papers toward him.
He smiles, eyes watering as he looks at each drawing and note with patience.
I stand by his mom and whisper, “How is he?”
“He’ll be okay. An emotional few days.” I nod in understanding. Emotional is an understatement.
“Was Brett home?” she asks.
“Yeah.”
“Thank goodness. He’s been on damage control at the winery, but his daughters need him more.”
I nod in agreement. The most important thing right now is everyone’s health and well-being, not the busines
s. I don’t know Brett well enough to talk to him about that, though, and I’m sure his parents will take that on.
She says her goodbyes, letting us know she’ll call in the morning, and heads home. Miles is still sitting on the stool after I close the door. I walk to the other side of the island to look at him.
“I have a lasagna in the oven. Are you hungry?”
“That’s great, thanks.” He’s melancholy, shoulders sagged.
“What’s wrong?” I walk over to him, and he scoots his stool back so I can stand near him.
He shakes his head, so I hug him tightly, pressing a kiss to his chest. I hope he can feel the love I have for him pouring out of me.
“Thanks for being here,” he whispers into my ear.
“Where else would I be?” I lean back and lift my brows with a small smile.
“You’re right. I’m the only person you wanna be by,” he teases.
“Very true. Nowhere else I’d rather be.” I brush my lips against his, careful not to hurt him. Miles closes his eyes, his hands tightening on my waist.
“I’ve been dying to feel you like this. Out of that damn hospital bed.”
“I’m not goin’ anywhere,” I promise. “How about we eat, and then you rest?”
“I’ve been resting for days.” He argues with me, but I won’t give in.
“Good, you have a few more days to continue resting. We’ll lounge on the couch and watch whatever you want.” I wink.
He knows I’m not really a fan of the shows he watches, but I’ll watch them for the rest of my life if it means he’s by my side.
“I love you.” His words are soft against my cheek, his scruff longer than usual and prickling me. The only spot that's clear of facial hair is the side with the burn.
“I love you, too.” My eyes meet his.
With a quick peck, I move around the kitchen, serving us both sweet tea and checking on the lasagna. While it finishes cooking, I set two plates on the island. Miles offers to help, but I won’t have it. Once the lasagna is ready, I pull it out of the oven.
Not So Charming: A Hate to Lovers Romance (Carlisle Cellars Book 1) Page 21
