Linus at Large
Book Nine in the Undraland Series
Mary E. Twomey
Contents
Linus at Large
Acknowledgments
1. Hazel
2. Hold the Phone
3. The Conversation
4. Clara Barton
5. My Butt
6. Spiders in My Brain
7. Super Tucker
8. Brotherhood
9. The Thing about a Good Brother
10. Free
11. 1472 I-Don’t-Give-A-Crap Avenue
12. The Return of the Viking Kind
13. Who I Am
14. Viggo’s Mistake
15. When Powers are Powerless
16. I Killed Olaf
17. My Stupid Choice
18. Foss’s Stupid Choice
19. The Terrifying Love of Tucker
20. A Silent Wife
21. All the Daughters
22. Foss’s Right Hand
23. Viktigast Död Sköld
24. Marry Me
25. Whatever it Takes
26. The Alliance
27. For Undraland
28. Just a Little Blood
29. Twenty-Nine
30. Pink Bunny
31. Safety Dance
32. An Exchange of Rings
Epilogue
Taste
1. Freddy Krueger, Bugs and Wolves
Other books by Mary E. Twomey
Linus at Large
Book Nine in the Undraland Series
An Undraland: Blood Novel
By
Mary E. Twomey
Copyright © 2015 Mary E. Twomey
Cover Art by Humble Nations
Author Photo by Lisabeth Photography
All rights reserved.
First Edition: January 2016
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
ISBN-13: 978-1522773214
ISBN-10: 1522773215
http://www.maryetwomey.com
For my brothers, Bruce and Brian.
There is nothing I would not do.
And for Vin Diesel,
Who I’m hoping is a good sport.
If not, I’m pretty sure my muscles are bigger.
I mean, I can lift like, fifty pounds.
Acknowledgments
This series would not have happened without the following walking miracles:
Bailey Soper and Ruth Gross,
Who edited this entire monster of a series and pretended that I wasn’t inconveniencing them by begging for their genius and their red pens.
The Write Club and the Powerhouse Summit,
Whose critiques, marketing advice and friendship catapulted me into a nine-part series I’m not sure I was ready for at the time.
Man, you guys make a great safety net.
Jen Like and Jason Dandy,
Who sat for hours at various coffee bars and restaurants across from me, building worlds out of bricks that actually held. Thanks for listening to my crazy, and encouraging me to put it into print.
My Wombats,
I have the best fanbase on earth, Undraland, the Moon, and beyond. Thank you for writing in to tell me what these books mean to you. Thank you for reviewing them online, and declaring your love of these books to your friends. You each deserve your own candy-dispensing rocket ship.
(I can’t actually buy you each one of those, but you so deserve one. Also, I think the ability to dispense candy is the one thing rocket ships are missing. I should probably let NASA know. Hold on, let me find my phone…)
1
Hazel
When I was in grade school, I hated the color of my eyes. While hazel looks great on lots of people, the popular girl in the fourth grade at the school in Connecticut was blonde with bright blue eyes. I got over it and eventually stopped caring about things like pretty (which was doubly enforced by this trek spent mostly sleeping on the ground and bathing using splashes of water from an old basin or a river). But when my long-dead twin brother finally opened his eyes, I had never been more grateful to see the identical hazel staring back at me. It was the most beautiful color I’d ever seen. It was my brother, and I was home.
Actually, I was in Undraland. Nøkken, to be exact. We were in the grass next to the river Nik had died in, the lush greenery of Nøkken nothing compared to the sight of my brother.
Though it was my brother, he looked different. Somehow when I’d poured his soul into his mouth (don’t get me started explaining that long story), a slow change began morphing his body to look more Undran than his original one. He was taller now, easily as tall as Jamie. His blond hair that had been just a shade darker than mine mutated to a chestnut brown I couldn’t stop staring at. His chemo-deteriorated body that had been a bony shell when he’d died was now strong and well-kept.
But the eyes – the eyes were still his, and thus, were mine.
Jens was gentle as he and Jamie helped Linus to sit up on the slab of wood that had served as a stretcher. It was actually the lid to the coffin my brother had been buried in, and still had dirt caked in the crevices.
I wanted to help. Heck, I wanted to jump up and down screaming that my brother was back. I couldn’t move. So long had I been carrying my torch alone that suddenly having my other half reunited to me was a shock to my system I couldn’t compute. My brain was stuck on white noise.
Linus was blinking, turning his head to the left and right to size up the situation he’d awoken in. When his hazel eyes fell on me, there was the light of recognition I’d been holding my breath for. “Lucy? Are we dead?”
In the next heartbeat, my mouth dropped open, and I fainted. I collapsed on the grass in a pile of ungraceful limbs before anyone could catch me. I don’t actually recall the descent there, but suffice to say, I hit the ground with a thud – Jamie following soon after. Stupid laplanding bond.
I awoke some amount of time later to utter chaos. My body was floating, resting in Tucker’s arms as he stood in the corner of a room. My head was lolling over the crook of his arm, my mouth open like a guppy. The dingy inn was decorated in sailor garb, complete with a rusted anchor hanging from the ceiling like a chandelier. But I didn’t see any of it really; my only focus was Linus.
“Calm down, Linus! You have to take a breath! She’s alright; she just fainted, is all.” Jens was shouting as he gripped a thrashing Linus in a bear hug from behind.
“Get your perv hands off her, you dick!”
Tucker shot back, “At least get to know me first before calling out my true colors. Your sister knows exactly how perverted my hands can be, and she doesn’t mind one bit.” His smile was evil. “In fact, your sister’s seen all of me, and keeps coming around. Can’t. Get. Enough.”
This, of course, made Linus attack with renewed vigor, but Jens and Foss were ready. “Not helping, Tuck!” Jens glared at Tucker as he and Foss fought to restrain the man who was far stronger than he should have been. Luckily, Jens had recently been enhanced by his trip down to the bottom of the river in Nøkken, where he asked Havard, the Will o’ the Wisp, for the ability to be the best guard I could ask for. Havard had delivered, thank goodness. Linus was a little scary with the much larger muscles, swinging his fists around while still clad in his filthy hospital gown.
I made
to stand on my own, but Tucker was careful with me, only allowing me enough motion so I didn’t swoon and lose it again. My feet tapped back on the floor, but Tucker’s arm stayed wrapped around my back. The tool of a fire elf maintained eye contact with Linus when he lowered his face to my cheek and brushed his lips against me, taking his time to draw out the tease and pucker his lips on the skin there. “You feeling better, love?”
Foss growled at the elf. “Shut up, slave!”
I didn’t answer Tuck; he didn’t need more than the annoyed swat I gave his cheek. With my mouth wide open and my limbs unsteady, I moved away from the shameless playboy and took a hesitant step toward my raging brother. I mouthed his name, eyes like a deer in stadium lights (headlights would have been too small a simile for the shock that was still rolling through me).
“Jens, let me go, you jag!” He snarled at Foss, “And who the smack are you? Back up off me, man!”
Jens tightened his hold. “If we let go right now, you’ll knock her clean over. You have to calm down, and I’ll let you go.”
Linus struggled in vain a few more times before he consented to ceasing his fight. He held up his hands, breathing like a race horse, our eyes locked in on each other. “I’m cool. See? I’m cool.”
Jens waited a few more seconds for safety’s sake before releasing Linus.
It was a crash, a crush and a hug that collected all the cells in my body and shook them up like a baby rattle. My world was upside down and finally, finally, right side up. “Is it… Is it you? Am I dreaming?” I knew that when words found me, they would be all the wrong ones. He didn’t feel or smell like Linus, but the click inside me was there. Something in me that had been broken slid back into its hinges, mending my shattered psyche by an unfathomably necessary degree.
“Of course it’s me. Are we dead? Is this dead? It’s not Heaven. Not Hell. Where are we?”
“Undraland,” I said, my voice coming out high pitched and strained. “You were dead, but I found you. You’re back. I got you back!” At this, the tears I was shocked had not started earlier began to shoot out of me. “I got you back!”
His tears were almost as steady as mine, wetting my hair and mixing with the emotion on my cheeks. “I remember dying. I remember the machines in the hospital. That stupid beeping that got slower and slower. I remember it all getting dark, and then I couldn’t feel you anymore.” He closed his eyes as he squeezed me harder than I could handle and still breathe, so I made the logical choice and stopped breathing rather than end the embrace.
It was worth it.
Jamie gasped as he came to on the bed. “Can’t… breathe!”
Jens tapped Linus on the shoulder. “Ease up, Line. You’re a lot stronger than you remember. You’re hurting her.”
Linus loosened his grip just enough to allow my ribs the space to contract. “I felt you gone, and it was awful. It was nothing. I’ve felt nothing and been nowhere for… how long? Was I really dead?”
I was useless for information. Let’s face it, since Linus opened his eyes, mine only saw him and processed precious little else.
Jens intervened. “You’ve been dead for two years. We dug you out of the ground and Lucy brought you back.”
Jamie fished around in his bag and pulled out a spare set of clothing. “Here. You might feel more like yourself in these. You can even wash up in the corner over there.”
Linus was reluctant to release me, but the promise of a bath and fresh clothing could not be ignored. “Thanks, man. Who the smack are you?”
Jamie chuckled at how similar Linus sounded to me. “I’m Jamie, but none of that matters right now. Go wash up. There’ll be plenty of time for the rest of us later. Lucy deserves to be with her brother.”
A light of recognition flickered over Linus’s features, and I loved how easy he made it to watch his brain play out on his face. “Jamie. Prince Jamie from Tonttu?” He extended his unsteady hand with a hesitant grin. “Jens’s best friend. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Jamie beamed. “Likewise. The famous Linus Kincaid. I knew I’d take one look at you and see a brother.”
Linus looked taken aback at the genuine kindness that was Jamie. His mouth opened and then closed, and then he nodded. “Well, alright then. I guess Jens wasn’t exaggerating about how cool you are.” He took the clothes. “Thanks for this.”
Linus left my side to go behind the partition, and a swoon hit me again. “I need to sit down.” I’d never been a fainter, but these were extreme circumstances.
Jens had his hand on my elbow, guiding me to the nearest chair and lowering me into it. “Tuck, could you grab us some fruit or something? Lucy needs some sugar. Actually, we haven’t eaten in who knows how long. Could you just order a crap ton of food for the whole lot of us?”
Tucker made an under the breath comment about being reduced to an errand boy, but decided upon being helpful so his charge didn’t pass out on the floor again. Jamie sat down on the bed, just in case.
“It’s real,” I whispered to Jens, whose nose was an inch from mine. “We did it. Linus is back. He… I… Linus!”
Jens nodded, swallowing hard. “I’m sorry we tried to bury him. You were right on this. I was wrong.” He kissed my lips once, and then leaned his forehead to mine with his eyes closed. “We did it.”
Foss had been silent, taking in magic he had never thought possible. He brought me a canteen, and when I took it, he caught my eye. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think it could happen. I’d follow you across oceans, but I doubted you. Unforgiveable.”
“I don’t know how much I believed me,” I admitted. “But Linus. I mean, it’s real, right?” Then a fear stronger than reality punched me in the face with its power to rock my world. “Am I in the cell? Am I imagining this? Jamie?” I looked past Jens and Foss to find my buddy. “Jamie!”
He moved from the bed to stand at my other side so I was completely boxed against the wall in my chair by the three. “It’s real,” Jamie confirmed in a gentle voice. “I saw him. I touched his hand. Linus is real. We’re not in the cell.” He reached down and picked up my hand. “See? You can touch me. That couldn’t happen in the cell.”
Linus came out from behind the partition sparkling clean in new clothes and with a brilliant smile on his face. He was a sight for sore eyes, and when my tired eyes met his, I breathed. It was real. I couldn’t imagine the freaky twin pull I now felt that had been muted for two years. Jamie and Jens were connected to my heart, but Linus was a tug in my gut.
With all the swagger in the world, Linus draped himself down on the nearest empty chair. “So, other than yet another sponge bath, what’d I miss?”
2
Hold the Phone
Jens and Jamie tag-teamed so much information, even I was getting overwhelmed – and I’d actually lived through it all. None of it was new to me, but the blast of over eight hundred days that were new to Linus was staggering. Tucker had come in and out, remaining vigilant in checking the perimeter and ensuring we were all safe. I stayed mostly quiet, taking in the shock as gracefully as could be managed. Foss watched with his arms crossed over his chest, sitting back in his chair at the head of the table as he silently observed the newcomer and the slight shift in the group dynamic.
We ate like Vikings at a celebration, but Linus and Jens seemed to be in a contest to see who could eat a truck bed full of food first. I couldn’t fathom what the bill would be for the abundance spread out on the table, floor and nightstand.
When Jens paused to take a drink and, you know, breathe between inhaling whole turkey legs, Linus started firing out questions. It had been hours, and Jens had only made it to where we’d lost Nik in Nøkken. “Okay, sidebar. Why am I different?”
“Different how?” Jamie inquired, consuming his food like a gentleman next to Jens the Ravager and Linus the Glutton.
“Dude, I’m huge! I’m crazy tall and ripped like a MMA fighter. I know I wasn’t lifting anything while I was dead. What gives?”
Ja
mie’s reply was thoughtful. “There’s no answer to that, because you’re the first person I’ve ever heard of to come back from the dead.”
“Your hair’s brown now,” Jens informed Linus, jabbing him with his elbow.
Linus jabbed back with a grin, and they had a ten-second elbow war that filled my heart to the exploding point. “My hair’s brown?” Linus glanced up, but still couldn’t see the short follicles to verify the information. “How? Why?”
Jens shrugged, but I had a feeling I knew the answer to that one, so I took the floor. “It’s the wall Mom put in our minds to keep our powers from us. It changed our hair color to blond. I think something happened when I put your soul back in you. I think it took your wall away. You’re not just human anymore, Linus. You’re Undran.”
Linus held up his arms. “Wait, hold the phone.”
I extended my hand across the table, and Linus placed an imaginary phone in it.
“Mom put a wall in our minds? Go back to that.”
I held the pretend phone to my ear and explained the situation as if I was doing it over long distance. Linus did the same, listening intently to the call. “Mom didn’t want us to use our power; it’s what got the sirens killed and the Huldras kicked out of Undraland. She wanted to keep us hidden, so the wall in our minds absorbed our powers.” I pointed to my hair. “I can’t access anything magical, but something tells me that you might be able to now.”
“Whoa!” We hung up our fake phones simultaneously. “So I’m human, wind elf and Huldra? Wicked!” His face fell. “If only men could control with their whistles. That would be sweet!”
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